Issue56 长期vs短期，JJ高频，大家拍啊！

AlierUID: 159518

Issue56  第2篇 让砖头来得更猛烈些吧！
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作者：寄托家园作文版普通用户     共用时间：46分27秒     391 words
从2005年3月8日10时24分到2005年3月8日11时46分
------题目------
Governments should focus more on solving the immediate problems of today rather than trying to solve the anticipated problems of the future.
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How to deal with the relationship between current problems and future possibilities has long been a hot issue mostly discussed. While various people hold various opinions on it, I tend to insist that both of them deserve the effort to solve and the best thing we can do is to find a balance between them.

First, urgent problems we are facing contemporarily undoubtedly need to be paid great attention to solve. There are quite a lot of complex problems we are confronted with now, many of which would do great harm to the society or even impair all human's interests. For example, in modern world, hunger and poverty are still the most eminent problems threatening many relatively poor countries. Without solving such problems as soon as possible to satisfy the most basic needs for those people, the governments of these countries may bear the risk of being upset  and the societal stability is also vulnerable, let alone the future development. Therefore, for these countries, focusing more on finding out solution to immediate problems seems more urgent. Also, those problems threatening world peace should also be paid most attention, as peaceful environment is the basis for any development or progress. Economy will be greatly affected by turmoil and war, and without the support of economy, no solving to the future problems is possible to carry out. Thus, urgent contemporary problems are what we should be concerned with first.

Nevertheless, trying to solve nowadays' problems does not mean totally abandoning the consideration for future. Commonsense tells us that everything is more or less relevant to other things, our behaviors are without exception. What we do now will unavoidably lay influence on the future, which also makes it a responsibility for us to take future into consideration when solving nowadays problems. An appealing example for this is the most focused energy crisis. Actually, if we explore all the energy resources exist nowadays, they may completely fulfill our need currently. However, we can not do that. Why? Because if we do so, the damage we do to the resources as well as the environment will never be able to restored in the future. Similar kind of lesson could be learned from China’s population problem nowadays. Ignoring the possible results for future, previously President Mao’s decision to encourage more offspring to meet the lack of labor at that time causes quite a heavy burden to China now. Therefore, to avoid making such mistakes again, it is essential for us to think of future when carrying out solutions to current problems.

Further, human also distinguishes himself from other animals for his long eyesight, which also decides that thinking for his descendants are quite natural for him in the sake of heritage requirement. Looking back into history, it is human's future vision that leads us to remain living in this world and progress continually. Without trying to foretell the possible calamities we may encounter in the future, we could not make in-time plans to forestall them. Similarly, the current research on other planets, such as the Mars, is also aimed to meet the lack of living space which may possibly happen in the future. Though all these future research or efforts seem irrelevant to our current life, they are in fact quite essential for ensuring us human beings' long-lasting living and progress, which should never be ignored or overlooked.

In sum, human should maintain his virtue of long eyesight instead of only focusing on nowadays. Only by finding the balance point between solving the current problems and future issues could we do the best for human's long living and healthy development on the earth

yogurt4UID: 198389

学习一下^-^

yogurt4UID: 198389

56 Governments should focus more on solving the immediate problems of today rather than trying to solve the anticipated problems of the future.
------正文------
How to deal with the relationship between current problems and future possibilities has long been a hot issue mostly discussed. While various people hold various opinions on it, I tend to insist that both of them deserve the effort to solve and the best thing we can do is to find a balance between them.开头不错。

First, urgent problems we are facing contemporarily undoubtedly need to be paid great attention to solve. There are quite a lot of complex problems we are confronted with now, many of which would do great harm to the society or even impair all human's interests. For example, in modern world, hunger and poverty are still the most eminent 不知道eminent 能不能放在这里 problems threatening many relatively poor countries. Without solving such problems as soon as possible to satisfy the most basic needs for those their people, the governments of these countries may bear the risk of being upset and the societal stability is also vulnerable, let alone the future development. Therefore, for these countries, focusing more on finding out solution to immediate problems seems more 是和谁在比较？urgent. Also, those problems 什么problems? 把这个和下面的turmoil and war 调个位置比较好threatening world peace should also be paid most attention, as peaceful environment is the basis for any development or progress. Economy will be greatly affected by turmoil and war, and without the support of economy, no solving to the future problems is possible to carry out. Thus, urgent contemporary problems are what we should be concerned with first.
第二个例子感觉不太好。说理过了点，without the support of economy…future problem..
都不能说明和平问题是在当前是urgent的。
Nevertheless, trying to solve nowadays' problems does not mean totally abandoning the consideration for future. Commonsense tells us that everything is more or less relevant to other things, our behaviors are without exception. What we do now will unavoidably lay influence on the future, which also makes it a responsibility for us to take future into consideration when solving nowadays problems. An appealing example for this is the most focused energy crisis. Actually, if we explore all the energy resources exist nowadays, they may completely fulfill our need currently. However, we can not do that. Why? Because if we do so, the damage we do to the resources as well as the environment will never be able to restored in the future. 口气很肯定，来个may,might的，你说怎么样 ？Similar 和能源问题不similar,前者只是你的假设和分析，后面的是已经发生的事 kind of lesson could be learned from China’s population problem nowadays. Ignoring the possible results for future, previously President Mao’s decision to encourage more offspring to meet the lack of labor at that time causes quite a heavy burden to China now. Therefore, to avoid making such mistakes again, it is essential for us to think of future when carrying out solutions to current problems.例子很好。

Further, human also distinguishes himself from other animals for his long eyesight, which also decides that thinking for his descendants are quite natural for him in the sake of heritage requirement. 我认为这里的前后两句话意思不是很连贯。可以把decide 后面的内容改一下。Looking back into history, it is human's future vision that leads us to remain living in this world and progress continually. Without trying to foretell the possible calamities we may encounter in the future, we could not make in-time plans to forestall them. Similarly, 意思上应该是for example 才对the current research on other planets, such as the Mars, is also aimed to meet the lack of living space which may possibly happen in the future. Though all these future research researches or efforts seem irrelevant to our current life, they are in fact quite essential for ensuring us human beings' long-lasting living and progress, which should never be ignored or overlooked.
本来要谈人的远见，后面又重复了上一段的内容。

In sum, human should maintain his virtue of long eyesight instead of only focusing on nowadays. Only by finding the balance point between solving the current problems and future issues could we do the best for human's long living and healthy development on the earth结尾最好把你body1的内容带一笔。
写的不错啦~~~加油^-^，

点点滴滴走过UID: 195083

占一个

点点滴滴走过UID: 195083

3 楼的兄弟批的很认真，值得学习

yogurt4UID: 198389

兄弟?!

symphony22UID: 203058

How to deal with the relationship个人感觉relation是不是好点呢？between current problems and future possibilities has long been a hot issue mostly discussed. While various people hold various opinions on iton it?有必要么？, I tend to insist that both of them deserve the effort to solve and the best thing we can do is to find a balance between them.

First, urgent problems we are facing contemporarily undoubtedly need to be paid great attention to solve. There are quite a lot of complex problems we are confronted with好象不该是被动勒？ now, many of which would do great harm to the society or even impair all human's interests. For example, in modern world, hunger and poverty are still the most eminent problems threatening many relatively poor countries. Without solving such problems as soon as possible to satisfy the most basic needs for those people, the governments of these countries may bear the risk of being upset and the societal stability is also vulnerable, let alone the future development. Therefore, for these countries, focusing more on finding out solution to immediate problems seems more urgent. Also, those problems threatening world peace should also be paid most attention, as peaceful environment is the basis for any development or progress. Economy will be greatly affected by turmoil and war, and without the support of economy, no solving to the future problems is possible to carry out. Thus, urgent contemporary problems are what we should be concerned with first.

Nevertheless, trying to solve nowadays' problems does not mean totally abandoning the consideration for future. Commonsense tells us that everything is more or less relevant to other things, our behaviors are without exception.这个说法读起来也不是特别爽 What we do now will unavoidably lay influence on the future, which also makes it a responsibility for us to take future into consideration when solving nowadays problems. An appealing example for this is the most focused energy crisis. Actually, if we explore all the energy resources exist nowadays, they may completely fulfill our need currently. However, we can not do that. Why? Because if we do so, the damage we do to the resources as well as the environment will never be able to restored in the future. Similar kind of lesson could be learned from China’s population problem nowadays. Ignoring the possible results for future, previously President Mao’s decision to encourage more offspring to meet the lack of labor at that time causes quite a heavy burden to China now. Therefore, to avoid making such mistakes again, it is essential for us to think of future when carrying out solutions to current problems.

Further, human also distinguishes himself from other animals for his long eyesight, which also decides that thinking for his descendants are quite natural for him in the sake of heritage requirement. Looking back into history, it is human's future vision that leads us to remain living in this world and progress continually. Without trying to foretell the possible calamities we may encounter in the future, we could not make in-time plans to forestall them. Similarly, the current research on other planets, such as the Mars, is also aimed to meet the lack of living space which may possibly happen in the future. Though all these future research or efforts seem irrelevant to our current life, they are in fact quite essential for ensuring us human beings' long-lasting living and progress, which should never be ignored or overlooked. 感觉有点粘，层次不是特别清楚

In sum, human should maintain his virtue of long eyesight instead of only focusing on nowadays. Only by finding the balance point between solving the current problems and future issues could we do the best for human's long living and healthy development on the earth


文章总体感觉还是不错，但就是有点粘，我才看了你上一篇，似乎那篇better 点哦！：P

symphony22UID: 203058

------题目------
Governments should focus more on solving the immediate problems of today rather than trying to solve the anticipated problems of the future.
------正文------
How to deal with the relationship between current problems and future possibilities has long been a hot issue mostly discussedhas been a hot issue mostly discussed for a lon time. While various people hold various opinions , I tend to insist that both of them deserve the 不用the 了effort to solve and the best thing有点中文的痕迹~ we can do is to find a balance between them.

First, urgent problems we are facing contemporarily undoubtedly修饰语有点多了吧 needis 否则这个句子没谓语了 to be paid great attention to solve. There are quite a lot of complex problems we are confronted with now, many of which would do great harm to the society or even impair all human's interests.这句写得不错！层层推进的感觉 For example, in modern world, hunger and poverty are still the most eminent problems threatening many relatively poor countries. Without solving such problems as soon as possible to satisfy the most basic needs for those people,这个句子好象有点语法问题 the governments of these countries may beartake the risk of being upset and the societal stability is also vulnerable, let alone the future development. Therefore, for these countries, focusing more on finding out solutions to immediate problems seems more urgent. Also, those problems threatening world peace should also be paid most attention, as peaceful environment is the basis for any development or progress. 这个地方感觉有点断了，最好加个词衔接一下Economy will be greatly affected by turmoil and war, and without the support of economy, no solving to the future problems is possible to carry out. Thus, urgent contemporary problems are what we should be concerned with first.

Nevertheless, trying to solve nowadays' problems does not mean totally abandoning the consideration for future.这句也写得不错！ Commonsense tells us that everything is more or less relevant to other things后面这个things 不要了，改成others, our behaviors are without exception. What we do now will unavoidably lay influence on the future, which also makes it a responsibility for us to take future into consideration when solving nowadays problems. 这段到此都在说一个意思，好象有点重复An appealing example for this is the most focused energy crisis. Actually, if we explore all the energy resources exist nowadays, they may completely fulfill our need currently. However, we can not do that. Why? the damage we do to the resources as well as the environment will never be able to restored in the future. Similar kind of lesson中文痕迹~ could be learned from China’s population problem nowadayscurrent population problem似乎更顺口点 ：P. Ignoring the possible results for future, previously President Mao’s decision to encourage more offspring to meet the lack of labor at that time causes quite a heavy burden to China now. Therefore, to avoid making such mistakes again, it is essential for us to think of future when carrying out solutions to current problems.
这句论证长期利益，例子很贴切，论证也很充分，但是入题时稍显罗嗦

Further, human also distinguishes himself from other animals for his long eyesight, which also decides that thinking for his descendants are quite natural for him in the sake of heritage requirement. Looking back into history, it is human's future vision that leads us to remain living in this world and progress continually.GOOD！ Without trying to foretell the possible calamities we may encounter in the future, we could not make in-time plans to forestall them. Similarly, the current research on other planets, such as the Mars, is also aimed to meet the lack of living space which may possibly happen in the future. Though all these future research or efforts seem irrelevant to our current life, they are in fact quite essential for ensuring us human beings' long-lasting living and progress, which should never be ignored or overlooked.

In sum, human should maintain his virtue of long eyesight instead of only focusing on nowadays后面似乎少了宾语. Only by finding the balance pointpoint多余 between solving the current problems and future issues could we do the best for human's long living and healthy development on the earth

思路清晰，论证有力，我个人特别喜欢中国人口那个例子哈！

zoesmileUID: 198494

个人感觉relation是不是好点呢？
relation 和relationship 有什么区别？
觉得写的好好，我要学习