Argument242

IloveissuetooUID：2323606

怎。。怎么字这么大？改改。。
The following appeared as an editorial in the student newspaper of
Groveton College.
"To combat the recently reported dramatic rise in cheating among college
and university students, these institutions should adopt honor codes
similar to Groveton's, which calls for students to agree not to cheat in
their academic endeavors and to notify a faculty member if they suspect
that others have cheated. Groveton's honor code replaced an old-fashioned
system in which students were closely monitored by teachers and an average
of thirty cases of cheating per year were reported. The honor code has
proven far more successful: in the first year it was in place, students
reported twenty-one cases of cheating; five years later, this figure had
dropped to fourteen. Moreover, in a recent survey conducted by the
Groveton honor council, a majority of students said that they would be
less likely to cheat with an honor code in place than without."

WORDS: 414

The author recommends in this editorial that institutions that suffer from increasing students' cheating should adopt a similar 'honor codes' to Groceton's. It appears to be helpful at first glance; after all, an honor code is designed to reduce student cheating. However, careful scrutiny reveals that the argument is quite limited, in that it suffers from several logic fallacies.

To begin with, the cited data that reported cases of cheating have reduced from an average of 30 to 14 during the five years are not sufficient to validate the measure's success. Reported number does not necessarily reflect the truth, because it relies too heavily on a sense of justness--which usually means nothing, compared with 'friendship' in an adolescent's eyes. Perhaps students have learnt to build small 'communities' that assures safety of cheating in the academic endeavors. In this case, the absence of teachers' monitoring only facilitates cheating activities. Without firm evidence that proves changes in the actual number of case of cheating, it is difficult to assess the efficiency of the honor codes.

In addition, the recent survey conducted by Groceton honor council lends little support to prove the codes' effectiveness. The result that students would be less likely to cheat with an honor code than without actually betrays the lethal disadvantage of the measure: as long as some individuals do not have an honor code in place, their tendency of cheating would hardly decrease at all, yet with every student owning one, the honor codes become merely a garnishry.

Finally yet importantly, even if the measure has proved successful in Groceton College, it may not work as well in other institutions. The measure of honor codes would be largely dependent on the values and ideas towards 'honor' among the students. Therefore, it is extremely important to take into account the differences of opinions of students in other places. It is entirely possible that students in other institutions generally do not care as much about honor given by the institution administration. Unless the author can convince me that the situation in Gorceton typifies that of most other colleges and universities, the conclusion drawn would seem premature.

In sum, the argument is based on a series of unwarranted assumptions, and is therefore unpersuasive. To better evaluate the honor codes measure, I will need more detailed and reliable information concerning changes in Groceton students' opinions on cheating. I also want to know whether the situation in Groceton would typify that in other institutions.

如果版主大人看到，请打一个分... 谢谢




[ 本帖最后由 Iloveissuetoo 于 2007-4-18 17:04 编辑 ]

ploploUID：2320001

汗一个先，是242，不是42~找了好半天的说~


The author recommends in this editorial that institutions that suffer from increasing students' cheating should adopt a similar 'honor codes' to Groceton's. It appears to be helpful at first glance; after all, an honor code is designed to reduce student cheating. However, careful scrutiny reveals that the argument is quite limited, in that it suffers from several logic fallacies.

To begin with, the cited data that reported cases of cheating have reduced from an average of 30 to 14 during the five years are not sufficient to validate the measure's success. Reported number does not necessarily reflect the truth, because it relies too heavily on a sense of justness--which usually means nothing, compared with 'friendship' in an adolescent's eyes. Perhaps students have learnt to build small 'communities' that assures safety of cheating in the academic endeavors. In this case, the absence of teachers' monitoring only facilitates cheating activities. Without firm evidence that proves changes in the actual number of case of cheating, it is difficult to assess the efficiency of the honor codes. （第一段不错，比较严谨，接着往下看）

In addition, the recent survey conducted by Groceton honor council lends little support to prove the codes' effectiveness. The mere fact that students would be less likely to cheat with an honor code than without actually betrays the lethal disadvantage of the measure（相当难读懂，事实上我没读懂……实话）: as long as some individuals do not have an honor code in place, their tendency of cheating would hardly decrease at all, yet with every student owning one, the honor codes become merely an garnishry. （这段比较混乱，说code未必有效，就要指出可能哪里无效，个人认为这个方面比较难写，不如可以接着对上一段让步，比如说，即使调查结果是真实的，同学不作弊未必是因为这个code，可能其它原因之类的）
Finally yet importantly, even if the measure has proved successful in Groceton College, it may not work as well in other institutions. The measure of honor codes would be largely dependent on the values and ideas towards 'honor' among the students. Therefore, it is extremely important to take into account the differences of opinions of students in other places. It is entirely possible that students in other institutions generally do not care as much about honor given by the institution administration. Unless the author can convince me that the situation in Gorceton typifies that of most other colleges and universities, the conclusion drawn would seem premature. （恩，这段就比较干脆了，痛打落水狗，argu就该这样。也可以说说每个学校的管理体系不同，G适合别的学校未必适合，这样更周全些）
In sum, the argument is based on a series of unwarranted assumptions, and is therefore unpersuasive. To better evaluate the honor codes measure, I will need more detailed and reliable information concerning changes in Groceton students' opinions on cheating. I also want to know whether the situation in Groceton would typify that in other institutions.

ploploUID：2320001

ps.感谢给我issue的批改~
听你这么一说我感觉也很貌似偏题了
恩~
想象怎么能改好些~
还有~
你的文章不错的~尤其语言挺好的~加油了~

IloveissuetooUID：2323606

谢谢
Body2的问题: 这个大汗，我本来也是想让步成未必是code's effect，写到一半想起这个了，一种无法抑制的冲动让我又删了重写==所以超时了半分钟 (打字慢，一点时间都不能耽误:mad )
这段是说原文中"a majority of students said that they would be less likely to cheat with an honor code in place than without"这句话其实是disprove了论点(i.e. betrays a lethal disadvantage)

ploploUID：2320001

400+就算是正常速度不能算是慢了:rolleyes:
ps.我英语比较懒~
betrays a lethal disadvantage
应该怎么翻~~呵呵~:)

IloveissuetooUID：2323606

betray是暴露吧..
觉得那个写得有点傻,呵呵
400+是考到word里改完的字数,本来是397左右.. 哭..

speaklessUID：2205899

字数并不是关键的,A400 I500已经是比较正常的标准了....
要把字数放在最关键的地方:)

iq28UID：2152875

The author recommends in this editorial that institutions that suffer from increasing students' cheating should adopt a similar 'honor codes' to Groceton's. It appears to be helpful at first glance; after all, an honor code is designed to reduce student cheating. However, careful scrutiny reveals that the argument is quite limited, in that it suffers from several logic fallacies.

To begin with, the cited data that reported cases of cheating have reduced from an average of 30 to 14 during the five years are not sufficient to validate the measure's success. (标准的ts写法.不过还是太长.次要的信息不要写,除非下面要针对之大做文章) Reported number (点明了,是后期hc方案下学生汇报的数据) does not necessarily reflect the truth, because it relies too heavily on a sense of justness (点明是学生的正义感) --which usually means nothing, compared with 'friendship' in an adolescent's eyes. (写得太玄.首先要明确点出学生报告的数据不是真实数据) Perhaps students have learnt to build small 'communities' that assures safety of cheating in the academic endeavors. (这里已经又递进的味道了,不要简单用一个perhaps糊弄过去) In this case, the absence of teachers' monitoring only facilitates cheating activities. Without firm evidence that proves changes in the actual number of case of cheating, it is difficult to assess the efficiency of the honor codes.

In addition, the recent survey conducted by Groceton honor council lends little support to prove the codes' effectiveness. The result that students would be less likely to cheat with an honor code than without actually betrays the lethal disadvantage of the measure: as long as some individuals do not have an honor code in place, their tendency of cheating would hardly decrease at all, (why) yet with every student owning one, the honor codes become merely a garnishry. (这段基本没看懂)(又看了一遍,还是没懂, sigh)

Finally yet importantly, even if the measure has proved successful in Groceton College, it may not work as well in other institutions. The measure of honor codes would be largely dependent on the values and ideas towards 'honor' among the students. Therefore, it is extremely important to take into account the differences of opinions of students in other places. It is entirely possible that students in other institutions generally do not care as much about honor given by the institution administration. Unless the author can convince me that the situation in Gorceton typifies that of most other colleges and universities, the conclusion drawn would seem premature. (点出一下G学院的学生还是比较重视honor的比较好.别的都不错.嗯)

In sum, the argument is based on a series of unwarranted assumptions, and is therefore unpersuasive. To better evaluate the honor codes measure, I will need more detailed and reliable information concerning changes in Groceton students' opinions on cheating. I also want to know whether the situation in Groceton would typify that in other institutions.

写得挺有自己想法的
不过第二个body实在没看懂
看你的回帖说事实上那句话是disprove了论点也没有说出理由

ploploUID：2320001

原帖由 Iloveissuetoo 于 2007-4-18 17:07 发表
betray是暴露吧..
觉得那个写得有点傻,呵呵
400+是考到word里改完的字数,本来是397左右.. 哭..

呵呵~既然顶起来了就说说关于betray~
貌似基本都理解文背叛了~
这里可以换作reveal~
个人观点~
:rolleyes:

IloveissuetooUID：2323606

To begin with, the cited data that reported cases of cheating have reduced during the five years are not sufficient to validate the measure's success. Reported number does not necessarily reflect the truth, because it relies too heavily on a sense of justice--which usually means nothing, compared with 'friendship' in an adolescent's eyes. Therefore the data lacks reliability. Furthermore, students may even learn to build small 'communities' that assures safety of cheating in the academic endeavors. In this case, the absence of teachers' monitoring only facilitates cheating activities. Without firm evidence that proves changes in the actual number of case of cheating, it is difficult to assess the efficiency of the honor codes.
Granted that the situation in G truly got better after enforcement of the honor codes, the author fails to prove that all credits go to the codes. It is entirely possible that any number of other factors have contributed to the improvement, for instance, more rigorous punishment for cheating, lowered emphasis on grades, or even increased pressure for job-hunting. Either of the above scenarios, if true, can serve to undermine the speaker's claim.

按照意见, 第一段加了一句话(汗,是不是我没理解好.. 还是觉得not necessarily reflect the truth就足以说明not true了..我说话比较懒的缘故么= =)
第二段重写了,那个让步..

谢谢各位指教:loveliness: