8T同主题作文第4期--topic 170(请多指教)

netmasterUID: 2237332

Human beings are a kind of social animals. We humans cannot leave any group or organization if we want to survive our life, because of the sociability. Groups or organizations, to some extent, are very important to us people, since when in a group or organization, people can obtain information, team spirit and chances to make more friends.

First of all, groups or organizations can offer us more information. Few people can know about the truth about some important events without the communication with others. Therefore, groups or organizations are the place where we are able to keep in touch with others, have a look at outside world, and upgrade our knowledge library. For instance, when we grow into teenagers, we have to go to a university, an organization that can inform us of the most useful knowledge in the world. Also, if we graduate from school, we will enter a company to make money where we can attain more valuable experience from our job. Only by continuously absorbing new knowledge and experience can we keep up with the fast pace of development in the world. Otherwise, we would lose many opportunities to have a bright future and a beautiful life.

Furthermore, in groups and organizations, we are able to develop a significant quality that is badly needed by a person. It is the team spirit. We all know that a single man’s power is not comparable to a group’s power. In another word, no matter how excellent you are, if you have not team spirit, you are nothing. Our society needs those who have team spirit to conduct enterprises, to organize activities and to execute plans. The team spirit is the prerequisite for a person to succeed, because a good group or organization is based on people’s collaboration and communication.

Thirdly, groups and organizations can create chances for us to make friends. We all need friends, because we need someone to talk, to communicate, and to share our feelings. In groups, people are from different fields. Thus we, by making friends with them, can learn quite a few knowledge of other fields and broaden our sight. In addition, if we have some trouble, we ask others in groups for help and do not need to be worried about hard problems.

Taking into account of all these factors, we may safely reach the conclusion that groups and organizations are very important to all of us.

cellophane05UID: 2135343

我改改，个人意见，请多谅解

Human beings are a kind of social animals. We humans cannot leave any group or organization if we want to survive （感觉全文survive用法，不是很好，vr.幸存， vt.时是长寿、度过什么而存在）our life, because of the sociability. Groups or organizations, to some extent, are very important to us people, since when （去掉） in a group or organization, people can obtain information, team spirit and chances to make more friends.

First of all, groups or organizations can offer us more information. Few people can know about the truth about some important events without the communication with others. Therefore, groups or organizations are the place where we are able to keep in touch with others, have a look at outside world, and upgrade our knowledge library. For instance, when we grow into teenagers, we have to go to a university, an organization that can inform us of the most useful knowledge in the world. Also, if （用when吧） we graduate from school, we will enter a company to make money where we can attain more valuable experience from our job. Only by continuously absorbing new knowledge and experience can we keep up with the fast pace of development in the world. Otherwise, we would lose many opportunities to have a bright future and a beautiful life.

Furthermore, in groups and organizations, we are able to develop a significant quality that is badly needed by a person. It is the team spirit. We all know that a single man’s power is not comparable to a group’s power. In another word, no matter how excellent you are, if you have not （应为no）team spirit, you are nothing. Our society needs those who have team spirit to conduct enterprises, to organize activities and to execute plans. The team spirit is the prerequisite for a person to succeed, because a good group or organization is based on people’s collaboration and communication.

Thirdly, groups and organizations can create chances for us to make friends. We all need friends, because we need someone to talk, to communicate, and to share our feelings. In groups, people are from different fields. Thus we, by making friends with them, can learn quite a few （不可数） knowledge of other fields and broaden our sight. In addition, if we have some trouble, we ask others in groups for help and do not need to be worried about hard problems.

Taking into account of all these factors, we may safely reach the conclusion that groups and organizations are very important to all of us.


在有些地方，读起来有点吃力了，在那里，感觉你太注重句式了，但又没有很好的掌握它们的用法。
连接词用的不错，如furthermore, in addition, otherwise

欢迎回拍
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cici816UID: 2219412

已经修改了，请看附件，欢迎互改。我的作文T170