issue11[Jet小组]第11次作业

sallytxhUID: 2360795

Issue11
"All nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems."

Should all nations help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world’s most persistent social problems, as the author alleges? In a sense, I tend to concede that society needs more persons who can solve the world’s most persistent social problem. However, I do not completely side with this statement because the author claims the view by overlooking the crucial rule of another issue and unfairly give them a second priority. In my point view, the conclusion about building a global university is questionable.

In the first place, although human being has entered anew era which is connection closely, it does not mean all nation should support the development of a global university. Everyone knows that every nation has their different circumstances. This means they have their own problems. Yet, global university only can help to establish a common ground or reach a consensus. To illustrate this point clearly, we can see an example as fellow. The population of China is almost 160 billion while it is decline in Europe and these European nations need to increase their population to solve the problem that corporations are pressed for employee. When a Swedish student studies to planed parenthood for controlling population in a global university, he will not find any job in his nation because it needs the person who can plan to increase its population.

In addition, even all nationsshould help support the development of a global university, but some students do not interest in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems. In order to see this point clearly, let us see an example. Bill Gates entered Harvard in 1973, and he made his decision to drop out for university. Tow years later when he and Allen started the engine of Microsoft, many people did not understand why Gates gave up such a good opportunity to study in the world’s No.1 University. However, with size comes power, Microsoft dominates the PC market with its operating systems, such as MS-DOS and windows. Now, Microsoft becomes the biggest software company in the world and Bill Gates becomes the richest man in the world. So even students do not enter the best university and they can not accept the best education because do not like to solve the world's most persistent social problems, they can also accelerate the development of our society.   

Nevertheless, even students would like to contribute achievement to society, but solving the world's most persistent social problems oversteps the students’ capability. Not all students can help to solve the problems of society. If they can do it, our society will become well-off and peace. Yet, the world permeates many instability factors. Forever, in order to ravel out the problems we need all people in the world to cooperate with each other, but not only several students.

To sum up, I fundamentally disagree with the conclusion that all nations should enter support the development of a global university and engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems. In fact, not all nations can help support the development of society. Moreover, not all students in a global university want to solve the world's most persistent social problems.

ljc-dreamUID: 2166457

Issue11
"All nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems."
Should all nations help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world’s most persistent social problems, as the author alleges? In a sense, I tend to concede that society注意在文章中不要出现单数可数名词 needs more persons who can solve the world’s most persistent social problem. However, I do not completely side with this statement because the author claims the view by overlooking the crucial rule of another issue and unfairly give them a second priority. In my point view, the conclusion about building a global university is questionable.

In the first place, although human being has entered anew era which is connectionconnected closely, it does not mean all nation should support the development of a global university. Everyone knows that every nation has their different circumstances. This means they have their own problems. Yet, global university only can help to establish a common ground or reach a consensus. To illustrate this point clearly, we can see an example as fellow. The population of China is almost 160 billion while it is decline in Europe and these European nations need to increase their population to solve the problem that corporations are pressed for employee 不好意思，这句话没有看懂，我觉得语法上有错误. When a Swedish student studies to planed parenthood for controlling population in a global university, he will not find any job in his nation because it needs the person who can plan to increase its population.

In addition, even all nations should help support the development of a global university, but some students do not interest in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems. In order to see this point clearly, let us see an example. Bill Gates entered Harvard in 1973, and he made his decision to drop out for university. Tow years later when he and Allen started the engine of Microsoft, many people did not understand why Gates gave up such a good opportunity to study in the world’s No.1 University. However, with size comes power, Microsoft dominates the PC market with its operating systems, such as MS-DOS and windows. Now, Microsoft becomes the biggest software company in the world and Bill Gates becomes the richest man in the world. So even students do not enter the best university and they can not accept the best education because do not like to solve the world's most persistent social problems, they can also accelerate the development of our society.   这一段的立意，有些不到位。Topic的主题讨论要不要建立一个世界性大学去解决最棘手的一些世界性问题。但楼主这一段只是提到“有些同学对这个学校不感兴趣”。要表明什么呢？一些学生不感兴趣，就没有必要建？还是，一些同学不感兴趣，这个global university 很难建立起来？

Nevertheless, even students would like to contribute achievement to society, but solving the world's most persistent social problems oversteps the students’ capability. Not all students can help to solve the problems of society. If they can do it, our society will become well-off and peace. Yet, the world permeates many instability factors. Forever, in order to ravel out the problems we need all people in the world to cooperate with each other, but not only several students.

To sum up, I fundamentally disagree with the conclusion that all nations should enter support the development of a global university and engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems. 又把题目抄写了一遍，也许换个表述方式会显得文章不那么僵硬。In fact, not all nations can help support the development of society. Moreover, not all students in a global university want to solve the world's most persistent social problems.


文字简洁明快，节奏也控制得很多。我主要挑剔楼主的立意和论据：
题目是“所有的民族致力于建设一个世界性大学”，目的是“解决一些长期存在的世界性问题”
那么存在两个基本逻辑要澄清：1，这个global university能不能建成  2，一些长期存在的世界性问题能不能通过这个大学来解决。
楼主文章主体结构有三段：
1，每一个民族、国家有着自己独特的问题，举了一个例子瑞士的学生研究中国人口怎样减少，那么回到瑞士就找不到工作，因为那里需要的是增加人口的办法。这个例子合适吗？研究的是世界性的人口问题，应该包括中国的人口增长过快和西欧的人口负增长。难道研究人口问题，就只能解决增长过快的问题，而不能解决增长过慢的问题？在我看来，更合适的理由应该是：每一个国家有自己独特的问题，那么，第一，他们没有精力和财力致力于一个世界性大学的建立；第二，世界性大学所研究的一些课题，过泛过大，并不能直接针对自己的实际国情。
2，一些学生对学校教育不感兴趣也能对社会作贡献。因为一些学生不敢兴趣，我们就不要建吗？那么，有些学生感兴趣怎么办？所以说，楼主对这一点论述不到位。也许，我们可以说：这样一所学校并不能吸引那些有才智的学生。所以，建一所世界性大学不是解决世界性问题的有效方法。
3，解决世界问题超出了学生的能力。论据是：“Not all students can help to solve the problems of society”，那么也许有些学生能解决这些世界性问题了？楼主却并没有说明为什么学生没有这个能力，只是说“有些学生不能解决世界性问题”。这个等于什么都没有说，应该提一提学生们思想上还很稚嫩，缺乏社会经验，
心理上还不成熟之类的。然后，再说，应该让更多的人来承担“解决世界性问题”的责任。

楼主一直强调：不是所有的学生对global university感兴趣，不是所有的学生能解决world’s problems。这个思路走得有些偏，毕竟题目并没有说要招收“世界上所有的学生”啊。而且，过多地强调学生，对于这个大学本身的合理性思考的太少。

最后，我一向有些尖酸，所以给人家改文章一向很挑剔，请你原谅，其实，你的语言真的很简练，我很欣赏。只是提醒你以后要在破题上多下些功夫。

[ 本帖最后由 ljc-dream 于 2008-2-27 00:37 编辑 ]