Issue11全文 197提纲【大杀四方 yibin.he 第四次作业】欢迎拍转！

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全文：
TOPIC: ISSUE11 - "All nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems."
WORDS: 426          TIME: 上午 12:45:00          DATE: 2007-1-24

The opinion given above maybe a good point in the view of the whole benefit of the people around the world, but there may be some problems with its pracitiality, it is also possible to  rise some questions that we can't predict.

Today, as the expotential scientific and technical development, the standard of people's life improved greatly, although there is great progress in economy, there are still many social problems troubling people around the world. Poverty, health problems, criminals...,all these are not short-term but persistent ever since human exist in the world. As a human being, we need to consider these problems seriously, the reccommendation mentioned the above is benial from heart, yet it may be unreasonable in the real world.

Regarding the practiciality, we have to consider many factors such as the capital to initiate the programme, the place we choose to institute the university, the proper professor to teach the necessary knowledge relative to the global issues, and the qualified students around the world to engage in the process.As there are many nations to support the programme, it is entirely possible that each nation has it's own opinion that is different with one another regarding the same issue. For example, when we draw down the issue of the place in which the university should be established, maybe each nation wish to have it founded in it's own propriety, thus it will stir a huge confict with each other.Selection the qualified professors also appear a big problem, in that currently there are so many global problems which does not exist alone but totally connected with lots of other problems and situations. Just think about poverty and criminals, poverty can cause criminal, and criminal can cause the tumult of one country, leading the downward trend of the economy. Surely we can invite some experts in one field, however, explanation in one perspective does not make sense in solving most of the social problems, especially the ones persistantly exist in the world.

Furthermore, even if we can set up such a university, we can't optimally think that such an action can solve, at least relieve the world's most persistent social problems.As we can see, the problems are the world's problems, and it just means that the similar problems appear almost every where around the world, while it is necessary to take account of the local regulation and customs as well as the thinking mode of the local people. In different place, there can be different situations. So many areas in one nation and so many nations inthe world, it would be a huge work for the limited students and professorsto accomplish, let alone to considering that situations may alter in the fast-changing world so that problem appear totally different when we have draw out a way to solve the original one.Moreover, students from everywhere around the world hold diversified values, can a effective conclusion be converged in an effective period of time?

Considering all the above, the suggestion is good in terms of benefiting all in the world, yet developing such a global university is too hard to take into action in real world. Maybe it is better to separate the world's social problems to each nation regarding their own regulation and customs, only in this way can the action taken to solve the problems be effective.As a human in the world, what we should do is to bear the corresponding responsibility and make the whole world an ideal garden.


提纲：
TOPIC: ISSUE197 - "The material progress and well-being of one country are necessarily connected to the material progress and well-being of all other countries."

Position: With globalization currently, nations in the world are inevitably connected to each other.

A: As the world is becoming smaller, it is common for one nation to trade with other countries, and the example of Asian financial crisis in 1998 is a good example of close relationship among countries.
B: With the development of technology, it makes possible that scientists and educationists can communicate with their counterparts all around the world, thus contribute to the social progress.
C: International terrorism tie the efforts of nations in the world together.

0o0o_zsmUID: 2213544

The opinion given above maybe a good point in the view of the whole benefit of the people around the world, but there may be some problems with its pracitiality, it is also possible to  rise some questions that we can't predict.

（既然你的观点中提到了这一做法可能是好的能造全人类，那这段有必要论述怎么个好法怎么个造福法，可是我觉得你论述的不够）Today, as the expotential scientific and technical development, the standard of people's life improved greatly, although there is great progress in economy, there are still many social problems troubling people around the world. Poverty, health problems, criminals...,all these are not short-term but persistent ever since human exist in the world. As a human being, we need to consider these problems seriously, the reccommendation mentioned the above is benial from heart, yet it may be unreasonable in the real world.

上面两段我看得很模糊，每段的最后都提出了“这种做法的实用性很可疑”。在我看来第二段你是想论述有许多问题很pressing急需解决，that's ok, 可是突然最后来一句。。。虽然可能你的目的是想承上启下，可是我觉得这样有点偏离了你二段先论述的观点（呵呵可能是我作文写得比较死板，不太敢创新）


（TS不够鲜明）Regarding the practiciality, we have to consider many factors such as the capital to initiate the programme, the place we choose to institute the university, the proper professor to teach the necessary knowledge relative to the global issues, and the qualified students around the world to engage in the process.As there are many nations to support the programme, it is entirely possible that each nation has it's（its） own opinion that is different with one another regarding the same issue. For example, when we draw down the issue of the place in which the university should be established, maybe each nation wish to have it founded in it's own propriety, thus it will stir a huge confict with each other.（这里加个连接词吧比如Besides之类的，否则后面那个also显得很孤立）Selection（selecting吧，要不就是The selection of） the qualified professors also appear(appears to be，to be 可以省？呵呵说老实话我也不清楚) a big problem, in that currently there are so many global problems which does not exist alone but totally connected with lots of other problems and situations. Just think about poverty and criminals, poverty can cause criminal, and criminal can cause the tumult of one country, leading the downward trend of the economy. Surely we can invite some experts in one field, however, explanation in one perspective does not make sense in solving most of the social problems, especially the ones persistantly exist in the world.

Furthermore, even if we can set up such a university, we can't optimally think that such an action can solve, at least relieve the world's most persistent social problems.As we can see, the problems are the world's problems, and it just means that the similar problems appear almost every where around the world, while it is necessary to take account of the local regulation and customs as well as the thinking mode of the local people. In different place, there can be different situations. （加个In light of或者With你看会不会好些）So many areas in one nation and so many nations inthe world, it would be a huge work for the limited students and professorsto accomplish, let alone to considering that situations may alter in the fast-changing world so that problem appear totally different when we have draw out a way to solve the original one.Moreover, students from everywhere around the world hold diversified values, can a effective conclusion be converged in an effective period of time?（多加点连接词吧，感觉句子与句子之间连贯性不强，唉，这也是我一直烦恼的问题）

Considering all the above, the suggestion is good in terms of benefiting all in the world, yet developing such a global university is too hard to take into action in real world. Maybe it is better to separate the world's social problems to each nation regarding their own regulation and customs, only in this way can the action taken to solve the problems be effective.As a human in the world, what we should do is to bear the corresponding responsibility and make the whole world an ideal garden.

你是限时写的吧，好强，向你学习（我比你们都早更应开始限时了）
总体感觉句子与句子之间连接不够顺畅，我想如果能加上些连词会好很多吧；
另外就是第二段论述与开头的观点对应的不是很好。对了关于第二段我突然想到就是首先TS不明显，整段感觉是文章的背景介绍可能作开头比较合适

呵呵，献丑了