Argument45 飞跃dreams第一次作业

shallinZUID: 2449645

45.The following appeared as an editorial in a wildlife journal.
"Arctic deer live on islands in Canada's arctic region. They search for food by moving over ice from island to island during the course of a year. Their habitat is limited to areas warm enough to sustain the plants on which they feed, and cold enough, at least some of the year, for the ice to cover the sea separating the islands, allowing the deer to travel over it. Unfortunately, according to reports from local hunters, the deer populations are declining. Since these reports coincide with recent global warming trends that have caused the sea ice to melt, we can conclude that the decline in arctic deer populations is the result of deer being unable to follow their age-old migration patterns across the frozen sea."

This editorial points out that the number of Arctic deer that live on islands in Canada’s arctic region is decreasing. To support this standpoint the editorial cites a report from local hunters and a significant increase in global temperature. On the basic of these evidences the author infers that the deer populations are declining because of global warning trends. This argument is logically flawed in several critical respects.To begin with, by relay on local hunters’ report to support its conclusion the argument depends on the assumption that the hunters’ action range. Time and habit are same as deer. Yet the editorial provides no evidence to support this assumption. It is entirely possible that the hunters don’t hunt the deer, so they think the deer populations become fewer. Therefore, the standpoint relies on the report weak.Even if the deer populations are fewer than ever before, the argument unfairly assumes that the deer may die is due to the climate become warning. Yet the editorial provides no evidence to support this assumption. If the temperature increases, the deer’s habitat is changing, their action condition will be changing. Though these living conditions are changed, these don’t result in the deer of death. So the temperature increasing trends do not necessarily indicate that the number of deer will be decreasing.However, even assuming the temperature increasing trends may because deer died. Global climate warming trends is little indication that the local temperature will be increasing. It is possible that the local temperature is same or reduces as before. But there are other reasons lead to the deer died such as the hunters beyond hunt deer limited, the plants on which they feed are deed in large area.In sum, the reach that relies on certain doubtful assumptions that render it unconvincing as it stands. To bolster the recommendation the author must provide better evidence that the a changing range of recent deed populations , local temperature will be increasing in the future and something intimidate deer living. Such evidence might include the following: a clearly survey showing that significant number of deer changing population and local temperature. I would also need to know what competition deer might face in Canada’s arctic region.

[ 本帖最后由 shallinZ 于 2008-1-28 15:41 编辑 ]

sunman163UID: 2404820

This editorial points out that the number of Arctic deer that live on islands in Canada’s arctic region is decreasing. To support this standpoint the editorial cites a report from local hunters and a significant increase in global temperature. On the basic of these evidences the author infers that the deer populations are declining because of global warning trends. (这句话显得有点多余了吧，因为前面第一句ms就是indicate出逻辑关系了吧) This argument is logically flawed in several critical respects.

To begin with, by relay on local hunters’ report to support its conclusion the argument depends on the assumption that the hunters’ action range. (看了半天没看懂这句话什么意思，不过换中文思维翻译了下还行，应该是表达有问题吧：)Time and habit are same as deer. Yet the editorial provides no evidence to support this assumption.（这句作为ts不够鲜明，提前比较好） It is entirely possible that the hunters don’t hunt the deer, so they think the deer populations become fewer. Therefore, the standpoint relies on the report weak.

Even if the deer populations are fewer than ever before, the argument unfairly assumes that the deer may die is due to the climate become warning. Yet the editorial provides no evidence to support this assumption. If the temperature increases, the deer’s habitat is changing, their action condition will be changing. Though these living conditions are changed, these don’t result in the deer of death. So the temperature increasing trends do not necessarily indicate that the number of deer will be decreasing.

However, even assuming the temperature increasing trends may because deer died. Global climate warming trends is little indication that the local temperature will be increasing. It is possible that the local temperature is same or reduces as before. But there are other reasons lead to the deer died such as the hunters beyond hunt deer limited, the plants on which they feed are deed in large area.

In sum, the reach that relies on certain doubtful assumptions that render it unconvincing as it stands. To bolster the recommendation the author must provide better evidence that the a changing range of recent deed populations , local temperature will be increasing in the future and something intimidate deer living. Such evidence might include the following: a clearly survey showing that significant number of deer changing population and local temperature. I would also need to know what competition deer might face in Canada’s arctic region.（最后一段略显啰嗦，看看模板能使你的变简洁）

总体思路不错，错误找的还算比较全，而且逻辑组织也挺到位的，但是语法错误感觉挺多的，尽管ets不强调这点，不过要是多到影响理解就不大好了：）对了，希望以后发帖提交时能先把文章的段落给断开，要不刚开始看的茫然的很呵

lyokaUID: 2451632

第三段说理不是很有说服力，似乎就是一句话在反复绕。
还有题目中提到了migration作文中似乎没有提到，这个应该是个不小的失误。