Issue99 同主题写作，欢迎拍砖

asong2004UID：2178054

TOPIC: ISSUE99 - "In any realm of life-whether academic, social, business, or political-the only way to succeed is to take a practical, rather than an idealistic, point of view. Pragmatic behavior guarantees survival, whereas idealistic views tend to be superceded by simpler, more immediate options."


The speaker claims that the only way to succeed is to take a practical rather than an idealistic in any realm of life. I concede that pragmatic behavior provide substantial base for success. However, without idealistic, human being will lost true direction and sufficient power to success. The best way to succeed is to combine with pragmatic and idealistic.

First and foremost, it is indispensable for human being to take pragmatic behavior for fulfilling their objects. It is well known that attaining  a real success may be  always a long-term progress. Without solving immediate problems, any individual or community may fail to survival, let alone to achieve great success. Thus pragmatic behavior guarantee survival and gain a substantial fundamental for long-term success. Take students for example. Those students are  willing to become famous individuals, such as scientists, artists, effective leader and so on. To achieve such objects, they have to learn much knowledge for making a well ready for their future instead of imaging certain null and unrealistic things. Otherwise, they may grow up to be ineffective citizens rather than outstanding individuals. After all, those famous people had study enough knowledge which contribute to their personal success during their childhood. Therefore, just taking an idealistic behavior rather than doing pragmatic one make a harm to our long-term success.

However, we should not neglect the importance of idealistic which provide the true orient and lasting power. But for the effect of idealistic, we may lose power to insist our objects and avoid some short -sight interest retarding our real and long-term success. Consider the former Suviet Union which is an remarkable example for his short-sight behavior. During the period of lengzhan, the Soviet Union just focus on addressing more immediate problem of competition with the United States regardless of long-term and full development of society. To excel the USA in weapons, the Soviet Union completely abandon development of other aspects such as economic, which is more crucial to members of society. As a result, the nation was trapped a long economical depression impeding long-term advance. Accordingly, to gain a long-term success, we must to insist our idealistic.

Finally, the only way to succeed is calling for a balance between practical and idealistic, point of view. They both have significant influence on our success. For example, when we want to build a skyscraper, we need architect who design all structures of building and workers who do the real building. Without scientific designed structure of construction, the workers fails to build the skyscraper. Without the endeavor of such workers, the designed things may be mere dream rather than a true building. Apparently, as long as the architect and workers work corporately, a true great skyscraper would be finished.

To sum up. It is necessary for human being to combine with practical and idealistic viewpoints. When pragmatic behavior offer a substantial fundament and idealistic behavior design a true way, human being may gain real success.

iq28UID：2152875

The speaker claims that the only way to succeed (语法) is to take a practical (语法.名词是试验课的意思) rather than an idealistic (词性) in any realm of life. I concede that pragmatic behavior provide (单复数) substantial base for success. However, without idealistic, human being will lost (语法) true direction and sufficient power (既然提出了这两点,那么下面就要按照这个来说) to success. The best way to succeed (语法) is to combine with pragmatic and idealistic. (语法)
(先承认你第一段观念表述的很清楚.但是不得不说,这么多没有修改的语法错误,在我看来是你对于aw的态度的一种体现.)

First and foremost, it is indispensable for human being to take pragmatic behavior for fulfilling their objects. (ts虽然清楚但是没有表达出具体会讨论什么方面) It is well known that attaining a real success may be always (换次序) a long-term progress. (这一句没看出跟本段ts有何关联.甚至让人觉得是在支持理想主义的观念) Without solving immediate problems, any individual or community may fail to survival, (语法) let alone to achieve great success. (这句很bingo) Thus pragmatic behavior guarantee survival and gain a substantial fundamental for long-term success. (前半句复述前面一句,后半句转述其实实际是长远成功的基础.bingo.到了这里看出第一句说长期和本段ts的观念.不过那句话还是放在without那句的后面会比较好) Take students for example. Those students are willing to become famous individuals, such as scientists, artists, effective leader(s) and so on. To achieve such objects, they have to learn much knowledge for making a well ready for their future instead of imaging certain null and unrealistic things. (这个不是理想主义,这个是空想主义...) Otherwise, they may grow up to be ineffective citizens rather than outstanding individuals. After all, those famous people had study (语法) enough knowledge which contribute (语法) to their personal success during their childhood. (局限在前面论证的层次没有深入下去) Therefore, just taking an idealistic behavior (段内基本没有提到理想主义的论证) rather than doing pragmatic one make (语法) a harm to our long-term success. (论证其实有点样子了,虽然深度还不够.虽然没有成功讲到理想主义的缺点)

However, we should not neglect the importance of idealistic which provide the true orient and lasting power. But for the effect of idealistic, we may lose power to insist our objects and avoid some short -sight interest retarding our real and long-term success. (基本重述ts.无用) Consider the former Suviet Union which is an remarkable example for his short-sight behavior. (近视不等于实用.偷换概念) During the period of lengzhan, (..... Cold/Silent War) the Soviet Union just focus on addressing more immediate problem of competition with the United States regardless of long-term and full development of society. To excel the USA in weapons, the Soviet Union completely abandon development of other aspects such as economic, which is more crucial to members of society. (更适合论证发展不能偏颇,并未涉及理想主义跟实用主义.跑掉了) As a result, the nation was trapped a long economical depression impeding long-term advance. (例子结束就开始收尾了.这么不好.至少加两句论证的东西) Accordingly, to gain a long-term success, we must to insist our idealistic. (本段论证苍白,更重要的是有跑题嫌疑)

Finally, the only way to succeed is calling for a balance between practical and idealistic, point of view. They both have significant influence on our success. For example, when we want to build a skyscraper, we need architect who design all structures of building and workers who do the real building. Without scientific designed structure of construction, (设计跟理想主义根本不搭杠) the workers fails to build the skyscraper. Without the endeavor of such workers, (这个还像一点使用主义.不过也不算很典型) the designed things may be mere dream rather than a true building. Apparently, as long as the architect and workers work corporately, a true great skyscraper would be finished. (这一段完全像是跑掉了.盖摩天大楼的步骤论述,基本没有靠到使用和理想主义的范畴上面去.跑题)

To sum up. It is necessary for human being to combine with practical and idealistic viewpoints. When pragmatic behavior offer a substantial fundament and idealistic behavior design a true way, human being may gain real success.

实用主义和理想主义
本身就是一个很大很空的问题
举例居然用了造楼这种相对比较实际的小事例
而且还没有跟理想主义现实主义靠上去.这个是非常危险的
加油