[GRE-AWER]issue51

一波疏影UID: 2428286

题目：ISSUE51 - "Education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interests of each student."
字数：530          用时：00:45:00          日期：2008-1-15 11:14:07
The issue of whether education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interest of each student is a complex one, since it involves a lot of complicit aspects between the profession of education and the individual needs and interest of each student. In my point of view, the final judge should depend on a case-by-case analysis of the situation as follows.
What is the precise define of education? since many century ago ,our ancestors have been left us so many valuable literates and books that give us the impress that if we study well, receive enough acknowledge we will be the most great famous people forever, however , we forget the aim of learning. Why are you so diligent to study? I do believe not each one can give a absoultely excellent answer to themselves .Majority people consider the function of education is help people to get more knowledge, that is correct from some stratum, but, the world is so big and complex, and the knowledge is so massive that it couldn't let us to learn every subject, the only we can do is to study which we need and we interest. An educational system that can take into accent the specific needs and interest of each student will help the students to fully develop their distinct potential and talent. In such an education system, students, feeling centered and appreciated, will be more motivated to study. As famous writer once said, the best teacher is the interest.
Though the interest is very important, however, if the interest too detailed and specifically to make them come true, because compare with the number of student, the energy of education is limited, even lack in our country, it couldn’t be reality to ‘specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interest of each student’.
   Even though the resource of education is rich, the aim that education is to cultivate more full development. Students are likely to involve themselves more actively in study if they are offered a unique education designed according to their interest and needs. However, even if educated resources abound, specifically designed education should not take the place of traditional general education. The advantage of traditional general education can give students the most possibility to touch the different subjects and find the favorite knowledge they want continue study, instead, specifically designed education can do this point for students.
   Although complete liberty education in designing is not available to all individual students, school can try their best to offer more choice and autonomy to students so long as the quality of compulsory education is guaranteed. Students can have the most expand to find the subject they want pursuit as their career in the future.
To sum up, due to the above mentioned reasons, which sometimes correlate with each other to generate whole and thus become more convincing than any single one of them, we may be comfortable to say that whether really the education will be effective after it is be special designed to individual needs and interests for each student is still a considerable deeply problem that value us research in future.

[ 本帖最后由 一波疏影 于 2008-1-24 13:00 编辑 ]

saintjUID: 2248994

The issue(觉得不太合适，换成speaker 觉得会好一点) of whether education will be truly effective only when it is specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interest of each student is a complex one, since it involves a lot of complicit (是想说复杂吗？complicated) aspects between the profession of education and the individual needs and interest of each student. In my point of view, the final judge should depend on a case-by-case analysis of the situation as follows.
What is the precise define (definition) of education? since  （大写S）many century （centuries要复数，我觉得把many 去掉好一点）ago ,our ancestors have been left （had left）us so many valuable literates and books that give us the impress that if we study well, receive enough acknowledge we will be the most great famous people forever, however , we forget the aim of learning. Why are you so diligent to study? I do believe not each one can give a absoultely(an absolutely) excellent answer to themselves .Majority people consider the function of education is (to) help people to get more knowledge, that (which) is correct from some stratum, but, the world is so big and complex, and the knowledge is so massive that it couldn't let us to learn every subject, the only (thing) we can do is to study which (what) we need and we interest (in). An educational system that can take into accent the specific needs and interest of each student will help the students to fully develop their distinct potential and talent. In such an education system, students, feeling centered and appreciated, will be more motivated to study. As famous writer once said, the best teacher is the interest.
Though the interest is very important, however, if the interest too detailed and specifically to make them come true, because compare with the number of student, the energy of education is limited, even lack in our country, it couldn’t be (a) reality to ‘(be) specifically designed to meet the individual needs and interest of each student’.
   Even though the resource of education is rich, the aim that education is to cultivate more full development (students). Students are likely to involve themselves more actively in study if they are offered a unique education designed according to their interest and needs. However, even if educated resources abound, specifically designed education should not take the place of traditional general education. The advantage of traditional general education can give students the most possibility to touch the different subjects and find (out) the favorite knowledge they want (to) continue study, instead, specifically designed education can do this point for students.(你这里的意思可能是general education可以提供学生接触更多学科的机会，而specifically designed education can help students to continue the study that they like most，那我觉得这里用instead 不好，用and 就可以了)
   Although complete liberty education in designing is not available to all individual students, school can try their best to offer more choice (choices) and autonomy to students so long as the quality of compulsory education is guaranteed. Students can have the most expand to find the subject they want (to) pursuit (pursue) as their career (careers) in the future.
To sum up, due to the above mentioned reasons, which sometimes correlate with each other to generate whole and thus become more convincing than any single one of them, we may be comfortable to say that whether really the education will be effective after it is be special designed to individual needs and interests for each student is still a considerable deeply problem that value us research in future.

以下为个人愚见，可无视：
1.我觉得文章最好开门见山一点，像第二段的中心，我觉得有点难找。
2.还有就是你这篇文章是根据韦晓亮的思路来的，我觉得思路可以套，但是不要一字一句都一样。
3.最后，我觉得开始的时候没有必要限定时间，就算花很长的时间，好好审题觉得比较重要。
4.格式有点混乱，要么都顶格写，要么都缩进写

一波疏影UID: 2428286

谢谢~~
谢谢致电~