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[优秀习作] issue114 又一次限时失败,受挫折中 [复制链接]

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发表于 2004-3-28 08:44:58 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
Issue 114
Humanity has made little real progress over the past century or so. Technological innovations have taken place, but the overall condition of humanity is no better. War, violence and poverty are still with us. Technology cannot change the condition of humanity.
人性在上个世纪并没有给社会的发展带来多大帮助。技术取得了革命性的发展,但是整个世界的人性并没有得到改善。战争、暴力、贫穷一直困扰着我们。技术的发展并不能带动人性的发展。


Humanity, defined as the quality of being human which is marked by compassion, sympathy or consideration for humans or animals, has improved with the development of technological innovations. Although, war, violence and poverty are still around us, these defects in humanity could be gradually amended through ceaseless conscious efforts.

With the social developments and technological innovations, humanity has improved as well. There are less war and violence nowadays comparing with old days, since more and more people long for peace and disgust with war and violence. Since war and violence, symbols of brutality to some extent, kill so many immaculate beings in an instantaneous time, bring social turbulences, and hold back the development of economy, war and violence are exposed to drastic revolts in recent times, as the rallies happened before the war between America and Iraq. Although the gap between affluence and poverty still exists, more and more people begin to pay attention to this problem and make use of various approaches to solve it, as the numerous sustentation funds from developed countries to developing countries every year. All these improvements show evidence that humanity is improving.

The main reason of the improvement of humanity is that people have more time to consider questions and defects existing in the humanity, and then continuously review these defects in order to make them better than ever. Especially after the Second Industry Revolution, technological innovations brought productivity increased in a large extent, general educations became popular and ordinary people have rights to be educated. With the increasing of productivity, which is one reason for the improvement of humanity, people gain more leisure time to consider problems in humanity. However, considering humanity is hard to realize in ancient times since people took care of how to solve problems about survival, rather than humanity. The popularization of education is another reason for the improvement of humanity. Education, especially modern education, emphasizes on the moral construction. In China, students have lessons about philosophy, an important lesson imparting humanity and helping students to establish correct worldviews, from elementary schools to universities. Both the increasing of productivity and popularization of education are results of technological innovations. Therefore, technology development is a crucial reason promoting the improvement of humanity.

If there were no improvement of humanity, the world would have been hard to imagine. A drastic discussion about whether government should admit the research of human clone is ended with the winning of restriction of this technology. Why does this conclusion draw though the technology of clone surely could solve many problems? It is humanity that requires the natural order about the human multiplication which has been threaten by clone in that some evil scientists could use it to produce human and make many troubles in the society. As a result, the society is advancing with the improvement of technologies and humanity.

Although there are still some immoral conducts in ordinary lives, such as the existing wars, violence and poverty, through our ceaseless conscious efforts as well as our firm belief in mutual respect and tolerance can we essentially improve human conditions, bringing about a world of mutual compassion, sympathy and consideration for humans and animals. (528 words)


最近信心狂受打击
大家继续掐
不过觉得这个题目也挺----
唉!
郁闷ing~~~~~~~~
爱情无需刻意去把握,越是想紧紧地抓牢自己的爱情,反而容易失去自我,失去原则,失去彼此之间本来应该保持的宽容和谅解,爱情也会因此而变的毫无美感。
每个人都希望自己拥有幸福美满的婚姻和爱情,但是爱是需要能力的,这个能力就是让你爱的人爱你。
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沙发
发表于 2004-3-28 09:08:52 |只看该作者
Issue 114
Humanity has made little real progress over the past century or so. Technological innovations have taken place, but the overall condition of humanity is no better. War, violence and poverty are still with us. Technology cannot change the condition of humanity.
人性在上个世纪并没有给社会的发展带来多大帮助。技术取得了革命性的发展,但是整个世界的人性并没有得到改善。战争、暴力、贫穷一直困扰着我们。技术的发展并不能带动人性的发展。


Humanity, defined as the quality of being human human being, which is marked by compassion, sympathy or consideration for humans or animals, has improved with the development of technological innovations. Although, war, violence and poverty are still around us, these defects in humanity could be gradually amended through ceaseless conscious efforts. 疑问:饥饿算人性的缺陷吗?

With the social developments and technological innovations, humanity has improved as well. There are less war and violence nowadays comparing with old days, since more and more people long for peace and disgust with disgust 好像是及物动词 war and violence. Since war and violence, symbols of brutality to some extent, kill so many immaculate beings in an instantaneous time, bring social turbulences, and hold back the development of economy, war and violence are exposed to drastic revolts in recent times, as the rallies happened before the war between America and Iraq. Although the gap between affluence and poverty still exists, more and more people begin to pay attention to this problem and make use of various approaches to solve it, as the numerous sustentation funds from developed countries to developing countries every year. All these improvements show evidence that humanity is improving.

现象:人性确实进步了。不过伊拉克战争的例子好像不太好,这场战争正是人性阴暗面的反映――打着正义的幌子,行强取豪夺之事。

The main reason of the improvement of humanity is that people have more time to consider questions and defects existing in the humanity, and then continuously review these defects in order to make them better than ever. Especially after the Second Industry Revolution, technological innovations brought productivity increased in a large extent, general educations became popular and ordinary people have rights to be educated. With the increasing of productivity, which is one reason for the improvement of humanity, people gain more leisure time to consider problems in humanity. However, considering humanity is hard to realize in ancient times since people took care of how to solve problems about survival, rather than humanity. The popularization of education is another reason for the improvement of humanity. Education, especially modern education, emphasizes on the moral construction. In China, students have lessons about philosophy, an important lesson imparting humanity and helping students to establish correct worldviews, from elementary schools to universities. Both the increasing of productivity and popularization of education are results of technological innovations. Therefore, technology development is a crucial reason promoting the improvement of humanity.

人性进步的原因。

If there were no improvement of humanity, the world would have been hard to imagine. A drastic discussion about whether government should admit the research of human clone is ended with the winning of restriction of this technology. Why does this conclusion draw though the technology of clone surely could solve many problems? It is humanity that requires the natural order about the human multiplication which has been threaten by clone in that some evil scientists could use it to produce human and make many troubles in the society. As a result, the society is advancing with the improvement of technologies and humanity.

进一步展开,论述如果人性没有进步,社会会怎样。说实话,我觉得这里举个例子不如分析几句。

Although there are still some immoral conducts in ordinary lives, such as the existing wars, violence and poverty, through our ceaseless conscious efforts as well as our firm belief in mutual respect and tolerance can we essentially improve human conditions, bringing about a world of mutual compassion, sympathy and consideration for humans and animals. (528 words)

我认为按照反驳原题的立场来写比较难。支持原题比较好写。呵呵,这又是小天使对自己的强化训练吗?
下面是我的提纲,请你看看:)
Position:支持原题。
1.现象:上个世纪以来,科技取得了极大的进展,但是人性,很遗憾,没有明显的进步。例子,伊拉克战争,许多高科技犯罪,以及日常生活中体现出来的许多问题。
2.原因:科技的进步,经济的发展,使得人们的生存压力比以前更大了。竞争,经济地位的悬殊,社会地位的反差,使得很多人心里上的阴暗面被刺激,被放大,产生了很多的社会问题。
3.让步:尽管人性的现状让人担心,但是我们有理由相信,经过一段时间的混乱和骚动,人性终究会回复平静,达到一个更高的层次。
一步步向目标前进中!

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板凳
发表于 2004-3-28 10:38:42 |只看该作者
Humanity, defined as the quality of being human which is marked by compassion, (sympathy or consideration for humans or animals), 人性的特征是这些吗has improved with the development of technological innovations. Although, war, violence and poverty are still around us, these defects in humanity could be gradually (amended) ameliorated through ceaselessly conscious efforts.开头先定义一下不错以防歧义

With the social development(s) and technological innovations, humanity has improved as well. There are less war and violence nowadays comparing with old daysthe past, since more and more people long for peace and disgust with war and violence. Since war and violence, symbols of brutality to some extent, kill so many immaculate beings in an instantaneous time, bring social turbulences, and hold back the development of economy, war and violence are exposed to drastic revolts in recent times, as the rallies happened before the war between America and Iraq. Although the gap between affluence and poverty still exists, more and more people begin to pay attention to this problem and make use of various approaches to solve it, as the numerous sustentation funds from developed countries to developing countries every year. All these improvements show evidence that humanity is improving.
这段没什么说服力,你的主题句是科技革新改善了人性,主题句定的太大了,应该缩小范围。而且较空洞和抽象
The main reason of the improvement of humanity is that people have more time to consider questions and defects existing in the humanity, and then continuously review these defects in order to make them better than ever. Especially after the Second Industry Revolution, technological innovations brought productivity increased in a large extent, general educations became popular and ordinary people have rights to be educated. With the increasing of productivity, which is one reason for the improvement of humanity, people gain more leisure time to consider problems in humanity. However, considering humanity is hard to realize in ancient times since people took care of how to solve problems about survival, rather than humanity. The popularization of education is another reason for the improvement of humanity. Education, especially modern education, emphasizes on the moral construction. In China, students have lessons about philosophy, an important lesson imparting humanity and helping students to establish correct worldviews, from elementary schools to universities. Both the increasing of productivity and popularization of education are results of technological innovations. Therefore, technology development is a crucial reason promoting the improvement of humanity.

If there were no improvement of humanity, the world would have been hard to imagine. 这句话中文意味好重A drastic discussion about whether government should admit the research of human clone is ended with the winning of restriction of this technology. Why does this conclusion draw though the technology of clone surely could solve many problems? It is humanity that requires the natural order about the human multiplication which has been threaten by clone in that some evil scientists could use it to produce human and make many troubles in the society. As a result, the society is advancing with the improvement of technologies and humanity.这段主题句不好,而且请问这段你想论述什么呢

Although there are still some immoral conducts in ordinary lives, such as the existing wars, violence and poverty, through our ceaseless conscious efforts as well as our firm belief in mutual respect and tolerance can we essentially improve human conditions, bringing about a world of mutual compassion, sympathy and consideration for humans and animals. (528 words)
感觉这片文章不太好,几个论点没想好,其实这道题从人性着手比较难,你可以从人类的状态下手可能好写一点。一个建议如果状态不好,不要逼自己写,可以看看范文或其他的文章,会好很多。泼冷水了,请多包涵。
莫听穿林打叶声,
何妨吟啸且徐行,
竹杖芒鞋轻胜马。
谁怕!
一蓑烟雨任平生。


料峭春风吹酒醒,
微冷。
山头斜照却相迎。
回首向来萧瑟处,
归去,
也无风雨也无晴。

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地板
发表于 2004-3-28 10:42:20 |只看该作者
If there were no improvement of humanity, the world would have been hard to imagine.

HOHO,确实读着HORRIBLE,姐姐换换吧,应该很短就表达出来了的。
以上言论仅代表个人观点

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发表于 2004-3-28 11:16:25 |只看该作者
占座
曾经沧海难为水
除却巫山不是云

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发表于 2004-3-28 11:21:06 |只看该作者
Humanity, defined as the quality of being human which is marked by compassion, sympathy or consideration for humans or animals, has improved with the development of technological innovations. Although, war, violence and poverty are still around us, these(reflection of) defects in humanity could be gradually amended through ceaseless conscious efforts.

With [U]the social developments [/U]没必要  and technological innovations, humanity has improved as well. There are less war(s) and violence nowadays comparing with old days, since more and more people long for peace and disgust with war and violence.[U] Since war and violence, symbols of brutality to some extent, kill so many immaculate beings in an instantaneous time, bring social turbulences, and hold back the development of economy, war and violence are exposed to drastic revolts in recent times, as the rallies happened before the war between America and Iraq.[/U](憋死了) 战争的恶劣影响不是重点,人类认识到人性的误区才是 Although the gap between affluence and poverty still exists, more and more people begin to pay attention to this problem and make use of(employ) various approaches  to solve it, as the numerous sustentation funds from developed countries to developing countries every year. All these improvements show evidence that humanity is improving.

The main reason(理由?不好) of the improvement of humanity is that people have more time(为什么更多时间) to consider questions and defects existing in the humanity, and then continuously review these defects in order to make them better than ever. Especially after the Second Industry Revolution, technological innovations [U]brought productivity increased [/U](直接increase)  in(to?) a large extent, (and)general educations became popular and ordinary people have rights to be educated. With the increasing of productivity, [U]which is one reason for the improvement of humanity,[/U](删)  people gain more leisure time to consider problems in humanity.(到这里才解释为什么是more time 我累啊~~) However, considering humanity is hard to realize in ancient times since people took care of how to solve problems about survival, rather than humanity. 前面已经提了education了这里又来一遍The popularization of education is another reason for the improvement of humanity. Education, especially modern education, emphasizes on the moral construction. In China, students have lessons about philosophy, an important lesson imparting humanity and helping students to establish correct worldviews, from elementary schools to universities. Both the increasing of productivity and popularization of education are results of technological innovations. Therefore, technology development is a crucial reason promoting the improvement of humanity.
更多的精力 和 更多的教育 两个方面两次转换 论证不清晰

If there were no improvement of humanity, the world would have been hard to imagine. A drastic discussion about whether government should admit the research of human clone is ended with the winning of restriction of this technology. Why does this conclusion draw though the technology of clone surely could solve many problems? It is humanity that requires the natural order about the human multiplication which has been threaten by clone in that some evil scientists could use it to produce human and make many troubles in the society. As a result, the society is advancing with the improvement of technologies and humanity.(人性的必要性??)这是走题啊

Although there are still some immoral conducts in ordinary lives, such as the existing wars, violence and poverty, through our ceaseless conscious efforts as well as our firm belief in mutual respect and tolerance can we essentially improve human conditions, bringing about a world of mutual compassion, sympathy and consideration for humans and animals. (528 words)

issue是让我们讨论科技对人性的影响 既然你是disagree的 就应该论证人性如何进步了 科技又是怎样的角色

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发表于 2004-3-28 11:28:21 |只看该作者
melissa 不要着急哦~~~
我都两天没写了~~~写不出来~~
不要强逼自己写~~~调整一下~~
别再搜我帖子了

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发表于 2004-3-28 11:33:39 |只看该作者
同意楼上的说~~
质量有滑坡哦

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Gemini双子座 荣誉版主

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发表于 2004-3-28 11:36:49 |只看该作者
好的
谢谢各位,我先换换脑子去
一会回来看大家的评语
谢谢!
爱情无需刻意去把握,越是想紧紧地抓牢自己的爱情,反而容易失去自我,失去原则,失去彼此之间本来应该保持的宽容和谅解,爱情也会因此而变的毫无美感。
每个人都希望自己拥有幸福美满的婚姻和爱情,但是爱是需要能力的,这个能力就是让你爱的人爱你。

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发表于 2004-3-28 12:05:00 |只看该作者
疑问:饥饿算人性的缺陷吗?

回答:算,题目就提到了poverty
"It is difficult to understand something when your salary depends on your not understanding it." --- Upton Sinclair

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发表于 2004-3-28 12:16:04 |只看该作者
如果从War, violence and poverty 上来分析 Humanity,这个Humanity 可能并不是中文翻译的“人性”这么简单。中文英文单词往往不是那么容易对照和翻译的。特别是大多数国人在Humanity 这一点上做得并不好。自然就没有深层次的理解。

另外,我不赞成使用“伊拉克战争”作为反面例子,因为这个的争论太大。而且绝大多数美国人认为这个是正义的战争。还不如用“Sept. 11”。
"It is difficult to understand something when your salary depends on your not understanding it." --- Upton Sinclair

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发表于 2004-3-28 12:26:34 |只看该作者

humanity

Main Entry:humanity
Pronunciation:hy*-*ma-n*-t*, y*-
Function:noun
Inflected Form: plural -ties
Date:14th century

1 : the quality or state of being humane
2 a : the quality or state of being human  b plural   : human attributes or qualities *his work has the ripeness of the 18th century, and its rough humanities Pamela H. Johnson*
3 plural   : the branches of learning (as philosophy, arts, or languages) that investigate human constructs and concerns as opposed to natural processes (as in physics or chemistry) and social relations (as in anthropology or economics)
4 : MANKIND 1

Main Entry:mankind
Function:noun singular but singular or plural in construction
Date:13th century

1 \*man-*k*nd, -*k*nd\  : the human race : the totality of human beings
2 \-*k*nd\  : men especially as distinguished from women

以上是wm电子版~~~~~的解释~~~~

然后查了麦克米伦美语版~~~
只有一条是合适的:a kind and sympathetic attitude toward other people esp. when they are suffering in some way

朗文英英:也是类似的一条,指同情心之类的~~~~~

humanity的含义真得那么广吗???
别再搜我帖子了

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发表于 2004-3-28 12:33:22 |只看该作者
我觉得"a kind and sympathetic attitude toward other people esp. when they are suffering in some way"这个解释非常好。其实包含的范围也很广,对各种弱者的同情心也包括在里面。并不是“人性”这个词义那么简单。
"It is difficult to understand something when your salary depends on your not understanding it." --- Upton Sinclair

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发表于 2004-3-28 12:36:06 |只看该作者
谢谢fishergirl!

最初由 fishergirl 发布
疑问:饥饿算人性的缺陷吗?

说不好,不过既然题目中提级了poverty,我就顺着说下来了

现象:人性确实进步了。不过伊拉克战争的例子好像不太好,这场战争正是人性阴暗面的反映――打着正义的幌子,行强取豪夺之事。

我不是说这场战争,而是在说这场之前的反战运动,反对战争,崇尚和平,用以说明人性的提高。

进一步展开,论述如果人性没有进步,社会会怎样。说实话,我觉得这里举个例子不如分析几句。

唉,说实在的,是实在分析不出来,没办法啊
而且上一段一直在说理,也应该用一点例子了

你的提纲我看了,观点无所谓的,只要能够自圆其说即可

谢谢你!
爱情无需刻意去把握,越是想紧紧地抓牢自己的爱情,反而容易失去自我,失去原则,失去彼此之间本来应该保持的宽容和谅解,爱情也会因此而变的毫无美感。
每个人都希望自己拥有幸福美满的婚姻和爱情,但是爱是需要能力的,这个能力就是让你爱的人爱你。

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发表于 2004-3-28 12:36:49 |只看该作者
请教lionel前辈
既然humanity指的是对别人的一种情绪,那么饥饿还算在内吧?不算了吧~~~

还有题目中的poverty~~
我理解的是:世界上富有的人很多,但是仍存在贫穷,是因为富有的人没能去奉献
饥饿也是类似,大部分人不饥饿,人们没能去帮助饥饿的人

而不能单纯的说饥饿这种现象属于人性的阴暗面
别再搜我帖子了

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RE: issue114 又一次限时失败,受挫折中 [修改]

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