Issue11，写的很像A的I，请指教，多谢～

花之颜色UID: 187195

为啥偶越写越没感觉了哪？郁闷ing~这篇文章写完觉得自己好象问题宝宝，提了一堆问题，不知道这次有没有写跑题？最近老怕这个~大家尽情砸吧！
11"All nations should help support the development of a global university
designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most
persistent social problems."
提纲：
1不是所有国家都有能力资助这样一所大学
2 建立这样一所解决问题的大学可能会产生更多问题
3 没有必要建这样一个大学

Is it necessary to require all nations to contribute to establish a global university in order to prepare the students for solving the world's most persistent social problems? In my opinion, this suggestion is reasonable to some extent though, it is not practical at all.

Firstly, not all nations can afford such a costly project. As we all know, there are many countries in poor conditions all over the world like Kenya, Sudan etc. Some of those African countries have been in chaos for years, while others suffer disasters like famine and are in great need of money themselves. If there is not a stead political situation in such countries like Sudan, then which government should disburse the funds to develop the global university? And, when it comes to Kenya, since the nation itself is in substantive debt, is it too cruel if we ask its government to go on to borrow money from the international banks to support the university? How could we have the heart to take the money, which could be used to save a lot of hungry and ill children?  

Secondly, to establish such a university aiming at solving problems might produce more problems. After all, not all nations are willing to invest on such an unproductive enterprise. Then how should we demand the unwilling nations to subsidize this project? Should we coerce them to pay for the funds the development of the university in need of by force? If so, how would we deal with potentially caused war and other international affairs? Even if we could win the war, the defeated nation is very likely to have little money to spend on the university, since we all know that modern war is quite exorbitant. At the same time, the winner would undergo tremendous loss as well. Furthermore, given that we could convince all the governments to support the foundation of the university, then how should they support the development of the university? Is just paying money enough or the labor resources are ok either? Also, how could we make sure that all the nations have made equal contributions? And who can superintend the funds to be properly used? Accordingly, after further examination, we will find that this advice is something the matter and the problems it created might be more difficult to solve than the problems expected to deal with by the trained students.

Last but very crucial, is there a necessity to found such a university to solve so-called persistent social problems? Before we take the advice into consideration, why not try our best to settle those seemingly impossible problems? Are those problems really too difficult to deal with or just inextricable in a short term? Why the problems cannot be figured out? Maybe the time and money spent on the development of the university and on training and education should be used to coping with the problems themselves and the result may be much better. After all, different nations have different conditions and we cannot solve various problems in the same way. It is better to leave those specific problems to local governments than train unqualified persons to make a mess. In terms of those common problems, they could also be solved through international cooperation.

To sum up, since the communication means are so developed and undoubtedly will be more and more advanced in the future, it will be more convenient for nations to cooperate and deal with collective problems. In this way, it seems not required for all nations to waste their time, energy and money to set up a dispensable university. Not to mention the potential problems produced in the development of the university, which might be more complicated and inextricable.

panda2727UID: 138271

提问题是很好的啊。写之前提问题是对构思很好的帮助。我在写提纲的时候，就是先狂问自己问题，再整理思路。提出了问题再解决，就会是很好的文章。
在第二部分，“会产生更多的问题”论证展开不够。这部分应该是你的重点。建一个全球大学到底会带来什么问题呢？在这个问题上，没有说清楚。你说了“有的会不同意，强迫他，甚至战争什么的”。但是，感觉你始终没有切中关键。其实，你反问的问题中，展开写其中的几个，就是很好的论证。
第三部分，我的理解你是要说还有一些急需解决的当前问题。我认为有必要说明这些是什么问题，为什么要急需解决。

不怕开水烫的猪UID: 187893

同意panda，有太多的问句了，感觉不好
body2写的不太好，战争的例子看了半天才看懂。好像第二段的论点是挺难论证的，不如少说一点放在后面。
而body3中 global university 到底能不能解决社会上的根深蒂固的问题 应该提前，而且要扩展为一大段。我觉得题目的意思主要是让我们来分析能不能解决问题，至于有没有钱，而一些如何投资的问题相比之下感觉是less important

另外，这道题是说只建一所世界大学，还是在每个国家各建一个？

花之颜色UID: 187195

多谢~受教了!偶再想想.主要毛病好象就是写的太模糊了,没有具体的例证是致命伤,sigh~

panda2727UID: 138271

没有具体的例证并不是致命伤啊。就象咱们写中文作文一样。没有具体的例子，但是有严密的逻辑，一样是好作文。

这是我最近一篇文章。谢谢评改。http://211.151.90.54/bbs/showthread.php?s=&threadid=242653