Argument117【0806G-Sunbird小组】第4次作业

Bellona0428UID: 2418798

TOPIC: ARGUMENT117 - The following is a memo from the business manager of Valu-Mart stores.

"Over 70 percent of the respondents to a recent survey reported that they are required to take more work home with them from the workplace than they
were in the past. Since Valu-Mart has not seen impressive sales in its office-supply departments in the past, we should take advantage of this work-at-home trend by increasing at all Valu-Mart stores the stock of home office machines such as printers, small copy machines, paper shredders, and fax machines. We will also increase stock of office supplies such as paper, pens, and staplers. With these changes, our office-supply departments will become the most profitable component of our stores."
WORDS: 441                  DATE: 2007-11-17

In this argument, the author recommends that we should increase the stock of home office machines at all Valu-Mart stores , and consequently the office-supply departments will become the most profitable component of our stores. To support this recommendation, the author cites a recent survey reported that more work should be deal with at home from the workplace than they were in the past. The author also point out that Valu-Mart has not seen a strong sales, and that resulted from inadequate stock of home office device. Careful scrutiny of these evidence, however, reveals that none of them seems to be logical.

Firstly, the article's author has not shown the survey upon which the argument depends to be statistically reliable. Perhaps the people studied were not representative of  the overall population of people who are working at in all fields. It is possible that people involved the survey just come from some certain special fields, such people as freelance writers, office clerks, so that the statistics about high percent of respondents are not substantiated any more. Lacking a further study on what sorts of fields people worked and the size of the sample, the argument is unconvinced.

Secondly, even if the study's respondents can represent of the entire population of all field, the argument relies on the assumption that this work-at -home trend must cause an increasing on the consume of home office machines. Perhaps along with technological development, particularly computer revolution and internet, people in nowadays deal with more and more work at their home by use of Internet and notebook PC, and subsequently fewer people expend their money on printers, paper shredders, and fax machines that they used them in office. Without researching modern peoples’ working style, the author can not convince me that the change of working style cause a strong consume of home office machines.

Moreover, the argument relies on a wrong assumption that the strong demands on the goods of office-supply department bring the most profit for their store than any other departments'. Yet, the author has failed to consider that those office goods, such as pens, staplers,  only value little. So even if there is a strong demands, their profits maybe only value a small part of the total profits, and the office-supply department is also not the most profitable component of the stores.

In conclusion, the author fails to validate the conclusion that the office-supply department will make  the most profitable value . To solidify the argument, the author should provide more further study about what percent profits came from office goods, and the store's general trade attribute. Otherwise ,the argument is logically unacceptable.

Bellona0428UID: 2418798

这次的觉得很不好写， 感觉没话说上呢

zxxx2972UID: 2367399

In this argument, the author recommends that we should increase the stock of home office machines at all Valu-Mart stores , and consequently the office-supply departments will become the most profitable component of our stores. To support this recommendation, the author cites a recent survey reported that more work should be deal with at home from the workplace than they were in the past. The author also point out that Valu-Mart has not seen a strong sales, and that resulted from inadequate stock of home office device. Careful scrutiny of these evidence, however, reveals that none of them seems to be logical.

Firstly, the article's author has not shown the survey upon which the argument depends to be statistically reliable. Perhaps the people studied were not representative of  the overall population of people who are working at in all fields. It is possible that people involved the survey just come from some certain special fields, such people as freelance writers, office clerks, so that the statistics about high percent of respondents are not substantiated any more. Lacking a further study on what sorts of fields people worked and the size of the sample, the argument is unconvinced.

Secondly, even if the study's respondents can represent of the entire population of all field, the argument relies on the(unwarranted) assumption that this work-at -home trend must cause an increasing on the consume of home office machines. Perhaps along with technological development, particularly computer revolution and internet, people in nowadays deal with more and more work at their home by use of Internet and notebook PC, and subsequently fewer people expend their money on printers, paper shredders, and fax machines that they used them in office. Without researching modern peoples’ working style, the author can not convince me that the change of working style cause a strong consume of home office machines.（这里要说明作业的假设是没有根据的，TS的态度要明显）

Moreover, the argument relies on a wrong assumption that the strong demands on the goods of office-supply department bring the most profit for their store than any other departments'. Yet, the author has failed to consider that those office goods, such as pens, staplers,  only value little. So even if there is a strong demands, their profits maybe only value a small part of the total profits, and the office-supply department is also not the most profitable component of the stores.

这里的说理不是很好，你的意思是说纸很便宜，即使需求大也赚不了多少钱。这种的反例很多了，像自来水，电和煤。

In conclusion, the author fails to validate the conclusion that the office-supply department will make  the most profitable value . To solidify the argument, the author should provide more further study about what percent profits came from office goods, and the store's general trade attribute. Otherwise ,the argument is logically unacceptable.

总的来说文章的逻辑结构清晰，语言简洁。很不错了。 我就挑点刺