issue 51同主题6, 大家拍吧,我还是会狠很回拍的!!

枫丹UID: 166492

最初由 猫猫624 发布
[B]粗看了一下,很不错.有些小错,别人大都指出.下篇给你细改.:D
语言朴实,用词也不错思维很紧凑,论证也很到位.这点我觉的比花拳秀腿的文章要很多,也正是gre考察的精髓..向你学..

以下省略...... [/B]

多谢你的鼓励!你的逻辑性和语言都很好.向你学习才是!!
加油哦!!

wanzatheUID: 168928

Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student.

The debate over the effectiveness of education is always a hot topic for many educators. Some of them assert that designing school to meet the individual needs is the only way to make education effective. However, in my point of view, the effective education should not be only responsible for individuals but also the whole society, therefore only by filling students’ needs people can not develop a kind of effective education. 这句话应该是文章的主题句吧，可在文章正文论证的时候，涉及到的方面要超出这句话的内容，感觉可以再完善一下

Firstly, it is true that the interest will generate more motivation driving students to learn and investigate, but fundamental education is equally significant. Through meeting students’ interest, schools can help students explore their full potentials and provide increased chances for them to gain greater successes. However, before education tries its best to meet students' interest, they should make sure whether the interests hold by students are only whims of a moment or a real interests that can last a long time. Because in most cases, some students, especially some children without too delete too much learning experience, can not sense which they really have interests in.can not sense in which they are really interested Therefore, the first function of education is not to cater to students' needs, but to find discover and inspire their real interests. So education should give students more chances to learn different subjects- sample mathematics, physical science, music, art, photography- all aimed at broadening students’ horizons and consequently inspire their fervent interests of them delete of them . Moreover, these fundamental disciplines will furnish students with other abilities which facilitate their future lives. For example, mathematic can teach them reason and logic; music may give their hands to express feelings, and law help them to learn about fairness. Although these kinds of knowledge are not surely their interests, yet they are infinitely necessary for them to prepare them delete them for lives

Secondly, the important delete important purpose of education is not only to develop student's interests, but also to cultivate a group of people who will contribute to the society. Education is not merely delete merely 全文一直没有提到教育是商品，merely不太恰当 commodity supposed to individuals by schools and society. It should be responsible for the development of the society and even the advancement of human beings. So if education just concern about needs of students, it may be true that these students will become the happy one ones living entirely in their interests, but may not become the citizens needed by our society, who should hold values of honesty, fairness, and fidelity to task, family and even the world and ultimately contribute to the stability and progress of the society. Of course, it is not suggested that all the people living in their interests can not become the ones needed by our society. But it is sure that if too much attention is paid to the development of interests, the needs of the society may not be fulfilled best completely.

While, some who oppose this perspective may assert that these fundamental subject and value system may shackle students' spirit to seek to delete to their interests. Admittedly, these education involving value system and fundamental subjects may be not interest interesting enough for these delete students students and seems to waste valuable time. But in our experience, these knowledge and values will turn out to be more beneficial than harmful to students' development of their need and interest. For example, students who hold curiosities in writing computer program programs should furnish equip themselves with solid fundamental knowledge of mathematics and logic. Similarly, a student preferring to music should possess basic reading skills to understand the musical theory in books. As to the value, it will be more crucial because the stable society resulting from the education of the value system will ultimately offer increasing opportunities and better environments for students’ chase of interests.

In sum, interest serves as a power driving students to learn more knowledge quickly and initiatively, but undue emphasis on it will dilute the quality of education. After all our society do not just need a group of people who only hold their own interests, but also a great amount of persons who will contribute to the development of the world.

写的真是很不错，拍砖是不敢，只有我学习的份了。

xuding_godUID: 179213

Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student.
提纲：
我对题目的理解：问题解决型， 满足学生的个人需要和兴趣-》使教育更加有效
观点：尽管兴趣的满足可以给学生更大的动力，但是有效的教育应该是对个人和社会的有效，因此仅仅满足学生的兴趣不能使教育更加有效
1， 兴趣尽管使学生学习有动力，但是基础性的教育，对于他们更为关键。原因是开阔视野，激发兴趣，为将来的打下基础
2， 兴趣的满足尽管可以使学生投入到自己的兴趣中去，但是无法满足社会对公民的要求， 因此要进行价值教育
3， 有人说基础知识和价值教育会舒服学生对自己兴趣的积极性，但是他们利大于弊，因为他们将更好的帮助学生pursue their interests.
The debate over the effectiveness of education is always a hot topic for many educators. Some of them assert that designing school to meet the individual needs is the only way to make education effective. However, in my point of view, the effective education should not be only responsible for individuals but also the whole society, therefore only by filling students’ needs people can not develop a kind of effective education.

Firstly, it is true that the interest will generate more motivation driving students to learn and investigate, but fundamental education is equally significant. Through meeting students’ interest, schools can help students explore their full potentials and provide increased chances for them to gain greater successes. However, before education tries its best to meet students' interest, they should make sure whether the interests hold by students are only whims of a moment or a real interests that can last a long time. Because in most cases, some students, especially some children without too much learning experience, can not sense which they really have interests in. Therefore, the first function of education is not to cater to students' needs, but to find and inspire their real interests. So education should give students more chances to learn different subjects- sample mathematics, physical science, music, art, photography- all aimed at broadening students’ horizons and consequently inspire their fervent interests of them. Moreover, these fundamental disciplines will furnish students with other abilities which facilitate their future lives. For example, mathematic can teach them reason and logic; music may give their hands to express feelings, and law help them to learn about fairness. Although these kinds of knowledge are not surely their interests, yet they are infinitely necessary for them to prepare them for lives 这段写得不错，但是我觉得就兴趣不会长久这个角度入手似乎有点偏了，题目是individual needs and interest,应该是比较强烈的一种延续的渴望吧。

Secondly, the important purpose of education is not only to develop student's interests, but also to cultivate a group of people who will contribute to the society. Education is not merely commodity supposed to individuals by schools and society. It should be responsible for the development of the society and even the advancement of human beings. So if education just concern about needs of students, it may be true that these students will become the happy one living entirely in their interests, but may not become the citizens needed by our society, who should hold values of honesty, fairness, and fidelity to task, family and even the world and ultimately contribute to the stability and progress of the society. Of course, it is not suggested that all the people living in their interests can not become the ones needed by our society. But it is sure that if too much attention is paid to the development of interests, the needs of the society may not be fulfilled best.

While, some who oppose this perspective may assert that these fundamental subject and value system may shackle students' spirit to seek to their interests. Admittedly, these education involving value system and fundamental subjects may be not interest enough for these students and seems to waste valuable time. But in our experience, these knowledge and values will turn out to be more beneficial than harmful to students' development of their need and interest. For example, students who hold curiosities in writing computer program should furnish themselves with solid fundamental knowledge of mathematics and logic. Similarly, a student preferring to music should possess basic reading skills to understand the musical theory in books. As to the value, it will be more crucial because the stable society resulting from the education of the value system will ultimately offer increasing opportunities and better environments for students’ chase of interests.

In sum, interest serves as a power driving students to learn more knowledge quickly and initiatively, but undue emphasis on it will dilute the quality of education. After all our society do not just need a group of people who only hold their own interests, but also a great amount persons who will contribute to development of the world.

觉得写的真的很不错，是限时吗？觉得要好好向楼主学习，逻辑很清楚，而且破题我觉得破得不错。只是but出现的有点多了，特别是在TS中，就给我一种建立好一个观点又马上推翻它的感觉，觉得不是很妥，TS最好表明自己这一段的观点，不要有让步。
以上尽是个人观点，水平有限，不当之处还望谅解。也麻烦楼主看看我的这个同主题的吧
https://bbs.gter.net/showthread.php?s=&threadid=258307

ioiwinUID: 183956

引用:最初由 ioiwin 发布
Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student.
提纲：
我对题目的理解：问?.

以下省略......  

谢谢拍砖!!我该了你的作文,可能拍的有点狠了,毕竟那是你的第一篇,比我的第一篇强多了!!继续加油

辛苦你了, 拍的狠才好,改你的文章学到不少东西,你的逻辑很好,  要多多向你学习 :)

ayrieUID: 128476

写的很好，45min内写到这种水平的话，绝对没有问题

枫丹UID: 166492

觉得要好好向楼主学习，逻辑很清楚，而且破题我觉得破得不错。只是but出现的有点多了，特别是在TS中，就给我一种建立好一个观点又马上推翻它的感觉，觉得不是很妥，TS最好表明自己这一段的观点，不要有让步。

这个建议提的好,不好意思,本来是限时间的,可是写完后,又改了一下.也不算真实发挥吧!!不过我会继续努力的,加油!!

eddiejUID: 200626

Of course, it is not suggested that all the people living in their interests can not become the ones needed by our society 这句话是什么意思？感觉有点不地道，可能是我才疏学浅，呵呵，见笑了，请指点！

likeying27UID: 195699

占个位子,明天来看````
也打算写这篇,互改啊```---------强迫自己写作

枫丹UID: 166492

最初由 eddiej 发布
[B]Of course, it is not suggested that all the people living in their interests can not become the ones needed by our society 这句话是什么意思？感觉有点不地道，可?.

以下省略...... [/B]

While I am not suggesting that all the people living in their interest will ultimatlely become the expected person of the scociety.
这样改好些了?
多谢提醒:)

likeying27UID: 195699

B1 是满足还不行要 扩展兴趣
B2 教育的社会价值
B3  基础教育也重要
感觉B1,B3例子上论证的有点重复.
```````
(上课铃响了,先去上课回来 续写```` :rolleyes: )
回来了``

基础教育可以给我们带来的不仅是物理化学数学吧?
当然你说学计算机要数学基础,音乐的要理论基础,无可厚非.但我觉得还有 其他方面展开:
broad academic and workplace skills :
except basic skill,such as mathematics,writing,reading,listening,speaking
education should also emphasize on people skill,personal qualities,thinking
skill, which interests may not bring us.

语言方面还有待提高,我自己也是这种问题,所以就没有对你的
语言问题加以分析,呵呵,一起努力`````````````
刚刚去看了考场,因为自己一直在做GRE的逃兵,所以回来
既恐惧,又后悔,以我为戒```wish```````````````````````