issue144 个BT题，限时，砍呀砍！

victoriazhizhiUID: 163135

谁叫我大话已经说给小鬼了 今天给他交2个一休一个阿狗 :(
玩了N天了 再不抓紧要完蛋了
小鬼天天骂我都懒死了 净说空话不干正事儿 :mad:
star你写了一堆阿狗 有虾米好建议？我刚开始学了几个逻辑谬误 看没几个范文而已

staralwaysUID: 193479

zhizhi你的Issue我觉得已经很不错了，我最近刚开始限时开始写Issue，你去看的话就会发现真是一塌糊涂了。哎。

关于Argument。我也是从逻辑错误开始的。我觉得要找逻辑错误不难，尤其是跟着“七宗罪”以及相应的例子，再练上几个的话，这道关也算是过了。我范文看得也不多，因为用的新东方的教材，看到上面的范文也不多，而且也基本上开头就是In the argument，……，心想可能argument可能也就这么回事，所以看了没几天就开始写了。然后就是被人指正说开头太模板了。鬼鬼也在我的帖子里说了。所以这两天想去Argument区里转转，挖点宝出来。你如果没看过，去看看也许也有好处呢。反驳的话我想就抓住“要想说一件事情不对，只要指出一个反例”就行，在找错误的时候连带地想下应该就出来了。

zhizhi看你Issue的水平，argument没有的问题的啦。

鬼谷子UID: 159645

Issue144 第1篇 吧啦吧啦吧啦拍！
------摘要------
作者：victoriazhizhi 共用时间：43分38秒 585 words/ 635 words after revised
从2005年3月12日16时46分到2005年3月12日17时30分
------题目------
It is the artist, not the critic,* who gives society something of lasting value.
*a person who evaluates works of art, such as novels, films, music, paintings, etc.
------正文------
In course of time and life,【昨天就看人用过，换！而且，又模糊又泛泛的，你看我那篇对开头的分析了吗，你这个算是什么背景】 art develops in an impressive humanities, 【in？？an？？】which to us appears as the satisfaction to our visual and acoustical feelings. 【表面了，审美的享受呢，心理的满足呢？】Embedded in people's life but created by few talented persons, art is so pervasive and elusive that it is so difficult to make a squarely assertion about whether the artist and critic gives society something of lasting value. As a non-expert, it is my belief that although it is the artists who created beauty, the role that critics play should not be neglected either.【这样立论比较全面，但是危险是避开了比较，而比较是题目所要求的。看你下面的论证再说吧】

It is undeniable that artists have made great contributions in creating outstanding works and have left the world a great amount of cherished treasures. For example, a great deal of amazing works created in the renaissance【大写】 are still appreciated by today's society, such as Dan Vinci's Mona Lisa's smile, the great sculpture David, and numerous outstanding music and literature works. If these works are mostly prominent for their artistic value, more works also possess their social meanings.【if？？？ 如果这些作品以艺术价值而著称，那么更多的作平也具有社会价值？？？不象话！另外，more用的不对，应该说，艺术品除了这样的价值还有那样的价值。而且，你论点要论述的是艺术家给社会价值而不是艺术品本身。而且，你没有重点提到lasting的问题。再有，社会价值我不认为是艺术家代给社会的主要反面。最后，我不认为这个社会价值的方面能够体现lasting，选择的论据不好】From "Gone with the wind", we can have a complete recognizing of the America Civil War and can comprehend the internal world of people's mind in that very period; while from Stowe's Uncle Tom's cabin, we have the chance to sigh with the sympathy of the American black slavers. All these works are shaped from artists’ ingenious and designing and creating.【前面文艺复兴的例子还可以算是lasting value，飘的例子就没看出来了。而且，你的角度从艺术家跑到了艺术品。好好想想再写】

However, critics play an even more vital role in making the work of art long lasting. 【笨，是value的 lasting不是作品lasting】On one hand, critics are more sensitive and adept than our ordinary people to discover excellent works and understand the connotive meaning of them, and are more professional to analyze the value of a work. 【这句说的还不错】Since art creating is the production of inspire 【这个是动词，检查啊！】and talent, many great works of art will be so abstruse for us to understand and appreciate. 【这个没看出来因果，真正的因果你可以说是艺术表达手段如何如何，所以我们不懂】Without the critics, who are more proficient to these realms, some remarkable works might be ignored by the society.【对于作用说出来了，那么，lasting的问题呢？】 For instance, if critics after Van Gogh's time did not give his work an objective and correct evaluation and introduce them to the society, people in today's world would not have the chance to taste the significant works of such a brilliant person. If the greatest literature work in China“Dream of the Red Chamber” were not studied by some senior scholors and critics and brought to the public by them, perhaps people would not understand the abundant characters and the big background of the story.【唉，一看你就不看书，清朝的时候这书就已经很火了，破例子】 Critics help us in enjoying art and make many efforts in recognizing the value of works of art so that the great works can be accepted by the society and passed down to our offspring.【lasting，lasting，lasting，论点歪了怎么证都不会正确的】

On the other hand, critics can to some extent be the directors of young artists and give some guides which are crucial in their way of growing and developing.【彻底跑了，说什么呢？跟lasting value有什么关系，这个题目不是让你证明在艺术领域两方面谁的贡献大】 Similar to any subjects, art is also knowledge 【is knowledge？？？】for artist to learn, to try and to develop and they need feedbacks of their works so that they can be more skilled and mature in producing notable works. Critics, being close to art and artists, are more likely to bring their suggestions, advices and public's feelings to artists and thus help them accomplishing more and more outstanding works of great value. At the same time, our normal people are lucky enjoy more and more gorgeous paintings, music, literatures and so on.【后面就不看了】

To conclude, as the famous sculptor Rodin once said,” the world is full of beauty unless we have a pair of eyes to discover it", though artists are dedicate to create beauty, what critics do is just discovering beauty and introducing it to all corner of the world so that everyone can deeply understand the worth and the extraordinary meanings of works of art, and therefore the work can be long lasting in the society.

【立论还是有想法的。论点也都可以，论证上一塌糊涂。语法问题也没全部改正。论证论证论证要加强啊！看的没心情，不给你加颜色了】

victoriazhizhiUID: 163135

诶，就知道会是这样。
彻底没主意了。
谢谢鬼，没精神打字了，作工程作业去了。

boancquUID: 165060

zhizhi 的语言实在很不错。佩服！
明天咱也写篇。恭候鬼鬼的打击！

will_foreverUID: 193568

小鬼怎么给zhizhi这么大压力呀，
呵呵，zhizhi，咋们甭管他！

boyjimUID: 125249

楼主一定是上过庄子的课吧...这个开头...我要改模板了...