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[未归类] Issue214 我的第一篇issue征网友护改 [复制链接]

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发表于 2007-8-3 09:39:42 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览
214."Society should identify those children who have special talents and abilities and begin training them at an early age so that they can eventually excel in their areas of ability. Otherwise. these talents are likely to remain undeveloped."

:)

Determining whether our society should identify those children with special talents and abilities and begin training them at an early age could be weighted in many aspects. As to this controversial issue, different people may have different answers due to their respective points of view or various experiences. On balance, in my opinion, I agree with the speaker on the grounds that identifying and training them at an early age can not only develop their potential talents and abilities fully but also contribute to form specific education methods for them, although overemphasizing it may induce the neglect of common children.   

:)

Firstly, identifying and training these children at an early age can dig their talents and potentials in the fullest extent. Previous study has shown that the potentials decrease gradually with the increase of age, which to some extent support that the talents and abilities should be exploited early. For example, both the key phases of language studying and instruction studying are before five years old. Certain training in early stage may initiate individual’s potentials that might otherwise be denied the chance of development. Another case in point is the early music education of Beethoven, who was made to practice the violin when he was four years old. As a result, this eight-year-old boy had won the tremendous success in his first performance. Had he not received special and early education in early time, he might loss the opportunity to kindling his potentials and our society would loss a great musician. On the contrary, many children may have certain talents, but due to some reasons such as that they are not identified or trained with special education, they do not have the opportunity to develop these talents.

:)

In addition, identifying and training the children with talents and abilities are beneficial to develop a professional education way in which they will be trained. For example, the process that the educator find and train the children who are excellent in music can help the educator develop a suitable, comprehensive and purposeful education way for these children to exploit their art potentials. Suppose that they had not been trained by especial and right art curriculum, they might become common persons in the aspect of music due to the undeveloped talents and abilities. In other words, if people cannot identify these children, not to mention form specific education methods for them, the children might grow up in usual way and not be excellent in future. Identifying and training the excellent children are crucial to develop appropriate methods for them.   

:)

Admittedly, there is no denying that overemphasizing the education on these children with special talents and abilities will induce the neglect of the common children. For instance, Einstein was not good at learning so that his Greek and Latin language teacher usually overlooked him, and even detested him. It never occurs to this teacher that the Einstein became the most famous scientist in the world. This apt example illustrates that the common children should be given some emphasis as well as the excellent children.

:)

In conclusion, although overemphasizing the children with special talents and abilities would bring some problems, our society should focus on identifying and training them at an early age in order to develop fully their potentials.



[ 本帖最后由 pw120_2001 于 2007-8-4 18:00 编辑 ]
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发表于 2007-8-4 23:09:04 |只看该作者
Determining whether our society should identify those children with special talents and abilities and begin training them at an early age could be weighted in many aspects. As to this controversial issue, different people may have different answers due to their respective points of view or various experiences. On balance, in my opinion, I agree with the speaker on the grounds that identifying and training them at an early age can not only develop their potential talents and abilities fully but also contribute to form specific education methods for them, although overemphasizing it may induce the neglect of common children.  (开头挺清晰,不错)

Firstly, identifying and training these children at an early age can dig their talents and potentials in the fullest extent. Previous study has shown that the potentials decrease gradually with the increase of age, which to some extent support that the talents and abilities should be exploited early. For example, both the key phases of language studying and instruction studying are before five years old. Certain training in early stage may initiate individual’s potentials that might otherwise be denied the chance of development. Another case in point is the early music education of Beethoven, who was made to practice the violin when he was four years old. As a result, this eight-year-old boy had won the tremendous success in his first performance. Had he not received special and early education in early time, he might loss the opportunity to kindling his potentials and our society would loss a great musician. On the contrary, many children may have certain talents, but due to some reasons such as that they are not identified or trained with special education, they do not have the opportunity to develop these talents.(这段写得不错)

In addition, identifying and training the children with talents and abilities are beneficial to develop a professional education way in which they will be trained. For example, the process that the educator find and train the children who are excellent in music can help the educator develop a suitable, comprehensive and purposeful education way for these children to exploit their art potentials. Suppose that they had not been trained by especial and right art curriculum, they might become common persons in the aspect of music due to the undeveloped talents and abilities. In other words, if people cannot identify these children, not to mention form specific education methods for them, the children might grow up in usual way and not be excellent in future. Identifying and training the excellent children are crucial to develop appropriate methods for them. (这段总体上和上段很相似,分成2个层次有些牵强了,其实完全可以在培养天才对社会的益处方面提高一些层次,毕竟上段主要讲的是个人的利益)   
:)
Admittedly, there is no denying that overemphasizing the education on these children with special talents and abilities will induce the neglect of the common children. For instance, Einstein was not good at learning so that his Greek and Latin language teacher usually overlooked him, and even detested him.(这个例子举的不好,学习差而忽视他和因为培养天才而忽视他是两码事) It never occurs to this teacher that the Einstein became the most famous scientist in the world. This apt example illustrates that the common children should be given some emphasis as well as the excellent children.
:)
In conclusion, although overemphasizing the children with special talents and abilities would bring some problems, our society should focus on identifying and training them at an early age in order to develop fully their potentials.

语言挺成熟,结构安排得也不错,就是选取的角度和例子有的不太合适,多在立意上下下功夫就没问题了
寻10fall去费城的朋友~

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RE: Issue214 我的第一篇issue征网友护改 [修改]

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