issue93 同主题第三期作业

goldenrockUID: 122870

怎么才能不超时啊，唉。。。。

Issue93:
The concept of 'individual responsibility' is a necessary fiction. Although societies must hold individuals accountable for their own actions, people's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making.
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Responsibility, an abstract concept which is derived from morality and ethics, has a long history in human development. It's an important factor not only to individuals but also to the healthy development of the whole society. In my point of view, individual responsibility is necessary, but not a fiction. People's behavior is largely determined by their internal forces, though it also can be influenced by external forces to some degree.

First of all, individual responsibility is not a fiction, it is realistic and really exists in our everyday lives; the society can never work normally without it. Taking a look at the history of human, there were a number of laws and rules which appeared almost as soon as people began to communicate. When people began to talk to each other, the sense of responsibility appeared, because individuals' words were related to their responsibilities. If people talked to someone with no responsibility, they would feel being cheated, and several times later, they would isolate him or her, because they didn’t know what he or she said was right or wrong, then communication could no longer continue. In this sense, individual responsibility also works in our times. No company, school or government would like to employ a person with no responsibility, because his or her work would never be ensured to finish, and moreover, whether he or she has done harm to the organization is still unknown. That's why nowadays many countries are trying to establish a credit standard to measure people's behavior. Under this standard, any affirmative cheat or unjust behavior would be noted, and then it will be taken into account when he or she is being employed or so.

Admittedly, external forces can influence people's behavior to some extent. For example, in a poor country, with limit source of food, people are hard to live. So, the sense of individual responsibility would be diminished. And also, if in a company or even a country, all of its members are working with no responsibility and they are already used to the circumstances, and then a new comer would be easy to get involved because he or she may can not survived if he or she doesn’t do so.

However, People's behavior is largely determined by their internal forces. In most countries, without worrying shortage of food and clothes, people are able to distinguish what they could do and what they could not, therefore their behavior is mostly determined by their internal forces, in other words, people are responsible for their behavior. For example, when a man is going to cross a crosswalk, nobody is nearby and no car in distance, but the traffic light is still red. With responsibility, he has to wait for the light turning green. Furthermore, the law has also warned him to do so. Because, if otherwise, he goes across and is hit by a car, he will also be responsible for his own behavior. Not only he won’t get the money for injury, but also he has to pay the damaged car.

In sum, in most cases, individual responsibility is necessary and realistic. People should be responsible for their behavior, and it’s done by their internal forces mainly.

鬼谷子UID: 159645

我来批作业

限时需要练习的，练习多了就不超时了啊，努力努力！

flyingwindUID: 189320

Responsibility, an abstract concept which is derived from morality and ethics, has a long history in human development. It's an important factor not only to individuals but also to the healthy development of the whole society. In my point of view, individual responsibility is necessary, but not a fiction这个句子不舒服. People's behavior is largely determined by their internal forces, though it also can be influenced by external forces to some degree.

First of all, individual responsibility is not a fiction, it is realistic and really exists in our everyday lives; the society can never work normally without it. Taking a look at the history of human, there were a number of laws and rules which appeared almost as soon as people began to communicate. When people began to talk to each other, the sense of responsibility appeared, because individuals' words were related to their responsibilities.for instance If people talked to someone with no responsibility, they would feel being cheated, and several times later, they would isolate him or her, because they didn’t know what he or she said was right or wrong, then communication could no longer continue. In this sense, individual responsibility also works in our times. No company, school or government would like to employ a person with no responsibility, because his or her work would never be ensured to finish不能保证完工是啥意思, and moreover, whether he or she has done harm to the organization is still unknown. That's why nowadays many countries are trying to establish a credit standard to measure people's behavior. Under this standard, any affirmative cheat请问这个是啥意思 or unjust behavior would be noted, and then it will be taken into account when he or she is being employed or so.这一段可以考虑防到最后一个body里面去

Admittedly, external forces can influence people's behavior to some extent. For example, in a poor country, with limited source of food, people are hard to live. So, the sense of individual responsibility would be diminished. And also, if in a company or even a country, all of its members are working with no responsibility个人责任感，荣誉感就降低了吗？他们的感觉试问你怎么知道的？只能说是他们不能或者没有条件去实现或者负责吧 and they are already used to the circumstances, and then a new comer would be easy to get involved 这1句子不知道社么意思because he or she may can not survived if he or she doesn’t do so.

However, People's behavior is largely determined by their internal forces. In most countries, without worrying shortage of food and clothes, people are able to distinguish what they could do and what they could not, therefore their behavior is mostly determined by their internal forces, in other words, people are responsible for their behavior. For example, when a man is going to cross a crosswalk, nobody is nearby and no car in distance, but the traffic light is still red.例子不错 With responsibility, he has to wait for the light turning green. Furthermore, the law has also warned him to do so. Because, if otherwise, he goes across and is hit by a car, he will also be responsible for his own behavior. Not only he won’t get the money for injury, but also he has to pay the damaged car.

In sum, in most cases, individual responsibility is necessary and realistic. People should be responsible for their behavior, and it’s done by their internal forces mainly.

总的不坏，有的地方句子表达欠佳

boyjimUID: 125249

Issue93:
The concept of 'individual responsibility' is a necessary fiction. Although societies must hold individuals accountable for their own actions, people's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making.
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Responsibility, an abstract concept which is derived from morality and ethics, has a long history in human development. [责任有历史？] It's an important factor not only to individuals but also to the healthy development of the whole society. In my point of view, individual responsibility is necessary, but not a fiction. People's behavior is largely determined by their internal forces, though it also can be influenced by external forces to some degree.

First of all, individual responsibility is not a fiction, it is realistic and really exists in our everyday lives [看看这样好不好it overwhelm our daily life] ; the society can never work normally without it. Taking a look at the history of human, there were a number of [a number of太滥了 a multitude of] laws and rules which appeared almost as soon as people began to communicate. [好像不一定吧，第一部法律是巴比伦时代建立的] When people began to talk to each other, the sense of responsibility appeared, because individuals' words were related to their responsibilities. If people talked to someone with no responsibility, they would feel being cheated, and several times later, they would isolate him or her, because they didn’t know what he or she said was right or wrong, then communication could no longer continue. In this sense, individual responsibility also works in our times. No company, school or government would like to employ a person with no responsibility, because his or her work would never be ensured to finish, and moreover, whether he or she has done harm to the organization is still unknown. That's why nowadays many countries are trying to establish a credit standard to measure people's behavior. Under this standard, any affirmative cheat or unjust behavior would be noted, and then it will be taken into account when he or she is being employed or so. [感觉这个论证没有到点子上]

Admittedly, external forces can influence people's behavior to some extent. For example, in a poor country, with limit source of food, people are hard to live. So, the sense of individual responsibility would be diminished. And also, if in a company or even a country, all of its members are working with no responsibility and they are already used to the circumstances, and then a new comer would be easy to get involved because he or she may can not survived if he or she doesn’t do so. [用词过于简单了这段]

However, People's behavior is largely determined by their internal forces. In most countries, without worrying shortage of food and clothes, people are able to distinguish what they could do and what they could not, therefore their behavior is mostly determined by their internal forces, in other words, people are responsible for their behavior. For example, when a man is going to cross a crosswalk, nobody is nearby and no car in distance, [句子有问题，把下面那一句连上来，不要分开两句] but the traffic light is still red. With responsibility, he has to wait for the light turning green. Furthermore, the law has also warned him to do so. Because, [the reason for it] if otherwise, he goes across and is hit by a car, he will also be responsible for his own behavior. Not only he won’t get the money for injury, but also he has to pay the damaged car. [这个假设的例子有点怪]

In sum, in most cases, individual responsibility is necessary and realistic. People should be responsible for their behavior, and it’s done by their internal forces mainly.

鬼谷子UID: 159645

Issue93:
The concept of 'individual responsibility' is a necessary fiction. Although societies must hold individuals accountable for their own actions, people's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making.
---------------------
Responsibility, an abstract concept which is derived from morality and ethics, 【注意到了定义，很好，不过看到其他同学的文章中也出现了derive from morality，是否可以换一种表达方式呢】has a long history in human development. It's an important factor not only to individuals but also to the healthy development of the whole society. In my point of view, individual responsibility is necessary, but not a fiction. People's behavior is largely determined by their internal forces, though it also can be influenced by external forces to some degree. 【观点比较明确，开头方法也不错】

First of all, individual responsibility is not a fiction, it is realistic and really exists in our everyday lives; the society can never work normally without it. Taking a look at the history of human, 【take a look into sth. and you will find/see】 there were a number of laws and rules which appeared almost as soon as people began to communicate. When people began to talk to each other, the sense of responsibility appeared, because individuals' words were related to their responsibilities. 【从交流的角度来谈的，应该强调的一点是，要说明交流也是behavior，因为题目说的责任主要是对于behavior的】If people talked to someone with no responsibility, they would feel being cheated, and several times later, they would isolate him or her, because they didn’t know what he or she said was right or wrong, then communication could no longer continue. 【说的有点罗嗦了】 In this sense, individual responsibility also works in our times. No company, school or government would like to employ a person with no responsibility, because his or her work would never be ensured to finish, and moreover, whether he or she has done harm to the organization is still unknown. That's why nowadays many countries are trying to establish a credit standard to measure people's behavior. 【终于提到了behavior】 Under this standard, any affirmative cheat【affirmative cheat？】 or unjust behavior would be noted, and then it will be taken into account when he or she is being employed or so. 【题目一个隐含的一个因果关系是，人们能够决定其行为，才能够对行为负责，才能有个人责任的概念。所以，要注意明确个人行为的决定者是谁，如果是个人，那么个人责任就是存在的就不是fiction。而你的例子都是对于个人的责任感责任心的一些反应，不是很合适】
Admittedly, external forces can influence people's behavior to some extent. For example, in a poor country, with limit source of food, people are hard to live. So, the sense of individual responsibility would be diminished. 【不透彻，应该继续深入，应该说在这样的情况下人们有什么样的行为，而这样的行为是环境来决定的，所以个人的责任才会diminish】And also, if in a company or even a country, all of its members are working with no responsibility and they are already used to the circumstances, and then a new comer would be easy to get involved because he or she may can not survived if he or she doesn’t do so.  【这个例子是合适的，但是你在例子里面用responsibility不妥，因为这是一个待证的问题，而且，我们这里研究的是外力对于行为的影响，所以，你可以说，在考试中，大家都cheat，你也被迫要cheat，环境影响行为。在一个机构里面，大家都corrupt，你也corrupt，环境影响行为。然后说不这样做不能survive】

However, People's behavior is largely determined by their internal forces. In most countries, without worrying shortage of food and clothes, people are able to distinguish what they could do and what they could not, therefore their behavior is mostly determined by their internal forces, in other words, people are responsible for their behavior. 【这个联系建立的不错】 For example, when a man is going to cross a crosswalk, nobody is nearby and no car in distance, but the traffic light is still red. 【这个例子刚刚也看到有人使用过了】With responsibility, he has to wait for the light turning green. Furthermore, the law has also warned him to do so. Because, if otherwise, he goes across and is hit by a car, he will also be responsible for his own behavior. Not only he won’t get the money for injury, but also he has to pay the damaged car. 【这个例子不是很好】

In sum, in most cases, individual responsibility is necessary and realistic. People should be responsible for their behavior, and it’s done by their internal forces mainly.
【每个论点思考的还可以，但是，我觉得结构应该调换一下，B3B2B1的顺序，先说行为主要是由internal forces决定的，然后说外力也起到了一定的作用，最后说个人责任对于社会的重要性，比如你的例子，人与人之间的信任和公司学校政府等的要求，然后来证明necessary。加油！】

goldenrockUID: 122870

多谢大家！

看到这个题目的时候大脑一片空白，读了鬼帖里的几篇文章才开始写的，
难免用到了几句话，结果都被鬼鬼看出来了。。
真是鬼眼金金啊，呵呵