Argument42 限时写作

bablUID: 190621

argu也写了不少了，可是发现写到最后就一直是这么一个水平了，大家看看能有几分呢？
谢谢！

42The following appeared in a proposal from the economic minister of the        
country of Paraterra.                                                           
                                                                                
"In order to strengthen its lagging economy, last year the government of        
the nearby country of Bellegea began an advertising campaign to promote         
ecologically sound tourism (ecotourism). This year the number of foreign        
visitors arriving at Bellegea's main airport doubled, and per capita income     
in Bellegea increased by ten percent. To provide more income for the            
population of Paraterra and also preserve the natural environment of our        
tiny country, we too should begin to promote ecotourism. To ensure that our     
advertising campaign is successful, we should hire the current director of      
Bellegea's National Tourism Office as a consultant for the campaign."
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In this proposal the author has made an indefensible argument that Paraterra should begin to promote ecotourism just like Bellegea has done and should hire the current director of Bellegea's National Tourism Office as a consultant. Maybe the author has not thoroughly investigated such an issue as there are flaws in the logic used in the argument in spite of several pieces of evidence provided to support the conclusion.

First of all, the author points out that the number of foreign visitors arriving at Bellegea's main airport doubled and per capita income in Bellegea increased by 10 percent. However, these facts do not necessarily imply that the ecotourism in Bellegea is successful. First, it is highly possible that many people arriving at the airport is for business instead of tour. Or they may just stop in Bellegea for another flight to other places. Furthermore, the increase of the per capita income is not necessarily attributable to the ecotourism. Perhaps the business in Bellegea has developed rapidly which leads to the increasing income. If so, these facts would case considerable doubt on the conclusion of the argument that ecotourism in Bellegea appeals more tourists and improves the per capita income of the country.

In the second place, given that the ecotourism in Bellegea is actually a success, the argument's suggestion for Paraterra to simply follow Bellegea is still unwarranted. There lies the possibility that there are not enough natural resource in Paraterra to establish the ecotourism or the natural resources in Paraterra are not as attractive as those of Bellegea. Lacking more information about the similarity between the two countries, the author can not convince me to accept such a suggestion.

Finally, even if the author can substantiate all the foregoing assumptions, the conclusion of the argument to hire the current director of Bellegea's National Tourism Office as a consultant is still dubious. First, the success in Bellegea may not be attributable to the director. Other factors also play an important role. Furthermore, it is quite possible that the director is not familiar with the situation of Paraterra and cannot be competent in his/her job in advertising campaign. Thus the suggestion in the argument is unwise without more detailed investigation.

To sum up, it is entirely possible that the author's conclusion would be indeed corroborative with clearer evidence that the ecotourism in Bellegea is in fact effective to boost the economy of the country and these two countries are relevantly similar. It would also be helpful that the author provide more information about the director of Bellegea's National Tourism Office. But barring these extrinsic evidence which is not included in the argument, there are not enough facts stated to support the conclusion.

fircattyUID: 166248

In this proposal the author has made an indefensible argument that Paraterra should begin to promote ecotourism just like Bellegea has done and should hire the current director of Bellegea's National Tourism Office as a consultant. Maybe the author has not thoroughly investigated such an issue as there are flaws in the logic used in the argument in spite of several pieces of evidence provided to support the conclusion.

First of all, the author points out that the number of foreign visitors arriving at Bellegea's main airport doubled and per capita income in Bellegea increased by 10 percent. However, these facts do not necessarily imply that the ecotourism in Bellegea is successful. First, it is highly possible that many people arriving at the airport isare for business instead of tour. Or they may just stop in Bellegea for another flight to other places. Furthermore, the increase of the per capita income is not necessarily attributable to the ecotourism. Perhaps the business in Bellegea has developed rapidly which leads to the increasing income. If so, these facts would case considerable doubt on the conclusion of the argument that ecotourism in Bellegea appeals more tourists and improves the per capita income of the country.

In the second place, given that the ecotourism in Bellegea is actually a success, the argument's suggestion for Paraterra to simply follow Bellegea is still unwarranted. There lies the possibility that there are not enough natural resourceresources in Paraterra to establish the ecotourism or the natural resources in Paraterra are not as attractive as those of Bellegea. Lacking more information about the similarity between the two countries, the author can not convince me to accept such a suggestion.

Finally, even if the author can substantiate all the foregoing assumptions, the conclusion of the argument to hire the current director of Bellegea's National Tourism Office as a consultant is still dubious. First, the success in Bellegea may not be attributable to the director感觉有点绝对，改成the director may not be the only factor contributing to the success in Bellegea是不是会好一些. Other factors also play an important role. Furthermore, it is quite possible that the director is not familiar with the situation of Paraterra and cannot be competent in his/her job in advertising campaign. Thus the suggestion in the argument is unwise without more detailed investigation.

To sum up, it is entirely possible that the author's conclusion would be indeed corroborative with clearer evidence that the ecotourism in Bellegea is in fact effective to boost the economy of the country and these two countries are relevantly similar. It would also be helpful that the author provide more information about the director of Bellegea's National Tourism Office. But barring these extrinsic evidence which is not included in the argument, there are not enough facts stated to support the conclusion.
我觉得写得很不错，论据很好，只是语言上好像还有点缺陷，比如全文用了两处A may not be attributable to B,两处First,Furthermore,显得很模式化，可以多替换一些词，比如moreover,in addition等等。呵呵，评价的不知道对不对，不对的还请见谅哦

fircattyUID: 166248

嘿嘿，第一次用这里的变色工具~~

bablUID: 190621

非常感谢！
确实写的时候，特别是issue，经常不知道该怎么表达，我觉得真正考的时候很可能会出现无数重复的词。。。。