Argument46，grizzly bear，据说有点难写。。

AlierUID: 159518

Argument46: 462 words   30 minutes
题目：
Although black bears are common in the eastern Canadian province of Labrador, grizzly bears—often similar in color, but much larger—were believed to exist only in the western provinces. Despite a nineteenth-century explorer's account of having startled and narrowly escaped from a grizzly bear deep in the woods in Labrador, modern scientists find no physical evidence that grizzly bears have ever lived in Labrador. But recent research into the language and legends of the Innu, a people who have lived in Labrador for thousands of years, reveals that their language has words for two different kinds of bears, and their ancient legends attribute different characteristics to the two kinds of bears. Therefore, there probably were grizzly bears in Labrador, and the explorer's account probably accurately identified the bear.
正文：
In this argument, the author concludes that grizzly bears might live in Labrador and he also shows a belief in the authentication of the explorer's description of the bear in his account. While it may seems to be reasonable judgment on the first glance, careful examination from many other angles reveals several vital flaws in its presentation, which makes the conclusion unconvincing.

To begin with, the author fails to provide us any indication that the two bears referred in the Innu research are grizzly bear and black bear. It is only mentioned that Innu people has words for two kinds of bear, but there are many explanations to this. It is possible the words were just made up to identify the animals in their imaginary, perhaps fictional totem of them. Besides, there are many other kinds of bears in the world except grizzly bear and black bear, such as the arctic bear, then there is possibility their words were describing these kinds of bears rather than the grizzly bear. Further, the problem of evolution should also be took into consideration. Perhaps the bears symbolized by the words extinct long ago and thus could not be grizzly bears still existing now. Therefore, without more detailed inspection of the Innu description of the bears in their words, we could not hastily think they referred to grizzly bear.

Even accepting the Innu people do describe grizzly bear, it does not necessarily follow that the bear was in Labrador. Firstly, though the Innu people lived there for thousands of years, they might live somewhere before that time. Without providing the time when their words about bears created, it is possible that the words were used to record the bears they encountered before moving to Labrador. Also, as empirical experience tells us, primitive people always lived by hunting. Then it is entirely possible their words were depicting what they saw when hunting in other places out of Labrador.

Finally, it is hasty for the author to believe in the accuracy of the description of grizzly bear in the explorer's account. At the first place, the detail of the explorer's description of grizzly bear is not given in the argument and we could not judge if the features it describes are the same as that of a grizzly bear. Even if the description is indeed of a grizzly bear, the authentication of the account is also open to doubt. Maybe the story of escaping from a bear was just made up by the explorer to make his account more attracting. Or perhaps he was so nervous in the urgent situation that he could not remember clearly the appearance of the bear pursuing him.

In sum, the conclusion is neither persuasive nor convincing. To justify his judgment, the author needs to do more careful research in the Innu words of bears and rule out all other alternative explanations.

ps：时间到的时候最后一段还没有写完，后来补了一句的。：）

鬼谷子UID: 159645

Argument46: 462 words 30 minutes
题目：
Although black bears are common in the eastern Canadian province of Labrador, grizzly bears—often similar in color, but much larger—were believed to exist only in the western provinces. Despite a nineteenth-century explorer's account of having startled and narrowly escaped from a grizzly bear deep in the woods in Labrador, modern scientists find no physical evidence that grizzly bears have ever lived in Labrador. But recent research into the language and legends of the Innu, a people who have lived in Labrador for thousands of years, reveals that their language has words for two different kinds of bears, and their ancient legends attribute different characteristics to the two kinds of bears. Therefore, there probably were grizzly bears in Labrador, and the explorer's account probably accurately identified the bear.
正文：
In this argument, the author concludes that grizzly bears might live in Labrador and he also shows a belief in the authentication of the explorer's description of the bear in his account. While it may seems to be reasonable judgment on the first glance, careful examination from many other angles reveals several vital flaws in its presentation, which makes the conclusion unconvincing. 【似乎注意到要避免restate，但是对于非restate的内容，自己的观点的内容还是有些不够的】

To begin with, the author fails to provide us any indication that the two bears referred in the Innu research are grizzly bear and black bear. It is only mentioned that Innu people has words for two kinds of bear, but there are many 【other possible】explanations to this. It is possible the words were just made up to identify the animals in their imaginary, perhaps fictional totem of them. Besides, there are many other kinds of bears in the world except grizzly bear and black bear, such as the arctic bear, then there is possibility their words were describing these kinds of bears rather than the grizzly bear. 【这里说的有一点问题，应该说，这个地区可能还有其他的熊，不是说世界还有其他的熊，比如说，中国东北的熊，他们肯定就没见过，严密一点。其实也可以说，Innu人可能以前迁徙过，到过其他的地方，或者其他民族的文化对于他们的语言有过影响，所以，很可能这里对于熊的描述是其他地方，其他民族的熊】Further, the problem of evolution should also be took into consideration. Perhaps the bears symbolized by the words extinct long ago and thus could not be grizzly bears still existing now. 【这个想法有意思】Therefore, without more detailed inspection of the Innu description of the bears in their words, we could not hastily think they referred to grizzly bear.

Even accepting the Innu people do describe grizzly bear, it does not necessarily follow that the bear was in Labrador. 【这两段这样设置感觉不错】Firstly, though the Innu people lived there for thousands of years, they might live somewhere before that time. Without providing the time when their words about bears created, it is possible that the words were used to record the bears they encountered before moving to Labrador. Also, as empirical experience tells us, primitive people always lived by hunting. Then it is entirely possible their words were depicting what they saw when hunting in other places out of Labrador.

Finally, it is hasty for the author to believe in the accuracy of the description of grizzly bear in the explorer's account. At the first place, the detail of the explorer's description of grizzly bear is not given in the argument and we could not judge if the features it describes are the same as that of a grizzly bear. Even if the description is indeed of a grizzly bear, the authentication of the account is also open to doubt. Maybe the story of escaping from a bear was just made up by the explorer to make his account more attracting. Or perhaps he was so nervous in the urgent situation that he could not remember clearly the appearance of the bear pursuing him.

In sum, the conclusion is neither persuasive nor convincing. To justify his judgment, the author needs to do more careful research in the Innu words of bears and rule out all other alternative explanations.

  【这个题目中包括两个结论，所以衔接上面论述上面有些难度，我觉得你的B1B2的设置还是不错的，开头再构思构思。加油！】  

疯子兔八哥UID: 196616

明天考完就帮你看看
呵呵

yogurt4UID: 198389

我也来学习一下

AlierUID: 159518

Thank 楼上的 all ！
to 鬼鬼：开头避免restate是指要稍微换写一下，还是完全不要重述作者的结论呢？bow～
to 疯子兔八哥：等到你的JJ哦～,对了，还有你的砖，考完了多来砸哈！！

yogurt4UID: 198389

In this argument, the author concludes that grizzly bears might live in Labrador and he or she also shows a belief in the authentication of the explorer's description of the bear in his account. While it may seems to be reasonable judgment on the first glance, careful examination from many other angles reveals several vital flaws in its presentation, which makes the conclusion unconvincing.
你的阿狗和issue的开头都很简洁。不过，我不喜欢while后面的那句。本来就是一个阿狗必备的形式化的东西，用一句这么长的，好浪费资源啊。
To begin with, the author fails to provide us any indication that the two bears referred in the Innu research are grizzly bear and black bear. It is only mentioned that Innu people has words for two kinds of bear, but there are many explanations to this. It is possible that the words were just made up to identify the animals in their imaginary, perhaps fictional totem of them. Besides, there are many other kinds of bears in the world except grizzly bear and black bear, such as the arctic bear, then there is possibility their words were describing these kinds of bears rather than the grizzly bear. Further, the problem of evolution should also be took taken into consideration. Perhaps the bears symbolized by the words extinct
我查了一下，extinct 是形容词，你是不是把它活用了 long ago and thus could not be grizzly bears still existing now. Therefore, without more detailed inspection of the Innu description of the bears in their words, we the arguercould not hastily think they referred to grizzly bear.反例很充足

Even accepting the Innu people do describe grizzly bear, it does not necessarily follow that the bear was in Labrador. Firstly, though the Innu people lived there for thousands of years, they might live somewhere else before that time. Without providing the time when their words about bears created, it is possible that the words were used to record the bears they encountered before moving to Labrador. Also, as empirical experience tells us, primitive people always lived by hunting. Then it is entirely possible their words were depicting what they saw when hunting in other places out of Labrador.

Finally, it is hasty for the author to believe in the accuracy of the description of grizzly bear in the explorer's account. At the first place, the detail of the explorer's description of grizzly bear is not given in the argument and ,thus we could not judge if the features it describes are the same as that of a grizzly bear. Even if the description is indeed of a grizzly bear, the authentication of the account is also open to doubt. Maybe the story of escaping from a bear was just made up by the explorer to make his account more attracting attractive. Or perhaps he was so nervous in the urgent situation that he could not remember clearly the appearance of the bear pursuing him. mistook a black bear for grizzly bear. Similar in color…

In sum, the conclusion is neither persuasive nor convincing. To justify his judgment, the author needs to do more careful research in the Innu words of bears and rule out all other alternative explanations.
汗…..例子好多，我要学习。非要提意见的话，觉得结尾写如何使阿狗更有说服力的地方可以再写两句。不知道是我阿狗拍地少了，还是jj写的好了，看了又看都看不出问题来。