Argument147 [AERO_ASSIGN12]

katu1204UID: 2355887

147.The following appeared in an editorial in a business magazine.
"Although the sales of Whirlwind video games have declined over the past two years, a recent survey of video-game players suggests that this sales trend is about to be reversed. The survey asked video-game players what features they thought were most important in a video game. According to the survey, players prefer games that provide lifelike graphics, which require the most up-to-date computers. Whirlwind has just introduced several such games with an extensive advertising campaign directed at people 10 to 25 years old, the age-group most likely to play video games. It follows, then, that the sales of Whirlwind video games are likely to increase dramatically in the next few months."

My Answer:

The editorial concludes that the sales of Whirlwind video games will increase in next few month after a nearly two-year decline in the sales. In order to testify this conclusion the editorial’s author cite a survey in which game players indicated a preference for games providing lifelike graphics. Then the author point out that Whirlwind just introduced several such games, aiming at people 10-25years old—the group most likely to play video games. This argument may seems reasonable at first glance, but I find many aspects specious.

First, the argument depend on the survey, but many aspects of the survey is unclear. How many respondents are involved in the survey? Can these respondents be the representatives of the whole videogame players? If the number of the respondents are too low, and the age-range of the respondents can not represent the overall videogame players, the survey can not be a substantial evidence to support the author’s conclusion. To make this survey more reliable, more details need to be mentioned.

Secondly, even the survey is reliable, and the players care most about the graphic quality, but it still can not testify the assumption that customers will buy Whirlwind’s lifelike videogame. It can’t deny that the players may also care about other features of the game, such as the entertainment quality, the price of the game, the styles and content of the game. Whirlwind’s products may have deficiencies on these features. Another point I would mention is that people’s preference to lifelike games doesn’t mean people’s willing to buy lifelike games. As such games require the most up-to-date computers, which many people may lack, it will be the barrier to the sale of such product.

Finally, the conclusion , that the sales of Whirlwind game are likely to increase dramatically in the next few months , rely on an illogical reasoning. Even all evidence mentioned are real, there is still no direct causal relationship between the statement and the conclusion. Maybe before two years ago, video-game players have been preferring lifelike graphics, and Whirlwind have been presenting such kind of products, and Whirlwind games’ characters have been widely known by the its extensive advertising campaign, but  all these have never worked effectively to arise Whirlwind’s sale. If Whirlwind really want to reverse its trend, it should first know its Achilles’ heel, which never be noted in the editorial. Maybe the styles of the Whirlwind game can’t attract players’ heart, and so on. Unless it could notice its weak-points and improve them, it can get real reversion on the market.

liuyang_zanUID: 2456614

The editorial concludes that the sales of Whirlwind video games will increase in next few month after a nearly two-year decline in the sales. In order to testify this conclusion the editorial’s author cite a survey in which game players indicated(show会不会更贴切些) a preference for games providing lifelike graphics. Then the author point out that Whirlwind just introduced several such games, aiming at people 10-25years old—the group most likely to play video games. This argument may seems reasonable at first glance, but I find many aspects specious.

First, the argument depend on the survey, but many aspects of the survey is unclear. How many respondents are involved in the survey? Can these respondents be the representatives of the whole videogame players? If the number of the respondents are too low, and the age-range of the respondents can not represent the overall videogame players, the survey can not be a substantial evidence to support the author’s conclusion. To make this survey more reliable, more details need to be mentioned.

Secondly, even the survey is reliable, and the players care most about the graphic quality, but it still can not testify the assumption that customers will buy Whirlwind’s lifelike videogame. It can’t deny that the players may also care about other features of the game, such as the entertainment quality, the price of the game, the styles and content of the game. Whirlwind’s products may have deficiencies on these features. Another point I would mention is that people’s preference to lifelike games doesn’t mean people’s willingness （ability 意愿本身就有吧）to buy lifelike games. As such games require the most up-to-date computers, which many people may lack, it will be the barrier to the sale of such product.

Finally, the conclusion , that the sales of Whirlwind game are likely to increase dramatically in the next few months , rely on an illogical reasoning. Even all evidence mentioned are real, there is still no direct causal relationship between the statement and the conclusion. Maybe before two years ago, video-game players have been preferring lifelike graphics, and Whirlwind have been presenting such kind of products, and Whirlwind games’ characters have been widely known by the its extensive advertising campaign,（这个也不一定这么绝对吧） but  all these have never worked effectively to arise Whirlwind’s sale. If Whirlwind really want to reverse its trend, it should first know its Achilles’ heel, (好！)which  never be noted in the editorial. Maybe the styles of the Whirlwind game can’t attract players’ heart, and so on. Unless it could notice its weak-points and improve them, it can get real reversion on the market.

jflycaiUID: 2452449

The editorial concludes that the sales ofWhirlwind video games will increase in next few month(s)after a nearly two-year decline in the sales. In order to testify thisconclusion, the editorial’s author cite(s) a survey in which game players indicated a preferencefor games providing lifelike graphics. Then the author point out that Whirlwindjust introduced several such games, aiming at people 10-25years old—the groupmost likely to play video games. This argument may seems reasonable at first glance(我也爱用这个短语 哈), but I find many aspects specious.(flaws in many critical aspects)

First, the argument depend(s) on the survey, but many aspects of the survey isunclear. How many respondents are involved in the survey? Can these respondentsbe the representatives of the whole videogame players? If the number of therespondents are(is) too low, and the age-range of the respondents can notrepresent the overall videogame players, the survey can not be a substantialevidence to support the author’s conclusion. To make this survey more reliable,more details need to be mentioned.(结构不错)

Secondly, even the （result of the）survey is reliable, and the players care ( concern) most about thegraphic quality, but （不要but）it still cannot testify the assumption that customers will buy Whirlwind’s lifelikevideogame. It can’t deny that (有点怪 it is possible that )the players may also care about other featuresof the game, such as the entertainment quality, the price of the game, thestyles and content of the game. Whirlwind’s products may have deficiencies onthese features. Another point I would mention is that people’s preference tolifelike games doesn’t mean(account to) people’s willing to buy lifelike games.As such games require the most up-to-date computers, which many people may lack（can not afford）, it will be the barrier to thesale of such product.

Finally, the conclusion, that the sales of Whirlwind game are likely toincrease dramatically in the next few months, rely on an illogical reasoning.Even all evidence mentioned are real, there is still no direct causalrelationship between the statement and the conclusion. （这句比较万能）Maybe before two years ago,video-game players have been preferring lifelike graphics, and Whirlwind havebeen presenting such kind of products, and Whirlwind games’ characters havebeen widely known by the its extensive advertising campaign, but  allthese have never worked effectively to arise Whirlwind’s sale. If Whirlwindreally want to reverse its trend, it should first know its Achilles’ heel(这个难道是。。古希腊传说), which never be notedin the editorial. Maybe the styles of the Whirlwind game can’t attract players’heart (can not attract players’ eyeball), and so on (貌似没有递进关系). Unless it could noticeits weak-points and improve them, it can get real reversion on the market.（最后一句）

注意第三人称单数