Argument1【0609G Fight 4月初队】第1周第1作业 by nebula

nebula852UID: 2531976

ARGUMENT01
1.The following appeared in a memorandum written by the vice president of
Nature's Way, a chain of stores selling health food and other
health-related products.
"Previous experience has shown that our stores are most profitable in
areas where residents are highly concerned with leading healthy lives. We
should therefore build our next new store in Plainsville, which has many
such residents. Plainsville merchants report that sales of running shoes
and exercise clothing are at all-time highs. The local health club, which
nearly closed five years ago due to lack of business, has more members
than ever, and the weight training and aerobics classes are always full.
We can even anticipate a new generation of customers: Plainsville's
schoolchildren are required to participate in a 'fitness for life'
program, which emphasizes the benefits of regular exercise at an early
age."
以前的经验显示，我们的商店在那些居民对健康生活高度关注的地区是盈利最多的。因此我们应该把下一家连锁店开设在Plainsville，那里有
很多这样的居民。Plainsville的商家报告说运动鞋和运动衣的销售处于历史高点。当地一家五年前因缺乏客源而濒临倒闭的康体俱乐部现在的
会员比以往任何时候都多，减肥训练和体操班总是满员。我们还可以预见到新生代的顾客群：Plainsville的在校学生被要求参加一个叫做"终
生健康"的项目，它强调从小开始经常锻炼的好处。


1 本地居民的喜好和习惯可能会在将来改变
2 没有考虑NW可能面对的市场竞争
3 这个program是强制exercize，不一定促进health food的sale
4 health club,weight trainning 流行，health food就流行吗

   In this analysis, the arguer claims that Nature's Way should build their next new store in Plainsville.To justify this

claim, the arguer provides the evidence that many residents of Plainsville pay more attention to leading health lives.the

arguer cites the example of the sales of running shoes and exercise clothing are at continuous high,and the local health club

get more members than before.In addition, the arguer assumes that the beginning of a 'fitness for life' program,which

designed for emphasizes the benefits of regular exercise of schoolchildren,will certainly purchase their products as a

potential generation.This argument is unconvincing for several critical flaws.

The arguer fails to establish a causal relationship between the sales of running shoes and exercise and the preference

dgree of having sports.The author ignores other likely possibility of the popularity of certain sport brand can also fasten

the sales of sport products.The relavant like of Nike is a cogent example in this case.Another assumption in short of

legitimacy is the causal relationship claimed between the popularity of health club and that of health food.The arguer fails

to provide any information concerning their relationship.The problem is that the two situations are not similar enough to

justify the analogical deduction.It is equally possible that the residents,that are highly concerned with their health and

having sports in health club for most of time,have less interest in health food.Consequently, unless the author can

demonstrate that the causal connection between the sales of health food and sports,the author's concern about these issues is

unfounded.

The arguer's conclusion depends on the questionable assumption that the residents' habitat of leading healthy lives will

stay the same as time flies.The arguer fail to provide any evidences to support this assumption.What will happen in future is

unpredicable.It is possible that the thought of health lives will changing though time or exsied as other forms.Unless the

aruger can rule out the possibilities of what might happen in future,the author's claim about these issues is open to doubt.

The arguer fails to take into account the marketing competence that the new store will face and is hasten to make the

conclusion that their store are most profitable when being built in Plainsville.The marketing environment is one of critical

factors that affect mostly whether the store will gain benefits.Homogeneous stores will surely gain the marketing competence

and is likely to impair the benefits of others.If so, even though the residents there will buy their products, the aurhor's

argument that the profits of store will centainly be improved would be seriously weakened.

To sum up, the conclusion lacks credibility because the evidence cited in the analysis does not lend strong support to what

the arguer maintains.To strengthen the argu-ment, the arguer would have to provide more evidence concerning the popularity of


the habitat of leading health lives is the only condition that residents consider on purchasing the health food of

Nature'Way. Additionally,to make the argument more convincing, the arguer would have to sovle the problem of the unprediction

of time in affecting the sales of their products.Moreover, I would suspend my judgment about the credibility of the

recommendation until the arguer can rule out other possiblities in impacting the fluctuated profits of their products.


Otherwise, the arguer is simply begging the question throughout the argument.



个人复习计划
2月 8日—2月11日  分类写ISSUE和ARGU提纲（分别每天5个，一类一个）可参照GRE写作的分类，

                 旨在熟悉各类题型
2月12日—2月28日           隔天一篇ISSUE一篇ARGU，并且同时继续写提纲（同种类别的剩下的）
3月1日—考试前一周     从不限定时间的每周三到五篇文章,慢慢转变成为每天一篇文章
                     第二周开始限时训练
考前一周             冲刺模考关注机经，同时模考机经里的高频题

cicialiceUID: 2594855

嘿嘿~我也是第一次改文章哪~改的不好的地方多见谅哦~^_^

   In this analysis, the arguer claims that Nature's Way should build their next new store in Plainsville.To justify this

claim, the arguer provides the evidence that many residents of Plainsville pay more attention to leading health lives.The

arguer cites the example of(此处of改成that) the sales of running shoes and exercise clothing are at continuously high,and the local health club

gets more members than before.In addition, the arguer assumes that the beginning of a 'fitness for life' program,which

designed for emphasizing the benefits of regular exercise of schoolchildren,will certainly purchase their products as a

potential generation.(从句主语为the beginning of a 'fitness for life' program，故应改成will anticipate a new generation of costomers)This argument is unconvincing in several critical flaws.(开头段感觉有点长了，较多的复述了文章内容，我觉得还可以简化一些)
The arguer fails to establish a causal relationship between the sales of running shoes and exercise (这里是clothing?)and the preference

degree of having sports.The author ignores other likely possibility of(that) the popularity of certain sport brand can also fasten

the sales of sport products.The relevant like of Nike is a cogent example in this case.Another assumption in short of

legitimacy is the causal relationship claimed between the popularity of health club and that of health food.The arguer fails

to provide any information concerning their relationship.The problem is that the two situations(people’s interests in these two) are not similar enough to

justify the analogical deduction.It is equally possible that the residents,that(非限制性定语从句，不能用that,注意咯，嘿嘿~改成who) are highly concerned with their health and

having sports in health club for most of their time,have less interests in health food.Consequently, unless the author can

demonstrate that the causal connection between the sales of health food and sports,the author's concern about these issues is

unfounded.

The arguer's conclusion depends on the questionable assumption that the residents' habitat(这里是habit，嘿嘿~) of leading healthy lives will

stay the same as time flies.The arguer fails to provide any evidence to support this assumption.What will happen in the future is

unpredicable.It is possible that the thought of health lives will change through time or exsists as other forms.Unless the

aruger can rule out the possibilities of what might happen in the future,the author's claim about these issues is open to doubt.

The arguer fails to take into account the marketing competence(competition) that the new store will face and is hasty to make the

conclusion that their store is most profitable when being built in Plainsville.The marketing environment is one of critical

factors that affect mostly(我觉得这里mostly可以去掉，感觉跟前面criticle重复了) whether the store will gain benefits.Homogeneous stores will surely gain the marketing competence（competition）

and is likely to impair the benefits of others（这个可以去掉，商家只关心自己利益不关心他人利益）.If so, even though the residents there will buy their products, the aurhor's

argument that the profits of store will centainly be improved would be seriously weakened.

To sum up, the conclusion lacks credibility because the evidence cited in the analysis does not lend strong support to what

the arguer maintains.To strengthen the argument, the arguer would have to provide more evidence concerning the popularity of


the habitat of(可去掉) leading health lives is the only condition that residents consider on purchasing the health food of

Nature'Way. （这句肯定要改改的，有两个谓语，见粗体）Additionally,to make the argument more convincing, the arguer would have to sovle the problem of the unprediction

of time（去掉） in affecting the sales of their products（+as time goes by）.Moreover, I would suspend my judgment about the credibility of the

recommendation until the arguer can rule out other possiblities in impacting the fluctuated profits of their products.


Otherwise, the arguer is simply begging the question throughout the argument.

嗨~我们第一篇终于完成了，多不容易啊~先为自己鼓掌个~
我给组长提的建议就是可以中间段论述的时候多加些论据~这样可以更生动一些~呵呵~

nebula852UID: 2531976

In this analysis, the arguer claims that Nature's Way should build their next new store in Plainsville.To justify this claim, the arguer provides the evidence that many residents of Plainsville pay more attention to leading health lives.The arguer cites the example (of)that the sales of running shoes and exercise clothing are at continuously high,and the local health club gets more members than before.In addition, the arguer assumes that the beginning of a 'fitness for life' program,which designed for emphasizing the benefits of regular exercise of schoolchildren,(will certainly purchase their products as a potential generation) will anticipate a new generation of costomers. This argument is unconvincing in several critical flaws.(开头段感觉有点长了，较多的复述了文章内容，我觉得还可以简化一些)
   The arguer fails to establish a causal relationship between the sales of running shoes and exercise clothing
and the residents’ preference degree of having sports.The author ignores other likely possibilities
(of) that the popularity of certain sport brand can also (fasten)acceleratethe sales of sport products.The relevant like of Nike is a cogent example in this case.Another assumption in short of legitimacy is the causal relationship claimed between the popularity of health club and that of health food.The arguer fails to provide any information concerning their relationship.The problem is that the (two situations)people’s interests in these two are not similar enough to justify the analogical deduction.It is equally possible that the residents,(that) who are highly concerned with their health and having sports in health club for most of their time,have less interests in health food.Consequently, unless the author can demonstrate that the causal connection between the sales of health food and sports,the author's concern about these issues is unfounded.
   The arguer's conclusion depends on the questionable assumption that the residents' (habitat) habit of leading healthy lives will stay the same as time flies.The arguer fails to provide any evidence to support this assumption.What will happen in the future is unpredicable.It is possible that the thought of health lives will change through time or exsists as other forms.Unless the aruger can rule out the possibilities of what might happen in the future,the author's claim about these issues is open to doubt.

   The arguer fails to take into account the marketing (competence)competition that the new store will face and is hasty to make the conclusion that their store is most profitable when being built in Plainsville.The marketing environment is one of critical factors that affect mostly(跟前面criticle重复) whether the store will gain benefits.Homogeneous stores will surely gain the marketing (competence)competition and is likely to impair the benefits of NW’s.If so, even though the residents there will buy NW’s products, the author's
argument that the profits of store will centainly be improved would be seriously weakened.


   To sum up, the conclusion lacks credibility because the evidence cited in the analysis does not lend strong support to what the arguer maintains.To strengthen the argument, the arguer would have to provide more evidence that concerning the popularity of the habit of leading health lives is the only condition that residents consider on purchasing the health food of Nature'Way. Additionally,to make the argument more convincing, the arguer would have to take the unprediction of the marketing environment and possible alternation of habit of local residents into considerationof time in affecting the sales of their products.(Moreover, I would suspend my judgment about the credibility of the recommendation until the arguer can rule out other possiblities in impacting the fluctuated profits of their products.Otherwise, the arguer is simply begging the question throughout the argument)不要