[0710G-summer小组]第二次作业Issue093+Argument017

laststrikeUID: 2318203

Syllabus:
1 承认个人的确受到了束缚。
2 但是，'individual responsibility'是真实存在的
3 'individual responsibility'作用巨大。

TOPIC: ISSUE93 - "The concept of 'individual responsibility' is a necessary fiction. Although societies must hold individuals accountable for their own actions, people's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making."
WORDS: 696          TIME: 00:45:00          DATE: 7/19/2007 12:20:02 PM

I partially agree with the author on the point that people's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making. However, in my view, the concept of 'individual responsibility' is not what the speaker claimed that is a necessary fiction; in fact, it is the need of us and the driving force of our society.

Admittedly, I concede with the author that as an individual in the society, one is inevitably influenced by his/her parents, relatives, friends, teachers, mass media and restricted by laws and moral standards. To better illustrate this view, I need to discuss about the life time of an individual. The first and foremost teacher of an individual, when he/she was born, is his/her parents. Their value system and perspective of the world are imparted to their children when they first speak, think and write. Then, in the public educational system he/she receives professional teaching, which translates the knowledge, well judgment, and wisdom, that human beings accumulated for thousands of years, into information that could be retained by him/her. As in the modern society, mass media, which always surrounds us, often passes their view on the political events, activities and atmosphere to individuals. Also as a highly ordered and peaceful society, each individual is required to follow the restrictions which are enforced by laws and moral standards. Law enforcements would put severe penalty on anyone who dears to violates the restriction, therefore, we can live in a stabilized society which ensures us no discrimination and good welfare. At this point, I strongly assent with the author that people's behavior is mainly determined by standards set by parents, teachers, laws and moral.

However, is that merely because we are restricted by these standards we should not emphasis on the individuality and responsibility? Obviously, no. The sense of individuality is aroused by our desperate urge of self-identity and the ambition of being success. Firstly, as a human being people are born with the same physical condition, the same leg, arm, and head. Even the educational system imparts us the same knowledge, judgment, and wisdom. Without any distinctive features that could different one from the rest, we become desperate and anxious. Thus, an unstoppable urge to establish a distinctive feature, in this case, the individuality, of self-identity is aroused. Secondly, another psychological urge to be success also amounts to people's seeking of individuality. Modern society put much emphasis on the financial gaining, quick fame, and right choices that nearly everyone in the society wishes to be one of those successful businessmen, such as Bill Gates, Steve Jobs and Michael Dell. It is indubitable that these celebrities are distinctive from the rest of people in one point, their individuality. Bill Gates opens the gate which makes the computer common in life; Steve Jobs establishes the way the high-tech products are also fashionable; Michael Dell teaches us that the cost of computer could be cut sharply just like other common commodities. In short, individuality is the urge of our internal psychological needs rather than external forces.

In addition, the responsibility of different professions also amounts to the advance of the society. A judgment would seem his authority to ensure that justice among the people; teacher would believe that they are deem to impart the knowledge to the future of human beings; doctors should convicts that their responsibility is to save the lives; scientists would love to investigate the origin of the world; police officers would seem to ensure the stability of the people is their first priority; historians would wish to dig the mysterious among the historical events. All these senses of responsibilities are the fundamental force that drives our discipline advance, our society health and wealth. Therefore, the sense of 'individual responsibility' is actually exist, not necessary fictional, among the people and the driving force of human civility.

In sum, according to the analysis I presented, it is safe to conclude that the behaviors of human beings are largely determined by the standards that set by the whole society. However, the pursuit of individuality is, in fact, an urge of our psychological needs. Furthermore, the personal responsibility of different professions drives our world forward.


TOPIC: ARGUMENT17 - The following appeared in a letter to the editor of the Walnut Grove town newspaper.

"Walnut Grove's town council has advocated switching from EZ Disposal (which has had the contract for trash collection services in Walnut Grove for the past ten years) to ABC Waste, because EZ recently raised its monthly fee from $2,000 to $2,500 a month, whereas ABC's fee is still $2,000. But the town council is mistaken; we should continue using EZ. EZ collects trash twice a week, while ABC collects only once. Moreover, EZ-which, like ABC, currently has a fleet of 20 trucks-has ordered additional trucks. Finally, EZ provides exceptional service: 80 percent of respondents to last year's town survey agreed that they were 'satisfied' with EZ's performance."
WORDS: 550          TIME: 00:30:00          DATE: 7/19/2007 12:20:02 PM

In this letter to the Walnut Grove(WG) town newspaper the author recommends that WG should continue to use EZ rather than switch to ABC Waste to collect their garbage. To support his claim, he cites the fact the author reasons that EZ collects trash twice a week while ABC collects once a week. In addition, he reasons that EZ and ABC both currently has a 20 trucks and ordered additional trucks. Further more, in a recent survey 80% of respondents in last year 'satisfied' with EZ' performance. At the first glance, the argument seems somehow plausible. However, after a clear reflection, it suffered from several logic fallacies.

To begin with, the author falsely implies that a major factor that WG switch to ABC is due to EZ increase their fee while ABC maintains the same. It might not be the case. Perhaps the major reason that WG switch its trash collection to ABC is because of the advance garbage disposal technology. It is possible that EZ is a traditional landfill garbage agency, which exerts great dangers to the environment and possible threats to the health and safety to the residents of WG, while ABC takes advantage of modern biochemical techniques to dispose the trash. Without concern about such factors, the author can not convince me that the major reason WG switch to ABC is because they maintain a relative low fee.

In addition, even assuming the price is a major factor, the author falsely equate the trash collection times with the efficiency of the service. It is possible that WG holds a relatively small population which could produce limited trash that any agency only need collect them once a week. Therefore, the second time trash collection seems redundant, and in fact is the waste of the money of the community. Without given more information about the necessity of the twice trash collection, the author can not convince me that twice a week is more efficient than once a week.

Moreover, the author falsely concludes that the number of trucks equates with the efficiency of trash collection. The author provides no evidence to prove that the volume of the both 20 trucks is the same and the future trucks of EZ would be used as trash collection. It is possible that the newly purchased cars would be used as other purpose as taxi and the volume of EZ's is smaller than ABC's. Thus, without this vital information, the author can not use the number of trucks as solid proof to justify his claim.

Finally, the author unjustly suggests that EZ's performance would be superior to ABC's based and questionable on biased survey. Without the exact number of WG's population and the respondents, the representation of the survey is undermined. And, it is possible that those who satisfied with EZ's service were more incline to conduct the survey which could be a small portion. Furthermore, there includes no evidence to prove that ABC's performance would be inferior to EZ's, maybe the residents would be more satisfy with ABC's service than EZ's. Without the enough evidence to prove that ABC's performance is questionable, the author can not convince me that the decision is incorrect.

In sum, to better strengthen the claim, the author should provide more specific evidence to prove EZ is better.

name05UID: 2291624

修改好了
https://bbs.gter.net/viewthre ... &extra=page%3D1

顺便给我指点一下

AutobotsUID: 2364368

I partially agree with the author on the point that people's behavior is largely determined by forces not of their own making. However, in my view, the concept of 'individual responsibility' is not what the speaker claimed that is a necessary fiction; in fact, it is the need of us and the driving force of our society.
Admittedly, I concede with the author that as an individual in the society, one is inevitably influenced by his/her parents, relatives, friends, teachers, mass media and restricted by laws and moral standards. To better illustrate this view, I need to discuss about the life time of an individual. The first and foremost teacher of an individual, when he/she was born, is his/her parents. Their value system and perspective of the world are imparted to their children when they first speak, think and write. Then, in the public educational system he/she receives professional teaching, which translates the knowledge, well judgment, and wisdom, that human beings accumulated for thousands of years, into information that could be retained by him/her. As in the modern society, mass media, which always surrounds us, often passes their view on the political events, activities and atmosphere to individuals. Also as a highly ordered and peaceful society, each individual is required to follow the restrictions which are enforced by laws and moral standards. Law enforcements would put severe penalty on anyone who (dears)dares to (violates)violate the restriction, therefore, we can live in a stabilized society which ensures us no discrimination and good welfare. At this point, I strongly assent with the author that people's behavior is mainly determined by standards set by parents, teachers, laws and moral.
However, is that merely because we are restricted by these standards we should not emphasis on the individuality and responsibility? Obviously, no. The sense of individuality is aroused by our desperate urge of self-identity and the ambition of being success. Firstly, as (a human being people)单复数不一致？ are born with the same physical condition, the same leg, arm, and head. Even the educational system imparts us the same knowledge, judgment, and wisdom. Without any distinctive features that could different one from the rest, we become desperate and anxious. Thus, an unstoppable urge to establish a distinctive feature, in this case, the individuality, of self-identity is aroused. Secondly, another psychological urge to be success also amounts to people's seeking of individuality. Modern society put much emphasis on the financial gaining, quick fame, and right choices that nearly everyone in the society wishes to be one of those successful businessmen, such as Bill Gates, Steve Jobs and Michael Dell. It is indubitable that these celebrities are distinctive from the rest of people in one point, their individuality. Bill Gates opens the gate which makes the computer common in life; Steve Jobs establishes the (way the)the notion that high-tech products are also fashionable; Michael Dell teaches us that the cost of computer could be cut sharply just like other common commodities. In short, individuality is the urge of our internal psychological needs rather than external forces.
In addition, the responsibility of different professions also amounts to the advance of the society. A (judgment)judge would (seem)好像不及物，可以这样用吗？ his authority to ensure that justice among the people;(teacher)teachers would believe that they are deem to impart the knowledge to the future of human beings巧妙比喻孩子，但是很隐晦，担心外国人不懂; doctors should convicts that their responsibility is to save the lives; scientists would love to investigate the (origin)principle of the world; police officers would seem to ensure the stability of the people is their first priority; historians would wish to dig the mysterious among the historical events. All these senses of responsibilities are the fundamental force that drives our discipline advance, our society health and wealth. Therefore, the sense of 'individual responsibility' is actually exist, not necessary fictional, among the people and the driving force of human civility.
In sum, according to the analysis I presented, it is safe to conclude that the behaviors of human beings are largely determined by the standards that set by the whole society. However, the pursuit of individuality is, in fact, an urge of our psychological needs. Furthermore, the personal responsibility of different professions drives our world forward.

这么短的时间写得如此完善很了不起，论证流畅，层层深入！帮你挑了些小错，呵，可能是句子写长了容易忽视。倒数第二段的排比很有气势，但是希望你能再研究一下seem的相关用法，而且意思上有猜测的意味在里面，可能会弱化例证。

TOPIC: ARGUMENT17 - The following appeared in a letter to the editor of the Walnut Grove town newspaper.
"Walnut Grove's town council has advocated switching from EZ Disposal (which has had the contract for trash collection services in Walnut Grove for the past ten years) to ABC Waste, because EZ recently raised its monthly fee from $2,000 to $2,500 a month, whereas ABC's fee is still $2,000. But the town council is mistaken; we should continue using EZ. EZ collects trash twice a week, while ABC collects only once. Moreover, EZ-which, like ABC, currently has a fleet of 20 trucks-has ordered additional trucks. Finally, EZ provides exceptional service: 80 percent of respondents to last year's town survey agreed that they were 'satisfied' with EZ's performance."
WORDS: 550          TIME: 00:30:00          DATE: 7/19/2007 12:20:02 PM
In this letter to the Walnut Grove(WG) town newspaper the author recommends that WG should continue to use EZ rather than switch to ABC Waste to collect their garbage. To support his claim, he cites the fact the author reasons that EZ collects trash twice a week while ABC collects once a week. In addition, he reasons that EZ and ABC both currently has a 20 trucks and ordered additional trucks. Further more, in a recent survey 80% of respondents in last year 'satisfied' with EZ' performance. At the first glance, the argument seems somehow plausible. However, after a clear reflection, it suffered from several logic fallacies.
To begin with, the author falsely implies that a major factor that WG switch to ABC is due to EZ increase their fee while ABC maintains the same. It might not be the case. Perhaps the major reason that WG switch its trash collection to ABC is because of the advance garbage disposal technology. It is possible that EZ is a traditional landfill garbage agency, which exerts great dangers to the environment and possible threats to the health and safety to the residents of WG, while ABC takes advantage of modern biochemical techniques to dispose the trash. Without concern about such factors, the author can not convince me that the major reason WG switch to ABC is because they maintain a relative low fee.
In addition, even assuming the price is a major factor, the author falsely (equate)equates the trash collection times with the efficiency of the service. It is possible that WG holds a relatively small population which could produce limited trash that any agency only (need)needs to collect them once a week. Therefore, the second time trash collection seems redundant, and in fact is the waste of the money of the community. Without given more information about the necessity of the twice trash collection, the author can not convince me that twice a week is more efficient than once a week.
Moreover, the author falsely concludes that the number of trucks equates with the efficiency of trash collection. The author provides no evidence to prove that the volume of the both 20 trucks is the same and the future trucks of EZ would be used as trash collection. It is possible that the newly purchased cars would be used as other purpose as taxi and the volume of EZ's is smaller than ABC's. Thus, without this vital information, the author can not use the number of trucks as solid proof to justify his claim.
Finally, the author unjustly suggests that EZ's performance would be superior to ABC's based and questionable on biased survey. Without the exact number of WG's population and the respondents, the representation of the survey is undermined. And, it is possible that those who satisfied with EZ's service were more incline to conduct the survey which could be a small portion. Furthermore, there includes no evidence to prove that ABC's performance would be inferior to EZ's, maybe the residents would be more satisfy with ABC's service than EZ's. Without the enough evidence to prove that ABC's performance is questionable, the author can not convince me that the decision is incorrect.
In sum, to better strengthen the claim, the author should provide more specific evidence to prove EZ is better.
论述有力！行家！

pinuoUID: 2328081

In addition, the responsibility of different professions also amounts to the advance of the society. A (judgment)judge would (seem)好像不及物，可以这样用吗？ his authority to ensure that justice among the people;(teacher)teachers would believe that they are deem to impart the knowledge to the future of human beings巧妙比喻孩子，但是很隐晦，担心外国人不懂; doctors should convicts that their responsibility is to save the lives; scientists would love to investigate the (origin)principle of the world; police officers would seem to ensure the stability of the people is their first priority(police officers always regard preserving public order as their duty ); historians would wish to dig the mysterious among the historical events. All these senses of responsibilities are the fundamental force that drives our discipline advance, our society health and wealth. Therefore, the sense of 'individual responsibility' is actually exist, not necessary fictional, among the people and the driving force of human civility.
很佩服搂主的文笔，读起来很顺，思路和文笔都很顺的。能在给你改一些感到很荣幸。