Argument38 =August Rush=小组第3次作业 by lela900

lela900UID: 2634833

38.The following memo appeared in the newsletter of the West Meria Public Health Council.

"An innovative treatment has come to our attention that promises to significantly reduce absenteeism in our schools and workplaces. A study reports that in nearby East Meria, where fish consumption is very high, people visit the doctor only once or twice per year for the treatment of colds. Clearly, eating a substantial amount of fish can prevent colds. Since colds are the reason most frequently given for absences from school and work, we recommend the daily use of Ichthaid, a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil, as a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeism."

论点:用Ichthaid-----一种渔油中提取的营养物质可以防止感冒和降低缺勤.
论据:1.一项调查表明,East Meria的人每年因感冒只看一次医生, 而且那儿的鱼销售量高.
2.感冒是缺勤的最常见原因
错误:1.无效调查:未知方式/组织者/样本数量, 而且调查内容值得质疑,人们很有可能有很高的感冒率但在家中自己吃药解决而不去看医生.
2.就算调查有效,感冒率低,但与吃鱼多有关吗?没有任何证据表明吃鱼能防止感冒.很有可能是那里人喜欢吃鱼.
3.即使以上假设都成立,但缺席率真的与感冒有关吗？不排除感冒只是很多人不来上班或上学的一个借口。而且在EAST运用的方法适用于WEST吗？Ichthaid 真的有效吗？

lela900UID: 2634833

In this argument, the author recommends that a nutritional supplement derived from fish oil is a good way to prevent colds and lower absenteeism. To strengthen his opinion, he claims that colds are the major cause for absenteeism. Also, he cites an example taken from East Meria to show the low rate of colds is related to the high consumption of fish. However, a close examination of this argument would reveal how groundless the conclusion is.

At the beginning, the argument rests on an unreliable testing procedure. There is no information about the study method, the representative of respondents and the agency who conducts the study. What’s more, the survey content which concerns that residents in East Meria rarely visit doctors for colds deserves doubt. It is entirely possible that people stock some medicine for the treatment of colds, so when they get a cold, they usually take a dose at home rather than go to hospital. Therefore, the rate of people caught in colds every year drawn from the article is incredible at all.

Secondly, even if assuming the study is reasonable and the rate of people caught in colds is low, but is eating fish a reason for keeping away from colds? The author still fails to provide conclusive evidence to support the assumption that eating substantial amount of fish can prevent colds. Maybe it is merely due to a favorite taste to fish for people in East Meria. So the author cannot draw a firm conclusion within these unknown factors.
Finally, admittedly all the assumptions mentioned above can stand, however, is there a correlation between colds and the absenteeism in workplaces or schools? The possibility that people use the excuse of suffering from a cold to escape from studying and working cannot be ruled out. Moreover, the author does not take the differences between East Meria and West Meria into account, which indicates that the method in East may not be available in West. What’s more, depending on no information about Ichthaid, the efficacy of Ichthaid derived from fish oil is still suspicious.

To sum up, the conclusion is not as convincing as it stands out. To better bolster it, the author should provide more evidence to prove that people in East Meria really have lower rate of colds just because they assimilate some certain substance from fish. What is more, he should also delete the possibility that cold is an excuse to the absenteeism. So based on the analysis above, I will give the judgment until the author can make the article more sound and valid.

Mason.PDUID: 2592013

我看了看 好像和以前你给我的最初文章是一样的~
我把原来的修改贴在这了
还有就是最近的一些想法啊 你的第一论点没有切中要害 建议删了 另外换个有针对性的
还有么 就是建议换换词 xdf的模版人人用 看多了不好是吧
我现在就在想自己的A[模版。。

lela900UID: 2634833

3# Mason.PD
是的，这篇想重写来着，但最近就没时间重写了~
A的模版我也很是头疼。。。到底该不该有，特别是开头结尾，要有到什么程度。。。都是很不好说的。
恩，谢谢！

yangguang_86UID: 2414818

改完了见附件，关于模板问题：我发现北京韦晓亮上课的模板和沈阳xdf所给的模板完全一样，你听听上传的录音是否和南京的一样啊。所以xdf模板杀