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[a习作temp] argument14 by [728西安]小红莓 [复制链接]

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发表于 2009-7-21 23:15:40 |只看该作者 |倒序浏览



TOPIC: ARGUMENT14 - The following appeared in a memo from the owner of Green Thumb Gardening Center, a small business serving a suburban town.

"There is evidence that consumers are becoming more and more interested in growing their own vegetables. A national survey conducted last month indicated that many consumers were dissatisfied with the quality of fresh vegetables available in supermarkets. And locally, the gardening magazine Great Gardens has sold out at the Village News stand three months in a row. Thus, we at Green Thumb Gardening Center can increase our profits by greatly expanding the variety of vegetable seeds we stock for gardeners this coming spring."
WORDS: 575
TIME: 00:30:00
DATE: 2009-7-21 23:12:27


Merely based on the survey that many consumers were dissatisfied with the quality of fresh vegetables available in supermarket, and the fact that the gardening magazine Great Gardens has sold out at the Village News stand three months in a row, the owner of Green Thumb Gardening Center concludes that consumers are becoming more and more interested in growing their own vegetables and suggests that GTGC can increase profits by greatly expanding the variety of vegetables seeds they stock for gardeners this coming spring. Careful analysis reveals several critical flaws of the argument.

To begin with, the survey cited by the author may not necessary to indicate that people would like to grow vegetables by themselves. Even if many consumers were dissatisfied with the quality of fresh vegetables available in supermarket, it may not lead to the self planting vegetables. Perhaps people would buy vegetables in groceries instead of vegetables. Or perhaps people would advice to the supermarket and the supermarket would improve the quality of fresh vegetables so that people would still buy vegetables there. Without ruling out all the possibilities, the author's conclusion is dubious.

Next, the national survey may not representative for the suburban town in the argument. There is no evidence that this town is the same as the average attitude to the quality of fresh vegetables available in supermarket. Perhaps the local people are satisfied with the vegetables in supermarket very much and do not want to grow them. Without given clear evidence that the situation in suburban town is equal to the nation wide, the author could not convince me in this case.

Additionally, the fact that the gardening magazine Great Gardens has sold out at the Village News stand three months in a row is not accurate and may have other explanations. The author fails to provide that how many magazines were published in a row and whether three months is a short or long period. Perhaps the total number of the magazines published in that row is decreased, and as a consequence sold out in there months. Or perhaps three months is a long period compare with other magazines.

Even if the magazines do sale well, there is unwarranted to conclude that the consumers are becoming more and more interested in growing their own vegetables. There is no evidence that the magazines are focus on growing vegetables or the magazines are bought by those who want to grow their own vegetables. If the magazines are basically focused on the other subjects or the people who buy them just want to read them for fun, the author's conclusion may be unconvincing.

What's more, even if the consumers are becoming more and more interested in growing their own vegetables in the past several months, the author fails to convince me that this trend would still continue in the future.

And, there is no evidence that expanding the variety of vegetables seeds they stock for gardeners this coming spring could increase the profit. Perhaps the need for quantity is larger but the need for variety of vegetables would be unchanged in the future. The author also fails to provide the details of the seeds market, without which we could not simply judge whether the profits could increase.

To sum up, the argument is unconvincing as it stands. To strengthen it, the author should give clear evidence that consumers are becoming more and more interested in growing their own vegetables, and expanding the variety of vegetables seeds they stock for gardeners this coming spring could increase the profit.
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发表于 2009-7-22 14:49:37 |只看该作者
1.第二段the survey cited by the author may not necessary to indicate that people would like to grow vegetables by themselves.改成the survey cited by the author may not indicate that people would necessary to  to grow vegetables by themselves.
2.Perhaps people would buy vegetables in groceries instead of vegetables.笔误哦~
3.Or perhaps people would advice to 是名词,应该是se才对~
4.there is unwarranted to conclude 总觉得有问题(个人见解)
5.没有抓住national和locally做文章,全国普查对一个具体地方是否有足够说服力值得怀疑
6.GTGC可能遇到竞争应该也写点吧,凭啥就他赚钱啊?未必

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RE: argument14 by [728西安]小红莓 [修改]
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argument14 by [728西安]小红莓
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