argument211 时间紧张啊紧张啊～～～砍啦！

victoriazhizhiUID: 163135

Argument211  第1篇 吧啦吧啦吧啦拍～～～！！！
------摘要------
作者：吱吱     共用时间：25分2秒     480 words/ 514 words after revised
从2005年4月6日22时0分到2005年4月6日23时25分
------题目------
The following appeared in a memorandum to faculty from the academic vice president of Waymarsh University.
'So that we can better accomplish Waymarsh University's academic goals, we should adopt the job-opportunity (job-op) program offered at Plateau Technical College and strongly encourage all students at Waymarsh to participate in it. The success of the job-op program at Plateau is evident: over the past two years, more than 75% of the freshmen at Plateau have enrolled in the optional job-op program. Moreover, at Plateau, the grades of job-op students are consistently higher than those of other students, 90% of the job-op students receive job offers within a month after their graduation, and most former job-op students report much success in their careers.'
------正文------
In this argument, the author recommends that Waymarsh University should afford the job-op program just as Plateau Technical College does. In order to support his/her assertion, the author cites some fact to demonstrate that the program is successful in Plateau Technical College. However, based on unsubstantial evidence, the argument is not cogent.

Firstly, the author cites a fact that more than 75% of the freshmen at Plateau have enrolled in the optional job-op program to prove that the program is effective, which is not necessarily the case. It might be the case that most of these students choose the class just because it seems fresh to them and they might lose their interests after a short while study. It is also possible that the school forces them to enter the class, but students themselves do not show much interest in it. Without provide more detailed information about how students in the class feel, the author could not reasonably conclude that the program is successful.

Next, the author also cites a fact that grades of students who take the program are consistently higher than those of other students. However, many other factors could lead to higher grade of job-op students. It could be entirely possible that the talent and capability of job-op students are originally better than any other students and they could gain high grades in any kind of class. It also might be the case that even though job-op students have higher grades than other students, their comprehensive qualities are worse than other students and are no preponderant than others.

Thirdly, the author cites a fact that 90% of the job-op students receive job offers within a month after their graduation. However, this evidence would lend to support the argument only if the job of these students if stable and satisfying and students themselves feel to have benefited from the job-op program. However, on evidence is provided to strengthen the argument. It might be the case that although students find their job quickly, they are not satisfied with their jobs or they are not competent for the jobs. Without showing other evidence, the author could not conclude that the program in Plateau is successful.

Finally, even if the job-op program is successful in Plateau, it does not necessarily means that the program works in Waymarsh, either. Lacking of evidence to make it clear what the academic goal of Waymarsh is, the author could not arbitrarily recommend Waymarsh to adopt other college’s program. If the academic goal of Waymarsh is to cultivate students who are capable of science research but not gain employees, job-op program might not make much sense. Unless the author finds the similarity of the two schools, he/she could convince me that the program will help to achieve the academic goal of Waymarsh.

In conclusion, this argument is not persuasive because first the assertion that job-op program is successful in Plateau Technical College is poorly supported, and then the recommendation needs more detailed information to strengthen. Unless the author provides more evidence about the discussed issues, this argument is not convincing.

时间巨不够用，愁死我了，到时间l了还有1句没写上。一堆词都是错的。
:o HELP

PS： 鬼鬼，菠萝，龙非，jim。你们谁有空砍下就可以了，没空算了。
别人的好意先谢谢了，但是偶实在没有时间回拍了，目前还压着2块砖没回呢。

apolloxpUID: 156355

效率蛮高的嘛，一天一篇，明天来看

龙非UID: 193190

占个座。。

龙非UID: 193190

------正文------
In this argument, the author recommends that Waymarsh University should afford the job-op program just as Plateau Technical College does. In order to support his/her assertion, the author cites some fact to demonstrate that the program is successful in Plateau Technical College. However, based on unsubstantial evidence, the argument is not cogent.

Firstly, the author cites a fact that more than 75% of the freshmen at Plateau have enrolled in the optional job-op program to prove that the program is effective, which is not necessarily the case. It might be the case that most of these students choose the class just because it seems fresh to them and they might lose their interests after a short while study. It is also possible that the school forces them to enter the class这个地方很不妥，题目已经说了是optional job－op program, but students themselves do not show much interest in it. Without provide more detailed information about how students in the class feel, the author could not reasonably conclude that the program is successful.批判75%还可以从这些入手：新生参加这个课程可能是因为新生什么都感兴趣，什么都参加了，如果说其他很多选修课，都有百分之八、九十的新生参加，那么75％参加job-op只能说明它并不是很受欢迎。还有如果只有新生参加了，而其他年级的学生都不参加，那么75％的新生占全校学生的比例就很低了。

Next, the author also cites a fact that grades of students who take the program are consistently higher than those of other students. However, many other factors could lead to higher grade of job-op students. It could be entirely possible that the talent and capability of job-op students are originally better than any other students and they could gain high grades in any kind of class. It also might be the case that even though job-op students have higher grades than other students, their comprehensive qualities are worse than other students and are no preponderant than others. 还有可能是参加job-op的条件之一就是要求学生的成绩必须高

Thirdly, the author cites a fact that 90% of the job-op students receive job offers within a month after their graduation. However, this evidence would lend to support the argument only if the job of these students ifis stable and satisfying and students themselves feel to have benefited from the job-op program. However, onno evidence is provided to strengthen the argument. It might be the case that although students find their job quickly, they are not satisfied with their jobs or they are not competent for the jobs. Without showing other evidence, the author could not conclude that the program in Plateau is successful.还可以是没有参加job-op的学生，反而在更短的时间，更大的比例找到工作。还有可能是工作找得快是因为学校名声等的缘故，跟job-op根本没关

Finally, even if the job-op program is successful in Plateau, it does not necessarily means that the program works in Waymarsh, either. Lacking of evidence to make it clear what the academic goal of Waymarsh is, the author could not arbitrarily recommend Waymarsh to adopt other college’s program. If the academic goal of Waymarsh is to cultivate students who are capable of science research but not gain employees, job-op program might not make much sense. Unless the author finds the similarity of the two schools, he/she could convince me that the program will help to achieve the academic goal of Waymarsh.

In conclusion, this argument is not persuasive because first the assertion that job-op program is successful in Plateau Technical College is poorly supported, and then the recommendation needs more detailed information to strengthen. Unless the author provides more evidence about the discussed issues, this argument is not convincing.

朽木白哉UID: 195804

亲~ 哦就不给你看了~~ =w=
嘿嘿~~
+U~~~~

wanggoudanUID: 166988

写得不错！