issue154 勇往直前小组

zhangjing106UID：2157010

Education is an important affair to both students and educators, both parests and communities. In the issue, the speaker declaims that besides professional educatiors, parents and communities also should take part in the local schools. I agree with the broad assertion of the speaker. In the detailed methods to implement this idea, I consider that parents and communities should choose proper ways to participate in education.

At the beginning of all, I agree with the speaker that both parents and communities must be involved in the local schools. Nowadays, education is an important standard to evalue that developing levels of nations and countries. We can see that the developed countires always have the best systems of educations, which have activate all factors arround educations and students. For example, in the United States students of primary schools usually have some homeworks needing to do with their parents or relatives. Such kinds of homeworks could attract parents in the education of the local schools. Moreover, departments of communities usually control some budgets of educations. In China, besides educational departments of communities, there are some other communities are involved in the local schools. Some communities provide working positions for students to practice in society. Some communities bring a lot of money for poor students to help them finish their school works. Because parents and communities could do many crucial works for education assistant to professional educatores, the broad assertion of the speaker is reasonal to advance education scientifically.

However, the speaker should give more detailed information about his suggestion. Because both parents and communities are not professional as educators, they often do some improper actions to education. In the following parts, I will discuss this problem further in order to analyze completely.

Firstly, because praents always use to excessly love children, parents should be trained by professional educators to teach their children in right methods. In some families, scientific educational methods are hard to pratice constantly which are not positive for education. Parents easily give up schedules because of children's request. Or some parents would implement educational plans by their points or experience which are not corrent to their children's education. In these instances, parents should be trained often by professional teachers of their children to accept right opinions about home-education which is an important part of education.

Secondly, communities should also be trained to be known about scientific education. Communities always play important roles in educations. In local schools, professional educators always ask students to take part in local activities of communities. Therefore, communities should often organize proper practicing plans for different age students. For example, for little age students communities could bring them to natural parks or zooes to help them contact with nature. For university students, communities could provide some actural positions in companies or community departments to help them konw social requests well to choose better jobs after they graduate.

In summary, the opinion of the speaker is persuasive enough. Education is a systemic work which need both parents and communities involving in besides a group of professional educators. If parents and communities could take part in the local schools properly, education could develop better than before.

xiongnashiongUID：2359406

Education is an important affair to both students and educators, both parests and communities. In the issue, the speaker declaims that besides professional educatiors, parents and communities also should take part in the local schools. I agree with the broad assertion of the speaker. In the detailed methods to implement this idea, I consider that parents and communities should choose proper ways to participate in education.让步开头 蛮清晰

At the beginning of all, I agree with the speaker that both parents and communities must be involved in the local schools. Nowadays, education is an important standard to evaluate that (不要)developing levels of nations and countries. We can see that the developed countires always have the best systems of educations, which have activate all factors arround educations and students.（这句话说出来和你的TS没有任何关系啊） For example, in the United States students of primary schools usually have some homework needing to do with their parents or relatives. Such kinds of homework could attract parents in the education of the local schools. Moreover, departments of communities usually control some budgets of educations. In China, besides educational departments of communities, there are some other communities are involved in the local schools. Some communities provide working positions for students to practice in society. Some communities bring a lot of money for poor students to help them finish their school works. Because parents and communities could do many crucial works for education assistant to professional educatores, the broad assertion of the speaker is reasonal to advance education scientifically.（我觉得你很好的证明了 家长和社区要参与到教育中来，但是没有说 参与到学校的教育中来，联系不明显，当然 家长的那个联系的很好，但是社区的差了一些）

However, the speaker should give more detailed information about his suggestion. Because both parents and communities are not professional as educators, they often do some improper actions to education. （这个地方我又迷糊了，刚开始的主题很清晰啊，要拨的话也是针对学校教育中参与过多啊，怎么变成了通吃了）In the following parts, I will discuss this problem further in order to analyze completely.

Firstly, because praents always use to excessly love children, parents should be trained by professional educators to teach their children in right methods. In some families, scientific educational methods are hard to pratice constantly which are not positive for education. Parents easily give up schedules because of children's request. Or some parents would implement educational plans by their points or experience which are not corrent to their children's education. In these instances, parents should be trained often by professional teachers of their children to accept right opinions about home-education which is an important part of education.

Secondly, communities should also be trained to be known about scientific education. Communities always play important roles in educations. In local schools, professional educators always ask students to take part in local activities of communities. Therefore, communities should often organize proper practicing plans for different age students. For example, for little age students communities could bring them to natural parks or zooes to help them contact with nature. For university students, communities could provide some actural positions in companies or community departments to help them konw social requests well to choose better jobs after they graduate.
我觉得完全失败了这里。
In summary, the opinion of the speaker is persuasive enough. Education is a systemic work which need both parents and communities involving in besides a group of professional
后来没有抓牢主题了，前面不错

forestlevyUID：2320694

Education is an important affair to both students and educators, both parests and communities. (四个玩意并列,能这么用both么?)In the issue, the speaker declaims(claims 就好了......) that besides professional educatiors, parents and communities also should(should also) take part in the local schools. I agree with the broad assertion of the speaker. (这两短句要合一起 I agree with the borad assertion of the speaker, which claims that...)In the detailed methods to implement this idea, I consider that parents and communities should choose proper ways to participate in education.(开头没大问题)

At the beginning of all, I agree with the speaker that both parents and communities must be involved in the local schools.(合一起啦?) Nowadays, education is an important standard to evalue that developing levels of nations and countries. We can see that the developed countires always have the best systems of educations, which have activate all factors arround educations and students.(走题了.教育的重要性和家长/社区参与的必要性有关系么?) For example, in the United States students of primary schools usually have some homeworks needing to do with their parents or relatives. Such kinds of homeworks could attract parents in the education of the local schools. Moreover, departments of communities usually control some budgets of educations. In China, besides educational departments of communities, there are some other communities are involved in the local schools. Some communities provide working positions for students to practice in society. Some communities bring a lot of money for poor students to help them finish their school works. Because parents and communities could do many crucial works for education assistant to professional educatores, the broad assertion of the speaker is reasonal to advance education scientifically.(后面没问题,再细化一点更好)

However, the speaker should give more detailed information about his suggestion. Because both parents and communities are not professional as educators, they often do some improper actions to education. In the following parts, I will discuss this problem further in order to analyze completely.(恩, 这段这么表达更好: However, since both parents and communities are not as professional as educators, it is possible that they may do improper actions to the education of children. Thus, one cannot simply suggest that they should be involved in education without any further and detailed advice. As for me, I believe that their participation need to obey the following suggestions:)

Firstly, because praents always use to excessly love(coddle/spoil) children, parents should be trained by professional educators to teach their children in right methods. In some families, scientific educational methods are hard to pratice constantly which are not positive for education. Parents easily give up schedules because of children's request. Or some parents would implement educational plans by their points or experience which are not corrent to their children's education. In these instances, parents should be trained often by professional teachers of their children to accept right opinions about home-education which is an important part of education.(重复啦!把前面的去掉...)

Secondly, communities should also be trained to be known about scientific education.(歧异啊...) Communities always play important roles in educations. (废话!说过了.)In local schools, professional educators always ask students to take part in local activities of communities. Therefore, communities should often organize proper practicing plans for different age students. For example, for little age(晕.) students communities could bring them to natural parks or zooes to help them contact with nature. For university students, communities could provide some actural positions in companies or community departments to help them konw social requests well to choose better jobs after they graduate.(上段是说怎么不好,这段也应该说社区教育可能存在的弊端才是撒)

In summary, the opinion of the speaker is persuasive enough. Education is a systemic work which need both parents and communities involving in besides a group of professional educators. If parents and communities could take part in the local schools properly, education could develop better than before.(中规中矩吧.)

woodmanUID：161906

Educationis an important affair to both students and educators,both parests and communities（不要这样写吧，四个是并列成分）. In the issue, the speakerdeclaims that besides professional educatiors, parents and communities alsoshould take part in the local schools. I agree with the broad assertion of thespeaker. In the detailed methods to implement this idea, I consider thatparents and communities should choose proper ways to participate in education.

At thebeginning of all, I agree with the speaker that both parents and communitiesmust be involved in the local schools. Nowadays, education is an importantstandard to evalue that developing levels of nations and countries. We can seethat the developed countires always have the best systems of educations, whichhave activate all factors arround educations and students. For example, in the United Statesstudents of primary schools usually have some homeworks needing to do withtheir parents or relatives. Such kinds of homeworks could attract parents inthe education of the local schools. Moreover, departments of communitiesusually control some budgets of educations. In China, besides educationaldepartments of communities, there are some other communities are involved inthe local schools. Some communities provide working positions for students topractice in society. Some communities bring a lot of money for poor students tohelp them finish their school works. Because parents and communities could domany crucial works for education assistant to professional educatores, thebroad assertion of the speaker is reasonal to advance education scientifically.1.教育的重要性是题目给定的前提，所以不需要花笔墨去论述教育多重要，而是要讨论为什么家长和社会要参与教育。2.两个合在一起写很难写得很深刻的

However, the speaker should give more detailed informationabout his suggestion.（怎么像argu的写法？）Because both parents and communitiesare not professional as educators, they often do some improper actions toeducation. In the following parts, I will discuss this problem further in orderto analyze completely.

Firstly,because praents always use to excessly love（溺爱doteon）children, parents should be trained by professional educators to teach theirchildren in right methods. In some families, scientific educational methods arehard to practice constantly which are not positive for education. Parentseasily give up schedules because of children's request. Or some parents wouldimplement educational plans by their points or experience which are not correntto their children's education. In these instances, parents should be trainedoften by professional teachers of their children to accept right opinions abouthome-education which is an important part of education.

Secondly,communities should also be trained to be known about scientific education.Communities always play important roles in educations. In local schools,professional educators always ask students to take part in local activities ofcommunities. Therefore, communities should often organize proper practicingplans for different age students. For example, for little age studentscommunities could bring them to natural parks or zooes to help them contactwith nature. For university students, communities could provide some acturalpositions in companies or community departments to help them konw socialrequests well to choose better jobs after they graduate.你这个没有提到improper啊

Insummary, the opinion of the speaker is persuasive enough. Education is asystemic work which need both parents and communities involving in besides agroup of professional educators. If parents and communities could take part inthe local schools properly, education could develop better than before.停留在简单的复述

这篇写得有点跑路了，前面不应该提教育的重要性，后面说适当参与，笔墨不应该花很多，我觉得写适当参与是为了显示我们考虑周全，使文章更饱满，但是不应该是文章的关键点。你的笔墨过于倾向适当参与这一点，然后这一点也写得有点混乱。嗯，可能审题不准。加油！一起努力！