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Argument38 【0710G-HIT坚持交作业小组】第八次作业
1.看病少不一定生病少
2.买鱼不一定吃鱼
3.不一定真是因为感冒而缺席
4.Ichthaid可能不含有效成分
按照常理1,3,4很强,2稍弱,但也不是没有可能;另外,还有一种可能是:即使那个地方的人真的少得感冒,这和吃鱼之间也许并没有直接因果关系。
TOPIC: ARGUMENT38 - The following memo appeared in the newsletter of the West Meria Public Health Council.
"An innovative treatment has come to our attention that promises to significantly reduce absenteeism in our schools and workplaces. A study reports that in nearby East Meria, where fish consumption is very high, people visit the doctor only once or twice per year for the treatment of colds. Clearly, eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent colds. Since colds are the reason most frequently given for absences from school and work, we recommend the daily use of Ichthaid, a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil, as a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeism."
WORDS: 402 TIME: 00:37:31 DATE: 2007-8-7 16:00:58
The argument is well present but not logically reasoning。 The author hastily concludes to the result without giving sufficient evidence. What is more, the assumption that the article stands on may not be fully proved. Thus, the conclusion is lack of persuasive.(经典开头,但是否模板痕迹太强,而和题目联系不够紧密呢?)
To begin with, the fact that people in nearby East Meria visit doctor only a few times per year do not necessarily indicate that the incidence of colds is at a low level. It is possible that the people live there do not have the habit to go for a doctor or they may not have enough money to pay for doctors, thus the situation may exist that people get cold but they do not go to doctor. As a result, their low frequency of going for doctors may not reflect the incidence of colds accurately. (这点讲得很清楚)
Even if it is true that the number of people who get colds there is lower than other places, either could the casual relationship between fish and colds be well supported, unless more reasoning could be given. It is entirely possible that people who consume fish do not really eat them. They may have a custom to use the fish as decorations. Consequently, the statement, saying that eating more fish can prevent colds, is doubtable.(貌似把“吃鱼和少的感冒没有直接因果关系”这个事情点明,可以说有其他的因素导致少感冒)
Moreover, the reason of the absences from school and work may not due to the colds as the article claimed. As we know, when employees want to ask from one day off and could not found a proper reason, most of them may lie to the manager that they got colds. Therefore, the real reason of the absences may not be the cold but the employees' personal affairs. Hence, the effect of Ichthaid as recommended is unconvincing.
In addition, even if in fishes really exists a substance that can prevent colds, no evidence provided to show the ingredient composed of the Ichthaid include that substance. In that case, the nutritional supplement could still be useless. As a result, the recommendation may not be believable. (很简炼德讲出了Ichathaid可能没有有效物质)
In sum, the author of this memo fails to provide enough evidence to prove eating fish can prevent colds and the recommendation is also unreasonable. In order to strengthen his points, a survey on the real incident of colds nearby East Marie and a comparison experiment should be implemented to reveal the relationship between fish and colds. Moreover, the recommendation should be made more careful.
整体还是不错的,结构和套话运用都很熟练了,逻辑上,3个点很强,有一个点有点牵强或者说没点明。 继续努力! |
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