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[作文] 【独立写作】雷诺作业贴(12.13) [复制链接]

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发表于 2014-11-27 08:57:48 |只看该作者
Minnieee 发表于 2014-11-27 03:58
又分到一组了还是看不到你的作文不好意思能复制粘贴吗谢谢啦!

Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? Patience is usually not good strategy. We should take action now rather than later.

As the rapid pace of the modern society, a great number of people claims that we should take action as soon as possible, while some hold the different opinion, they think patience is usually a good strategy. I totally agree with the idea that we need patience if we want to success.
Patience can access to success. We should do the right thing in the right time. As an old Chinese saying says “Good opportunity, favorable geographical location and the support from people are the necessary prerequisites of success”. Sometimes the surrounding conditions are not fit for us to do something, we need to wait until the right time is coming. Before I entered the college, I wanted to make money reducing my parents’ burden. So when I graduated from high school, I went to work, however, as I didn’t have the professional knowledge and special experience, I just found some jobs which made the least money and did the heaviest work. I realized that it was not the time I should go to work, so I entered into the college, studied hard, and when I graduated from college, I found that I could find a job much better than before. Another obvious example is Buffett, one of the richest men all over the world, he always could get the revenue after many years he invested the stock market. It is the patience leads to his success.
Besides, patience may be the most time-saving strategy. Just people say “Right direction is more important than hardworking.” If you do not know how to make a crucial decision, you should wait until the direction is clear. Hastily taking action may lead to the wrong decision, you need spend time to do it again. My friends John, when he chose the major of the college, he hastily chose the material science major, just because it sounded cool. After one years’ study, he found it was a wrong decision, so he changed his major, but he would graduate later one year than us. If John spent more time on asking someone else, searching the information he would save the one year time.
Admittedly, taking action as soon as possible may be efficient sometimes, it also may lead to success accidently. However, if we want to save time in a long term and if we want to success all the time we need patience.

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发表于 2014-11-28 00:06:38 |只看该作者
加油!

11.26独立写作 已改~.doc

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发表于 2014-12-3 15:56:53 |只看该作者
Hi 不好意思,我晚上9点半之后才能帮你批改,抱歉啊

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发表于 2014-12-3 20:42:14 |只看该作者
12.2作业shilei165 re by R.docx (13.96 KB, 下载次数: 1)

改好了~~:handshake

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发表于 2014-12-5 05:38:28 |只看该作者
已改12.3号~

11.3dulixiezuo.doc

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发表于 2014-12-6 09:41:59 |只看该作者
it's ok!!
12.5作业shilei.docx (16.15 KB, 下载次数: 2)

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2015 US-applicant

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发表于 2014-12-7 13:53:54 |只看该作者
改好啦!

12.6 shilei作业 by浅蓝&深蓝.docx

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发表于 2014-12-7 15:14:42 |只看该作者
浅蓝&深蓝 发表于 2014-12-7 13:53
改好啦!

看到啦,帮助很大,尤其是主语要用客观人称还有句子连接问题,多谢多谢!

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发表于 2014-12-7 15:34:22 |只看该作者
已改 12.6 shilei-Revised by bethirty.docx (16.75 KB, 下载次数: 1)

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发表于 2014-12-8 02:28:45 |只看该作者
这么晚了。。不好意思

12.5 综合 review by Minnie.doc

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发表于 2014-12-9 20:23:43 |只看该作者
改好啦 抱歉晚了

12.7作业shilei.docx

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发表于 2014-12-12 00:59:02 |只看该作者
写的挺好的,可以看出LZ的逻辑思维很棒,如果能更详实一些就更好了,这样20分?独立fair吗?感觉不会啊,可能是你写的字数有点少,加油!
12.10作业shilei--revised.docx (16.76 KB, 下载次数: 2)

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发表于 2015-1-18 14:02:36 |只看该作者
1.17已改~~

雷诺1.17作文已改.docx

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发表于 2015-1-18 15:39:50 |只看该作者
本帖最后由 flyccl 于 2015-1-18 15:48 编辑

1.17已改  
无论是语言表达还是结构都写的不错 怎么会20呢 是不是词汇方面还不够深度?
可以交流下!

雷诺1.17作文--RW by flyccl.docx

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发表于 2015-1-18 18:37:00 |只看该作者
flyccl 发表于 2015-1-18 15:39
1.17已改  
无论是语言表达还是结构都写的不错 怎么会20呢 是不是词汇方面还不够深度?
可以交流下!

可能是论证的力度不够吧。感觉你也有同样的问题。深度和广度都不够。

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RE: 【独立写作】雷诺作业贴(12.13) [修改]

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