我的第一篇issue51同主题写作（谢谢了，请大家拍我,必回拍!)

deserteagleUID: 201968

我的第一篇issue,呜呜,憋了一个上午,总算写了
xdjm们尽管把砖头扔过来吧! 谢了
bow一个先
b1:分析兴趣对教育的重要性
b2:写社会需求对教育的重要性,教育不能忽视社会需求
b3:其他方面的影响,如aptitude,偶这段不知道怎么深入下去了
不知道跑题了没?

------题目------
Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student.
------正文------
There is a growing public concern over effective education. Although education which is designed to meet the individual needs and interests would do much good to students, I insist that this education system is not enough to say truly effective.
In the first place, students' potential could be activated by education which is oriented to individual needs and interests. If those students who have interest in arts are forced to learn those subjects such as algebra, calculus, or some other subjects inclined to logic, they will feel boring and fail to learn well. Take one of my friends for example, she majored in electronic engineering. But after two years ‘study she found no interest in electronic engineering then she made a decision that she changed her major from electronic engineering to international business. Now she is enjoying her new major. By contrast, if students are encouraged to learn their favorite subjects, they will make great efforts to learn and then they will be more probably succeeded in their interested subjects than those they dislike. For the similar reasons, individual needs are also important to education.
In the second place, besides individual needs and interests, social needs should be taken into accounted . Social needs include team spirit, corporation, leadership, interpersonal skills and so on. For example, most students will take a job after their graduation. When they work with other people, team spirit is indispensably needed especially when they cooperate with due division of labor. Since they need to communicate with other people and exchange their ideas when they work, team spirit plays a very important role. On the contrary, if we ignore the importance of these social needs, education would be deviated from society and students cultivated from such education system would be not able to charge for their responsibility in society. Now in many universities and colleges in China, there are many projects that encourage undergraduates to take part in activities in companies. Many students who have taken part in these activities do well in their jobs after their graduation.
In the third place, not only be designed to meet the individual needs and interests could take education into effect. People are not born with their interests and we could lead student to their interests. Also we should teach students in accordance with their aptitude. Take Copernicus Nicholas for example, Copernicus learned Latin language in his previous several years of study life. But after he met Prof.BrudzewskiIn who influenced Copernicus very much, Copernicus decided to devote all his life to astronomy ‘research.
In sum, it is very likely that people will never be able to arrive at the same conclusion on the controversial issue, due to their different experiences, and conflicting values. But the above I discussed reasons should in a large sense justify my conclusion that education should not only consider the importance of the individual needs and students’ interests, but also take other aspects such as social needs and students’ aptitude into account.

deserteagleUID: 201968

自己顶一下:)

枫丹UID: 166492

Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student.
------正文------
There is a growing public concern over （about）effective education. Although education which is designed to meet the individual needs and interests would do much good to students, I insist that this education system is not enough to say truly effective.

In the first place, students' potential could be activated by education which is oriented to individual needs and interests. If those students who have interest in arts are forced to learn those subjects such as algebra, calculus, or some other subjects inclined to logic, they will feel boring and fail to learn well. Take one of my friends for example, she majored in electronic engineering. But after two years ‘study she found no interest in electronic engineering then she made a decision that she changed her major from electronic engineering to international business. Now she is enjoying her new major. 这个例子不太好，你并没有说他是否 被active了？enjoy 和active不能等同把？？By contrast, if students are encouraged to learn their favorite subjects, they will make great efforts to learn and then they will be more probably succeeded in their interested subjects than those they dislike. .这个结论没有什么依据，有些想当然， 最好展开说清楚的好。 For the similar reasons, individual needs are also important to education

In the second place, besides individual needs and interests, social needs should be taken into accounted . （句号）Social needs include team spirit, corporation, leadership, interpersonal skills and so on. （可以把上面这两句联起来。）For example,（似乎不是一个例子） most students will take a job after their graduation. When they work with other people, team spirit is indispensably needed especially when they cooperate with due division of labor. Since they need to communicate with other people and exchange their ideas when they work, team spirit plays a very important role. （前面这几句的因果关系要写清楚啊！）On the contrary, if we ignore the importance of these social needs, education would be deviated from society and students cultivated from such education system would be not able to charge for their responsibility in society.（what is responsibility ??你没有交代这和前面的饿team spirit 又是什么关系？） Now in many universities and colleges in China, there are many projects that encourage undergraduates to take part in activities in companies. Many students who have taken part in these activities do well in their jobs after their graduation.后面这一句用来说明什么？

In the third place, not only be designed to meet the individual needs and interests could take education into effect. People are not born with their interests and we could lead student to their interests. Also we should teach students in accordance with their aptitude. Take Copernicus Nicholas for example, Copernicus learned Latin language in his previous several years of study life. But after he met Prof.BrudzewskiIn who influenced Copernicus very much, Copernicus decided to devote all his life to astronomy ‘research.
你是想说兴趣是可以改变的吗？为什么要改变，改变了就可以effective了吗？而且也没有展开的说，这一段比较失败。

In sum, it is very likely that people will never be able to arrive at the same conclusion on the controversial issue, due to their different experiences, and conflicting values.（没什么用处吧？直接总结就好了，个人认为） But the above I discussed reasons should in a large sense justify my conclusion that education should not only consider the importance of the individual needs and students’ interests, but also take other aspects such as social needs and students’ aptitude into account.
你的思路还是清晰的，可是似乎论述的不深入。狸子也没有起到应有的效果。毕竟你的例证应该随时为你的中心服务啊，对不？一家之言！！

deserteagleUID: 201968

谢谢枫丹
我的说理很不够,因果关系也比较混,看来我在这方面要多多努力了