issue144, 机井高频,马上就要考了,谢谢拍砖

sniper613UID: 147372

Issue144"It is the artist, not the critic,* who gives society something of lasting value."
*a person who evaluates works of art, such as novels, films, music, paintings, etc.

Many artists in the world have created a large number of artic works, some of which have lasting value. Critics evaluate works of art, such as novels, films, music, paintings. However, sometimes critics cannot present all people's opinions. But critics can help artists improve their works.


In the first place, many artists in history have created a lot of works, which have influenced ordinary persons. In the history many artic works were created by lots of artists. For example, in the Renaissance, Da Vince created many famous paintings, such as Mona Lisa, The Last Supper, and so on. These paintings have great influence on the other artists after Da Vince. Another example is Beethoven, who was one of the most famous musicians in the world. The Symphony No.5, which was created by Beethoven, encouraged a large number of people in nearly all countries. When people listen to music, they are encouraged to fight with the difficulties and determine their own livings. These artic works have great influence on other people and they are still respected by persons now. Thus, artists created many artic works and these works are so influent on other individuals.


In addition, sometimes critics cannot present all people's opinions and they might give opposite evaluation to some artic works. It is a common sense that critics usually express their own views, and sometimes these opinions are not right. Take the artic works created by Van Gogh as an example. When the paintings came to the world, many critics hold the views that these works were out of reality and the comment could not be understood. They did not think that the works were good for people. But after a few years, most people realized the true evaluation of Van Gogh's artic works. Under this situation, it is not difficult to see that sometimes critics only express their own views and might give wrong evaluation to some artic works. As a consequence, sometimes most people's opinions cannot be presented by critics and critics might wrongly evaluate some works.


Moreover, critics can give proper evaluation to some artists and help them improve their works. Though sometimes critics might give wrong evaluations to some artic works, in the modern time artists can rightly realize the criticism from critics and improve their works. In order to understand the gist of the statement, it is necessary to see an example. Zhou Jielun, who is one of the most popular singers in Hong Kong. When he produced his first record, many critics not only evaluated the quality of the record but also gave many advices to him. Zhou Jielun adopted some of these suggestions and improved his following records. Now his records sell well in the area of Asia and many people enjoy his songs. For the example, it is easy to see that the success of an artist cannot be separated from the work of critics. Therefore, artists can improve their works with the help of critics.


To sum up, a great deal of artic works have been created by many artists in the world. And critics give evaluation to these works and artists. Sometimes critics may not realize the real evaluation of some works, but artists can make progress by recognizing the criticism from some critics.（545words）

tinyscintillaUID: 150098

Issue144"It is the artist, not the critic,* who gives society something of lasting value."
*a person who evaluates works of art, such as novels, films, music, paintings, etc.

Many artists in the world have created a large number of artic works, some of which have lasting value. Critics evaluate works of art, such as novels, films, music, paintings. However,我觉得用Admittedly更好,因为however是强调紧接着的一句,而admittedly是否认这一句,我感觉你的文章的中心思想是:虽然批评家有时会给错误意见,但他们还是有作用的.sometimes critics cannot present all people's opinions. But critics can help artists improve their works.


In the first place, many artists in history have created a lot of works, which have influenced ordinary persons. In the history many artic works were created by lots of artists. For example, in the Renaissance, Da VinceDa Vincicreated many famous paintings, such as Mona Lisa, The Last Supper, and so on. These paintings have great influence on the other artists after Da Vince. Another example is Beethoven, who was one of the most famous musicians in the world. The Symphony No.5, which was created by Beethoven, encouraged a large number of people in nearly all countries. When people listen to music, they are encouraged to fight with the difficulties and determine their own livings. These artic works have great influence on other people and they are still respected by persons now. Thus, artists created many artic works and these works are so influent on other individuals.两个例子都是从同一个角度分析同一个问题,我觉得一个就够了,我想篇文章是将批评家与著作的关系,那么你不要撇开批评家不说,你可以在中心句中强调,即使没有批评家,作品本身的魅力也足够吸引观众.


In addition, sometimes critics cannot present all people's opinions and they might give opposite evaluation to some artic works. It is a common sense that critics usually express their own views, and sometimes these opinions are not right. Take the artic works created by Van Gogh as an example. When the paintings came to the world, many critics hold the views that these works were out of reality and the comment could not be understood. They did not think that the works were good for people. But after a few years, most people realized the true evaluation of Van Gogh's artic works. Under this situation, it is not difficult to see that sometimes critics only express their own views and might give wrong evaluation to some artic works. As a consequence, sometimes most people's opinions cannot be presented by critics and critics might wrongly evaluate some works.这一段跟开头段的问题一样,我觉得还是用,admittedly更好,表明你看到了批评家的缺陷所在,最好把它调到第四段


Moreover我觉得用however 更好, critics can give proper evaluation to some artists and help them improve their works. Though sometimes critics might give wrong evaluations to some artic works, in the modern time artists can rightly realize the criticism from critics and improve their works. In order to understand the gist of the statement, it is necessary to see an example. Zhou Jielun, who is one of the most popular singers in Hong Kong. 句子不完整When he produced his first record, many critics not only evaluated the quality of the record but also gave many advices to him. Zhou Jielun adopted some of these suggestions and improved his following records. Now his records sell well in the area of Asia and many people enjoy his songs. For Fromthe example, it is easy to see that the success of an artist cannot be separated from the work of critics. 我觉得有点中国英语,不如改成Some of the artists benefit from the comments of critics. Therefore, artists can improve their works with the help of critics.


To sum up, a great deal of artic works have been created by many artists in the world. And critics give evaluation to these works and artists. Sometimes critics may not realize the real evaluation of some works, Issue144"It is the artist, not the critic,* who gives society something of lasting value."
*a person who evaluates works of art, such as novels, films, music, paintings, etc.

Many artists in the world have created a large number of artic works, some of which have lasting value. Critics evaluate works of art, such as novels, films, music, paintings. However,我觉得用Admittedly更好,因为however是强调紧接着的一句,而admittedly是否认这一句,我感觉你的文章的中心思想是:虽然批评家有时会给错误意见,但他们还是有作用的.sometimes critics cannot present all people's opinions. But critics can help artists improve their works.


In the first place, many artists in history have created a lot of works, which have influenced ordinary persons. In the history many artic works were created by lots of artists. For example, in the Renaissance, Da VinceDa Vincicreated many famous paintings, such as Mona Lisa, The Last Supper, and so on. These paintings have great influence on the other artists after Da Vince. Another example is Beethoven, who was one of the most famous musicians in the world. The Symphony No.5, which was created by Beethoven, encouraged a large number of people in nearly all countries. When people listen to music, they are encouraged to fight with the difficulties and determine their own livings. These artic works have great influence on other people and they are still respected by persons now. Thus, artists created many artic works and these works are so influent on other individuals.两个例子都是从同一个角度分析同一个问题,我觉得一个就够了,我想篇文章是将批评家与著作的关系,那么你不要撇开批评家不说,你可以在中心句中强调,即使没有批评家,作品本身的魅力也足够吸引观众.


In addition, sometimes critics cannot present all people's opinions and they might give opposite evaluation to some artic works. It is a common sense that critics usually express their own views, and sometimes these opinions are not right. Take the artic works created by Van Gogh as an example. When the paintings came to the world, many critics hold the views that these works were out of reality and the comment could not be understood. They did not think that the works were good for people. But after a few years, most people realized the true evaluation of Van Gogh's artic works. Under this situation, it is not difficult to see that sometimes critics only express their own views and might give wrong evaluation to some artic works. As a consequence, sometimes most people's opinions cannot be presented by critics and critics might wrongly evaluate some works.这一段跟开头段的问题一样,我觉得还是用,admittedly更好,表明你看到了批评家的缺陷所在,最好把它调到第四段


Moreover我觉得用however 更好, critics can give proper evaluation to some artists and help them improve their works. Though sometimes critics might give wrong evaluations to some artic works, in the modern time artists can rightly realize the criticism from critics and improve their works. In order to understand the gist of the statement, it is necessary to see an example. Zhou Jielun, who is one of the most popular singers in Hong Kong. 句子不完整When he produced his first record, many critics not only evaluated the quality of the record but also gave many advices to him. Zhou Jielun adopted some of these suggestions and improved his following records. Now his records sell well in the area of Asia and many people enjoy his songs. For Fromthe example, it is easy to see that the success of an artist cannot be separated from the work of critics. 我觉得有点中国英语,不如改成Some of the artists benefit from the comments of critics. Therefore, artists can improve their works with the help of critics.


To sum up, a great deal of artic works have been created by many artists in the world. And critics give evaluation to these works and artists. Sometimes critics may not realize the real evaluation of some works, but artists can make progress by recognizing the criticism from some critics.（545words）
文章给人总体结构很清晰,语言也不错,不过论证重点我觉得可以调整一下,呵呵,个人观点,听听其他人的意见吧.
有空看看我的吧https://bbs.gter.net/showthread.php?s=&threadid=178067

lovebrianUID: 157127

Issue144"It is the artist, not the critic,* who gives society something of lasting value."
*a person who evaluates works of art, such as novels, films, music, paintings, etc.

Many artists in the world have created a large number of artic works, some of which have lasting value. Critics evaluate works of art, such as novels, films, music, paintings. However, sometimes critics cannot present all people's opinions. But critics can help artists improve their works.感觉thesis有点散~


In the first place, many artists in history have created a lot of works, which have influenced ordinary persons. In the history many artic works were created by lots of artists. For example, in the Renaissance, Da Vince created many famous paintings, such as Mona Lisa, The Last Supper, and so on. These paintings have great influence on the other artists after Da Vince. Another example is Beethoven, who was one of the most famous musicians in the world. The Symphony No.5, which was created by Beethoven, encouraged a large number of people in nearly all countries. When people listen to music, they are encouraged to fight with the difficulties and determine their own livings. These artic works have great influence on other people and they are still respected by persons now. Thus, artists created many artic works and these works are so influent on other individuals.结构很清晰，例子可以说的透一点，具体一点    主要说了艺术作品本身的意义


In addition, sometimes critics cannot present all people's opinions and they might give opposite evaluation to some artic works感觉这段根前面衔接不好. It is a common sense that critics usually express their own views, and sometimes these opinions are not right. Take the artic works created by Van Gogh as an example. When the paintings came to the world, many critics hold the views that these works were out of reality and the comment could not be understood. They did not think that the works were good for people. But after a few years, most people realized the true evaluation of Van Gogh's artic works. Under this situation, it is not difficult to see that sometimes critics only express their own views and might give wrong evaluation to some artic works. As a consequence, sometimes most people's opinions cannot be presented by critics and critics might wrongly evaluate some works.批评家的评论时常错误，导致不能代表大众——这个扯得有点远~虽然thesis提到了~~但是文章似乎没必要涉及到这个话题，或者不是直接涉及到 it is beside the point a bit


Moreover, critics can give proper evaluation to some artists and help them improve their works. 个人感觉应该放到body2Though sometimes critics might give wrong evaluations to some artic works, in the modern time artists can rightly realize the criticism from critics and improve their works. In order to understand the gist of the statement, it is necessary to see an example. Zhou Jielun, who is one of the most popular singers in Hong Kong. When he produced his first record, many critics not only evaluated the quality of the record but also gave many advices to him. Zhou Jielun adopted some of these suggestions and improved his following records. Now his records sell well in the area of Asia and many people enjoy his songs. For the example, it is easy to see that the success of an artist cannot be separated from the work of critics. Therefore, artists can improve their works with the help of critics.自圆其说了~~~


To sum up, a great deal of artic works have been created by many artists in the world. And critics give evaluation to these works and artists. Sometimes critics may not realize the real evaluation of some works, but artists can make progress by recognizing the criticism from some critics.（545words）

感觉找的点不太好~~批评家的作用恐怕不是这么小~~针对面也不仅仅是艺术家~~~而是应该起到一定的宣传作用~~宣传作用当然不一定是负面的~~body2可以有个反面可以说
那么究竟是艺术，还是批评家给社会作贡献呢？没说清楚，尤其是批评家，没有往这个社会贡献上说

PasterUID: 158653

Issue144"It is the artist, not the critic,* who gives society something of lasting value."
*a person who evaluates works of art, such as novels, films, music, paintings, etc.

Many artists in the world have created a large number of artic works, some of which have lasting value. Critics evaluate works of art, such as novels, films, music, paintings. However, sometimes critics cannot present（[B]represent[/B] ） all people's opinions. But critics can help artists improve their works.([B]critics能否give society something of lasting value?)[/B]

In the first place, many artists in history have created a lot of works, which have influenced ordinary persons. In the history many artic works were created by lots of artists. For example, in the Renaissance, Da Vince created many famous paintings, such as Mona Lisa, The Last Supper, and so on. These paintings have great influence on the other artists after Da Vince. Another example is Beethoven, who was one of the most famous musicians in the world. The Symphony No.5, which was created by Beethoven, encouraged a large number of people in nearly all countries. When people listen to music, they are encouraged to fight with the difficulties and determine their own livings.([B]别扭 换一下[/B] ) These artic works have great influence on other people （repeating）and they are still respected by persons now. Thus, artists created many artic works and these works are so influent on other individuals.（[B]多余[/B] ）



In addition, sometimes critics cannot present all people's opinions and they might give opposite evaluation to some artic works. It is a common sense that critics usually express their own views, and sometimes these opinions are not right. Take the artic works created by Van Gogh as an example. When the paintings came to the world, many critics hold the views that these works were out of reality and the comment （could not be understood. They did not think that the works were good for people. But after a few years, most people realized the true evaluation of Van Gogh's artic works. Under this situation, it is not difficult to see that sometimes critics only express their own views and might give wrong evaluation to some artic works. As a consequence, sometimes most people's opinions cannot be presented（ by critics and critics might wrongly evaluate some works.（

Moreover, critics can give proper evaluation to some artists and help them improve their works. Though sometimes critics might give wrong evaluations to some artic works（）, in the modern time artists can rightly realize the criticism from critics and improve their works. In order to understand the gist of the statement, it is necessary to see an example. Zhou Jielun, who is one of the most popular singers in Hong Kong. When he produced his first record, many critics not only evaluated the quality of the record but also gave many advices to him. Zhou Jielun adopted some of these suggestions and improved his following records. Now his records sell well in the area of Asia and many people enjoy his songs. For the example, it is easy to see that the success of an artist cannot be separated from the work of critics. Therefore, artists can improve their works with the help of critics.（

To sum up, a great deal of artic works have been created by many artists in the world. And critics give evaluation to these works and artists. Sometimes critics may not realize the real evaluation of some works, but artists can make progress by recognizing the criticism from some critics.（545words）
[B]比我写的好多了 我目前还没写出这么多呢…..
语言 用词上再加把劲….
我们一起加油哦[/B]

sniper613UID: 147372

谢谢tinyscintilla
是的，段落顺序得换一换。把第三段和第四段换一下。
连接词也有些问题，我当时在pp3里写的，来不及想这么多。你的意见很好，谢谢

sniper613UID: 147372

谢谢狒狒
我们的时间不多了，今天我的一个朋友到济南考去了，我觉得我们也应该磨刀赫赫向ETS
承认我的文章里没有把critic和value联系起来，看来主题句得改改了

sniper613UID: 147372

谢谢Paster
词语的问题我现在就是没有办法，写作文的时间太紧，没有时间思考啊