issue10 文艺类 高频 文艺类对我来说很难 希望得到大家指点

sandydmUID: 115774

------题目------
Governments must ensure that their major cities receive the financial support they need in order to thrive, because it is primarily in cities that a nation's cultural traditions are preserved and generated.
------正文------
Every country has her own cultural traditions,most of which are preserved and generated in major cities.So governments should ensure that their major cities receive the financial support they need in order to thrive.And some new cities also should receive financial support for they might have an even faster development than cities which have a long history.In addition,there are some small cities or villages and towns where ulture traditions are generated and handed down,so they also need support from nations of the world.

First,major cities are the places where there are abundant history and character.For example,as we all know ,Beijing,the capital of China,has a very long history where many dynasties existed in their individual section.In Tang dynasty China had her most times of flourish,in the capital of Tang dynasty,Linan,the most wealthy country,people there had not to worry about the food.Also there were most of the literature such as calligraphy,painting ect.Many famous authors and artists living there.In addition,There were many merchants travelling between their countries and Linan.They made the culture and economy communicating and flourish.

Indeed,there are many major cities where there are less culture traditions,but it dosn't mean that the government shouldn't give any financial support to them.It is because that sometime it creates a better environment for development in them than in those cities where long culture traditions are preserved.Citis that have less culture traditions will have a larger room to develop,the government don't have to consider the old buildings or something like this.These cities can be developed into new cities that filled with new ideas.Just like the America,which country full of migrants.All is blank when they move there,they have to build houses,plough the terrants and make what they need by themselves.But these people will receive new ideas easily,they will also generate new thoughts.

Similarly,either small cities,or villages and towns,in spite of not being major cities,are the places where culture traditionas generated and handed down be generations.Not all the villages or towns have the chance to become major cities,but history from the acient time to nowadays existed everywhere,including small villages and towns.But the government have not enough money to give financial support to all.There should be emphasized financial support.

It is true that the government give financial support to major cities where there exists the nation's cultural traditions .To do this the cultural will be preserved and generated continually.But it makes no sense to support all the places which have cultural traditions,because the support should have an emphasize.Also some cities which have not much cultural traditions need to be given support because they have their own developing way.

sandydmUID: 115774

自己顶上来

weinUID: 190374

Every country has her own cultural traditions,most of which are preserved and generated in major cities.So governments should ensure that their major cities receive the financial support they need in order to thrive.（这里转折有点突然）And some new cities also should receive financial support for （that）they might have an even faster development than cities which have a long history.（没看明白）。In addition,there are some small cities or villages and towns where （C）ulture traditions are generated and handed down,so they also need support from nations of the world.（缺少总句。仿佛你的观点在不断的变）。

First,major cities are the places where there are abundant history and character（s）.For example,as we all know ,Beijing,the capital of China,has a very long history where many dynasties existed in their individual section.In Tang dynasty（，） China had her most （flourish）times of flourish（删除，most怎么修饰名词？）,in the capital of Tang dynasty,Linan（哪里？）,the most wealthy country,people there had not to worry about the food.Also there were most of the literature such as calligraphy,painting ect.Many famous authors and artists living there.In addition,There were many merchants travelling between their countries and Linan.They made the culture and economy communicating and flourish.（好象跟北京文化没关系啊。全是LINAN的了）。

（用转折词。On the other hand。However. Nevertheless）
Indeed,there are many major cities where there are less culture traditions,but it dosn't mean that the government shouldn't give any financial support to them.It is because that sometime it creates a better environment for development in them than in those cities where long culture traditions are preserved.（Cities）Citis that have less culture traditions will have a larger room to develop,the government don't have to consider the old buildings or something like this.These cities can be developed into new cities that filled with new ideas.Just like the America,which country full of migrants.All is blank when they move there,they have to build houses,plough the terrants and make what they need by themselves.But these people will receive new ideas easily,they will also generate new thoughts.

Similarly,either small cities,or villages and towns,in spite of not being major cities,are the places where culture traditionas generated and handed down be generations.Not all the villages or towns have the chance to become major cities,but history from the acient time to nowadays existed everywhere,including small villages and towns.But the government have not enough money to give financial support to all.There should be emphasized financial support.（这段扩展得不够，仿佛小城市象国家撒娇，却没有理由来支持）

It is true that the government give financial support to major cities where there exists the nation's cultural traditions .To do this the cultural will be preserved and generated continually.But it makes no sense to support all the places which have cultural traditions,because the support should have an emphasize.Also some cities which have not much cultural traditions need to be given support because they have their own developing way.（总结可以再有力一点）

总评： 思路还是正确的。表达尚欠缺，不过比我好了。加油！

sandydmUID: 115774

谢谢 这就修改