Issue213---最近几篇又臭又长，麻烦各位了！！！！！求砖！！！！！！！！！！111

RikkuUID: 170558

Issue213  第10篇 让砖头来得更猛烈些吧！
------摘要------
作者：寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间：51分25秒     770 words
从2004年11月5日23时7分到2004年11月5日23时51分
------题目------
有保留的同意
1。 针对题目第一句话，我的观点是不同的社会强调得不一样
2。将质疑的好处， 说明学校把培养这种能力作为一个目标
3。将容忍，妥协和合作的好处，说明学校也应该把培养这些能力作为一个目标
结尾，学校的目标应该是培养综合能力的学生
Too much emphasis has been placed on the need for students to challenge the assertions of others. In fact, the ability to compromise and work with others—that is, the ability to achieve social harmony—should be a major goal in every school.
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In this world, there are diverse cultures which determine different attitude towards knowledge. For example, western society emphasizes challenging the assertions of others, while orient society pays more attention to follow others. As a result, western schools consider more the ability to challenge as their major goal, and the ability to compromise and work with others is emphasis more by orient schools. In my point of view, both of these abilities are necessary and significantly important. Thus, to meet the social need, it is sensible for every school to nurture its students to be comprehensive ones who has both the ability to challenge and the ability to compromise and cooperate.

To begin with, different societies place emphasis on the diverse need for students. This is not only related with various cultures, but also different educational systems. When we consider the major goal of western schools and orient schools, the variety is especially obvious. For example, students of American schools, are encouraged to think independently and challenge what seem to be correct, while schools in china place more emphasis on the natural and basic subjects such as math, physics, chemistry and so on. Chinese students are required to follow their teachers and parents. As a result, American students have more imagination and creation than Chinese students who are better at knowledge of natural subjects. Another reason why this happens is the different educational systems. In china, students, despite in senior schools or element schools, are all overshadowed by infinite exams, and what they can do is to get a mark as high as possible. Since what is tested is what the teachers provide in class, students should follow what is taught in order to get a higher mark, even though what is taught is wrong. In contrast, American students have much less pressure of exams. They are admitted to doubt everything that seem to be incorrect and their teachers and parents always would like to answer their questions. All of these illustrate that that schools of different cultures and educational systems place different emphasis on the need for students.

In addition, the abilities of compromise and cooperation as well as suspicion, are the same important and necessary. And many great achievements derive from suspicion. For example, Copernicus challenged the thinking of religion at that time, and has led us to the truth. Galileo's doubt to Aristotle resulted in the discovery of the law of free fall. Numerous evidences show that every great advance of the society is related with suspicion. To prevent human imagination and creation from disappearing, every school should nurture students to embrace the ability to doubt.

On the other hand, the ability to compromise and work with others is sometimes a sensible way to achieve success. For instance, the major goal of companies is to receive profits as many as possible. In the trade, it is inevitable that the benefits of two companies may collide, then it is better for each of the company to compromise to some extent instead of sticking to its own benefits, or no one can receive even one dollar. In our daily life, compromise is also very important. No body would like to quarrel with others frequently. If you want to get along well with others, you must learn to compromise. If everyone can compromise properly, social harmony will be achieved. Consequently, the ability to compromise should be one of major goals in every school. Then we shall consider the ability to cooperate. As a matter of fact, sometimes cooperation is more important than competence. Suppose that an army has little sense of cooperation, despite how powerful the separate individual is, it is more likely to be defeated. Many campaigns in history that the majority have been defeated by minority depended on excellent cooperation. So is it in our daily life. In other words, if we make good use of the ability to work with others, we may be more efficient. Therefore, every school should imbue the sense of cooperation to students. In a word, the ability to compromise and cooperation is necessary and important as well as the ability to doubt. Every school should emphasize them.

In sum, different societies place emphasis on different need for students. It is obvious that western society emphasizes the ability to challenge the assertions of others, while orient society pays more attention to require students to follow others. And it is on doubt that the ability to compromise and work with others is also significantly important and necessary. Therefore, the major goal of very school should be nurturing comprehensive students who have both of these abilities.

brooding123UID: 187550

我的理解似乎不是要说这两种不同能力在不同的社会有不同的需求，题目好像暗示的是在一个社会这两种能力何种更重要
如果我写会将侧重点放在这两种能力的不同作用上 当然楼主也就此进行了详细论述 我感觉将 论点分的更细一点 每段不要过长是不是会更好一些
个人意见哟

RikkuUID: 170558

对的，谢谢你的意见

我b1是对题目第一话的回应，因为题目说社会太强调挑战的能力，但我个人觉得不同的地方有不同的强调，就此我论述了一段，不知是否妥当

欢迎大家指正

花之颜色UID: 187195

In this world, there are diverse cultures which determine different attitude towards knowledge. For example, western society emphasizes challenging the assertions of others, while orient society pays more attention to follow others. As a result, western schools consider more the ability to challenge as their major goal, and the ability to compromise and work with others is [U]emphasis [/U]  用动词more by orient schools. In my point of view, both of these abilities are necessary and significantly important. Thus, to meet the social need, it is sensible for every school to nurture its students to be comprehensive ones who has both the ability to challenge and the ability to compromise and cooperate.

To begin with, different societies place emphasis on the diverse need for students. This is [U]not only related with [/U]  (语序调一下related with not only这样与后面搭配)various cultures, but also different educational systems. When we consider the major goal of western schools and orient schools, the variety is especially obvious. For example, students of American schools, are encouraged to think independently and challenge what [B]seem to be correct[/B] , while schools in [U]china [/U]  place more emphasis on the natural and basic subjects such as math, physics, chemistry and so on. [U]Chinese students are required to follow their teachers and parents. [/U] 这句比前一句更适合接while跟美国学生比较啊 As a result, American students have more imagination and creation than Chinese students who are better at knowledge of natural subjects. Another reason why this happens is the different educational systems. In china, students, [U]despite in [/U]  两个介词?senior schools or element schools, are all overshadowed by infinite exams, and what they can do is to get a mark as high as possible. Since what is tested is what the teachers provide in class, students should follow what is taught in order to get a higher mark, even though what is taught is wrong. In contrast, American students have much less pressure of exams. They are admitted to doubt everything that [B]seem to be incorrect [/B]  跟前面矛盾啊and their teachers and parents always would like to answer their questions. All of these illustrate that that schools of different cultures and educational systems place different emphasis on the need for students.中心句和结束句的need用的怪怪的,看不明白不同社会重视学生的不同需要?,这一段有点跟主题无关的感觉,
除了中美学生对比中看出美国学生因为敢于质疑而比中国学生有创造力外,其他的论证好像离题了.
In addition, the abilities of compromise and cooperation as well as suspicion, are the same important and necessary. And many great achievements derive from suspicion. For example, Copernicus challenged the thinking of religion at that time, and has led us to the truth. Galileo's doubt to Aristotle resulted in the discovery of the law of free fall. Numerous evidences show that every great advance of the society is related with suspicion. To prevent human imagination and creation from disappearing, every school should nurture students to embrace the ability to doubt.这段很精彩的例子排比,好有气势的说!强烈建议把第一段删掉,然后第二段开头改一下作为第一段,然后再进一步阐述一下.

On the other hand, the ability to compromise and work with others is sometimes a sensible way to achieve success. For instance, the major goal of companies is to receive profits as many as possible. In the trade, it is inevitable that the benefits of two companies may collide, then it is better for each [U]of the [/U] 删掉比较简洁 company to compromise to some extent instead of sticking to its own benefits, [U]or no one can receive even one dollar[/U] 有点突兀建议加一句由于恶性竞争. In our daily life, compromise is also very important. No body would like to quarrel with others frequently. If you want to get along well with others, you must learn to compromise. If everyone can compromise properly, social harmony will be achieved. Consequently, the ability to compromise should be one of major goals in every school. Then we shall consider the ability to cooperate. As a matter of fact, sometimes cooperation is more important than competence. Suppose that an army has little sense of cooperation, [U]despite[/U]  换no matter好点how powerful [U]the separate individual[/U] 改成its single soldier is, it is [U]more[/U] 没有用比较级的必要啊随便一个程度副词就行了吧 likely to be defeated. [U]Many campaigns in history that the majority have been defeated by minority depended on excellent cooperation. [/U] 别扭建议改成(There are many campaigns in history that the minority defeated majority  depending on excellent cooperation.) So is it in our daily life. In other words, if we make good use of the ability to work with others, we may be more efficient. Therefore, every school should imbue the sense of cooperation to students. [U]In a word, the ability to compromise and cooperation is necessary and important as well as the ability to doubt. Every school should emphasize them.[/U] z这句稍嫌多余全文结尾时候说就可以了吧
In sum, different societies place emphasis on different need for students. It is obvious that western society emphasizes the ability to challenge the assertions of others, while orient society pays more attention to require students to follow others. And it is on doubt that the ability to compromise and work with others is also significantly important and necessary. Therefore, the major goal of very school should be nurturing comprehensive students who have both of these abilities.

RikkuUID: 170558

谢谢楼上的修改，你的修改对我帮助很大，
我对这个题目的第一层还比较抹零两可

能不能谈谈你的看发呢？