jingyuege1的作文练习帖

jingyuege1UID: 3598309

7.15  ISSUE13
13) Universities should require every student to take a variety of courses outside the student's field of study.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim. In developing and supporting your position, be sure to address the most compelling reasons and/or examples that could be used to challenge your position.

1.        学习其他专业的课程能促进本专业的学习
2.        学习其他专业课程能培养更全面的CITIZENSHIP
3.        挑战，未来的工作


In today’s competitive world, people who grasp knowledge of a single field may not meet the requirement of complex jobs. Versatile employees are more preferable to companies. 过渡与衔接 More and more universities require every student to take a variety of courses outside the student’s field of study. Some people disapprove this requirement for it is not useful to learn these courses which have no apparent benefit to the student’s future job. However, I agree with this requirement. Taking a variety of courses outside the original study field may promote one’s academic study, develop citizenship and obtain skills for future career.

Versatile employees 搭配 agree with this requirement 搭配
obtain和前面主语搭配有问题

To begin with, taking courses outside one’s original major can help the students learn their own majors more effectively by gaining different perspectives. Take students in dance as as example. By learning courses in phycology, they will know what people will do and how they will react under different circumstances, 断句this will help them to deeply understand the role which they will act. And when they are dancing, they will also know how to arouse the audience’s sympathy through learning phycology. So taking courses outside one’s own major will surely help them with learning their own field better.

gaining different perspectives搭配
phycology-拼写  
这个例子不太好 跳舞与心理学 你对这两个领域都没有足够的干货来支撑你的论证
而且dance不是常规意义上的学科   
选例子的首要原则是要自己熟悉


Moreover, courses in other fields can also help students become more responsible citizens who are able to make informed decisions on social issues.
Students in arts and politics, by learning technology and science, they will gain knowledge on how our life become so advanced and convenient, and what they should do when science confront with ethnic. Math and mechanical majors can understand different political issues by taking courses in political science, history and economic. Our society need well-educated and responsible citizens to operate efficiently. So learning course’s out of one’s own major will help them to become a better citizen.

Students in arts and politics, by learning technology and science, they will gain knowledge 句子结构问题
science confront with ethnic. 不懂
mechanical majors  没有这个major
例子和citizenship之间关系不够紧密


Some people hold the opposite view that such courses are not beneficial for the students’ future jobs, and should not be required to take. In my point, many courses outside one’s major can also be helpful for their future careers. Taking courses in computer science will help the economic students know how to establish database and models,断句 this is an essential skill When they handle a work with lots of data. Learning a third language or even more, can promote the students’ communication skills, 断句 it is very useful for any work they may take. Thus it is also beneficial for students' future careers to take  courses outsides of majors.

should not be required to take 这个句子的主语是 courses 不是students
In my point- opinion




In conclusion, In  conclusion, it is helpful for students' academic study, development of  citizenship and careers by taking a variety courses outsides fields of study.

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85) In a study of the reading habits of Waymarsh citizens conducted by the University of Waymarsh, most respondents said that they preferred literary classics as reading material. However, a second study conducted by the same researchers found that the type of book most frequently checked out of each of the public libraries in Waymarsh was the mystery novel. Therefore, it can be concluded that the respondents in the first study had misrepresented their reading habits.

Write a response in which you discuss what specific evidence is needed to evaluate the argument and explain how the evidence would weaken or strengthen the argument.


In this study, most respondents said that they preferred literary classics, while researchers found mystery novel was the type which was more frequently checked out. Therefore, the researchers concluded that the respondents in the first study had misrepresented their reading habits. However, we need more evidence about the library records, the Waymarsh citizens’ reading habits and details of the first study to evaluate this argument.

　感觉有进步啊！！！
是不是写的时候小心一些了呢？  
花了多少时间


To begin with, we need more information about records of the public libraries. If the collections of literary classics are far less than that of mystery novel, readers can only check out mystery novels under the circumstance that the literary classics are unavailable. It is possible that literary classics are prohibited from checking out, so people are limited to read such books in rooms of public libraries. Meanwhile, people may prefer reading literary classics in the reading rooms instead of checking them out.

collection - less 搭配
literary classics are for library use only
最后要点一下题  这些信息对argument有什么影响



Moreover, we have to deeply dig into the Waymarsh citizens’ reading habits. The second study was conducted in public libraries only. However, maybe only a small range of people choose to read literary classics in public libraries. Many Waymarsh people could buy literary classics from bookstores or online shopping center such as Amazon or TAOBAO. There are also abundant free literary classics resources shared on the internet, so people would like to download such e-books to read on their cellphones or personal computers. So we have to know more about the reading habits of literary classics of Waymash people.

Taobao- eBay
would like to - could




Finally, we need to know more details of the first study. If this study was conducted in high school or university, then the people who were investigated were almost young people who preferred to reading literary classics. Thus, the older people’s reading habits were not considered. In addition, contents in the questionnaire should be examined. If the respondents were not given the choice of mystery novel, it was not suitable to conclude that they misrepresent their reading habits.

在开始提出其他可能性之前要先概括一下 know more about the sampling method and the questionnaire design
要注意hedging



In conclusion, to evaluate whether Waymarsh citizen misrepresented their reading habits or not, we need more evidence about the library records, the Waymarsh citizens’ reading habits and details of the first study.

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91) The primary goal of technological advancement should be to increase people's efficiency so that they have more leisure time.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.  

I agree that the primary goal of technological advancement should be to increase people’s efficiency. However, whether this advancement will lead to more leisure time depends on the role people play in society and the goal of their life.

goal和life都要复数  



To begin with, as to college students and researchers, computers and internet do increase their efficiency, but they actually do not have more leisure time since they have more things to learn. By accessing to school’s e-library, students and researchers can get abundant articles and thesis easily with out going to the real library. Such development increased the efficiency of looking up for academic resources. However, students and researchers do not have more leisure time compared with earlier time. In fact, they gain much more pressure on learning. College students are taking more courses. Besides traditional courses taught in class, they take more courses on the website. Professors and researchers have to read and learn lots of academic thesis and scholarly works in digital forms in order to keep up with pace of time. So the primary goal of technological advanced students and researchers’ efficiency, but didn’t increase their leisure time.

technologies such as computers and the Internet
gain much more pressure 搭配  
read and learn lots of academic thesis 搭配
So the primary goal of technological advanced students and researchers’ efficiency, but didn’t increase their leisure time. goal- advance-efficiency搭配  
goal - increase -time 搭配  



Moreover, for white-collar workers and businessman can also work more efficiently due to technological advancement, while they seem to have less leisure time than before. With wireless phones, businessman can receive a call from his colleagues or business cooperators at any time and any where. With computers and internet, businessman can deal with business affairs both at office and home. So both cellphones and computers increased their working efficiency, but it also blurred the boundary between work and rest. They even sacrifice their own leisure time on teleconference or preparing business protocols. So this advance in technology doesn’t increase their leisure time.


for white-collar workers and businessman can also work more efficiently非常严重的语法错误



我觉得思路好像有一点不太正确，等老师出了新的范文我再补全吧~先写到这里！

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7.21 ARGUMENT54
54) Humans arrived in the Kaliko Islands about 7,000 years ago, and within 3,000 years most of the large mammal species that had lived in the forests of the Kaliko Islands had become extinct. Yet humans cannot have been a factor in the species' extinctions, because there is no evidence that the humans had any significant contact with the mammals. Further, archaeologists have discovered numerous sites where the bones of fish had been discarded, but they found no such areas containing the bones of large mammals, so the humans cannot have hunted the mammals. Therefore, some climate change or other environmental factor must have caused the species' extinctions.

Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.

In this argument, the author concludes that the large mammals’ extinction was due to some climate change or environmental factor. However, the assumptions about contact between humans and mammal species, archeologists’ investigation, and climate or environmental factors should be examined in order to evaluate this argument.

To begin with, it is assumed that there is no evidence of significant contact between humans and mammals, so humans were not a factor of the species’ extinctions. Tough researchers didn’t find any evidence, they can not assert the contact was never existed.  Since the possible contact would have occurred from 7000 years ago to 4000 years ago, many traces left for the contact might have disappeared during such a long period of time.  For example, humans could have hunt the mammals by traps and other implements, 断句  however, due to thousands of years’ geological change, such traps would not be found by any archaeologist. Without material for recording, stories of such contact would hardly to keep. So we can’t simply assume there is no such contact because no evidence was found yet.

assumption要强调推理关系
was never existed 语法
tough- though
断句
stories of such contact would hardly to keep.句子结构




Moreover, it is assumed that humans cannot have hunted the mammals because archaeologist didn’t found bones of mammals in sites where bones of fish were discarded. It is possible that humans hunted and killed mammals, and they made use of the bones for some religious ritual or making tools rather than directly discarded them. And maybe the bones were discarded in some other places that the archaeologist has not discovered yet.

didn't found 语法
rather than 后面要跟动名词


Finally, the author assumed that mammals’ extinction in Kailiko Island must be caused by climate change or other environmental factors, which precluded the possibility of human behaviors. However, many human behaviors would lead to such extinction. For instance, when people migrate to Kailiko Island from outside, they could have brought some pestilent disease which could extinct these large mammals. Or due to the natural resources such as trees or plants which the mammals lived on were deprived by humans, the amount of mammals would decrease sharply.

这里假设的概括还是有问题
due to后面句子结构不对  


In conclusion, we need to examine the assumptions about contact between humans and mammal species, archeologists’ investigation, and climate or environmental factors. If these assumptions do not hold true, so do the argument.

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6月29日 ISSUE78
People's attitudes are determined more by their immediate situation or surroundings than by society as a whole.

Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider ways in which the statement might or might not hold true and explain how these considerations shape your position.

Society as a whole, immediate situation and surroundings are factors that will impact people’s attitudes. In this issue, it points out that immediate situation or surroundings are more powerful element in shaping people’s attitudes. However, I don’t agree with this statement. In my opinion, people’s attitudes are determined by society through education, media, and political policies which even determine the situation and surroundings of people.

issue statement
the author points out ...


To begin with, people’s attitudes are determined by society through education. Education is the fundamental resource for establishing people’s attitudes from their beginning of gaining knowledge. For example, in childhood, people are taught to be in favor of helping others who are in trouble, hence determined this attitude. The Red-Cross association, all kinds of foundations, as well as some donation activities are all under the attitude of helping people. Because people are educated by school and society, they are able to gain such attitude to affect others.

education- resource 搭配 institution好些  
hence determined this attitude这个动词的主语在哪里？ 整句的结构有问题
The Red-Cross association, all kinds of foundations, as well as some donation activities are all under the attitude of helping people. 整句话的结构 表达  
gain such attitude搭配


Moreover, people’s attitudes are also determined by the society through mass media. Media such as advertisement in TV, magazines, newspapers which occupy a big part of individual’s daily life has a great effect in shaping people’s attitude. For example, in recent years, with advertisement filling every bit of our life, people are more likely to believe that they need all luxurious products and services to be happy. They are so misled that they even believe people’s value can be judged by the price of material they have. Additionally, the society would shape our environment more suitable for shopping. Except for sopping in plaza, there are lots of online shopping center such as E-bay, Amazon. People can buy everything they want just by a click on their mouse, then the item will be delivered right to their house. So the advertising and promotion in media, determines the attitudes wo hold towards consumption.

occupy a big part搭配
judged by the price 搭配 (based on)
shape our environment more suitable 句子结构

我觉得你的语言表达问题相当大  建议你不要写全文了 多花时间模仿范文的句子  

Finally, the society may also influence people’s attitude through government provisions. In recent years, Gay marriages have become increasingly acceptable in America and Europe countries due to the government adopted policies to marriages of gay couple. Despite some disapproval activities from certain social groups, people in these societies have largely changed their attitudes from rejection to acceptance. More and more gay marriages are legally held and they also get best wishes from their family and friends. So the society can influence people’s attitude by government policies.


In sum, people’s attitudes are not determined by their immediate situation or surroundings. However, people’s attitudes are determined by the society as a whole through education, media and government policies, which also shape the social environment.

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Argument 121
The following appeared in a memo from the director of a large group of hospitals.

"In a laboratory study of liquid antibacterial hand soaps, a concentrated solution of UltraClean produced a 40 percent greater reduction in the bacteria population than did the liquid hand soaps currently used in our hospitals. During a subsequent test of UltraClean at our hospital in Workby, that hospital reported significantly fewer cases of patient infection than did any of the other hospitals in our group. Therefore, to prevent serious patient infections, we should supply UltraClean at all hand-washing stations throughout our hospital system.”

Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.



According to this memo from the director of the group of hospital, the UltraClean should be supplied to avoid serious patient infections. This decision was derived from the result of lab study and hospital test. However, the assumptions of lab results, the hospital and patient infection should be examined in order to evaluate this argument.

avoid serious patient infections 题目用的词是 prevent 好吧 感觉这两个词都不好 因为太绝对了  
assumption 不能跟of  只能用about   



To begin with, it is assumed that the lab result of UltraClean can be applied to the hospital directly. Maybe the bacteria in the lab and hospital are different kinds. While UltraClean is 40% more effective than the liquid hand soaps in the lab, it does not follow the same result in the hospital. So, this assumption would be unwarranted if the UltraClear can’t produce the same result in the hospital.

the lab result of UltraClean can be applied to the hospital
the lab result of UltraClean can be applied to predict the performance of the soap in the hospital

are different kinds- are of different kinds
it does not follow the same result in the hospital 搭配
it does not follow that the same result can be obtained in the hospital  


In addition, we have to examine the assumption that the decreased patient infection in Workby was a result of using UltraClean. Maybe the hospital increased the frequency of it’s cleaners’ daily work. It is possible that the hospital used a more effective antiseptic solution. All these factors would contribute to reduce infection of patients. Therefore, this assumption might be unconvincing if the decreased patient infection in Workby was due to other factors other than UltraClean.

主题句写得不错
it's- its
used a more effective antiseptic solution这句话和前面一句的连贯有问题  
contribute to reduce 语法  
Therefore, this assumption might be unconvincing 注意题目的要求是
Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted. 所以你结尾的地方应该写如果假设不对的时候 对论证的影响 而不是以假设是否可信作为落脚点  



Finally, another important assumption is that by supplying UltraClean at all hand-washing stations would prevent serious patient infections. As we all know, there are a great amount and kinds of bacteria in hands and it is not possible to kill all of them through washing hands. If the patients were infected through spit, blood or breath, it would be useless to wash their hands only. In other words, if the serious patient infections were not caused by bacteria in their hands, neither UltraClean nor liquid hand soap would help. Thus, this assumption may not hold true for the reasons above.


by supplying UltraClean at all hand-washing stations would prevent serious patient infections 句子结构

As we all know, there are a great amount and kinds of bacteria in hands and it is not possible to kill all of them through washing hands. If the patients were infected through spit, 这两句话的连贯衔接有问题  


In conclusion, it is difficult to confirm that UltraClean would be more helpful in infection control if we examine assumptions about the lab result, situation in Workby, and the cause of serious patients infection.

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7.27 ISSUE100
100) Colleges and universities should require their students to spend at least one semester studying in a foreign country.
Write a response in which you discuss your views on the policy and explain your reasoning for the position you take. In developing and supporting your position, you should consider the possible consequences of implementing the policy and explain how these consequences shape your position.

Nowadays, companies are more and more likely to hire employees with excellent multi-language skill. So a student with experience of studying abroad would be competent in a job interview. I agree with the statement because studying abroad can promote students’ language skill as well as understandings of their own culture. As for the concern about the cost of studying abroad, exchange programs and scholarships should be offered to eliminate this burden.

注意题目没有要求address potential challenge
你中间第三段也应该回应consider the possible consequences of implementing the policy and explain how these consequences shape your position.


To begin with, students should be required to study abroad so that they can improve the proficiency of foreign language. This policy is effective especially for non-native language speakers. For example, studying in English speaking countries, due to the environment, students will use English as daily language to communicate, to deal with academic and everything around them. So their English skill will be greatly promoted when the semester is over. With such a dominant position in the development of a company, students who have such an advantage will obviously have more chances in future jobs.

non-native language speakers of which language?
due to the (requirement of) environment
skill- promoted搭配
With such a dominant position in the development of a company不懂你的意思  

Moreover, students learning abroad can get a chance to understand the culture of their homeland much deeper. Students studying abroad will often have opportunities to introduce their homeland cultures and customs. So they would be likely to enlarge their limited knowledge by learning more. And they also have to answer questions about their cultures raised by foreign friends. By learning and explaining their homeland culture, one can surely deepen one’s own understanding in this field.

learning abroad - studying abroad 选词
much more deeply 词性
enlarge their limited knowledge 搭配 knowledge of what
这个深入认识本国文化和大学教育的关系在哪里 为什么就要require呢



Finally, students may concern with the cost of studying abroad. It is true that the expense for studying abroad will impose a burden on a student’s family. However, colleges and universities can provide scholarships to reduce this worry. Qualified students can apply for scholarships which can cover the tuition and living cost for studying abroad. So they don’t have to worry about the cost of studying abroad.

这段没有回应题目的要求 you should consider the possible consequences of implementing the policy and explain how these consequences shape your position.


In conclusion, the policy of requiring students to study abroad can promote their foreign language skills as well as their understanding of culture of their homeland. Meanwhile, scholarship should be provided to help students with financial difficulties.

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7.28  Argument 100
100) The following was written as a part of an application for a small-business loan by a group of developers in the city of Monroe.

Jazz music is extremely popular in the city of Monroe: over 100,000 people attended Monroe's annual jazz festival last summer, and the highest-rated radio program in Monroe is 'Jazz Nightly,' which airs every weeknight. Also, a number of well-known jazz musicians own homes in Monroe. Nevertheless, the nearest jazz club is over an hour away. Given the popularity of jazz in Monroe and a recent nationwide study indicating that the typical jazz fan spends close to $1,000 per year on jazz entertainment, a jazz music club in Monroe would be tremendously profitable.

Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted.

In this application of a small-business loan, the developers concluded that a jazz music club in Monroe would be tremendously profitable. However, in order to evaluate this argument, we have to examine the assumptions about the people attended in Monroe’s annual jazz festival, the reason for jazz musicians owning house in Monroe, and the money of jazz fans spending on jazz entertainment.



To begin with, it is assumed that the 100,000 people attended Monroe’s annual jazz festival last summer were all local residents and their favorite radio program was the ‘Jazz Nightly’. However, it is possible that most of the 100,000 people who joined last summer’s festival were tourists rather than local residents. So no one can promise that there would always has such an amount of people in Monroe who like to attend jazz club. In addition, Monroe may only have 2 radio programs, and people prefer ‘Jazz Nightly’ just because it’s less boring. In this case, one can not say Monroe people love ‘Jazz Nightly’. Hence, this assumption may not hold true due to the point listed above.


主题句不合适 这里的假设是 由这两个观察可以断定jazz很popular  
there would always has such an amount of people 句子结构  amount 选词
promise- guarantee 选词
have 2 radio programs - highest一般至少要有三个


Moreover, we have to examine the assumption that many musicians live in Monroe because they own homes there, and people don’t like to waste time going to a jazz club that is over an hour away. Maybe musicians live in Monroe for vacation and they only spend several weeks there in one year. So they may not go to jazz club because they want to have a rest. While the nearest jazz club which is over one hour away, the club may have provided many free shuttle buses exclusively for people who want to go there.

主题句不合适
这里的假设是own home的原因是jazz popular  
后面提到的jazz club nearby最好另外写一段 和前面的连贯衔接有问题  



Finally, another important assumption is that the typical jazz fan spends their money all in the jazz club. However, jazz entertainment is not necessarily equals to having fun in jazz club. The typical jazz fan is also likely to buy jazz CDs or jazz instruments as well as magazines. If these items would not be provided in this new jazz club, the developers would not make such a profit as they presumed.

注意题目中的关键词nationwide  

In conclusion, to evaluate whether this new jazz club in Monroe would be tremendously profitable, we have to examine these assumptions discussed above.

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留楼，补作业！
105) Claim: Imagination is a more valuable asset than experience.
Reason: People who lack experience are free to imagine what is possible without the constraints of established habits and attitudes.
Write a response in which you discuss the extent to which you agree or disagree with the claim and the reason on which that claim is based.

In this statement, it argued that imagination is more valuable that experience because people who lack experience are free to imagine without the constraints of established habits and attitudes. However, I don’t agree with such a view. In routine jobs, experience plays a more important role. As to scientist and artist, experience and imagination are both valuable factors.

factor 选词
这段写得挺好 貌似语言表达有进步哦  你自己感觉呢？  
计时没？  
额啊~我现在都简化语言，差不多40分钟写完，还得提速，因为写的时候老是要纠结！不纠结30分钟肯定能写完！

To begin with, most people in our society are taking routine jobs, which barely rely on imagination. For example, famers rely on natural regulations which also called experience. An experienced farmer knows that paddy rice should be planted in mud with a certain amount of water, while wheat prefer less water than paddy rice. In this case, if the famer grows wheat and paddy rice only by imagine, these plants would not be grow and ripe. Taxi drivers with a bunch of experience would always know how to drive safely and take shortcuts. Thus, people with routine jobs seldom use imagination to deal with jobs.

which also called experience句子结构
by imagine - imagination 不懂
be grow and ripe句子结构



Moreover, the importance of experience is the same with imagination in field of science. It is true that imagination plays a great role in the process of scientists’ thinking new ideas and making inventions, but these ideas and inventions would be quixotic without experience. Before they come up new ideas, they need to read latest thesis posted on science journals or do lots of experiments to know gain the experience of which ways are feasible and which are not.

thesis-  research articles
know gain 句子结构
你好像完全没有回应reason啊



Finally, experience is also a key factor in art. Despite imagination is the most creative way to make a work of art attractive, experience is the fundamental of the work. Even famous musicians have to grasp such an experience about how to compose these notes can they create dulcet music. And even the famous painters have to grasp the experience of how to make colors they want through mixing red, blue and yellow.

Despite imagination is the most creative way用法 Despite the fact that ...
the fundamental词性


In conclusion, we can conclude that experience is also a valuable factor for people in different fields.

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7.30 Argument 34
34) The vice president of human resources at Climpson Industries sent the following recommendation to the company's president. 
"In an effort to improve our employees' productivity, we should implement electronic monitoring of employees' Internet use from their workstations. Employees who use the Internet from their workstations need to be identified and punished if we are to reduce the number of work hours spent on personal or recreational activities, such as shopping or playing games. By installing software to detect employees' Internet use on company computers, we can prevent employees from wasting time, foster a better work ethic at Climpson, and improve our overall profits. " 
"Write a response in which you examine the stated and/or unstated assumptions of the argument. Be sure to explain how the argument depends on these assumptions and what the implications are for the argument if the assumptions prove unwarranted."

花了多长时间？  


The vice president of human resources at Climpson industries recommend to implement electronic monitoring software on company computers to supervise the employees’ using of internet. However, in order to evaluate this argument, we need to look into the assumptions about the relationship between employees’ productivity and the using internet, the purpose of using internet, and the effectiveness of preventing time wasting.  

supervise这个词用的不错
using- use 词性
the using internet- the use of the Interent


To begin, it is assumed that the employees’ productivity will increase by circumscribing the using of internet. If there is a fixed number of work which should be fulfilled in one day, the productivity would not change whether an employee spend 5 or 8hours to finish it. The productivity would even decrease due to consistent heavy work, 断句 so it is necessary to use internet to take a break and relax through listening a music or playing games for a little while. So this assumption may not hold true if the productivity would reduce.

so it is necessary注意hedging
这段内容不靠谱


Moreover, we have to examine the assumption that all the employees are using internet for enjoyment. However, many employees may use the internet for improving work skills or reading Emails form their boss or searching solutions for the problems they encountered during work. In this case, internet plays a positive role in the employee’s daily work. To punish employees who use the internet would produce a counterproductive result and do harm to the productivity.

这段内容也不靠谱  


Finally, another assumption is that the monitor software will effectively prevent employees from wasting time. However, employees would find ways to avoid from being monitored. For example, employees can install a certain anti-monitor software or uninstall the monitor software to protect themselves. Or, they can use smart phones or iPads to get online for recreational activities. Thus, the time wasting by employees could be increased which will cause the overall profit of Climson to reduce. Thus, monitor software would not guarantee a reduce of wasting time in employees.


这段还不错 后面关于smart phone的讨论比较合适  
time wasting - time wasted  动词用法



In conclusion, to evaluate whether implement electronic monitoring software on company computers will improve the overall profit, we have to check the assumptions discussed above.

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8.10 argument 166
166) The following memo appeared in the newsletter of the West Meria Public Health Council.
An innovative treatment has come to our attention that promises to significantly reduce absenteeism in our schools and workplaces. A study reports that in nearby East Meria, where fish consumption is very high, people visit the doctor only once or twice per year for the treatment of colds. This shows that eating a substantial amount of fish can clearly prevent colds. Furthermore, since colds are the reason most frequently given for absences from school and work, attendance levels will improve. Therefore, we recommend the daily use of a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil as a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeism.
Write a response in which you discuss what questions would need to be answered in order to decide whether the recommendation and the argument on which it is based are reasonable. Be sure to explain how the answers to these questions would help to evaluate the recommendation.

In the memo above, it concluded that the daily use of a nutritional supplement of fish oil is a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeism. In order to evaluate this argument, several questions shall be promoted such as why East Meria people visit the doctor infrequently, what is the main reason of the absences from school and work, and what is the effect of eating fish oil.

To begin with, we need to ask why East Meria people visit the doctor infrequently. Maybe the people there cannot afford seeing the doctor and take some OTC medicine for cold, because it’s always cheaper and easier of buying medicine than going to hospital. It is possible that people in East Meria do lots of sports and keep very healthy living customs in their daily life, so their immune system is stronger to prevent them from getting cold. Thus, the high consumption of fish would not be the only answer of the low frequency of visiting doctors.

Moreover, another question is what’s the reals causes of absences from school and work. While it argued that cold is a reason of the absences, we have to examine whether medical certificates have been produced for the absences. Maybe students are not interested in some courses and the working conditions are terrible for workers, so both students and workers would not prefer to go to schools or working places. If the absences are caused by factors other than cold, the consumption of fish would not take effect.

Finally, it is important to ask what is the effects of taking fish oil. Fish is a prefect seafood with a plenty of nutrition, and it is also a great substitution of pork and beef. Granted that eating fish can diminish the chance of getting cold, but eating fish oil may not have the same effect. Despite fish oil is derived from fish, it doesn’t promise to involve all the nutrition a fish has. Also, the potential harm of taking fish oil shall be checked. Many nutritional supplement pills may have been adulterated heavy metal element which would have side-effect and cause chronic diseases.

In conclusion, in order to evaluate this argument, we have to fully examine the questions promoted above.