argument38 同题写作 by annlysea

annlyseaUID: 2219320

TOPIC: ARGUMENT38 - The following memo appeared in the newsletter of the West Meria Public Health Council.

"An innovative treatment has come to our attention that promises to significantly reduce absenteeism in our schools and workplaces. A study reports that in nearby East Meria, where fish consumption is very high, people visit the doctor only once or twice per year for the treatment of colds. Clearly, eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent colds. Since colds are the reason most frequently given for absences from school and work, we recommend the daily use of Ichthaid, a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil, as a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeism."

WORDS: 483         TIME: 0:30:00         DATE: 2007-3-30


In this argument, by providing some analyses, certain facts and a study, the arguer asserts that using of lchthaid is a good way to pervent colds and lower absenteeism in EM. At first glance, the conclusion the arguer takes sounds correct, but the closer examination will disclose the logical flaws that conceal in this argument.

First of all, lacking the warrants, the result of the study is open to doubt. The arguer rules out the other possibilities that lead to the low times for the treatment of colds of people in nearby East Meria(EA). The common sense tells that if the people tends to catch a cold that contribute to their physician, mood and living evironmment. Maybe the people in nearby EA are likely to do exercises, keep the happy mood and pay attention to their living and working environment per day, so that they have a adequately healthy body to prevent the colds. If so, the times for catching colds is lower. Hence, it is not necessary to visit doctor for many times per year for treating colds. Therefore, the relationship between eating a substantial amount of fish and the low times for the treatment of colds in nearby EM is not credible.

Secondly, even if the eating substantial amount of fish indeed prevent colds, however, if using lchthaid daily, a nuritional supplement derived from fish oil, can prevent colds is skepstical. The arguer fails to show enough evidence to present that the function of treating colds between using lchthaid and eating fish is identical. Perhaps eating fish can prevent colds due to the other nutritional supplement but not lchthaid. Or perhaps cold is prevented due to the coaction of Lchthaid and the other nutrition from fish. If so, using Lchthaid cannot prevent cold effectively. Hence, the conclusion is still doubtful.

Morever, even if using Lchthaid can prevent colds, but if the absenteeism will decrease that is questionable in EM. The arguer fails to certify that absenteeism merely results in catching cold in MA. Perhaps most of people in EA like relaxed life, so they often take catching cold as a excuse to take a rest. Granted that catching cold is only reason of absenteeism, but if using Lchthaid in EA will bring the same effect as consuming eat in nearby EA that unconvincing. Perhaps using Lchthaid is not useful for the people of EA. If so, it waste money to using Lchthaid for the people who are absent only due to colds. Thereby, the recommendation isnot authentic.


To sum up, lacking credible evidence, the aruger can not give the recommendation rashly. To support the conclusion, the arguer should provide more information to prove that there is necessary relationship between the low times for the treatment of colds and high eating fish in nearby EM. To more evalute the conclusion, the arguer should support more details about lchthaid and people in EM.

[ 本帖最后由 annlysea 于 2007-3-30 11:29 编辑 ]

荧惑UID: 2280559

不是啊，我感觉好很多了，一会等QQ来看看吧~;d:

annlyseaUID: 2219320

被小Q改完了
我有阴影啊~~HUHU

zhizi522UID: 2307341

iq狠点批也是为咱好嘛，呵呵，干嘛有阴影呢？
在考前看到自己的问题越多，能进步的余地就更大，多多开心才是嘛，呵呵
我也刚奋斗完了篇恶心的，狂汗中。。
一起加油！

annlyseaUID: 2219320

HUHU~~
玩笑啦
上次被他改的很狠~~要是有阴影我就不会在贴东西出来了
哈哈~

chongxinlaiUID: 2235209

In this argument, by providing some analyses, certain facts and a study, the arguer asserts that using of lchthaid is a good way to pervent colds and lower absenteeism in EM. At first glance, the conclusion the arguer takes sounds correct, but the closer examination will disclose the logical flaws that conceal in this argument.

First of all, lacking the warrants, the result of the study is open to doubt. The arguer rules out the other possibilities that lead to the low times for the treatment of colds of people in nearby East Meria(EA). The common sense tells that if the people tends to catch a cold that contribute to their physician, mood and living evironmment. Maybe the people in nearby EA are likely to do exercises, keep the happy mood and pay attention to their living and working environment per day, so that they have a adequately healthy body to prevent the colds. If so, the times for catching colds is lower. Hence, it is not necessary to visit doctor for many times per year for treating colds. Therefore, the relationship between eating a substantial amount of fish and the low times for the treatment of colds in nearby EM is not credible.

Secondly, even if the eating substantial amount of fish indeed prevent colds, however, if using lchthaid daily, a nuritional supplement derived from fish oil, can prevent colds is skepstical. The arguer fails to show enough evidence to present that the function of treating colds between using lchthaid and eating fish is identical. Perhaps eating fish can prevent colds due to the other nutritional supplement but not lchthaid.应该具体说说，看来是限时时间不够亚 Or perhaps cold is prevented due to the coaction of Lchthaid and the other nutrition from fish. 同上If so, using Lchthaid cannot prevent cold effectively. Hence, the conclusion is still doubtful.

Morever, even if using Lchthaid can prevent colds, but if the absenteeism will decrease that is questionable in EM. The arguer fails to certify that absenteeism merely results in catching cold in MA. Perhaps most of people in EA like relaxed life, so they often take catching cold as a excuse to take a rest.晕了，看着有EM EA MA…. 加个明显的连接次吧Granted that catching cold is only reason of absenteeism, but if using Lchthaid in EA will bring the same effect as consuming eat in nearby EA that unconvincing. Perhaps using Lchthaid is not useful for the people of EA也是没时间展开了，可惜亚. If so, it waste money to using Lchthaid for the people who are absent only due to colds. Thereby, the recommendation isnot authentic.



To sum up, lacking credible evidence, the aruger can not give the recommendation rashly. To support the conclusion, the arguer should provide more information to prove that there is necessary relationship between the low times for the treatment of colds and high eating fish in nearby EM. To more evalute the conclusion, the arguer should support more details about lchthaid and people in EM.
看了主要是时间的问题了，继续限时吧，会更好的

zhizi522UID: 2307341

原帖由 annlysea 于 2007-3-30 13:13 发表
HUHU~~
玩笑啦
上次被他改的很狠~~要是有阴影我就不会在贴东西出来了
哈哈~

恩，嘿嘿
+oil+oil+oil together!

荧惑UID: 2280559

原帖由 annlysea 于 2007-3-30 13:13 发表
HUHU~~
玩笑啦
上次被他改的很狠~~要是有阴影我就不会在贴东西出来了
哈哈~

HUHUHUHU， Deer~~~~

iq28UID: 2152875

In this argument, by providing some analyses, certain facts and a study, the arguer asserts that using of lchthaid is a good way to pervent colds and lower absenteeism in EM. At first glance, the conclusion the arguer takes sounds correct, (用处不大,删) but the closer examination will disclose the logical flaws that conceal in this argument.

First of all, lacking the warrants, the result of the study is open to doubt. (个人不推荐这种ts类型) The arguer rules out (这里不是用这个词组的,一般都是fails to take other possibilities into account, rule out 一般用在段尾) the other possibilities that lead to the low times for the treatment of colds of people in nearby (不攻击地域的时候就不要写这个词) East Meria(EA). The common sense tells that if the people tends to catch a cold that contribute to their physician, mood and living evironmment. (句法有问题) Maybe the people in nearby EA are likely to do exercises, keep the happy mood and pay attention to their living and working environment per day, so that they have a adequately healthy body to prevent the colds. If so, the times for catching colds is lower. Hence, it is not necessary to visit doctor for many times per year for treating colds. (这一句就不用了) Therefore, the relationship between eating a substantial amount of fish and the low times for the treatment of colds in nearby EM is not credible.

Secondly, even if the eating substantial amount of fish indeed prevent(s) colds, however, if using lchthaid daily, a nuritional supplement derived from fish oil, can prevent colds is skepstical. (这个ts也太长了) The arguer fails to show enough evidence to present that the function of treating colds between using lchthaid and eating fish is identical. (一直到了这里都是空话) Perhaps eating fish can prevent colds due to the other nutritional supplement but not lchthaid. (other nutritional到了这一步了就死活不肯说下去到底是哪些....) Or perhaps cold is prevented due to the coaction of Lchthaid and the other nutrition from fish. (这一句不错) If so, using Lchthaid cannot prevent cold effectively. Hence, the conclusion is still doubtful.

Morever, even if using Lchthaid can prevent colds, but if the absenteeism will decrease that (去掉) is questionable in EM. The arguer fails to certify that absenteeism merely results in (用反了?) catching cold in MA. (这句话不知所云) Perhaps most of people in EA like relaxed life, (这个理由...) so they often take catching cold as a excuse to take a rest. Granted that catching cold is only (让步成only的话前面应该是攻击别的原因,而不是说感冒只是一种借口.) reason of absenteeism, but if using Lchthaid in EA will bring the same effect as consuming eat in nearby EA that unconvincing. Perhaps using Lchthaid is not useful for the people of EA. (到这里彻底乱了.前面攻击对于感冒是否有用,这个本身就是对于WM的了,怎么后面再来攻击地域的原因.) If so, it waste(s) money to using Lchthaid for the people who are absent only due to colds. (这句句法也不对) Thereby, the recommendation is not authentic.

To sum up, lacking credible evidence, the aruger can not give the recommendation rashly. To support the conclusion, the arguer should provide more information to prove that there is necessary relationship between the low times for the treatment of colds and high eating fish in nearby EM. To more evalute the conclusion, the arguer should support more details about lchthaid and people in EM.

前两短还勉强保持着清醒
到了最后一个body终于乱了
应该是限时的原因吧
继续加油

annlyseaUID: 2219320

谢谢小Q的修改
学校的网络一直down着，今天才能用~
回头好好研究一下
最近一直在写
感觉好多了~