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[i习作temp] issue9 请大家修改。 [复制链接]

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发表于 2005-1-22 22:24:24 |显示全部楼层
Topic: Academic disciplines have become so specialized in recent years that scholars’ ideas reach only a narrow audience. Until scholars can reach a wider audience, their ideas will have little use.

In this rapid developmental society, according to the circumstance which more and more various of research and information were interacted each other, specialization has been a very common and natural phenomenon in order to let social technology and skills be properly and usefully fit at its needing. Therefore, academic disciplines which become so specialization that scholar’s ideas can reach only a narrow audience is also a normal situation for the purpose to let their students to satisfy the social needing. And undeniably, at first glance, the trend of specialization which would be little use if scholars can not reach a wider audience sounds reasonable. But you will find the real answer after you read my under argument.

Firstly, specialization can propel the development of economics forward. Specialization means there would be more and more departments and aspects divided from those primitive realms in order to let jobs and projects be finished better and effective. For example,  bread used to be make only by two or three workers including all of the gradual steps from mixing the powder to finishing the mature bread. And they would expend long time to finish one bread by themselves. But nowadays, we can see many bakeries are not the same circumstance with the past. Tens of the workers are making bread. Each of them has their different goads and jobs even they are working in the same place. The integrated course of bread making has divided into different steps for the purpose to be more easy and quick than the ever. But they can make many different kinds of bread in only few minutes because they are very specialization. The most biggest linking store which name KFC fascinate people of all over the world is the best example. And this illustrate that without specialization, we can only live in a society which is slow and ineffective.

Secondly, specialization can also benefit the politics. Specialization can make departments of the government be more effective and efficient to do beneficial affairs for people. According to the researchers’ statistics, the quantity of governmental departments divided in these years have been more than 2.5 times than the ever in order to be more appropriate for the needing of people. It can make more convenience and benefit. And thus this changing can also make the government work better than ever so that people support the government and the administrative party. And that will be good at the political stability. Consequently, specialization also can let the political government keep on development.

Thirdly, specialization can make arts be more colorful and wonderful. With more and more discoveries and inventions in the field of arts coming, specialization is unavoidable to make many kinds of different views and aspects develop and keep better than the past. Therefore, arts were divided into many kinds and various. For example, many kinds characters of arts have enough room to body different hands of the arts. In the past, we can only see some handwritings of our ancestor invent and make. But nowadays, we often can enjoy many drawings and handwritings exhibitions which embody many characters of the arts. Thus, we can make a decision that we can make arts advantages from specialization.

Unquestionably, specialization would benefit all of the spheres around us. But over specialization can also be detrimental to our country. Thus it is very important for us to make specialization be stability.

To sum, we can draw a conclusion that specialization will not have little use if we can make it work reasonably and normally. And it can also reach more and more audience when it develop gradually.

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发表于 2005-1-23 00:21:24 |显示全部楼层
顶一下,今晚困了,明天当作首要任务
成功紧跟着努力
幸福紧跟着痛苦
知足常乐,能忍自安,随缘悟性,吃亏何妨。
以律人之心律己,以恕己之心恕人。

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发表于 2005-1-25 15:59:18 |显示全部楼层
In this rapid developmental society, according to the circumstance inwhich more and more various of of 去掉researchs and information were 主动语态interacted each other=reciprocally, specialization has been a very common and natural phenomenon in order to let social technology and skills be properly and usefully fit at its needingneed. Therefore, academic disciplines which become so specializationspecialized that scholar’s ideas can reach only a narrow audience is also a normal situation for the purpose to let their students to satisfy the social needing.need And undeniably, at first glance, the trend of specialization which would be little use if scholars can not reach a wider audience sounds reasonable. But you will find the real answer after you read my under argument under去掉,改成below.我觉得这个开头有点长,而且长句太多,楼主可以把句子拆拆,长短结合,比较有力

Firstly, specialization cancan 去掉 propel the development of economics forward. Specialization means there would be more and more departments and aspects divided from those primitive感觉这词我会想到原始人,用original会不会好点呢? realms in order to let jobs and projects be finished better and effective. For example, bread used to be make only by two or three workers including all of the gradual steps from mixing the powder to finishing the mature这个字好象形容水果会比较多一点,熟面包吗?是固定用法吗? bread. And they would expend expended long time to finish one bread a piece of 不可数名词 by themselves. But nowadays, we can see many bakeries are not the same circumstance with the past. Tens of the workers are making bread. Each of them has their different goads and jobs even they are working in the same place. The integrated course of bread making has divided into different steps for the purpose to be more easy and quick than the ever. But they can make many different kinds of bread in only few minutes because they are very specialization. The most biggest linking store which name KFC fascinate people of all over the world is the best example. And this illustrate that without specialization, we can only live in a society which is slow and ineffective a lagging and ineffective society. 我觉得举做面包不是很贴切,因为这道题是说academic principles.虽然做面包也是要有学问的。而且面包发展到现在,audience是越来越多呀

Secondly, specialization can also benefit the politics. Specialization can make departments of the government be more effective and efficient to do beneficial affairs for people. According to the researchers’ statistics, the quantity of governmental departments divided in these years have been more than 2.5 times than the ever in order to be more appropriate for the needing of people. It can make more convenience and benefit. And thus this changing can also make the government work better than ever so that people support the government and the administrative party. And that will be good at the political stability. Consequently, specialization also can let the political government keep on development.

Thirdly, specialization can make arts be more colorful and wonderful. With more and more discoveries and inventions in the field of arts coming, specialization is unavoidable to make many kinds of different views and aspects develop and keep better than the past. Therefore, arts were divided into many kinds and various. For example, many kinds characters of arts have enough room to body different hands of the arts. In the past, we can only see some handwritings of our ancestor invent and make. But nowadays, we often can enjoy many drawings and handwritings exhibitions which embody many characters of the arts. Thus, we can make a decision that we can make arts advantages from specialization.

Unquestionably, specialization would benefit all of the spheres around us. But over specialization can also be detrimental to our country. Thus it is very important for us to make specialization be stability.

To sum, we can draw a conclusion that specialization will not have little use if we can make it work reasonably and normally. And it can also reach more and more audience when it develop gradually.
因为我拍砖时都先看结构,我看到b1第一句后就直接再跳到你的b3和b4的ts上,你是不是把题目贴做了,写了specialization的问题?若是本题的话,我觉得偏得很厉害。你再看看题目。我的理解是audience的大小是否能觉得某一个academic discipline的价值。你再多读几遍。
肯定的有分领域的概念。我第一次用分领域时很兴奋的。:)
加油!!用词上要注意,还有贴出来时自己放到word里改一下先,一直出现太多词汇上的拼写错误时,会让帮你改的人有反感的喔!!
前面几段语句的问题我都帮你标了出来。

愚见。:)
最后冲刺了,回砖攒着考完一定还。希望大家多多给以指正。:)

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发表于 2005-1-27 12:07:20 |显示全部楼层
谢谢你的修改!我会好好总结一下!你的文章我有时间一定看,不过这段时间工作太忙拉!

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RE: issue9 请大家修改。 [修改]

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issue9 请大家修改。
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