comeon作文小组——梦想在望2008 11月11日作业

梦想在望2008UID: 2546295

11月11日
在当今这个社会，人们越来越重视外貌及时尚。你是否同意？给出例子及原因（2006 年1 月6 日）
同意。
理由：
1.人们重视外貌，因为漂亮的外表能够给人留下良好的印象。
2.人们重视外貌，因为美丽的外貌能够帮助人成名，特别是在演艺界。
3.人们重视外貌，因为好的外表能够增强人的自信，尤其是在某些对人很重要的场合。

Nowadays, there is a heated controversy about the appearance and fashion. A fair proportion of people believe that people, in the current society, neglect the attention of them. But, a myriad of people hold the opinion that people increasingly focus on the appearance and vogue. From my point of view, I agree without no reservation that people, in the present, do put a gradual stress on the them. My arguments are listed as follows.

One of the primal reasons for my point is that a good appearance tends to give a good impression on other people. In modern society, more and more people not only pay much more attention to the intrinsic things, but also to the extrinsic beauty. Along with this recognition of the appearance, people also would like to spend too much time and money on following the trend of fashion, and on their own appearances. An interviewee, for example, after the graduation, has an interview. It is very imperative for him or her to focus on the appearance. Especially for those girls, in order to be successful in the interview or obtain a offer from interviewers, they would rather go to take plastic surgery, not taking into account of the possible hazards from operations. In brief, it is a massive number of people tend to put emphasis on the appearance.

Another cause for my idea is that there exists, to some degree, a phenomenon that the appearance enable people to be appealed or popular. In other words, in certain field of society, the good appearance render people be prestigious. In Hollywood, for instance, a huge number of actors came to be famous due to their appearances. Although it is not necessary to have a good skill in performance, they can still be movie stars around the world. Because there is a fact can be undeniable that a variety of people like to watch films casted by the beautiful or handsome actors or actresses. At the same time, influenced by these figures in the screen, people in present, are more likely to pursue the good appearance and fashion brought from them. Therefore, it can be said that there is a notion, in today's society, that people are inclined to highlight the appearance and fashion.

Furthermore, it can be said, to a certain extend, that a good appearance can give people confidence to do somethings important. some people tend to focus on their appearances so as to do something well. Moreover, it is of certainty that people's confidences are boosted by a good appearance, particularly in some substantial occasions. Thereby, it can been seen that a nice appearance is helpful for create the confidence.

In a word, from what has been mentioned above, we can reach the conclusion that, in today's society, people cannot ignore the appearance and fashion.      

jiwasunUID: 2425569

占位，明天把改的贴上来

jiwasunUID: 2425569

Nowadays, there is a heated controversy about the appearance and fashion. A fair proportion of people believe that people, in the current society, neglect the attention of them. But, a myriad of people hold the opinion that people increasingly focus on the appearance and vogue. From my point of view, I agree without no reservation that people, in the present(没有这么用present的，at present), do put a gradual stress on the(the去掉) them. My arguments are listed as follows.

One of the primal reasons for my point is that a good appearance tends to give a good impression on other people. In modern society, more and more people not only pay much more attention to the intrinsic things, but also to the extrinsic beauty. Along with this recognition of the appearance, people also would like to spend too(too去掉，文章主题是同意的，too有否定意义) much time and money on following the trend of fashion, and on their own appearances. An interviewee, for example, after the graduation, has an interview. It is very imperative for him or her to focus on the appearance. Especially for those girls, in order to be successful in the interview or obtain a(an) offer from interviewers, they would rather go to take plastic surgery, not taking into(into去掉) account of the possible hazards from operations.(take account of something或者take something into account) In brief, it is a massive number of people tend to put emphasis on the appearance.

Another cause for my idea is that there exists, to some degree, a phenomenon that the appearance enable people to be appealed or popular. In other words, in certain field of society, the good appearance render people be prestigious. In Hollywood, for instance, a huge number of actors came to be famous due to their appearances. Although it is not necessary to have a good skill in performance, they can still be movie stars around the world. Because there is a fact can be undeniable that a variety of people like to watch films casted by the beautiful or handsome actors or actresses. At the same time, influenced by these figures in the screen, people in present(改成present people), are more likely to pursue the good appearance and fashion brought from them. Therefore, it can be said that there is a notion, in today's society, that people are inclined to highlight the appearance and fashion.

Furthermore, it can be said, to a certain extend(extent), that a good appearance can give people confidence to do somethings(something) important. (上面刚用过it can be said ,我觉得这个地方还是不要用这个了，话可以换个方式说，it is a fact that to some extent, a good appearance can give birth to confidence to do something significant.)some people tend to focus on their appearances so as to do something well. Moreover, it is of certainty that people's confidences are boosted by a good appearance, particularly in some substantial occasions. Thereby, it can been seen that a nice appearance is helpful for create the confidence.

In a word, from what has been mentioned above, we can reach the conclusion that, in today's society, people cannot ignore the appearance and fashion.

梦想在望2008UID: 2546295

谢谢你的修改！

梦想在望2008UID: 2546295

请问我这篇文章的理由充分么》
理由段的展开怎样？
请点评！

jiwasunUID: 2425569

前两个展开挺好的，最后一个最好再加个例子，body部分三个分论点最好指数差不多，不然给人感觉没有展开好

梦想在望2008UID: 2546295

比如说怎样的例子呢