TOEFL 2009上半年-Dark_Tournament写作组桑梓的 第二十三次作业

桑梓UID: 2613051

There is no denying the fact that education is playing a more and more important part in our life. In this highly-developed world, we need more knowledge than before in order to be successful. As a result, more attention is being paid to education, especially the teachers. Some argue that teacher should be paid according to their students' performances so that teachers will work harder, others do not agree with this opinion. As far as I know, teachers should not be paid by the students' performances and my arguments go as follows.

First of all, education does not totally depend on teachers, without students, education just does not exist. Only both students and teachers put all their efforts together can education be successful. No matter how excellent a teacher be, if a student does not have the desire to study, his perform can not be good. This point explains exactly the fact that being taught by the same teacher in the same class, some students perform perfectly while some fail to pass the course. If a student has a strong desire to study well and has the ability, he/she can be great even without teachers. So it is unfair to judge a teacher's performance by the students' performances, the students' condition and other factors should be taken into account.

Secondly, if teachers are paid according to their students' performances, in order to pursuit a higher salary, teachers might push the students much harder by assigning more homework and exercise. The extra pressure from the new policy does no good to the students and might end up as an impediment to the development of the society. An idiom says like that "all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy", in this highly-developed world, we do not need dull boys but creative elites.

Moreover, if teachers' incomes are related to students' performances, teachers will be reluctant to teach those students who do not do well in study, since teachers might think that these students' performs will lower their income. Then, al teachers want to teach the top students, and other students may end up with no teachers. As a result, the differences between these students are much larger, the top students will becoming more excellent while others just perform worse and worse. It is obviously disastrous.

R3 G0
From all mentioned above, I believe it is clear that we should not pay teachers according to their students' performances. If we do so, the consequence will be terrible.

风辰的眼泪UID: 2618183

There is no denying（of） the fact that education is playing a more and more important part in our life. In this highly-developed world, we need more knowledge than before in order to be successful. As a result, more attention is being(没有必要加吧) paid to education, especially the teachers. Some argue that teacher should be paid according to their students' performances so that teachers will work harder, others do not agree with this opinion. As far as I know, teachers should not be paid by the students' performances and my arguments go as follows.
First of all, education does not totally depend on teachers, without students, education just does not exist. Only both students and teachers put all their efforts together can education be successful. （论点句过于突出了education的重要性，有点偏了）No matter how excellent a teacher be, if a student does not have the desire to study, his perform can not be good. This point explains exactly the fact that being taught by the same teacher in the same class, some students perform perfectly while some fail to pass the course. If a student has a strong desire to study well and has the ability, he/she can be great even without teachers. So it is unfair to judge a teacher's performance by the students' performances, the students' condition and other factors should be taken into account.
Secondly, if teachers are（虚拟语气用were吧） paid according to their students' performances, in order to pursuit a higher salary, teachers might push the students much harder by assigning more homework and exercise（s）. The extra pressure from the new policy does no good to the students and might end up as an impediment to the development of the society. An idiom says like that "all work and no play makes Jack a dull boy", in this highly-developed world, we do not need dull boys but creative elites. (最后一句写的很好哦)
Moreover, if teachers' incomes（收入好像是单数的吧） are related to students' performances, teachers will be reluctant to teach those students who do not do well in study, since teachers might think that these students' performs will lower their income. Then, all teachers want to teach the top students, and other students may end up with no teachers. As a result, the differences between these students are much larger, the top students will becoming more excellent while others just perform worse and worse. It is obviously disastrous.
From all mentioned above, I believe it is clear that we should not pay teachers according to their students' performances. If we do so, the consequence will be terrible.
写的不错，论据比较充分，语言功底也很扎实，但要注意有些词可以替换使用，不要一直重复。继续加油！！！