@@@第一篇大作文 请大家拍砖～～！！！@@@

sytearUID: 2376933

题目：People work because they need money to live.What are some other reasons that people work?Discuss one or more of these reasons.use specific examples and details to support your answer.
正文:   
         Work ,which is considered as a important label to define a person’s characteristic  , is recognized as a necessary part of our life .There is a public debate about the reason why people have to work. Some think money is the only thing we pursuit for and receive from a job .Some believe that besides bills and coins we can gain other valuable things from it .My perspective of this topic is as follows.
In the first place , with your devotion into job, you can have a lot of enjoyment. The most vivid example to support this argument is Messi ,who is the most hopeful football star in the world .Messi was addicted to football and had a unprecedented talent in his childhood .When he is 18 years old ,he come to Barcelona and become a professional football player. Since his interest is football ,every game in the league is a expansive stage for him to show his fantastic skill and he is immersed in over 60000 spectators’ applause .for him ,the incomparable feelings is much more appealing to money.
More over, we can gain recognition from others. Compliment is favored by people even when we are children. We do not pick on our food ,come home on time, and do our homework before we play in order to gain a little red flower showing our parents’ satisfaction with us .   Suppose you endeavor to your job willing to achieve certain goal and you success in doing it .Do you want to show people your production and be recognized as a efficient ,hard working and intelligent man .The answer for most of us might be positive. Fame is as important as money to us .
Finally , you can make contribution to society .lots of people spend time doing voluntary job in organization such as Red Cross and Doctors Without Boarders. Joyce,  a friend of mine, have been working in Red Cross for 2 years. She told me that working as a member organizing donation activity , musical and concert for handicapped children is an amazing experience .Although you can not get income from it ,the smile of those who are helped can make you feel like a millionaire  mentally ,which is much more intense than having a lot of money.
In conclusion, work can offer you fun, fame  and give you the opportunity to give back to society. So when you are choosing a job ,it is significant  for us to focus on  the merit other than money .
谢谢大家！！


         

sytearUID: 2376933

顶一下！

halkingUID: 2291422

you should view what the great thinker have written:

you ask me, in brief, what satisfaction i get out of life, and why i going on working. I go on working for the same reason that a hen goes on laying eggs!!!

that is excellent! isn't it?

sydlxUID: 2152098

thanks for sharing!

siyuandingUID: 2154137

Work ,[基本格式你很不注意，后面有太多太多，先标点再空格，首字母要大写。。。]which is considered as a important label to define a person’s characteristic[这句话有点绕], is recognized as a necessary part of our life .There is a public debate about the reason why people have to work. Some think money is the only thing we pursuit[pursue] for and receive from a job .Some believe that besides bills and coins we can gain other valuable things from it .My perspective of this topic is as follows.[最后一句，我建议你把你下面要写得三个理由都写下来，更容易让人接受]

In the first place , with your devotion into job, you can have a lot of enjoyment. The most vivid example to support this argument is Messi ,who is the most hopeful[one of most ambitious]  football star in the world .Messi was addicted to football and had a unprecedented talent in his childhood .When he is 18 years old ,he come to Barcelona and become a professional football player. Since his interest is football ,every game in the league is a expansive stage for him to show his fantastic skill and he is immersed in over 60000 spectators’ applause .for him ,the incomparable feelings is much more appealing to money.[我怎么觉得feelings 和fame 是一个东西]

More over, we can gain recognition from others. Compliment is favored by people even when we are children. We do not pick on our food ,come home on time, and do our homework before we play in order to gain a little red flower showing our parents’ satisfaction with us .   Suppose you endeavor to [do] your job willing to achieve certain goal and you success in doing it .Do you want to show people your production and be recognized as a [an] efficient ,hard[-] working and intelligent man .The answer for most of us might be positive. Fame is as important as money to us .

Finally , you can make contribution to society .lots of people spend time doing voluntary job in organization such as Red Cross and Doctors Without Boarders. Joyce,  a friend of mine, have been working in Red Cross for 2 years. She told me that working as a member organizing donation activity , musical and concert for handicapped children is an amazing experience .Although you can not get income from it ,the smile of[smiles from] those who are helped can make you feel like a millionaire  mentally ,which is much more intense[intense smile?] than having a lot of money.[怎么还是feel，好像三段都是一个理由--自己的感受]

In conclusion, work can offer you fun, fame  and give you the opportunity to give back to society. So when you are choosing a job ,it is significant  for us to focus on  the merit other than money .[money也是一种merit呀]

[你的文章还是写得不错的，再接再励]

[ 本帖最后由 siyuanding 于 2007-8-16 19:56 编辑 ]

sytearUID: 2376933

谢谢您！格式我会注意的～这个提得很好～
其实归根到底 work能给人的除了money都能归结于感性上的收获 我是分了三个方面来说的～
现在要学习把时间缩短啊～这篇文章写了比较长的时间～还有表达的多样性！大家都加油！！！

sytearUID: 2376933

请大家继续拍砖！谢谢哈！