issue36 0806GSTIVE 第四次作业

lanse17UID: 2459286

Considering those artists whose ideas and views are out of step of their times, I fundamentally agree with the author's assertion. However, there are so many examples indicate that the greatness of individuals can be recognized by their contemporaries.  

Some artists or thinkers cannot be recognized to some extent most for the reason that their views and ideas are out of step in the time they lived. Public or critics might not be able to understand or appreciate their ideas. For example, Van Gogh, who was one of the greatest artists in the 20 century, had little success during in his lifetime, while his posthumous fame grew rapidly. He typically used bright colors and thick lines conceived circular patterns, which were not understood fully by common people at that time. However, his works became very famous rapidly after his death in 1890, especially followed by a showing of his paintings in Paris eleven years after he died.   

Admittedly that in some circumstances that the achievements of great people do not obtain the recognitions of public, however, they are only small part of great people, the greatness of most people can be decided by people who live in the contemporary. There are a lot of examples about this case, noteworthy is Hemingway and Einstein in American and Chairman Mao in China.

Hemingway, who lived in the former half of twenty century, had undergone the First World War and Second World War. Various experiences and difficult environment encouraged his creativity in literature and wrote a lot of works, including novels and short stories. One of his most famous novel is "The old man and the sea", which received a lot of people' praise and was considered to be the representative work of Hemingway. In 1952 year, Hemingway gained the Nobel Prize of literature which is one of the highest rewards for artists and researchers. Another example is Einstein, who is one of the greatest physicists in 20 century. His accomplish also was recognized by people during his lifetime. Einstein devoted all his life on studying theory physics and contributed a lot to the quantum mechanics and statistical mathematics. His explanation for “photoelectron effect” helped him gain the Nobel Prize of Physics. He was also known for his another achievement—“theory of relativity”. Even though few people can understand this theory thoroughly, his achievement was still appreciated.

Not only in the science and art fields that great persons are affirmed immediately, but in the political field that the achievement also can be seen by public. For instance, Chairman Mao, who is the political and military figure of China, led Chinese people fight for free from fascist aggressors. After winning civil war in 1949, People’ Republic of China was built in his leader. The great achievement of Chairman Mao is kept in mind by all the people in new China. My grandfather, who is a common person lived in that time, often told me that it is the Chairman Mao that bring happy lives to all people of new china, especially for most workers and farmers.

In sum, unless in the circumstances that public cannot understand one’s new ideas, and then the greatness of this person will be decided by people who lived after him or her. In most cases, the achievements of great people are bound to be recognized by people who lived in his contemporaries.
谢谢

honglingdangUID: 2436513

Considering those artists whose ideas and views are out of step of their times out of step with the times., I fundamentally agree with the author's assertion尽管你说你同意作者的看法，不过在这还是要简短的把你的观点再重述一下. However, there are so many examples indicate that the greatness of individuals can be recognized by their contemporaries.  

Some artists or thinkers cannot be recognized to some extent most for the reason that their views and ideas are out of step inwith the time they livedin. Public or critics might not be able to understand or appreciate their ideas. For example, Van Gogh, who was one of the greatest artists in the 20 century, had little success during in his lifetime, while his posthumous fame grew rapidly. He typically used bright colors and thick lines conceived circular patterns, which were not understood fully by common people at that time. However, his works became very famous rapidly after his death in 1890, especially followed by a showing of his paintings in Paris eleven years after he died.   

Admittedly that in some circumstances that the achievements of great people do not obtain the recognitions of public, however, they are only small part of great people, the greatness of most people can be decided by people who live in the contemporary. There are a lot of examples about this case, noteworthy is Hemingway and Einstein in American and Chairman Mao in China.

Hemingway, who lived in the former half of twenty century, had undergone the First World War and Second World War. Various experiences and difficult environment encouraged his creativity in literature and wrote a lot of works, including novels and short stories. One of his most famous novel is "The old man and the sea", which received a lot of people' praise and was considered to be the representative work of Hemingway. In 1952 year, Hemingway gained the Nobel Prize of literature which is one of the highest rewards for artists and researchers. Another example is Einstein, who is one of the greatest physicists in 20 century. His accomplish also was recognized by people during his lifetime. Einstein devoted all his life on studying theory physics and contributed a lot to the quantum mechanics and statistical mathematics. His explanation for “photoelectron effect” helped him gain the Nobel Prize of Physics. He was also known for his another achievement—“theory of relativity”. Even though few people can understand this theory thoroughly, his achievement was still appreciated.花了整整一大段用来列举例子，一个例子就可以证明了，或者一个详细一个简单一提就可以了，例子是为了证明你的观点，而不是要把你知道的相关例子都写上去

Not only in the science and art fields that great persons are affirmed immediately, but in the political field that the achievement also can be seen by public. For instance, Chairman Mao, who is the political and military figure of China, led Chinese people fight forto free from fascist aggressors. After winning civil war in 1949, People’ Republic of China was built inby his leaderleading. The great achievement of Chairman Mao is kept in mind by all the people in new China. My grandfather, who is a common person lived in that time, often told me that it is the Chairman Mao that bring happy lives to all people of new china, especially for most workers and farmers.

In sum, unless in the circumstances that public cannot understand one’s new ideas, and then the greatness of this person will be decided by people who lived after him or her. In most cases, the achievements of great people are bound to be recognized by people who lived in his contemporaries.

首先，你的第一段没有很明确的表达出自己的观点，你说，你基本上同意作者的观点，但是也有很多人的成就可以被当代人认可，有点两边同样重的感觉，建议改一下，
然后，在说当代人可以评价的时候用了这样的模式：用一小段说明你的论证，并讲了你下面将出现的三个人的名字，再用一大段举了两个例子，最后一段，用毛主席的例子说是不同领域的例子。有点没有条理性吧。不如这样：第一段说在艺术和科学领域可以，然后把海明威的例子详写，在简略的提到爱因斯坦也是这样，第二段写在政治领域也是这样，再举出毛的例子，或者再找个别的方面比如商业，这样就是：第二段写政治和商业上也是这样，举毛的例子，在简略提到比尔盖茨等，不了解没关系，不用详细些，提一下就行了。你看这样整理一下的话是不是会更好？
建议结尾上也是把你的重点突出一下，少些你认为错误的观点，主要写正确的。