issue144 艺术类，内附很细的中文提纲，各位喜欢互改的牛牛们尽管来拍，小弟定会

pdyhcUID: 177332

刚才许诺说要来看你的144，一进来就傻眼了。昨天刚花了整天的功夫干掉了131，也是让人及其郁闷的艺术啊。发誓三天内不碰艺术。没想到…………blur，原谅我吧，我现在连看艺术的文章都怕。过几天有精神了再来拍这篇吧。艺术的太郁闷了

migao21UID: 58234

issue144. "It is the artist, not the critic*, who gives society something of lasting value."
*a person who evaluates works of art, such as novels, films, music, paintings, etc.

Both artists and critics are necessary to our society, nevertheless, in my opinion; it is critics that not simply give society "value" but the long-term significance, that is, "lasting value".

Admittedly, artists are the coiners of various arts, such as paintings, music, films, novels, etc, which can record the history, discover the truth and represent our lives. By carefully observing society and deeply thinking about the phenomena in people's lives they put their own ideas into works to enrich the culture of our society and enlighten people to find more meaning of life.
这段对艺术家的定义对论证有何帮助？而且现在这个多元化的世界里，定义“艺术”或“艺术家”是一个吃力不讨好的工作。

However, the constant criticisms of many critics bestow our society “lasting value” more than “value” offered by the single artist's one-off creation. For instance, recently, "Sunrise. Impression”, a piece of oil painting drawn by Claude Monet 130 years ago was sold in a extremely high price after a hot competition, which illustrated how did people appreciated this painter .The fact, however, is that Claude Monet did not succeed like so at his time and the disputation about him almost had continued for 50 years maybe longer, which involved so many critics with different voices that more and more people came to question the traditional painting and a number of new painting styles accordingly generated . This example illustrates the point that it is the continuous interaction, question and classifications of critics that make the art works more meaningful and give our society lots of lasting value rather than artists' separately individual creation.
"Monet的时代他不成功， 是以后的评论家是他的印象派画出名"， 作者显然要阐明这个事实，我看了Monet的介绍， 好像他在那个时代的已经很成功了， 不知道作者的 "lasting value"是否指的价值是由金钱体现的呢？

The most important role of critics lies in questioning artists and their works in the unique way of critical thinking with professional knowledge and judging them from different views, which can contribute a lot to the positive development and progress of art. Not only can the constant question and criticism help [U]to[/U] pick the false works out of the true masterpieces to restrict artists, but provide the timely feedback to encourage them to think over their works. I believe most classic music fans tend to regard Symphony No.9 of Beethoven as a great work, but few know it's hard experience to the achievement: firstly, it suffered intense question and criticism for the chaotic rhythm by music critics and after deliberating for a long time Beethoven accepted a critic's advice to fill F.Schiller’s poem "an die freunde" in his No.9, and then, a work with true lasting value came out!
这段我看到2点关于critics对艺术的贡献：1.拣选伟大的艺术品；2.给艺术家建议。我觉得第一点不错， 第二点带来的价值基本上是间接的，感觉有点勉强

Other than the function mentioned above, critics also classify and systematize the separate works in different styles through discovering the multiple meaning and connecting the works with the actuality and history of our society, providing relatively proper standards to choose and convenience for people. Consider, if someone wants to read "the best satiric fictions”, with the instructions and reviews of critics, he/she would make easier choices from the recommended list given by professional critics rather than being tired of distinguishing the masterwork from so many books. At the same time, from the divergence appearing between the past and now criticism on them, he/she may obtain some new ideas. In a sense, only have the individual works been gathered and reconstructed by critics as a integrated framework, they can make lasting sense for society.
我觉得这段的观点是很重要的， critics不（单单）是通过艺术家来给社会带来价值， 而是对艺术(品)的定位，比较，分析让人们知道更多。 但是最后一句话说得太绝了-"only", 我的观点是,艺术(品)的价值不是只是由critics来定的, 而人们都可以赋予意义

In conclusion, artists give society something of value by their works, while by questioning and classifying artists with their works, critics extend the single work's short-term sense into long-term sense and bring a lot of lasting value to our society.
最后一段紧扣主题, 很好的总结

pdyhcUID: 177332

呵呵，还是硬着头皮来看你的”艺术“了。：）
Both artists and critics are necessary to our society, nevertheless, in my opinion; it is critics that not simply give society "value" but the long-term significance, that is, "lasting value".感觉这一段一是文笔不够精练和深入（当然这个很难），二是对issue内涵把握不够深刻。Issue说的是“是艺术家，而不是艺术批评家为社会创造了长久价值”。可是你开篇却没有完全围绕这个来打转转，有一半游离于主题外了。你说的是“批评家不仅仅给了社会”价值“，而且给的是长久价值”。 这个原题区别还是有的哦。我觉得你这句要说的或许是两个都对lasting value 有贡献，然后想厚此薄彼一下。但是你发现没有，原issue里有两个主体，artists 和critic,可是你的后半句只涉及了其中一个主体，所以我说你有一半跑题了。人家让你比较的是这辆个对lasting value的贡献程度，而不是critic对lasting value 贡献的情况啊。兄弟，开头很重要。后面可以差点，开头不可掉以轻心

看完你的文章，知道这一段问题在哪里了。你不同意人家issue说的，你想强调critic对Lasting value 的贡献。我能理解你，但是，后面不理artists对lasting value的贡献，罢了，没关系。但是，开篇总得说一下吧，不然感觉不完整。

我觉得这样比较好“某些人assert that“It is the artist, not the critic*, who gives society something of lasting value.” However，说你不同意。 你觉得critic给了lasting value" 。 个人感觉不这样提一下的话，你后面又没说人家artists对lasting value 的作用，critic就缺少了比较的参照对象，weak了。任何比较都要有参照物嘛


Admittedly, artists are the coiners of various arts, such as paintings, music, films, novels, etc, which can record the history, discover the truth and represent our lives. By carefully observing society and deeply thinking about the phenomena in people's lives they put their own ideas into works to enrich the culture of our society and enlighten people to find more meaning of life.
同意17楼，这一段没有扣到主题。而且语言表达也不够紧凑。（我知道，说到这个，郁闷又无奈啊。我也是）

However, the constant criticisms of many critics bestow our society “lasting value” more than “value” offered by the single artist's one-off creation. For instance, recently, "Sunrise. Impression”, a piece of oil painting drawn by Claude Monet 130 years ago was sold in a extremely high price after a hot competition, which illustrated how did people appreciated this painter .The fact, however, is that Claude Monet did not succeed like so at his time and the disputation about him almost had continued for 50 years maybe longer, which involved so many critics with different voices that more and more people came to question the traditional painting and a number of new painting styles accordingly generated . This example illustrates the point that it is the continuous interaction, question and classifications of critics that make the art works more meaningful and give our society lots of lasting value rather than artists' separately individual creation.
结合17楼的批评，我觉得文章如果能适当对lasting value进行一点较深刻的关注，效果可能好呢

The most important role of critics lies in questioning artists and their works in the unique way of critical thinking with professional knowledge and judging them from different views, which can contribute a lot to the positive development and progress of art. Not only can the constant question and criticism help to pick the false works out of the true masterpieces to restrict artists, but provide the timely feedback to encourage them to think over their works. I believe most classic music fans tend to regard Symphony No.9 of Beethoven as a great work, but few know it's hard experience to the achievement: firstly, it suffered intense question and criticism for the chaotic rhythm by music critics and after deliberating for a long time Beethoven accepted a critic's advice to fill F.Schiller’s poem "an die freunde" in his No.9, and then, a work with true lasting value came out!
对于这一段，不太同意17楼。个人觉得第二点还可以了拉。对于艺术这玩意，能找到点论据不容易。

Other than the function mentioned above, critics also classify and systematize the separate works in different styles through discovering the multiple meaning and connecting the works with the actuality and history of our society, providing relatively proper standards to choose and convenience for people. Consider, if someone wants to read "the best satiric fictions”, with the instructions and reviews of critics, he/she would make easier choices from the recommended list given by professional critics rather than being tired of distinguishing the masterwork from so many books. At the same time, from the divergence appearing between the past and now criticism on them, he/she may obtain some new ideas. In a sense, only have the individual works been gathered and reconstructed by critics as a integrated framework, they can make lasting sense for society.


In conclusion, artists give society something of value by their works, while by questioning and classifying artists with their works, critics extend the single work's short-term sense into long-term sense and bring a lot of lasting value to our society.
最后一段确实紧扣主题, 很好的总结，但是语言表到有点幼稚。
比如第一句，在这个场合，give似乎完全可用好点的替代品。Give这个词的这个用法，让我觉得，你用词是不是有点过于随意？我们些作文不能象某些人说的追求词汇 的花俏，只玩GRE词汇。但是，必要的变换还是需要的。其实我们已掌握的词汇够我们用和换的。我觉得，换个句式，然后用produce, create什么的是不是比give好点？拙见拉。我觉得这里give的用法和issue里那个give 味道还是有微妙差异的

blur， 我怀疑我简直有点和你对着干的味道。我打算改完大家3篇，写完我手上还剩的半篇，就来写你这个题目。呵呵，和你顶牛上了。咱俩好好比拼一下。―――开玩笑拉。希望写后能得到大家继续关注。我可能会把我的跟帖到你这个主题下。到时候劳烦关注哦：）

blur13_0UID: 150275

;) 感谢 pdyhc 的顶牛[俺也这么想，血战到底 :p ]，和migao的冷静的砖头，呵呵，我先去拍拍二位的issue，回头再改这篇的第四遍！
对了，migao而为何不也借我的“教训”，趁热打铁写一下，肯定远超我的这篇！ ;)

zhangsx_1982UID: 176926

我刚写完issue144，看完你的觉得你改的这篇从论证到逻辑都不错，举例文字基本上没的说，我得跟你的论点恰好相反，看完你的我都觉的我写的没道理了。呵呵

zhangsx_1982UID: 176926

给的关于艺术的连接不错，谢谢分享

pdyhcUID: 177332

Issue 144. "It is the artist, not the critic*, who gives society something of lasting value."
*a person who evaluates works of art, such as novels, films, music, paintings, etc.

50分钟写成。第一篇勉强算是限时成功的作文。写的很烂了拉。说好和blur顶牛的，就帖上来了。大家看看就行了，作个对比。如果忙，就不要费心细改我这篇了。我自己都还没有进行过细致修改啊。不想耽搁大家的宝贵时间。如果回头我自己修改得差不多， 有请大家修改的价值，大家到时候再费心吧。还有那个zhangsx，写好了没有？贴上来一起探讨。


Art, the highest understanding of the world, which records human being’s life and history, provides humanity lasting value. Someone asserts that it is the artist, not the critic, gives society something of lasting value. However, for my part, I deem that both artists, who create art works, and critics, who evaluate works of art, are indispensable and equally important in producing such lasting value. What different lies between them is their performing means and different function in creating such lasting values.

Artists reveal their views or record what happening in the world through their works. The values formed in those works are crucial parts in constituting social lasting shared values. Paintings reveal and convey people’s aesthetic preferences. Literatures disclose people’s inner psychological world and feeling needs. Films rebuild and even refine the real world on the screen and usually represent the cotemporary moral and esthetic trends. Music serves as a subtle channel for people to express those things closest to their hearts. All kinds of art works serve as vital medias to develop shared values that underpin the social cohesion.

Undoubtedly, it is artists, who create such art works, create such lasting value directly．Without artists, where art works come out? Without works, how do the critics criticize? Losing their criticizing objects, the critics can do nothing to create any kind of lasting values.

However, critics’ contribution in constructing such lasting value should not be neglected. An important function of art is to be appreciated by the public. However, in most cases, a piece of artwork rather reveals the aesthetic preference or the inner mental world of the artist who create it than appeal to the public appetite. It is quite common that many invaluable art works cannot be well understood or widely accepted by the public. The history of art tells that people ever neglected many great art works in long time. In such situation, even the art works contain great values, if it cannot be disclosed to the public, they may lose the lasting value they deserved. The importance of critics is more likely to be evaluated reasonably in such circumstances. People may find the critics may do even more contributions in uncovering such potential value of those neglected art works to the public. Such disclosure can be regarded as reproduction of lasting value in certain levels.         

In a word, both artists and critics play crucial roles in creating or disclosing the lasting values of artworks. They just work in different ways. While artists create lasting values through constructing artworks, critics disclose or reproduce lasting values through evaluating artists’ works.

migao21UID: 58234

感谢 pdyhc 的顶牛[俺也这么想，血战到底  ]，和migao的冷静的砖头，呵呵，我先去拍拍二位的issue，回头再改这篇的第四遍！
对了，migao而为何不也借我的“教训”，趁热打铁写一下，肯定远超我的这篇！

呵呵，我作文是3.23考， 说实在的，我心里发抖啊（天气也太冷）， 元旦总算全部看完issue的244个题目（现在又有增加吗？）， 在看每个题目的时候，我以第一反应写下我的观点－yes or no， 尽量不partial agree， 因为这个最难写。 然后自己开始写了不少提纲， 说到真正练习，只有写了1篇， 主要对自己的语言表达没有信心。 看到你对语言运用的熟练， 真的很羡慕。

我评论大家的issue主要从论证的思路例子上来， 因为毕竟这个才是最难把握的。

pdyhcUID: 177332

大家能否同情一把？？？？
估计是个die了。但我还是要血战到底！！！！

blur13_0UID: 150275

;)
Art, the highest understanding of the world, highest是否决对了点？which records human being’s life and history, provides humanity lasting value. Someone asserts that it is the artist, not the critic, gives society something of lasting value.前三句合起来不是更好 However, for my part, I deem that both artists, who create art works, and critics, who evaluate works of art, are indispensable and equally important in producing such lasting value. 用了equally 往下看是否体现啊What different lies between them is their performing means and different function in creating such lasting values.

Artists reveal their views or record what happening in the world through their works. The values formed in those works are crucial parts in constituting social lasting shared没懂 values. Paintings reveal and convey people’s aesthetic preferences. Literatures disclose people’s inner psychological world and feeling needs. Films rebuild and even refine the real world on the screen and usually represent the cotemporary moral and esthetic trends. Music serves as a subtle channel for people to express those things closest to their hearts. All kinds of art works serve as vital medias to develop shared values that underpin the social cohesion.动词的运用真多样啊，佩服

Undoubtedly, it is artists, who create换个coin such art works, create such lasting value directly．Without artists, where art works come out? Without works, how do the critics criticize? Losing their criticizing objects, the critics can do nothing to create any kind of lasting values.直白的表达啊，不错的过渡

However放到前面段里，这里用on the other hand, critics’ contribution in constructing such lasting value should not be neglected. An important function of art is to be appreciated by the public. However, in most cases, a piece of artwork rather reveals the aesthetic preference or the inner mental world of the artist who create it than appeal to the public appetite.上句很重要，调整表达会更有力 It is quite common that many invaluable art works cannot be well understood or widely accepted by the public. The history of art tells that people ever neglected换ignore many great art works in long time. In such situation, even the art works contain great values, if it cannot be disclosed to the public, they may lose the lasting value they deserved. The importance of critics is more likely to be evaluated reasonably in such circumstances后面再加个than….更有力. People may find the critics may换can do even more contributions in uncovering such potential value of those neglected art works to the public. Such disclosure can be regarded as reproduction of lasting value in certain levels.最后一句很好，为何不放到最前面阿？

In a word, both artists and critics play crucial roles in creating orand disclosing the lasting values of artworks. althoughThey just work in different ways. While artists create lasting values through constructing artworks, critics disclose or reproduce lasting values through evaluating artists’ works.
总评
1结构清晰，应该坚定信心
2其他小问题已经给出，我建议把每段的主题句再加强调
3限时写这么多，我要是考前能写这么多，满足已