Issue243 请多指教！

caleUID: 150437

Issue243 "The true value of a civilization is reflected in its artistic creation rather than in its scientific accomplishments."

The speaker argues that the true value of a civilization is better conveyed by is artistic creation. I agree insofar as the progress of arts plays an important role in the overall development of the society. However, in my opinion, it is also necessary for us to take into accounts the scientific accomplishment of a society that is equally indispensable as that of art, while assessing the value of a certain civilization. In the following discussion, I will show my evidence to substantiate my view.

On the one hand, the true value of a civilization can be well conveyed by people's achievements in arts. They represent the accumulation of the achievements in the mental world acquired in human history, which is typical of the value of a certain civilization; and have played an indispensable role in the advancement of human society. Arts can always shape human's mind, enrich people's inner world, and even agitate for social changes. One glance back to the history of artistic development will justify the truth of my view. Goethe's The Sorrow of Young Wherther is believed to have affected the German youths of a whole Generation, even the French emperor Napoleon once conceded that he had read this book for 7 times. What's more, it is also said by Napoleon that the revolutionary thoughts expressed in Rousseau's works directly influenced the breakout of the French Revolution. Therefore, we can see the significance of art in the evolution of human society and the necessity to appraise the value of a society with reference to the artistic achievement.      

On the other hand, however, we cannot make an objective and effective evaluation in the value of a civilization without taking into consideration the scientific achievements in this society. To evaluate the value of a civilization and then find out its advantage and disadvantage, we have to inevitably refer to the lives of its people, which depend on the level of science and technology and can best demonstrate the superiority or inferiority of a certain civilization. It is easy to understand that the mere prosperity of art cannot guarantee the well being of the whole country. The perdition of the Babylonia will serve to substantiate my view. Only with the help of the advancement of science and technology, can we ensure both the living condition of the people and the stability of the country. Seeing the significance of science in the evolution of human society, how can we evaluate exactly without referring to the accomplishment of science and technology?

In the final analysis, artistic accomplishments and scientific achievements are separately representative of one aspect of the civilization of a society, depending on both of which comes the current prosperity of the nation. Both of the two are just like the two wheel of a bicycle, the former pull the latter forward, and the latter push the former in return. It is clear that without the interaction between them, neither of the two can develop effectively, and thus ignoring either of the two, we will unavoidably lose some part of a civilization that should have been worth our attention.

To sum up, I partly consent to the author and then form my own position. Through the discussion mentioned above, which seems to be more persuasive as a whole, we can easily reach the conclusion that we can not separate each of the scientific accomplishment and the artistic achievement in the process of evaluating the true value of a certain civilization.
这是我最怕的艺术类，由于是限时，所以就没怎么细想，写完了检查时感觉有点跑题的嫌疑，例子也觉得举的不恰当，我的论述基本上是基于这样的因果关系：因为艺术和科学在人类文明的发展过程中起到了非常重要的作用，所以在考察文明的价值时，二者的成果都要考虑。 不知者算不算因果无关，呵呵。大家给提提意见，不行我就重写。

caleUID: 150437

呵呵，现在帖子沉的好快呀，顶！

caleUID: 150437

再顶一下！

caleUID: 150437

最后顶一下，大家帮忙改改吧，谢谢！

apolloxpUID: 156355

不错，贴到word里几乎找不到错。
The speaker argues that the true value of a civilization is better conveyed by is（its） artistic creation. I agree insofar as the progress of arts plays an important role in the overall development of the society. However, in my opinion, it is also necessary for us to take into accounts the scientific accomplishment of a society that is equally indispensable as that of art, while assessing the value of a certain civilization. In the following discussion, I will show my evidence to substantiate my view.

On the one hand, the true value of a civilization can be well conveyed by people's achievements in arts. They represent the accumulation of the achievements in the mental world acquired in human history, which is typical of the value of a certain civilization; and have played an indispensable role in the advancement of human society. Arts can always shape human's mind, enrich people's inner world, and even agitate for social changes. One glance back to the history of artistic development will justify the truth of my view. Goethe's The Sorrow of Young Wherther is believed to have affected the German youths of a whole Generation, even the French emperor Napoleon once conceded that he had read this book for 7 times. What's more, it is also said by Napoleon that the revolutionary thoughts expressed in Rousseau's works directly influenced the breakout of the French Revolution. Therefore, we can see the significance of art in the evolution of human society and the necessity to appraise the value of a society with reference to the artistic achievement.

On the other hand, however, we cannot make an objective and effective evaluation in the value of a civilization without taking into consideration the scientific achievements in this society. To evaluate the value of a civilization and then find out its advantage and disadvantage（是不是该用复数）, we have to inevitably refer to the lives of its people, which depend on the level of science and technology and can best demonstrate the superiority or inferiority of a certain civilization. It is easy to understand that the mere prosperity of art cannot guarantee the well being of the whole country. The perdition of the Babylonia will serve to substantiate my view.（似乎应该稍微分析一下例子） Only with the help of the advancement of science and technology, can we ensure both the living condition of the people and the stability of the country. Seeing the significance of science in the evolution of human society, how can we evaluate exactly without referring to the accomplishment of science and technology?

In the final analysis, artistic accomplishments and scientific achievements are separately representative of one aspect of the civilization of a society, depending on both of which comes the current prosperity of the nation.（看不懂） Both of the two are just like the two wheel（wheels） of a bicycle, the former pull the latter forward, and the latter push the former in return. It is clear that without the interaction between them, neither of the two can develop effectively, and thus ignoring either of the two, we will unavoidably lose some part of a civilization that should have been worth our attention.

To sum up, I partly consent to the author and then form my own position. Through the discussion mentioned above, which seems to be more persuasive as a whole, we can easily reach the conclusion that we can not separate each of the scientific accomplishment and the artistic achievement in the process of evaluating the true value of a certain civilization.
总得来说文章写得不错，我也挑不出别的毛病了。句式的变化也做到了。pfpf

apolloxpUID: 156355

还有第一个理由段里的例子与你的那段逻辑演绎配不上.
你得把例子再做进一步讨论往你的分析上靠