issue26 historic building and modern development

鬼谷子UID: 159645

大家都给兔兔看了
我不一句一句的给你改了
说说大概的看法吧

1.感觉词句语法上面的错误不少，有速度的同时要注意质量
2.论述不到位，B1说古迹是历史的见证，然后应该当成祖先。这不是乱说吗？应该说古迹的珍贵，历史价值，艺术价值，社会价值等等，你没说到点子上。B2说拆了就不能修复，也是废话。应该说给国家社会历史带来了多大的损失，才能体现出来珍贵。
3.例子不适合。B1的例子说的人头晕而且不懂，因为你说的是你家，别人不一定有相同的感觉的，而且，你说的也不是古迹啊。B2的文革的例子没有说清楚，就说古迹被砸了，砸啥了，带来多大损失啊你都没说。还是没说到点子上。B3的例子同他们俩的意见，不够普遍，因为你是假设的，要么你就假设出来一个放诸四海皆准的情况，要么就引用一个真实的例子，感觉你那个例子的力度不够。

30分钟能写成这样很牛了，不过建议你多花点时间在构思和检查上面。

jorgeUID: 108878

惭愧了。鬼鬼。

我在想是否有些例子可以作为所谓的万金油例子？

临场想个好例子，感觉很困难的说。

为虾米UID: 195758

Issue 26"Most people would agree that buildings represent a valuable record of any society's past, but controversy arises when old buildings stand on ground that modern planners feel could be better used for modern purposes. In such situations当题目读到这里 我会感觉到这个situation并非是一种可以一概而论的单一的situation 相反 确实可以分情况来讨论的 这是一个着手的点, modern development should be given precedence over the preservation of historic buildings so that contemporary needs can be served."这个题目其实是让我们对历史和现代发生矛盾冲突时作出一个取舍 可以看出 单纯的取或者舍都是不符合要求的 也就是说 并非所有的历史建筑都可以忽略价值而被取代 并非所有的现代建筑有足够的价值值得去做取代……
破题不多说 看兔文


Along with the prosperity of modern society, people always come into contact with the conundrum of how to deal with the old buildings when they are against the new development of the city. Some people acclaim that people should give the precedence to modern development while others hold their attitudes that people should preserve the historic buildings. As far as I concerned, I believe that historic可以说本段有一个较大的头换概念 把old偷换成了historic buildings are so important that people should keep them the first whatever situation is. People can not destroy them when they reschedule their new city plans.当把old变成了historic 这就忽略了那些old而不是historic的情况 所以即使该文把论点说的没有任何漏洞 本身的立论上还是缺乏完全扣题

In the first place, historic buildings are the witness of the history; hence, people should admire them just like their ancestors作为TS 这个句子不太好 不够理性也不够深 而且就witness admire都比较模糊 . When one generation turns to the next generation, historic buildings are always standing at the same places这个句子意思不大 可以作为修饰成分 没必要单独占一个句子. They serve as like the fathers of our human beings, watching and caring us, witnessing the change of our society这个特征可是比较普遍的说：n多自然事物也是如此. People do not to look so far in China, even in my home town, a small and beautiful city; they would find these evidences of past history. Through a role of old houses in west city which are the center of a salt market, however they are very small and in poor situation, people could memory? the past prosperity. Through the theater in the east part of the city and these black and while walls, people will know that it is the place, bringing a lot happy and fun to people’s grandmother and fathers. Through the broken floor in a temple, people will never forget that nation defense towards invaders. These all illustrate that historic buildings witness the history of our society.嗯 即使我们信服他们就是见证了 那么就要保留吗？都市之所以变成现在这个样子 还不是由于取代了无数的那些旧房子？兔子应该结合事实想想：为什么好多拆掉了而还有一些没拆掉并且不会拆掉呢？

In the second place, another essential factor why people should consider conserving these historic buildings is that if once these buildings are destroyed, people would never see them again; even more, people will never to restore these buildings if they are destroyed这个论点仍然没有关注到题目提到的当发生矛盾时 我们的选择。就这个论点来说 仅仅是为了保留一个样本存在的话 我们可以把大量的拆除 留有小部分 仍然可以满足吧？时间原因 后面不细看了. A case in point is the Culture Revolution in China. During the movement, Chinese government releases one rule that all old things should be destroyed including these historic buildings. From then on, many precious historic buildings are ruled out. When this movement is over, people realized that they will never see his or her familiar temples again, and they find that they are losing something that they never could restore. Temples are gone, even special old style homes are changed into the regulation structure. This illustration shows that our people have made such mistakes and they have regretted for what they have done; people should preserve these historic buildings.

However, people should realize that any rule is not based on the constant regulation. Historic buildings are definitely important, but people have to make a good select of these buildings or to make some adjustments to fit with the new city development貌似要写一个让步段 问题是 这个开头太像一个大转折了 以至于我觉得前后自相矛盾了 意思倾向是对的 但是句子造的不好 however也不该用. For example, when people have to build a modern entertainment center in an old historic building which turns to be an old movie theater and many people are used to appreciate his place. In this situation, what about the planner to make the modification toward this old theater? They could enhance the size or the height, but hold the previous appearance. This method not only conserves the old building, but also satisfies the modern necessary amusement center.

To conclude, historic buildings are the precious possessions bestowed by our ancestors and people should put them into first in any condition and circumstance. But in order to follow the development, people can make some adjustment so that these buildings can fit the new city as well让步之后中和得出的结论？与其这样中和 为什么部分情况讨论呢？什么情况下保留 什么情况下拆除 什么样的有价值 什么样的没价值 一分析就好 另外语法错误不少 最好先在word里面检查好哦 兔子加油. Following this policy, the new city will become the most beautiful without losing the precious culture.

jorgeUID: 108878

谢谢 为虾米，知道你是谁了。:p

为虾米UID: 195758

最初由 jorge 发布
[B]谢谢 为虾米，知道你是谁了。:p [/B]

又装大尾巴狼 :mad: