issue7 第二篇习作，请求拍砖，谢谢

edison_ldUID: 2253039

issue7  "The video camera provides such an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life that it has become a more important form of documentation than written records."
有保留的反对
提纲：
1。video camera有它特有的好处，是written record 不能比的。分了两段（这样会不会有点过？）
2。但是written 起到的作用是不容忽视的，有些方面V.C.是代替不了的
3。书本作为载体的优势

The speaker asserts that the video camera has become a more important form of documentation than traditional written records, for the reason that it can provide an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life. I concede that a video camera does have such attractive functions which written records cannot own, but I cannot agree with the speaker's assertion because the speaker overstates the comparative significance of video as a documentary tool.
                           
Admittedly, on one hand, with the development of electronic technology, video camera has become a common thing in our quotidian lives, and it plays an important role in providing an objective and accurate record of an event’s spatial aspects. Many places such as banks, big restaurants, hospitals, crossroad and some other public areas are equipped with video cameras for surveillance. So, they can play a vital evidentiary role in legal proceedings—such as those involving robbery, stealing, motor vehicle violations, and even malpractice in a hospital operation room. Also, we use it to record the meaningful moments in our daily lives and this really provides a wonderful experience. For example, a record of wedding reception, an important recital, or a surprise birthday party, all of which can bring a happiness memory when they are “replayed”.

On the other hand, video supplies us with a new perspective to help learn the world around us. Great news reported with lively videos allows us to know what has happened around the world more impressive than through news papers. The imagine of the 911 catastrophe undoubtedly is a giant shock to the worldwide people, and leave people deeply thinking(请问leave的这个用法我有没有用对？leave＋sb.＋？) about the terrorism. Moreover, some bald and obscure knowledge from books is transformed into vivid video which can be more easily to comprehend by student, while on matter how keen an observer and skilled writer cannot reach that point.

Notwithstanding the foregoing strengths that owned by the video camera, we cannot conclude that video has become a more important form of documentation than written records. Because for certain other purposes and forms of facts written records are more effective and appropriate than video records. Just as mentioned above that video is perfect in documenting events’ spatial aspects, but if these events are not shot in time, then video cameras are of no use to “recur” them. But such missed events can be written down. Moreover, video is of little use when it comes to documenting a person’s subjective state of mind, impressions, feelings, or reflections of an event or experience, and also statistical or other quantitative information. At the same time, people can add their views to the written records that may help readers understand more easily, or give reader’s a reference point about the event.

Secondly, books, as the carrier of written records, also carry many strong points that video records do not contain. Such as they are more easier to reach--you can get mostly any books you want from book stores, libraries, or from other people; less restriction by surrounding--what you need only are enough light and the book, not like the video records that need not only the facilities, such as TV, or DVD player, but also electricity--without which all video records are rubbish; less harm to your health---compare to the video recording, books will never bring you electromagnetic radiation, which is health killer. All these merits of books make written record beloved by the majority and so it would never disappear as well as books.

In the final analysis, both the two forms of record are important in nowadays’ live, and the speaker unfortunately overrates the importance of video records. As discussed above, both forms have their dominance of different areas. Only by utilize them properly can they bring us more benefits.

自己改了两遍，最大的问题是又北美的影响太大。另外没有限时。
大家给批批吧，多谢了

suimegoUID: 2231602

The speaker asserts that the video camera has become a more important form of documentation than traditional written records, for the reason that it can provide an accurate and convincing record of contemporary life. I concede that a video camera does have such attractive functions which written records cannot own ---own a function?动词好象用的不太对, but I cannot agree with the speaker's assertion because the speaker overstates the comparative significance of video as a documentary tool.部分保留的同意，呵呵，这种思路挺好的，比较全面
                           
Admittedly, on one hand, with the development of electronic technology, video camera has become a common thing in our quotidian lives, and it plays an important role in providing an objective and accurate record of an event’s spatial aspects. Many places such as banks, big restaurants, hospitals, crossroad and some other public areas are equipped with video cameras for surveillance. 这个例子举的之前再衔接一下就好了，前面是说客观准确，后面是监视，还是有点区别的，否则感觉比较突兀。So, they can play a vital evidentiary role in legal proceedings—such as those involving robbery, stealing, motor vehicle violations, and even malpractice in a hospital operation room. 不错不错，和前面bank之类对应了Also, we use it to record the meaningful moments in our daily lives and this really provides a wonderful experience. For example, a record of wedding reception, an important recital, or a surprise birthday party, all of which can bring a happiness memory when they are “replayed”.

On the other hand, video supplies us with a new perspective to help learn the world around us. Great news reported with lively videos allows us to know what has happened around the world more impressive than through news papers. The imagine of the 911 catastrophe undoubtedly is a giant shock to the worldwide people, and leave people deeply thinking(请问leave的这个用法我有没有用对？leave＋sb.＋？) about the terrorism.--有些中文化的感觉，中文常说：给某人留下了思考，最好不要这样用 Moreover, some bald and obscure knowledge from books is transformed into vivid video which can be more easily to comprehend by student, while on matter how keen an observer and skilled writer cannot reach that point.

Notwithstanding the foregoing strengths that owned by the video camera, we cannot conclude that video has become a more important form of documentation than written records. Because for certain other purposes and forms of facts written records are more effective and appropriate than video records. Just as mentioned above that video is perfect in documenting events’ spatial aspects, but if these events are not shot in time, then video cameras are of no use to “recur” them. But such missed events can be written down. Moreover, video is of little use when it comes to documenting a person’s subjective state of mind, impressions, feelings, or reflections of an event or experience, and also statistical or other quantitative information. At the same time, people can add their views to the written records that may help readers understand more easily, or give reader’s a reference point about the event.我觉得这段开头可以先简单说理由（就是第二句because后面的那部分），再提观点，或者用一个转折词连一下。

Secondly,这里用secondly不太好 books, as the carrier of written records, also carry many strong points that video records do not contain. Such as they are more easier to reach--you can get mostly any books you want from book stores, libraries, or from other people; less restriction by surrounding--what you need only are enough light and the book, not like the video records that need not only the facilities, such as TV, or DVD player, but also electricity--without which all video records are rubbish; less harm to your health---compare to the video recording, books will never bring you electromagnetic radiation, which is health killer. All these merits of books make written record beloved by the majority and so it would never disappear as well as books.是想说优点和书一起不会消失？  
这段的例子写的很清楚，向你学习~~:)

In the final analysis, both the two forms of record are important in nowadays’ live, and the speaker unfortunately overrates the importance of video records. As discussed above, both forms have their dominance of different areas. Only by utilize them properly can they bring us more benefits.
结尾我觉得没什么问题

[ 本帖最后由 suimego 于 2007-3-18 09:17 编辑 ]

edison_ldUID: 2253039

嘿嘿，就关于书的那段基本上是自己写的，能得到肯定真是欣慰。最后一句我是想说written record和书都不会消失，也许改为so does books.会好一点，也许不说这句更好，呵呵。
总之谢谢了，继续努力:)