寄托天下
查看: 3297|回复: 3

[a习作temp] Argument38 鱼和感冒 高频12次 [复制链接]

Rank: 4

声望
0
寄托币
965
注册时间
2004-9-9
精华
1
帖子
3
发表于 2005-4-10 09:13:52 |显示全部楼层
38,The following memo appeared in the newsletter of the West Meria Public Health Council.
'An innovative treatment has come to our attention that promises to significantly reduce absenteeism in our schools and workplaces. A study reports that in nearby East Meria, where fish consumption is very high, people visit the doctor only once or twice per year for the treatment of colds. Clearly, eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent colds. Since colds are the reason most frequently given for absences from school and work, we recommend the daily use of Ichthaid, a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil, as a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeism.'

In this argument the speaker concludes that the daily use of Ichthaid, a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil, is an innovational treatment to prevent colds and lower absenteeism. To justify this conclusion the speaker point out that eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent colds, and that colds are the main reason of absenteeism from school and work. I find this argument specious on several grounds.

Fist, the argument above is weakened by the fact that the nearby East Meria has high fish consumption and the rare visit to the doctor does not necessarily prove that eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent colds. Both high fish consumption and the rare visit to the doctor are just phenomenon happened in the same place, East Meria. It is entirely possible that most people in East Meria are healthy because healthy gene transported from generation to generation. It may, in fact, be the healthy gene that keeps them out of the hospital. Also, the statistics above is base only on data from East Meria complaints who visited the doctor. There may be an ancestral treatment of colds, popular in East Meria, and it is simple and effective even without the doctor’s help. Without considering these possible complaints, the speaker cannot reasonably rely on these statistics to support the claim that eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent colds.

Secondly, the speaker also relies on the assumption that Ichthaid, a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil, is the effective material to prevent colds. It is at least necessary to show clinical proof that Ichthaid is the useful material, how effective the Ichthaid acts. The methods of pick-up Ichthaid will also influence the effectiveness of Ichthaid then weaken this innovational treatment. An experiment is needed to test the effectiveness of Ichthaid by grouping into those using Ichthaid more than one year, those using Ichthaid but less than one year, those never using Ichthaid. Before people are encouraged to use Ichthaid, convinced evidences and a more complete understanding of the effectiveness and benefit provided by Ichthaid should be required.

Finally, there is absolutely no evidence provided that colds are the reason frequently given for absences from school and work. For example, with the careless management in schools and companies, students and workers have formed the habitat of cheat. It is seems that colds are really the reason of high absenteeism rate, and overlook the potential harm of lax management. While the use of Ichthaid is a good way to prevent colds, the absenteeism will not be lower before we find the key problem.

In sum, the recommendation for the daily use of Ichthaid is not well supported. To strengthen it the author must assure me that Ichthaid is the effective material of fish to prevent colds. To better assess the argument it would be useful to know all the possible cases of the cure methods of colds.

4,29        成都,必回拍
我会用心拍你的作文,以感谢你的帮助

Issure30 同主题十一 非主流领域
https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mod=viewthread&tid=263757

Argument38 鱼和感冒
https://bbs.gter.net/forum.php?mod=viewthread&tid=263758

Issure30 同主题十 技术进步与休闲时间
https://bbs.gter.net/showthread.p ... 1352670#post1352670

使用道具 举报

Rank: 6Rank: 6

声望
0
寄托币
7851
注册时间
2005-2-15
精华
2
帖子
1
发表于 2005-4-10 17:45:31 |显示全部楼层
占座
今天累死我了。。。。= =|||||||
还好都过了。。。。

使用道具 举报

Rank: 4

声望
0
寄托币
965
注册时间
2004-9-9
精华
1
帖子
3
发表于 2005-4-10 20:28:58 |显示全部楼层

回复:朽木白哉

也在同主题十一占个坐哈!
今天大家一起堕落...

使用道具 举报

Rank: 6Rank: 6

声望
0
寄托币
7851
注册时间
2005-2-15
精华
2
帖子
1
发表于 2005-4-13 20:43:47 |显示全部楼层
38,The following memo appeared in the newsletter of the West Meria Public Health Council.
'An innovative treatment has come to our attention that promises to significantly reduce absenteeism in our schools and workplaces. A study reports that in nearby East Meria, where fish consumption is very high, people visit the doctor only once or twice per year for the treatment of colds. Clearly, eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent colds. Since colds are the reason most frequently given for absences from school and work, we recommend the daily use of Ichthaid, a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil, as a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeism.'

In this argument the speaker concludes that the daily use of Ichthaid, a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil, is an innovational treatment to prevent colds and lower absenteeism. To justify this conclusion the speaker point out that eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent colds, and that colds are the main reason of absenteeism from school and work. [那天也讲了下 可以不要的 你再翻翻imong讲的] I find this argument specious on several grounds.

[Fist], the argument above is weakened by the fact that the nearby East Meria has high fish consumption and the rare visit to the doctor does not necessarily prove that eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent colds.[直接指出他们没有因果关系] Both high fish consumption and the rare visit to the doctor are just phenomenon happened in the same place, East Meria. It is entirely possible that most people in East Meria are healthy because healthy gene transported from generation to generation. It may, in fact, be the healthy gene that keeps them out of the hospital. Also [even if ….], the statistics above is base only on data from East Meria complaints who visited the doctor. There may be an ancestral treatment of colds, popular in East Meria, and it is simple and effective even without the doctor’s help. Without considering these possible complaints, the speaker cannot reasonably rely on these statistics to support the claim that eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent colds.

Secondly, the speaker also relies on the assumption [fails to assumption…..第一句应该直接指出问题 而不要再去说作者说了什么] that Ichthaid, a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil, is the effective material to prevent colds. It is at least necessary to show clinical proof that Ichthaid is the useful material, how effective the Ichthaid acts. The methods of pick-up Ichthaid will also influence the effectiveness of Ichthaid then weaken this innovational treatment. An experiment is needed to test the effectiveness of Ichthaid by grouping into those using Ichthaid more than [one year,为什么是一年?] those using Ichthaid but less than one year, those never using Ichthaid. Before people are encouraged to use Ichthaid, convinced evidences and a more complete understanding of the effectiveness and benefit provided by Ichthaid should be required.

Finally, there is absolutely no evidence provided that colds are the reason frequently given for absences from school and work. For example, with the careless management in schools and companies, students and workers have formed the habitat of cheat. [It is seems that colds are really the reason of high absenteeism rate, and overlook the potential harm of lax management.罗嗦了] While the use of Ichthaid is a good way to prevent colds, the absenteeism will not be lower before we find the key problem.

In sum, the recommendation for the daily use of Ichthaid is not well supported. To strengthen it the author must assure me that Ichthaid is the effective material of fish to prevent colds. To better assess the argument it would be useful to know all the possible cases of the cure methods of colds.

[思路还不是很清晰 可以先写好提纲 一步步该怎么论证
++UU~~亲]

使用道具 举报

RE: Argument38 鱼和感冒 高频12次 [修改]

问答
Offer
投票
面经
最新
精华
转发
转发该帖子
Argument38 鱼和感冒 高频12次
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-263758-1-1.html
复制链接
发送
回顶部