issue150 Smile-B组 第五次作业，欢迎批评，谢谢！

vitaminxixiUID: 2159890

TOPIC: ISSUE150 - "Because of television and worldwide computer connections, people can now become familiar with a great many places that they have never visited. As a result, tourism will soon become obsolete."


1. modern technology provide a colorful and board world
2. tourism keep people attack with the true world
    relaxation
    local culture
    economical faction
3. attractive introduction intrigue people to the great sort and will boom tourism

  When some idea or implement can't keep its pace with the developing circumscribe, it is obsolete. Whether tourism gradually loses its impact in people's life in the modern society and will soon been took place is a concerning issue. In my opinion, tourism still has its special faction and it will boom with the improvement of society.
  Admittedly, the modern technologies, such as television and worldwide computer connections, provide people a colorful and broad world according to vivid images. The Albs at distance show their     spectacularity in front of you. The Danube covering thousands of miles flows under your eyes. The TV set brings the whole world to your house, and you can touch any place without undergoing the boring time spent in train and flight. The scenes cover from our ancestors' life to the fashion of modern society, from    pyramid in ancient Egypt to  Alaska       in West, and some extremely special places such as Arctic where general people wouldn't imagine to arrive as well. What's more, the modern technology not only creates a window as a mirror of the colorful world, it also ornament the prospect by adding relevant information to make the scene more attractive and abundant. For instance, the program 'Discovery' reveals some mystery    tombs and introduces the contexts of them about the host and some archeologists who have secretly dead after they uncover    the tombs   in human history. These attractive story and abundant introduction intrigue our curiosity and save our time in searching for the relevant information about it in books. Also, the introducing process is carried out only in home at our spare time of daily          life.
    Nonetheless, tourism still has its place in people's life for it not only covers beautiful previsions but serve as leisure of life. Every people in modern society lives a tension life at the hands of new technologies. Supposing that after a whole day spent in front of computer, would any people wants to get some superficial images by continuously watching the screen? To some extent, the pressure ascribe to modern technology plays a byproduct that is the    boredom of people. Then if the corporation gives some  vacation     to employees, the most would choose to travel but not watching TV at home. By reaching some expected places, we can feel the true life local people lived their but not only some scenes accepted in visual way. We may touch the    tree living for thousands years planted in Qin dynasty. We may taste the traditional soup cooked by  descendents of Osten. Either we may choose some special articles and bring to our family or friends as presents. Another crucial faction of tourism is that it might serve as the main economical enterprise of nation. Some countries must spare no effort to attract visitors as more as possible to keep the economic survival. Also the relevant business    can be expedited by the visitors’ consumption. Just for this reason, some remote villages take tourism as their crucial way to improve local economy.
     On the other hand, the development of modern technology  in turn serves as a catalyst for the boom of tourism. Due to the attractive introduction people accept in TV, no reason will restrain them from traveling there if time promises. For this reason, advertisement can be chose as an important way to give people the summaries of some sorts and help the information be aware of by more people in different places of the world. Pressed by the strong feeling of tasting the traditional food or getting some special articles, more people will travel to the place which is unknown before.
  In sum, tourism has its own attribute that modern technology can't achieve, so replacement won't come true and the boom of tourism is destined according to the continuously developing modern technology.

dychangfengUID: 2216148

TOPIC: ISSUE150 - "Because of television and worldwide computer connections, people can now become familiar with a great many places that they have never visited. As a result, tourism will soon become obsolete."


1. modern technology provide a colorful and board world
2. tourism keep people attack with the true world
    relaxation
    local culture
    economical faction
3. attractive introduction intrigue people to the great sort and will boom tourism

  When some idea or implement can't keep its pace with the developing circumscribe, it is obsolete. Whether tourism gradually loses its impact in people's life in the modern society and will soon been took place（take place 是发生的意思吧，好象不能用于被动，这里是？） is a concerning issue. In my opinion, tourism still has its special faction （function)and it will boom with the improvement of society.
  Admittedly, the modern technologies, such as television and worldwide computer connections, provide people a colorful and broad world according to vivid images. The Albs at distance show their     spectacularity in front of you. The Danube covering thousands of miles flows under your eyes. The TV set brings the whole world to your house, and you can touch any place without undergoing the boring time spent in train and flight. The scenes cover from our ancestors' life to the fashion of modern society, from    pyramid in ancient Egypt to  Alaska       in West, and some extremely special places such as Arctic where general people wouldn't imagine to arrive as well. What's more, the modern technology not only creates a window as a mirror of the colorful world(这句话欠斟酌，mirror 删去）, it also ornament the prospect by adding relevant information to make the scene more attractive and abundant. For instance, the program 'Discovery' reveals some mystery    tombs and introduces the contexts of them about the host and some archeologists who have secretly dead after they uncover    the tombs   in human history. These attractive story and abundant introduction intrigue our curiosity and save our time in searching for the relevant information about it in books. Also, the introducing process is carried out only in home at our spare time of daily          life.
    Nonetheless, tourism still has its place in people's life for it not only covers beautiful previsions but serve as leisure of life. Every people in modern society lives a tension life at the hands of new technologies（总觉得live a tension life 有些不地道，用live under tension 会不会好些）. Supposing that after a whole day spent in front of computer, would any people wants to get some superficial images by continuously watching the screen? To some extent, the pressure ascribe to modern technology plays a byproduct that is the    boredom of people（语法问题，两个谓语）. Then if the corporation gives some  vacation     to employees, the most would choose to travel but not watching TV at home. By reaching some expected places, we can feel the true life local people lived their but not only some scenes accepted in visual way. We may touch the    tree living for thousands years planted in Qin dynasty. We may taste the traditional soup cooked by  descendents of Osten. Either we may choose some special articles and bring to our family or friends as presents. Another crucial faction of tourism is that it might serve as the main economical enterprise of nation. Some countries must spare no effort to attract visitors as more as possible to keep the economic survival. Also the relevant business    can be expedited by the visitors’ consumption. Just for this reason, some remote villages take tourism as their crucial way to improve local economy.（最后这点有些跑题，这是我们应该怎样做，文中是再讨论旅游本身的发展趋势）     On the other hand, the development of modern technology  in turn serves as a catalyst for the boom of tourism. Due to the attractive introduction people accept in TV, no reason will restrain them from traveling there if time promises（不够严谨，还有其他因素，金钱等）. For this reason, advertisement can be chose as an important way to give people the summaries of some sorts and help the information be aware of by more people in different places of the world. Pressed by the strong feeling of tasting the traditional food or getting some special articles, more people will travel to the place which is unknown before.
  In sum, tourism has its own attribute that modern technology can't achieve, so replacement won't come true and the boom of tourism is destined according to the continuously developing modern technology.
总体上说，文章论述还是很全的，例子也很多，不足是给人的感觉是例子的堆积，缺少相应的评论，这是我们都要努力的地方。
一些词汇和语法错误，还有用的不大地道的地方，对我们来说是一大难点。
我觉得多分析一些比多列举效果好些，所以建议作者不用花太大心思在例子上，要点是说情自己的道理。
个人意见，欢迎讨论！:)一起努力哦！

smiles11UID: 2232631

TOPIC: ISSUE150 - "Because of television and worldwide computer connections, people can now become familiar with a great many places that they have never visited. As a result, tourism will soon become obsolete."


1. modern technology provide a colorful and board world
2. tourism keep people attack with the true world
    relaxation
    local culture
    economical faction
3. attractive introduction intrigue people to the great sort and will boom tourism

  When some idea or implement can't keep its pace with the developing circumscribe, it is obsolete. Whether tourism gradually loses its impact in people's life in the modern society and will soon been took place is a concerning issue. In my opinion, tourism still has its special faction and it will boom with the improvement of society.
  Admittedly, the modern technologies, such as television and worldwide computer connections, provide people a colorful and broad world according to vivid images. The Albs at distance show their     spectacularity in front of you. The Danube covering thousands of miles flows under your eyes----这两个句子都不懂啊，主要那两个单词不知道，汗！. The TV set brings the whole world to your house, and you can touch any place without undergoing the boring time spent in train and flight. The scenes cover from our ancestors' life to the fashion of modern society, from    pyramid in ancient Egypt to  Alaska--这个中间是否缺点什么？       in West, and some extremely special places such as Arctic where general people wouldn't imagine to arrive as well. What's more, the modern technology not only creates a window as a mirror of the colorful world, it also ornament the prospect by adding relevant information to make the scene more attractive and abundant. For instance, the program 'Discovery' reveals some mystery    tombs and introduces the contexts of them about the host and some archeologists who have secretly dead after they uncover    the tombs   in human history. These attractive story and abundant introduction intrigue our curiosity and save our time in searching for the relevant information about it in books. Also, the introducing process is carried out only in home at our spare time of daily          life.--为啥只写电视没有写网络呢？

    Nonetheless, tourism still has its place in people's life for it not only covers beautiful previsions but serve as leisure of life. Every people in modern society lives a tension life at the hands of ---确信是这个短语吗？new technologies. Supposing that after a whole day spent in front of computer, would any people wants to get some superficial images by continuously watching the screen? To some extent, the pressure ascribe to modern technology plays a byproduct that is the    boredom of people. Then if the corporation gives some  vacation     to employees, the most would choose to travel but not watching TV at home. By reaching some expected places, we can feel the true life local people lived their but not only some scenes accepted in visual way. We may touch the    tree living for thousands----单数 years planted in Qin dynasty---哇，真有那么老的树吗，几千年的？. We may taste the traditional soup cooked by  descendents of Osten. Either we may choose some special articles and bring to our family or friends as presents. Another crucial faction of tourism is that it might serve as the main economical enterprise of nation. Some countries must spare no effort to attract visitors as more as possible to keep the economic survival. Also the relevant business    can be expedited by the visitors’ consumption. Just for this reason, some remote villages take tourism as their crucial way to improve local economy.


     On the other hand, the development of modern technology  in turn serves as a catalyst for the boom of tourism. Due to the attractive introduction people accept in TV, no reason will restrain them from traveling there if time promises. For this reason, advertisement can be chose as an important way to give people the summaries of some sorts and help the information be aware of by more people---改！ in different places of the world. Pressed by the strong feeling of tasting the traditional food or getting some special articles, more people will travel to the place which is unknown before.----相对前两段，这段有点少！

  In sum, tourism has its own attribute that modern technology can't achieve, so replacement won't come true and the boom of tourism is destined according to the continuously developing modern technology.

注意点：
1，正式文体中，从句引导词一般不要省略包括宾语从句的that，那么数一数你省掉了多少，有些句子没有引导词，还真的看得很费劲。

2，排版怎么会是这样的，发上来之前稍微整理一下，还真看得眼花:mad::mad::mad::mad:不是自己小组的好兄弟，真想kick:@:@:@:@:@:@:@你！

3严格点了，不要难过！pat pat pat pat!

vitaminxixiUID: 2159890

哈哈
下次一定注意
谢谢两个兄弟帮我改得这么仔细！！
:lol:handshake