cmj&米小饭 作文互改 帖

ddcmj519UID: 176326

这个，由于 cmj 和 米小饭 都有偷懒不改自己作文的嫌疑。特发此帖相互督促。



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【格式】
每4楼为一期，一期同一个主题。
每人占2楼，发两次帖，单号楼自改，双号楼互改。
每次用不同的颜色，并在帖内注明。

比如

3楼里cmj写

第一次改
第二次改

dsffsahfjsakluwefkcnzoq
我觉得这里不好……

第4楼cmj写好后米饭改

第一次改
第二次改

dsffsahfjsakluwefkcnzoq
其实这里有个问题了……

如此递推
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【注意】
这里只是 cmj 和 米饭 互改的地方，其他人可以参考学习，可以以评分的方式或者站内信的方式给我们留言。请一定不要占楼，否则我们会考虑删楼处理。。

有什么意见欢迎以站内信或者评分的方式提出~~~

~~~谢谢配合~~~


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【汇总】
已发布互改的题号

1。190
2。13

米饭袜子UID: 2532172

嗯嗯，强调几点昂~

这里是米小饭和酱酱（cmj）互相督促的帖子~

希望大家配合表占楼~

大家有想法可以用加分的方法提问，或发站内信~

谢谢大家配合~bow~

HIAHIA,这里作为剪彩层吧~HIAHIA~
====================我是剪彩的分割线======================

ddcmj519UID: 176326

190 "As long as people in a society are hungry or out of work or lack the basic skills needed to survive, the use of public resources to support the arts is inappropriate—and, perhaps, even cruel—when one considers all the potential uses of such money."

When will there be a society that no one suffers from starvation? Perhaps the answer sounds desperate for our humanity. From the beginning of human society, those cavemen gathered for safety and food. Till now, we keep the habit of staying together in the concrete forest while still hanging around every single minute for the fulfillment in stomach. We are strong, as well as vulnerable, within the cage of power and right. We may have funds, insurances as well as subsidies from government in case of some catastrophes, but they still seem too little to help when a storm of economic depression swept all over. The Great Depression in 1930s may not be remembered by many but the contemporary one must leave everyone a nightmare. Even the Titan of motors, like General Motors, faces bankruptcy. Even Nike has cut down its faculty number. How will those job-losers sustain their family since then?

Meanwhile, artists are facing poor life. Their spirits in the works may not cater to society at first; their forms of expression may not be understood by most; they can not make enough money from their talents. If there was no such a shock in society, those rich people would like to purchase on arts. But as the depressive wave washes off their extra money, and clears up their desire to purchase on things not practical, arts, under the effects of Lipstick, find their life harsh than ever. What can we do to help? Some of them will give us the lasting value of humanity, others contains the essence of our culture. We can not leave it alone with our consciousness.

But the problem is that, the public money that can be used is limited and far from enough to comfort all needs.

The current situation in China does point out the leading way. At present, even if there was not such an economic strike, there are still a myriad of people in west China living under the line of poverty. Children in those poor counties walk miles to have a sit in a shabby classroom. Their lunches are only potatoes. Potatoes all day and all year. They may look up with their innocent watery eye, showing their desperate needs for knowledge. Bills need to be paid for their classrooms, text books, teachers and etc. They need to be taught how to earn themselves a better life. But when these children grow up, with some knowledge about the outside world, they start to move, to work in cities, buried their homeland culture deep inside to adapt to the hasty pace of modern life. Their homeland culture, a special ritual or some folks or some traditional ways of drawing, are endangered with their scarce offspring willing to learn this nonprofit craft. Culture is diminishing, which were our Chinese once so much pride of.

Fortunately, Government, with their highest morality, has been doing the things at a standard of satisfaction. Large sums of money are paid on the Hope Projects building a firm future for children, while policies and rural culture exhibitions are passed and held to broadcast the traditional spirits. Some local conventions now welcome tourists to enjoy. Some folks are sung at the stage of stadium. Some straw-made pictures have been looking upon, and apprentices are again around the old artists learning the dying ancient art. Our human needs both the material as well as culture to nurture our growth. Elites who take the control of public resources know it perfectly. They combine the food supply tightly with the irrigation of spirits form aspects of culture, in the trail to make members of society live in a life that is warm and enrich.

No one expects hunger. No one likes to be trunk that does not think either. Money can solve hunger, but never will the thoughts. Encouragement is then needed rather than payment to incentive artists to nutrient the famine land of culture. Thus, considered all the potential needs of public money, art is not that worthy paying, especially when considered that only a limited range of artist will share the amount of money. That is to say, to use it on projects that benefit more and their future will count more. Same significance with policies that support artists.

ddcmj519UID: 176326

语言方面米饭实在没发言权，略过（其实是在变相夸奖~~）
嗯，多余的煽情的话就不说了，提我看到的问题吧，提的不对的地方酱酱一定一定要包着米饭昂~
1、        开头两端用大量的生动实例和大篇幅有点背景开头的意思，但看到最后But the problem is that, the public money that can be used is limited and far from enough to comfort all needs.让人突然很失望（也可能只有我有这感觉|||）---------原来前面两大段其实是在扩写原题！把原题又变相复述了一遍。窃以为出题者之所以把这个题扔出来就是因为看到了你开头两端提到的这些种种及But the problem is that, the public money that can be used is limited and far from enough to comfort all needs这个问题。而出题者想看到的是你对“该把钱用在哪儿”这个问题的看法，这个问题私以为应该是文章的主干，如果是这样的话，那么前两段占去如此大篇幅的叙述会不会就显得繁琐冗长了呢？
2、        在结尾我找到你的观点是Thus, considered all the potential needs of public money, art is not that worthy paying。但你BUT之后的两段对这个观点的证明让人看不太明白
先是说到CHINA的西部教育落后问题，进而提出由于那些孩子长大后都十分排斥自己的本土文化导致Culture is diminishing, which were our Chinese once so much pride of.
然后又提到政府的希望工程和一系列复兴文化的政策，我从这段找出一句应该是代表你想表达的观点的一句话：Our human needs both the material as well as culture to nurture our growth。
那么这段和上一段是什么逻辑关系呢？从这段的首句来看，应该是一个转折关系，也就是说这段你想要证明的是政府在文化复兴这方面做了努力而不仅仅是去解决material的问题。
这是我对这两段的理解（可能不对）然后呢？我看不出Thus, considered all the potential needs of public money, art is not that worthy paying。这句话得到了证明。相反，结尾这段让我看到最后感觉莫名其妙。
3、        咱们在BS的时候曾经多次破过这道题，我到现在还是认为，这道题的应该去回应inappropriate&cruel，即，把钱用到art上到底是不是XXX了呢？
4、        感觉你在文章中时而提culture时而提art，很乱，如果你是想把art扩展到culture这个层面上来谈，觉得最好一上来就给定义一下。
5、        结尾段确实很乱额。。。。（版面上的事儿辛苦了。。。我都没帮啥忙。。。。）
No one expects hunger. No one likes to be trunk that does not think either. Money can solve hunger, but never will the thoughts. Encouragement is then needed rather than payment to incentive（额，这个词只有名词和形容词的说） artists to nutrient the famine land of culture.（看不懂） Thus, considered all the potential needs of public money, art is not that worthy paying, especially when considered that only a limited range of artist will share the amount of money（在文中找不到对应）. That is to say, to use it on projects that benefit more and their future will count more（不懂）. Same significance with policies that support artists.

米饭袜子UID: 2532172

米饭第一次自改

When considering the vulnerable groups in society, we inevitably are sympathetic for them and want to help them by any means. Maybe you're just a person who is suffering from hunger, loss of work or the lack of basic skills to earn a life, which actually threaten your surving. However, then, is it really an appropriate or even cruel choice for using the public money not to support you but other aspects of social construction, for instance, the arts? Perhaps, it's just your own perspective, for you may be not clear about how to use the public resorce in actually an appropriate way and the strong effect the arts having on peoples' life.

The public resorce or money should be used for the public. Without doubt, all the human resorce or money in a society is created by the majorities who are industrious. I can't help asking a question that "what are these people working for?" Of course they are taking every effort to earn their own livings and what's more, to lead a better life, which mostly means to improve the quality of their life.
Public money used to support the arts is just a way to reach the goal. The arts, no matter musics, paintings and plays, are the most efficient way to relax social hardworking people. Moreover, the arts, which are more advanced because of being supported, can also have a great influence on people's spirits and attitude to life. Pace back to the ancient times, it is the arts that makes a large contribution to leading humans to civilisation which improves human life greatly. (少example)

But in whatever period of a society, there must be vulnerable people who are still leading a hard life not to mention enjoying（？） the arts to progress their life. Admittedly, on grounds of human virtue， we should and even take a resposibility to help them, say, using the public money buying food for them, creating more positions for them, passing the knowledge of basic skills to survive for them. Yet, such methods probably take effects in short terms, but what really can survive these people are rather the public than themselves. Not every one is born to be rich what ever in materials or in living skills, but most of the original “poor” (这点你明白是啥意思吧，但我表达不出来= =) still own their positions in society through sparing no efforts to improve themselves whiout any help[缺example]. Furthermore, if the public resorce is “always” used to support the vulnerable goups, when can we improve the life of those people creating the public resorce, which should be the original result of using their wealth? Thus, which is inappropriate and even cruel in using the public money remains to be considered.

Even when society is experiencing a hard time, in other words, most of the people are in the difficult living condition stated in the issue, using the public resorce to support the arts is not really that inappropriate. Because arts can comfort people in panics and encourage people to have hopes in creating a new life confronting any difficulty they will be faced with. The most typical example about it is the Great Deppretion in the US. Americans gain a great encouragement and confidence from such arts as the musics, the films, and the fictions to stand up again even though sometimes the arts is just a way for them to escape from the bitter reality. Anyway, the arts indeed works in helping Americans live through that period of time.

So I couldn't find any inappropriatness in using the public resorce to support the arts although vulnerable groups stll exist in society. What really bother me is that if we always give hands to those groups rather than teaching them to stand on their own and if the arts stops developing because of lacking supports from the public, the chances using the public resorce or money in a inappropiate and even crule way are great

米饭袜子UID: 2532172

第一次改

When considering the vulnerable groups in society, we inevitably exhibit sympathy about them and want to help them by any means. Maybe you're just a person who is suffered from hunger, loss of work or the lack of basic skills to earn a life, which actually threaten your surving. However, then, is it really an appropriate or even cruel choice in using the public money not to support you but other social fundamental factors, for instance, the arts? Perhaps, it's just your own perspective for you may be not clear about how to use the public resorce in an appropriate way and the strong effect the arts have on peoples' life.

The public resorce or money should be used on the public. Without doubt, all the human resorce or money in a society is created by the majorities who are studious. I can't help asking a question that "what are these people working for?" Of course they are taking every effort to earn their own livings and what's more to lead a better life, which mostly means to improve the quality of life.  Public money used to support the arts is just a way to reach the goal. The arts, no matter musics, paintings and plays, are the most efficient way to relax social hardworking people. Moreover, the arts which are more advanced by supporting can also have a great influence on people's spirits and attitudes to life. Pace back to the ancient times, it is the arts that makes a large contribution to leading humans to civilisation which improves human life greatly. (example)

But in whatever period of a society, there must be vulnerable people who are still leading a hard life not to mention enjoying the arts to progress their life. Admittedly, on grounds of human virtune, we should and even take a resposibility to help them, say, use the public money buying food for them, creating more positions for them, passing the knowledge of basic skills to survive for them. Yet, such methods probably take effects in short terms, but what really can survive these people are rather the public than themselves. Not every one is born to be rich what ever in materials or in living skills, but most of them are still own their position in society through sparing no efforts to improve themselves whiout any help[example]. Furthermore, if the public resorce is always used to support the vulnerable goups, when can we improve the life of those people creating the public resorce, which should be the original result of using their wealth? Thus, which is inappropriate and even cruel in using the public money remains to be considered.

Even when society is experiencing a hard time, in other words, most of the people are in the difficult living condition stated in the issue, using the public resorce to support the arts is not really that inappropriate. Because arts can comfort people in panics and encourage people to have hopes in creating a new life confronting any difficulty they will be faced with. The most typical example about it is the Great Deppretion in the US. Americans gain a great encouragement and confidence from such arts as the musics, the films, and the fictions to stand up again even though sometimes the arts is just a way for them to escape from the bitter reality. Anyway, the arts indeed works in helping Americans live through that period of time.

So I couldn't find any inappropriation in using the public resorce to support the arts although vulnerable groups stll exist in society. What really bother me is that if we always give hands to those groups rather than teaching them to stand on their own and if the arts stops developing because of  lacking supports from the public, the chances using the public resorce or money in a inappropiate and even crule way are great

ddcmj519UID: 176326

13"Many of the world's lesser-known languages are being lost as fewer and fewer people speak them. The governments of countries in which these languages are spoken should act to prevent such languages from becoming extinct."



When there is a group of people, even a group of animals, who are to unite to fight against the hazards of nature, there are languages of kinds, helping them to communicate so as to form a spiritual castle of safety. A certain group forms their own language according to their living environment and their specific needs. Unfortunately, the number of languages of human falls far behind in comparison with that of human species. Some fo these languages are lost, others are losing. Sometimes the scene seems particular the same as it happens in the natural world, the language of certain animal dying out with its extinction. With fewer and fewer left using these languages, people coaxed by the candies of globalization, actually, in the human world, these culture are deminishing alongside.

Dating back to the day that communication between groups were so scarce that the only facts affecting living was nature. This time, language can never be not easily defeated unless the bursts of devastating catastrophe, like the eruption of volcano beside the Pompeii. After that, communications were enhanced with technology breaking down the boarders, as well as bringing deathly damage to some languages and cultures. The Spanish robberies rushing in, horns of the Spanish-made gunfire forced Mayans leave their birthplace and abandon their sacred temples, thus left a rootless culture that died out in later years. Now that language failed to hand down, the culture and myth of the Maya is still as puzzle as they are.

To our relief, the world seldom witnesses such violence now with so many laws and regulations. But this does not necessary mean it never happens. Economic tides sweeping the world,with merely the priority of profits, companies like Nike settle down their stores in almost every nation. But their factories only locate in those poor countries, Vietnam for instance, for their low price manual work. On one hand, they offered splendid candies in economic development such as huge mounts of job vaccancies. On the other, the invasion of culture is conducted by their homeland executives applying their own management. Gradually, factories workers picked up the idioms and nuances from their bosses with respects or else for the sake of getting approval of the management. Years later, the impact inside certain world-known company can prevail in an area, even a country. For civilians, the invaded language is of something profitable, while their home tongue may be a kind of signal for poverty or so. They start leaving their homeland in search for better life and hide their home tongue deep inside their hearts and seldom use it since then. The more people seek for better life with the communication of other language, the more endangered of their home language and culture there will be.

While we are aware of the loss, too much less can we do to stop the trend. What the government can do is only to encourage museums to document this culture and through media to alert people about this phenomenon. All these strategy will not affect the people who work or tend to work aboard. How to own the profits is what arouses attention of many. They are simply apply the tool of another language to improve their own life! What can the government do? Their people shows ignorance of their own culture all because of poverty. In this way, their culture may be true to diminish in the near future, unless their economic power has grown tremedous enough to attract their people back to nurture the growth of this language, and further the culture behind it. Ironicly, it is because the desire of economic strength that the country suffers loss and may later earn it back.

Nowadays, we have more time to understand the future trends and provide solutions for those critical issues. The Maya's dying out can only be history and the salvation like the Wind Talkers  only is for minority. A poisonous but tasty apple like globalization is, never being able to turn over the trends, we can only learn into it to eliminate the defects. Communication worldwide is of great nessecity. Our culture, crystalized in these languages should take into account. Not only because the specialties that can sparks the ideas from differeces, but the calm bay, full of sunlight from similarity, of culture are needed in their lonly times.  While people take their instant profits most, government should look the leading way much further. Encouraging accent shows or to putting some blessing words on souvenirs may help as it does in China, though they sounds too eager for quick success. Economic-aimed products together bounded up with language and culture, when selling aboard, it advertises as well as makes money. To find similar methods that balance the profits and culture will sure count. And is what the government should pursue in the preserving of language.

ddcmj519UID: 176326

13"Many of the world's lesser-known languages are being lost as fewer and fewer people speak them. The governments of countries in which these languages are spoken should act to prevent such languages from becoming extinct."

米饭第一次改

When there is a group of people, even a group of animals, who are to unite to fight against the hazards of nature, there are languages of kinds, helping them to communicate so as to form a spiritual castle of safety. A certain group forms their own language according to their living environment and their specific needs. 【Unfortunately, the number of languages of human falls far behind in comparison with that of human species.（这一句和下一句之间连接地很奇怪，MS是想表达因果关系？if so,这个因果关系窃以为有点莫名其妙，虽然你肯定会给我解释为什么是因果关系，但这里没写出来就是会让直线思维的某些米国人们感觉你这没说清楚） Some of these languages are lost, others are losing】. Sometimes the scene seems particular the same as it happens in the natural world, the language of certain animal dying out with its extinction.（咳咳，窃以为这句是废话）
With fewer and fewer left using these languages, people are coaxed by the candies of globalization, actually, in the human world（前面都people了，难道还会是animals’ world?,多余的插入）, these culture（感觉不好） are deminishing alongside. （最后这句整体感觉都很不好，首先，就是已经标出的那些小问题，其次，突然冒出个globlaization。。。前面一点铺垫都没有，莫名其妙啊莫名其妙）

【整个这段感觉不太好哦~逻辑关系有点小乱，句子也不如以前简练，嗯。】

Dating back to the day that communication between groups were so scarce that the only facts affecting living was nature. This time,
language can never be easily defeated unless the bursts of devastating(catastrophe： A great, often sudden calamity它本身就含有devastating的意思了，这个词多余)
catastrophe, like the eruption of volcano beside the Pompeii. After that, communications were enhanced with technology breaking down the boarders, as well as bringing deathly damage to some languages and cultures（嗯，这个例子刚和乃讨论过了，有待商榷）. The Spanish robberies rushing in, horns of the Spanish-made gunfire forced Mayans leave their birthplace and abandon their sacred temples, thus left a rootless culture that died out in later years. Now that language failed to hand down, the culture and myth of the Maya is still as puzzle as they are. （额额额额，这段不是要说明natural catastrophe在语言消失中的作用么？这个例子。。。。。。）

To our relief, the world seldom witnesses such violence now with so many laws and regulations. But this does not necessary（necessarily） mean it never happens. Economic tides sweeping the world,with merely the priority of profits, companies like Nike settle down their stores in almost every nation. But their factories only locate in those poor countries, Vietnam for instance, for their low price manual work（咳咳，我查了下，廉价劳动力：Cheap labor、cheap labor power 、cheap work force、cheap labor force ）
）. On one hand, they offered splendid candies in economic development such as huge mounts of job vaccancies. On the other, the invasion of culture is conducted by their homeland executives applying their own management. 【Gradually, factories workers picked up the idioms and nuances from their bosses with respects or else for the sake of getting approval of the management. Years later, the impact inside certain world-known company can prevail in an area, even a country. For civilians, the invaded language is of something profitable, while their home tongue may be a kind of signal for poverty or so. They start leaving their homeland in search for better life and hide their home tongue deep inside their hearts and seldom use it since then. The more people seek for better life with the communication of other language, the more endangered of their home language and culture there will be.】
（额，这个例子举得很好，你想表达的意思我也明白，但是，看到最后有个感觉：除了“NIKE在越南建工厂”这是个事实以外，从gradually后面开始都是你的推测。你先别着急昂，你这些推测可能是事实，但你说出来的话表达的就是“推测”如果你想证明，应该拿出你这些推测的事实来。另外，像nike这种跨国公司在异地建厂是有可能对当地产生一些影响，但你上面“臆测”的那些内容未免言过其实，首先，NIKE在越南建厂的影响好像还没严重到侵略他们的语言和文化了，其次，NIKE还在中国建厂了呢，很容易就反驳你这个观点了）

While we are aware of the loss, too much less can we do to stop the trend.（不懂） What the government can do is only to encourage museums to document this culture and through media to alert people about this phenomenon（这个，我要批一下，前儿才改过一童鞋的文说TA不查资料来着，government在保护语言方面真的只能做这些么？建议查下资料，咳咳，我是查过才敢质疑的。主要是这种根据自己经验来评述的客观事实，如果不对，会让人举着作者态度不端正哦~）. All these strategy will not affect the people who work or tend to work aboard（嗯？这个是回应上文越南的例子？不是吧。。。。晕了）. How to own the profits is what arouses attention of many. They are simply apply the tool of another language to improve their own life! What can the government do? Their people shows ignorance of their own culture all because of poverty. In this way, their culture may be true to diminish in the near future, unless their economic power has grown tremedous enough to attract their people back to nurture the growth of this language, and further the culture behind it. Ironicly, it is because the desire of economic strength that the country suffers loss and may later earn it back.
（我又要质疑了，据我的理解，你这段的分析都是基于上面那个越南的例子，这个例子放在“语言消失”这个问题里来谈首先就不合适，越南语可不是即将消失的语言啊，越南是穷，但人介文化还好好的啊，难道越南国内现在都叽里呱啦的说英语了？再者，就算不是基于越南的例子，那应该是针对people who work or tend to work aboard这个了，那我请问：这部分人口究竟占一个国家总人口的多少？这些人就能影响到一个国家语言的存亡了？本质问题不是这些外出打工的人，而是一个国家发展的需要，你文中提到的这句很靠谱----- their culture may be true to diminish in the near future, unless their economic power has grown tremedous enough to attract their people back to nurture the growth of this language, and further the culture behind it.，但上面这个people提的让你这段的分析大打折扣，又漏洞不说还感觉没分析到位，尽管你可能对这个问题理解到位了，但，表达啊表达）
Nowadays, we have more time to understand the future trends and provide solutions for those critical issues. The Maya's dying out can only be history and the salvation like the Wind Talkers  only is for minority. A poisonous but tasty apple like globalization is, never being able to turn over the trends, we can only learn into it to eliminate the defects（不懂，另外，这个国际化又出现了，前面难道都是在说这个问题？if so again，前面至少要定义下或者提一下吧，至少得至少说一下你哪个例子体现了这个国际化得影响吧，这样开头出现一次结尾出现一次太莫名其妙了）. Communication worldwide is of great nessecity. Our culture, crystalized in these languages should take into account（疯，不懂想表达啥~~~~(>_<)~~~~ ）. Not only because the specialties that can sparks the ideas from differeces, but the calm bay, full of sunlight from similarity, of culture are needed in their lonly times.  While people take their instant profits most, government should look the leading way much further. Encouraging accent shows or to putting some blessing words on souvenirs may help as it does in China, though they sounds too eager for quick success. Economic-aimed products together bounded up with language and culture, when selling aboard, it advertises as well as makes money. To find similar methods that balance the profits and culture will sure count. And is what the government should pursue in the preserving of language.
（倒下。。。。。。。。最后这段为啥我看不懂啊？咋感觉每句每句之间连起来乱七八糟的，MS有关系又看不出啥关系。。。。。。。。= =看了一遍居然不知道你想说啥，这段我保留了，实在。。。）

米饭袜子UID: 2532172

It's not rare to see such titles as "When no one can understand you" in newspapers or magizines indicating that there's only one or two people who can speak a specific language in the world.鸡蛋挑骨头，这句话不好。从这句话开始改写 Faced with the situation that more and more languages are in danger of being extinct, what attitudes should the governments have depend on which significance of languages is more worthy for the states whose languages are endangered.
discribing the situation of those speak a rarely used language. These languages are just like those lonely islands, drifting in the mid of the Pacific ocean of Globalization, wondering their destiney under the influence of profits-made global warming. 声明。。那两个Global 的是我按自己理解加进去的= =  因为着实不能理解你那个政府取决的因素到底是啥。。

An extinct language refers to a language which no longer has any speakers, 我觉得这句话多余 and the reasons why the mass choose to abandon their own languages are various. First of all,the languages that find themselves in the strongest position have all the resources of a national state behind them ;that facetious remark "A language is a dialect with an army and navy" comes uncomfortably close to being true. 这句很绕啊 In most of the cases, languages were overwhelmed by a dominant one. Then, it is the education form generation to generation that determines a language's living state, for what you teach to a child will stay with adults and that's the future. For example, In years past, Americans, Canadians and Australians took native children away from their families to be raised at boarding schools where English rules. In all the Celtic fringes of the British Isles there are bitter memories of children being punished for speaking the wrong language. Even the modern technologies have made contributions to the languages' extinction. Since the television, for instance删, develops so rapidly that it has a deep influence on people, especially its abilities to spread information, thus leading to the fact that languages from those strong states could be soon and widely spread to every corner of the world. All above have indeed risen the crisis of many languages nowadays.是例子没说好还是咋的。没理解所谓的语言消失的原因。孩子被带去学的原因？为什么要这么做。没说明白。  那个电视例子更是不明不白了。

Facing the fact,跟第一段的用词重复 it's naturally for us to take the significance of these endangered or extinct languages seriously。。why。。. Actually, a language has two functions as the tool for human to communicate and the carrier for nations to pass on their spirit and culture as well as the national identities. It is obvoiously that the former one is the most practicial goal which meets the people's immediate needs in life and production while the latter is a kind of human spiritual wealth， for every language is a library of knowledge through its hundreds, even thousands, of years in formation. No matter serve as the knowledge or the natinoal identitis, human spirit can be improved in trying to understand these precious languages 这段要表达什么意思啊。。这题咱再讨论下把。这个写法我很困惑。要是是为了交流的话，一种语言岂不是很助于世界性交流？那么保护了还有什么意思?  
好吧。我联系后面的看了下。这段内容太多。缩到一句话就行了。。否则有偏题的嫌疑。。

Considering both of the main significances of languages stated above, the governments should balance either importance to make the choice in deciding whether act to protec the dead languages, for the quantities of manpower and materials spent on such actions in education, official affairs, and propaganda are enormous. If the state is strong and rich enough to assure its people prosperous life, the local government certainly should take actions to do so, which not noly can enrich people's spiritual life, but strengthen the national consciousness. In the Republic of Ireland, Gaelic has become a symbol of national identity, and is strongly promoted by the government as the country's second language. Instruction in it is required in all schools. And owing partly to a certain geographical isolation and a strong group identity, over many centuries of close contact with English, the Welsh have managed to maintain their language. But how about the poor countries, like many in Africa, who haven't solve the basic problems of famine and common diseas threating local people greatly? The governments had better emphasis on developing their production。 Moreover, using common languages can, to some extend, help them progress by making connections with more other countries.
总的来说，我觉得前面的引入正题花的字幅太长，而且也没有真正说清楚政府的立场。这题既是说语言也是要说政府的。所以文字里应该有平衡政府分配等文字，从语言，从政府的角度全面的分析一下。而不是看到好处冲上去，看到坏处才想一想。上面这段文字，有说到一点政府立场的东西。太少，太不全。我个人觉得。

By and large, it is not a simple issue for the governments to make choice. Admiteddly, these dead languages are of quite importance in human progress, but for the governments, they have to take responsibilities for leading their people to the best way.
我一直很迷惑结尾怎么写。。。看来大家都一样嘛。。

米饭袜子UID: 2532172

第一次

It's not rare to see such titles as "When no one can understand you" in newspapers or magizines 没见过.. indicating that there's only one or two people who can speak a specific language in the world. Faced with the situation that more and more languages are in danger of being extinct,啰嗦，改短。 what attitudes should the governments have 感觉怪怪滴。。depend on which significance 没有选择范围 of languages is more valuable ？这个得合计合计 for the states whose languages are endangered.啥？啥东西。。不知所云。。这句子太长了吧。。一会儿回来肢解了。。。

An extinct language refers to a language which no longer has any speakers, 断句and the reasons why the mass choose to abandon their own languages are various. First of all,the languages that find themselves in the strongest position have all the resources of a national state behind them ;that facetious remark "A language is a dialect with an army and navy" comes uncomfortably close to being true. In most of the cases, languages were overwhelmed by a dominant one. Then, it is the education form generation to generation that determines a language's living state, for what you teach to a child will stay with adults and that's the future. For example, In years past, Americans, Canadians and Australians took native children away from their families to be raised at boarding schools where English rules. In all the Celtic fringes of the British Isles there are bitter memories of children being punished for speaking the wrong language. Even the modern technologies have made contributions to the languages' extinction. Since the television, for instance, develops so rapidly that it has a deep influence on people, especially its abilities to spread information, thus leading to the fact that languages from those strong states could be soon and widely spread to every corner of the world. All above have indeed risen the crisis of many languages nowadays.

Facing the fact, it's naturally for us to take the significance of these endangered or extinct languages seriously. Actually, a language has two functions as the tool for human to communicate and the carrier for nations to pass on their spirit and culture as well as the national identities. It is obvoiously that the former one is the most practicial goal which meets the people's immediate needs in life and production while the latter is a kind of human spiritual wealth， for every language is a library of knowledge through its hundreds, even thousands, of years in formation. No matter serve as the knowledge or the natinoal identitis, human spirit can be improved in trying to understand these precious languages

Considering both of the main significances of languages stated above, the governments should balance either importance to make the choice in deciding whether act to protec the dead languages, for the quantities of manpower and materials spent on such actions in education, official affairs, and propaganda are enormous. If the state is strong and rich enough to assure its people prosperous life, the local government certainly should take actions to do so, which not noly can enrich people's spiritual life, but strengthen the national consciousness. In the Republic of Ireland, Gaelic has become a symbol of national identity, and is strongly promoted by the government as the country's second language. Instruction in it is required in all schools. And owing partly to a certain geographical isolation and a strong group identity, over many centuries of close contact with English,
the Welsh have managed to maintain their language. But how about the poor countries, like many in Africa, who haven't solve the basic problems of famine and common diseas threating local people greatly? The governments had better emphasis on developing their production。 Moreover, using common languages can, to some extend, help them progress by making connections with more other countries.


By and large, it is not a simple issue for the governments to make choice. Admiteddly, these dead languages are of quite importance in human progress, but for the governments, they have to take responsibilities for leading their people to the best way.