寄托天下
查看: 897|回复: 2

[a习作temp] Argument 2Baxia 第七次作业Anny [复制链接]

Rank: 5Rank: 5

声望
30
寄托币
2972
注册时间
2006-1-21
精华
0
帖子
19
发表于 2006-2-10 20:34:39 |显示全部楼层
Argument 很少有人写呀!!
argument2

The following appeared in a letter sent by a committee of homeowners from the Deerhaven Acres to all homeowners in Deerhaven Acres.
"Seven years ago, homeowners in nearby Brookville community adopted a set of restrictions on how the community's yards should be landscaped and what colors the exteriors of homes should be painted. Since then, average property values have tripled in Brookville. In order to raise property values in Deerhaven Acres, we should adopt our own set of restrictions on landscaping and housepainting."

提纲:攻击点:
1。 类比错误,邻近的城市和我们城市。
2。 因果关系过于简单,不一定就是颜色布局的限制而导致的房价上涨。
3。 七年前,不一定就是将来一成不变的。
4。 这样的改变就只有颜色限制着一种解决方法。



In this letter, a committee of the Deerhaven Acres (DA) homeowners arrives at the conclusion that the owner of the DA should follow certain restriction of landscaping and house painting in order to enhance property values. In support of the prediction, the speaker claims that the average property values have tripled because they adopted the similar restrictions seven years ago. This argument rests on a serious of unsubstantiated assumptions, and is therefore unpersuasive as it stands.

To begin with, the first reason rests on the assumption that what has happened in nearby Brookvile (B) is analogous to what will happen in DA. This is weak; the author assumes that only relevant difference between B and DA is the location. If this were the case, the speaker's recommendation would be apt. However, there are many dissimilar as well, for examples, climate, population, custom and commercial. If all these conditions are all the same between B and DA, this could go a long way toward concluding the assumption mentioned above.

In the second place, no evidence has been offered to support the assumption that the reason the average property values tripled was the restriction while perhaps the restriction is important contributing factor to the average rise; it is not the only factor. Many other reasons such as the inside layout, scene, secure, preferential treatment and so on, could just likely account for the rise. Lacking a detailed analysis of the reasons the restriction succeeded, it would be foolish to attribute average property rise to the restriction.

In the third place, assuming that seven years ago, B community's average property values had tripled, and in the future while DA makes the same restriction, it will undoubtedly raise property values. People in DA might have entirely different tastes today, they hope to differ themselves from others, especially in house painting. Most of them want to buy the house that is allowed to design the colors of the exteriors by them. Lacking credible evidence that making restriction of colors would continue to attract people to buy the house, the speaker's recommendation cannot persuade me to adopt it.

Finally, even the restriction still can make profit in the future, there exist many other ways to solve this problem. DA can raise property values through special scene, secure system, preferential treatments and so on.

To sum up, the speaker fails to validate the conclusion that DA should adopt their own set of restrictions on landscaping and house painting in order to raise property values. The speaker should provide more evidence to solidify this argument.

使用道具 举报

Rank: 3Rank: 3

声望
0
寄托币
415
注册时间
2003-11-15
精华
0
帖子
0
发表于 2006-2-11 21:32:15 |显示全部楼层
提纲:攻击点:
1。 类比错误,邻近的城市和我们城市。
2。 因果关系过于简单,不一定就是颜色布局的限制而导致的房价上涨。
3。 七年前,不一定就是将来一成不变的。
4。 这样的改变就只有颜色限制着一种解决方法。
In this letter, a committee of the Deerhaven Acres (DA) homeowners arrives at the conclusion that the owner of the DA should follow certain restriction of landscaping and house painting in order to enhanceenhance一般是指增强,这里用raise就可以 property values. In support of the prediction, the speaker claims that the average property values have tripled加上in brookvile because they adopted the similar restrictions seven years ago. This argument rests on a serious of unsubstantiated assumptions, and is therefore unpersuasive as it stands.

To begin with, the first reason rests on the assumption that what has happened in nearby Brookvile (B) is analogous to what will happen in DA应该调换一下位置,what will happen in DA is analogous to what has happened in nearby Brookvile (B) ,这样比较符合一般的表达习惯 . This is weak; the author assumes that only relevant difference between B and DA is the location. If this were the case, the speaker's recommendation would be apt. However, there are many dissimilardissimilar是形容词哦 as well, 这里可以用句号,否则一个句子太长了for examplesFor example, climate, population, custom and commercial. If all these conditions are all the same between B and DA, this could go a long way toward concluding the assumption mentioned above.
这样的论证我觉得说服性不够强,最好具体的举一些例子,比如:B的环境好,交通方便等等。既有说服力,也可以凑字数-_-!

In the second place, no evidence has been offered to support the assumption that the reason 加上based on whichthe average property values tripled was the restriction while perhaps the restriction is important contributing factor to the average rise; it is not the only factor. Many other reasons such as the inside layout, scene, securesecure是动词, preferential treatment and so on, could just likely account for the rise. Lacking a detailed analysis of the reasons the restriction succeeded, it would be foolishfoolish不太好,unreasonable to attribute average property rise to the restriction.

In the third place, assuming that seven years ago, B community's average property values had tripled, and in the future while DA makes the same restriction, it will undoubtedly raise property values. People in DA might have entirely different tastes today, they hope to differ themselves from others, especially in house painting. Most of them want to buy the house that is allowed to design the colors of the exteriors by them. Lacking credible evidence that making restriction of colors would continue to attract people to buy the house, the speaker's recommendation cannot persuade me把me换成homeowners比较好,因为信是写给他们的 to adopt it.

Finally, even the restriction still can make profit in the future, there exist many other ways to solve this problem. DA can raise property values through special scene, secure system, preferential treatments and so on.

To sum up, the speaker fails to validate the conclusion that DA should adopt their own set of restrictions on landscaping and house painting in order to raise property values. The speaker should provide more evidence to solidify this argument.

条理上来说很清楚,如果在驳论的部分有更具体一点的例子就好了。
3.13--原来一回头就是奇迹

使用道具 举报

Rank: 5Rank: 5

声望
30
寄托币
2972
注册时间
2006-1-21
精华
0
帖子
19
发表于 2006-2-12 20:50:46 |显示全部楼层

谢谢

谢谢coco

使用道具 举报

RE: Argument 2Baxia 第七次作业Anny [修改]

问答
Offer
投票
面经
最新
精华
转发
转发该帖子
Argument 2Baxia 第七次作业Anny
https://bbs.gter.net/thread-405381-1-1.html
复制链接
发送
回顶部