argumeng147 【越洋农场】第四周慢组

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2.ARGUMENT 147*
147The following appeared in an editorial in a business magazine.
9:08-9:47
Word: 445

"Although the sales of Whirlwind video games have declined over the past two years, a recent survey of video-game players suggests that this sales trend is about to be reversed. The survey asked video-game players what features they thought were most important in a video game. According to the survey, players prefer games that provide lifelike graphics, which require the most up-to-date computers. Whirlwind has just introduced several such games with an extensive advertising campaign directed at people 10 to 25 years old, the age-group most likely to play video games. It follows, then, that the sales of Whirlwind video games are likely to increase dramatically in the next few months."

According to a recent survey, the author in this argument asserts that the sales of Whirlwind video games are possible to increase dramatically in the next few months by introducing some games favored by the video-game players. Close scrutiny of the survey, however, reveals that it lends little credible support to the author’s claim.

The major problem with this argument is that the author makes his assertion on the basis of an unconvincing survey. The author dose not provide us with any details of the survey, such as the age level of the people be interviewed, the areas they live and money they spend on buying video games. Without these and other necessary information about the survey, it is unconvincing to draw any conclusion from the survey, let alone to assert that the introduction of new games can enhance the sale of video games.

Another problem with the argument is that the author fails to take into account the facts that there are many factors serve to the sale-declining. It is entirely possible that Whirlwind already has some games that attract most of the game players, but due to the management of the company, the sale strategies and the competition with other companies, its sale of video games declines. Therefore, until the author make sure that is the games they sale contribute to the sale-decline, it is so early to assert that introduction of new games can help the sale.

Moreover, even assuming that the recent survey is credible and introduction of new games can reverse the decline trend of sale, the scant evidence provided by the author still insufficiently substantiate that the sale will improve. Since the author dose not provide us any evidence that people 10 to 25 like this kind of games and own enough money to buy these games, it is doubtful that the advertising campaign directed at them will help the sale. What more, as the author says，the game they introduced require the most up-to-date computers, it is equally possible that most people in this area do not possess computers up-to-date enough to play the games.

All in all, the author makes his recommendation on the questionable survey and fails to account for the alternative explanations for the sale-decline so that render the argument unconvincing as it stands. To bolster the argument, the author should provide us with more details of the survey which will validate that people do like that kind of games and are willing to spend money on them. To better assess the argument, I need to know not only the real reasons of the sale-decline in the past two years but also the competition Whirlwind will meet after introd


限时失败原因：长期未练打字，速度大减，出错率直线上升。
感觉这篇argu写得不好，好像总是没有触及根本。字数也少了些。
修改时也没能解决问题。因为好像已经定型了。
不应该太匆匆下笔的。
大家帮我看看吧！

[ 本帖最后由 huhu_zsu 于 2006-6-25 10:27 编辑 ]