我也发一个issue87, 高频，谢谢指教

onlyxiaobaiUID: 198198

Issue87  
In any field of inquiry, the beginner is more likely than the expert to make important discoveries.



We have observed through out the history of development of science, humanities and other area that a plethora of contributions have been made by numerous talented people, some of whom made important discoveries when they were just a new comer, some of whom did the same thing when they had already become experts in that area.
It is extremely hard to tell that whether the beginner is more likely than the expert to make important discoveries. In my opinion, the chance is 50% to 50%, and how can make it happen is determined by the will, ardor and persistence of a person.

It is true that sometimes the beginner in a realm is more likely than the expert to make important discoveries. That is probably because they know relatively little about the conventions and rules accumulated in the past, which enables them not to be shackled by the old pattern of thinking but to ask their own questions and seek out their own ways that may have been neglected by their predecessors. For example, the Nobel Economics laureate Coase, who was awarded by his discovery of how firms operates differently from market mechanism, made the crucial discovery only when he was an undergraduate, touring around America to spend his summer vacation. Nash, another Nobel Economics laureate, was awarded by his verification of the existence of Nash Equilibrium, which was also an important discovery obtained when he was an undergraduate in Princeton. Both of them were not seen as expert in their respective fields at that time, but they made remarkable discoveries which directly brought to them Nobel Prize for Economics several years after.

However, although beginners might have some advantages over experts in terms of free mind and unrestrained thinking, experts also have some privileges over beginners. They are more broad-minded, have received more further and sophisticated training in their fields, and have got lots of experiences accumulated through years of study and research. Keynes, who is a renowned economics and the builder of Macroeconomics, made his important discovery of economy functioning when he had been graduated from university as post-graduate and become a recognized professor and researcher himself. Undoubtedly, his previous experiences in study and research had contributed immensely to his discovery.

After scanning those prominent examples, we may find out that, beginners and experts are both likely to make important discoveries in any field of inquiry. The most crucial factor which determines the probability of making important discoveries lies within that person himself. If he dares to challenge the authority, has his own original and creative ideas and thoughts, devotes himself to the discovery of the truth behind the surface, persists to achieve what he pursues, then he might acquire the discovery, regardless that if he is a beginner or an expert. If Coase dared not to challenge the conventional thoughts that firms were “black box”, he would have never been able to discover the true characteristic of firms. If Keynes kept on teaching old theories and formula without reviewing them, he would have never found the pattern of economic development.

And finally, I believe it is safe to draw my conclusion: the crucial factor which determines whether you can make important discoveries or not is not whether you are a beginner or an expert in a field; it lies within yourself-------your courage to challenge authority, impetus to provide creative ideas and your ardor and persistence in your research and inquiry.

soloqiUID: 199951

We have observed through out the history of development of science, humanities and other area that a plethora of contributions have been made by numerous talented people, some of whom made important discoveries when they were just a new comer, some of whom did the same thing when they had already become experts in that area.
It is extremely hard to tell that whether the beginner is more likely than the expert to make important discoveries. In my opinion, the chance is 50% to 50%, and how can make it happen is determined by the will, ardor and persistence of a person.

It is true that sometimes the beginner in a realm is more likely than the expert to make important discoveries. That is probably because they know relatively little about the conventions and rules accumulated in the past, which enables them not to be shackled by the old pattern of thinking but to ask their own questions and seek out their own ways that may have been neglected by their predecessors. For example, the Nobel Economics laureate Coase, who was awarded by his discovery of how firms operates differently from market mechanism, made the crucial discovery only when he was an undergraduate, touring around America to spend his summer vacation. Nash, another Nobel Economics laureate, was awarded by his verification of the existence of Nash Equilibrium, which was also an important discovery obtained when he was an undergraduate in Princeton. Both of them were not seen as expert in their respective fields at that time, but they made remarkable discoveries which directly brought to them Nobel Prize for Economics several years after.

However, although beginners might have some advantages over experts in terms of free mind and unrestrained thinking, experts also have some privileges over beginners. They are more broad-minded, have received more further and sophisticated training in their fields, and have got lots of experiences accumulated through years of study and research. Keynes, who is a renowned economics and the builder of Macroeconomics, made his important discovery of economy functioning when he had been graduated from university as post-graduate and become a recognized professor and researcher himself. Undoubtedly, his previous experiences in study and research had contributed immensely to his discovery.

After scanning those prominent examples, we may find out that, beginners and experts are both likely to make important discoveries in any field of inquiry. The most crucial factor which determines the probability of making important discoveries lies within that person himself. If he dares to challenge the authority, has his own original and creative ideas and thoughts, devotes himself to the discovery of the truth behind the surface, persists to achieve what he pursues, then he might acquire the discovery, regardless that if he is a beginner or an expert. If Coase dared not to challenge the conventional thoughts that firms were “black box”, he would have never been able to discover the true characteristic of firms. If Keynes kept on teaching old theories and formula without reviewing them, he would have never found the pattern of economic development.

And finally, I believe it is safe to draw my conclusion: the crucial factor which determines whether you can make important discoveries or not is not whether you are a beginner or an expert in a field; it lies within yourself-------your courage to challenge authority, impetus to provide creative ideas and your ardor and persistence in your research and inquiry.
你这篇写得很好，应该至少在5分以上。
我没什么可改的。（ 自愧不如）
有个问题请教一下， 请问你是怎么写成这样的文章的？
诚盼指教！

zymhitUID: 199769

Issue87
In any field of inquiry, the beginner is more likely than the expert to make important discoveries.



We have observed through out the history of development of science, humanities and other area that a plethora of contributions have been made by numerous talented people, some of whom made important discoveries when they were just a new comer, some of whom did the same thing when they had already become experts in that area.
It is extremely hard to tell that whether the beginner is more likely than the expert to make important discoveries. In my opinion, the chance is 50% to 50%, and how can make it happen is determined by the will, ardor and persistence of a person.

It is true that sometimes the beginner in a realm is more likely than the expert to make important discoveries. That is probably because they know relatively little about(the relatively是不是应该放在这里更好) conventions and rules accumulated in the past, which enables them not to be shackled by the old pattern of thinking but to ask their own questions and seek out their own ways that may have been neglected by their predecessors. （句子是很长，不过读起来总觉得生硬，新东方的老师说每篇文章要有一个超过3行的句子，我不知道是不是ets也认可这种长句）For example, the Nobel Economics laureate Coase, who was awarded by his discovery of how firms operates differently from market mechanism, made the crucial discovery only（only删掉） when he was an undergraduate, touring around America to spend his summer vacation(touring后面似乎多余了，最好能简洁明了地说：这个主意源于他大学的一次旅行。). Nash, another Nobel Economics laureate, was awarded by his verification of the existence of Nash Equilibrium, which was also an important discovery obtained when he was an undergraduate in Princeton. Both of them were not seen as expert in their respective fields at that time, but they made remarkable discoveries which directly brought to them Nobel Prize for Economics several years after（after应该改成later, for后面可不可以改成when they became experts in economics.）. 这段先说理后举例，例子我认为还好，但是二个例子能不能不全是nobel prize即使是，能不能不光用经济领域的。这一段我看得比较仔细,其他段落没注重语言只看了结构.

However, although beginners might have some advantages over experts in terms of free mind and unrestrained thinking, experts also have some privileges over beginners. They are more broad-minded, have received more further and sophisticated training in their fields, and have got lots of experiences accumulated through years of study and research. Keynes, who is a renowned economics and the builder of Macroeconomics, made his important discovery of economy functioning when he had been graduated from university as post-graduate（when he got his post-graduate degree from university） and become a recognized professor and researcher himself. (整个这句话好像很别扭)Undoubtedly, his previous experiences in study and research had contributed immensely to his discovery.

After scanning those prominent examples, we may find out that, beginners and experts are both likely to make important discoveries in any field of inquiry. The most crucial factor which（that） determines the probability of making important discoveries lies within that person himself. If he dares to challenge the authority, has his own original and creative ideas and（or） thoughts, devotes himself to the discovery of the truth behind the surface, persists to achieve what he pursues,(排比很好) then he might acquire the discovery, regardless that if(that if 改称whether) he is a beginner or an expert.(用一个However,转折一下) If Coase dared not(前面用了dare 这里写成if Coase was not brave enough 不会太土吧) to challenge the conventional thoughts that firms were “black box”, he would have never been able to discover the true characteristic of firms. If Keynes kept on teaching old theories and formula without reviewing them, he would have never found the pattern of economic development.

And finally, I believe it is safe to draw my conclusion: the crucial factor which determines whether you can make important discoveries or not is not whether you are a beginner or an expert in a field; it lies within yourself-------your courage to challenge authority(很好), impetus to provide creative ideas and your ardor and persistence in your research and inquiry.
这篇文章思路很清晰,结构还不错.语言上我写不出你那么好的句子,所以不便发表什么评论,但就我的感觉上来说, 前头有些段落全是从句套从句,中间最好能变一下, 偶尔的短句和问句会起到很好得效果.
我不知道这样全都用一个领域的例子好不好,要是可以的话我以后也这么写.
我本人对AWA了解还不是很透,一家之言,经供参考.
ymzhang@hit.edu.cn

viviansiUID: 190413

我觉得你的文章读起来很顺畅，而且例子很丰富，这是你的一大优点，但是我不知道是不是例子多了就够了呢？是不是 论证在多说 一点

kkytUID: 188814

顶,学习以下

kkytUID: 188814

Issue87
In any field of inquiry, the beginner is more likely than the expert to make important discoveries.

We have observed through out the history of development of science, humanities and other area[areas] that a plethora of[这个词用的很好] contributions have been made by numerous talented people, some of whom made important discoveries when they were just a new comer, some of whom did the same thing when they had already become experts in that area. It is extremely hard to tell that whether the beginner is more likely than the expert to make important discoveries. In my opinion, the chance is 50% to 50%, and how can make it happen is determined by the will, ardor and persistence of a person. [ 这样的背景开头是比较新颖的，基本回应了题目的要求，这道题关键在比较级than上，anyway开头不错，接着看]

It is true that sometimes the beginner in a realm is more likely than the expert to make important discoveries.[论述初学者更] That is probably because they know relatively little about the conventions and rules accumulated in the past, which enables[enable] them not to be shackled by the old pattern[patterns] of thinking but to ask their own questions and seek out their own ways that may have been neglected by their predecessors.[原因分析的很到位] For example, the Nobel Economics laureate Coase, who was awarded by his discovery of how firms operates differently from market mechanism, made the crucial discovery only when he was an undergraduate, touring around America to spend his summer vacation. Nash, another Nobel Economics laureate, was awarded by his verification of the existence of Nash Equilibrium, which was also an important discovery obtained when he was an undergraduate in Princeton. [举的例子很好，但我觉的少了和专家的比较，比如NASH的non-cooperative game theory 开始竟受到他的老板冯•诺依曼(JohnVon Nouma) 的反对]  Both of them were not seen as expert in their respective fields at that time, but they made remarkable discoveries which directly brought to them Nobel Prize for Economics several years after. [总结的还行]

However, although beginners might have some advantages over experts in terms of free mind and unrestrained thinking, experts also have some privileges over beginners. [They are more broad-minded, have received more further and sophisticated training in their fields, and have got lots of experiences accumulated through years of study and research.][赞一个] Keynes, who is a renowned economics and the builder of Macroeconomics, made his important discovery of economy functioning when he had been graduated from university as post-graduate[a postgraduate] and become a recognized professor and researcher himself[himself去掉]. Undoubtedly, his previous experiences in study and research had contributed immensely to his discovery.

After scanning those prominent examples, we may find out that, beginners and experts are both likely to make important discoveries in any field of inquiry.[both and 句型更地道] The most crucial factor which determines the probability of making important discoveries lies within that person himself. If he dares to challenge the authority, has his own original and creative ideas and thoughts, devotes himself to the discovery of the truth behind the surface, persists to achieve what he pursues, then he might acquire the discovery, regardless that if he is a beginner or an expert. If Coase dared not to challenge the conventional thoughts that firms were “black box”, he would have never been able to discover the true characteristic of firms.[ If Keynes kept on teaching old theories and formula without reviewing them, he would have never found the pattern of economic development.] [这个例子说的不好，你上个例子说的是创新精神，这个可以说，若没有ardor 和persistence 就不能取得成功]

And finally, I believe it is safe to draw my conclusion: the crucial factor which determines whether you can make important discoveries or not is not whether you are a beginner or an expert in a field; it lies within[owns to这个上面用过一次了] yourself-------your courage to challenge authority, impetus to provide creative ideas and your ardor and persistence in your research and inquiry.

[总的来说你的这篇文章写的很好，结构清晰，思路也不错，值得学习]
[其实这到题关键在比较，我觉得你做的还行值得注意的是B2中比较，不是很充分，可以加一个例子比如青霉素的发现， Alexander Fleming 和Penicillin 很早之前他的学生就在culture中发现了,但他们都以为是没用的bacteria，当Fleming 回来后以自己的经验判断这是别的东西,一定有价值。]

tianxuUID: 154343

Issue87
In any field of inquiry, the beginner is more likely than the expert to make important discoveries.

We have observed through out the history of development of science, humanities and other area[areas] that a plethora of[这个词用的很好不敢恭维，这个词有过度的意思，可是你只想表示很多，如我我没理解错的话，建议你改成multitude/host/legion ] contributions have been made by numerous talented people, some of whom made important discoveries when they were just a new comer, some of whom did the same thing when they had already become experts in that area. [从第一个some of 后面开始改成这样你看行吗:some of whom were just comers while others have already become experts ]It is extremely hard to tell that whether the beginner is more likely than the expert to make important discoveries. In my opinion, the chance is 50% to 50%, and how can make it happen is determined by the will, ardor and persistence of a person. [ how can what happen?50%to 50% or to make discoveries ]{句子写得太生硬了！读着好累， }

It is true that sometimes the beginner in a realm is more likely than the expert to make important discoveries.[论述初学者更] That is probably because they know relatively little about the conventions and rules accumulated in the past, which enables[enable] them not to be shackled by the old pattern[patterns] of thinking but to ask their own questions and seek out their own ways that may have been neglected by their predecessors.[原因分析的很到位] For example, the Nobel Economics laureate Coase, who was awarded by his discovery of how firms operates differently from market mechanism, made the crucial discovery only when he was an undergraduate, touring around America to spend his summer vacation. Nash, another Nobel Economics laureate, was awarded by his verification of the existence of Nash Equilibrium, which was also an important discovery obtained when he was an undergraduate in Princeton. [举的例子很好，但我觉的少了和专家的比较，比如NASH的non-cooperative game theory 开始竟受到他的老板冯•诺依曼(JohnVon Nouma) 的反对] Both of them were not seen as expert in their respective fields at that time, but they made remarkable discoveries which directly brought to them Nobel Prize for Economics several years after. [总结的还行]

However, although beginners might have some advantages over experts in terms of free mind and unrestrained thinking, experts also have some privileges over beginners. [They are more broad-minded, have received more further and sophisticated training in their fields, and have got lots of experiences accumulated through years of study and research.][赞一个] Keynes, who is a renowned economics and the builder of Macroeconomics, made his important discovery of economy functioning when he had been graduated from university as post-graduate[a postgraduate] and become a recognized professor and researcher himself[himself去掉]. Undoubtedly, his previous experiences in study and research had contributed immensely to his discovery.

After scanning those prominent examples, we may find out that, beginners and experts are both likely to make important discoveries in any field of inquiry.[both and 句型更地道] The most crucial factor which determines the probability of making important discoveries lies within that person himself. If he dares to challenge the authority, has his own original and creative ideas and thoughts, devotes himself to the discovery of the truth behind the surface, persists to achieve what he pursues, then he might acquire the discovery, regardless that if he is a beginner or an expert. If Coase dared not to challenge the conventional thoughts that firms were “black box”, he would have never been able to discover the true characteristic of firms.[ If Keynes kept on teaching old theories and formula without reviewing them, he would have never found the pattern of economic development.] [这个例子说的不好，你上个例子说的是创新精神，这个可以说，若没有ardor 和persistence 就不能取得成功]

And finally, I believe it is safe to draw my conclusion: the crucial factor which determines whether you can make important discoveries or not is not whether you are a beginner or an expert in a field; it lies within[owns to这个上面用过一次了] yourself-------your courage to challenge authority, impetus to provide creative ideas and your ardor and persistence in your research and inquiry.

[总的来说你的这篇文章写的很好，结构清晰，思路也不错，值得学习]
[其实这到题关键在比较，我觉得你做的还行值得注意的是B2中比较，不是很充分，可以加一个例子比如青霉素的发现， Alexander Fleming 和Penicillin 很早之前他的学生就在culture中发现了,但他们都以为是没用的bacteria，当Fleming 回来后以自己的经验判断这是别的东西,一定有价值。]