TOEFL集结号 暑期突破小组 作文第七次作业 by 文赋

文赋UID: 2611067

第七次作业：
It is more important to use land for human need than to save land for endangered animals.
不同意this statement；
1. 保护动物，就是保护人类自己，保护脆弱的生态环境；
2. 从文化角度说，熊猫是中国的符号，猎鹰是美国的象征；

In recent decades, our planet's population is growing exponentially, as a result, more and more croplands, houses, factories and high-way have been built up. On the contrary, the land for wild animals is shrinking rapidly, most of them are become endangered animals, and some animals were extinct forever. It is the very time, we should consider to protect those endangered animals rather than to expand our human race's footprints.

Firstly, our ecological system is likely to be unstable, if the number of human and animal lose balance. Animals and plants play important roles to our vital life-support system. It is obvious that if one of them, like honeybee, is extinct; predictably, the other will be impaired severely, because major of plants are unable to reproduce or multiply without honeybee. Consequently, we, human race, will never harvest enough food; even we plunder every inch land from wild animals and change them to croplands. Therefore, we must share this only habitable planet, the earth, with animals and other species, or all of us will die.

In addition, if we could consider this issuse from the cultural perspective, as we all know, some animals are the symbols of countries. Without those animals, many countries will lose their cultural image or even their identify. In fact, one animal not only is the symbol, but also represents the culture of a country. For instance, people associate the panda with China and its long history, understand the innovation and power of the United States form the falcon, and know the exotic and unique native culture of Australian from the kangaroo. Without those precious and also endangered animals, our country and even our culture would be overshadowed.

In conclusion, for our planet cannot lose wild animals, and we could not survive without animals help, we must protect them, and stop abuse our planet's vital and limited land resource. What is more, once some endangered animals are extinct forever, our culture will vanish consequently. Thus, we must save some land for endangered animals, or pay penalty. The penalty is undesirable.

最近病了，身体不太好。随便写写了，也就350字左右。希望考试时的发挥不低于这个水平就行了。

taoyukun-daidaiUID: 2657922

lz加油加油啊！！！

文赋UID: 2611067

lz加油加油啊！！！
taoyukun-daidai 发表于 2009-8-1 21:29

谢谢
不过真是屋漏偏逢阴雨天。本来就病了，今天电脑包的扣环居然又坏了，虽然说是终身保修的，可我却没时间去找他们。郁闷死了。

DriftKingUID: 2664045

;P

It is more important to use land for human need than to save land for endangered animals. 不同意this statement；  L. ~. Z4 X: ~3 D, X 1. 保护动物，就是保护人类自己，保护脆弱的生态环境； 2. 从文化角度说，熊猫是中国的符号，猎鹰是美国的象征； ] In recent decades, our planet's population is growing exponentially, as a result, more and more croplands, houses, factories and high-way have been built up. On the contrary, the land for wild animals is shrinking rapidly, most of them are become endangered animals, and some animals were extinct forever. It is the very time, we should consider to protect those endangered animals rather than to expand our human race's footprints.观点，要保护动物了   O* ^7 O4 J& A: P( g' W Firstly, our ecological system is likely to be unstable, if the number of human and animal lose balance. Animals and plants play important roles to our vital life-support system. It is obvious that if one of them, like honeybee, is extinct; predictably, the other will be impaired severely, because major of plants are unable to reproduce or multiply without honeybee. Consequently, we, human race, will never harvest enough food; even we （感觉此处加个情态动词较好）plunder every inch land from wild animals and change them to croplands. Therefore, we must share this only habitable planet, the earth, with animals and other species, or all of us will die. 生态和人类存亡方面 In addition, if we could consider this issuse from the cultural perspective,（个人感觉，前边有if...了后边应该说“会怎么样”然后词句结束作为主题句。） as we all know, some animals are the symbols of countries. Without those animals, many countries will lose their cultural image or even their identify. In fact, one animal not only is the symbol, but also represents the culture of a country. For instance, people associate the panda with China and its long history, understand the innovation and power of the United States form the falcon, and know the exotic and unique native culture of Australian from the kangaroo. Without those precious and also endangered animals, our country and even our culture would be overshadowed文化方面2 |4 L" x- o2 E2 a In conclusion, for our planet cannot lose wild animals, and we could not survive without animals（animals'） help, we must protect them, and stop abuse our planet's vital and limited land resource. What is more, once some endangered animals are extinct forever, our culture will vanish consequently. Thus, we must save some land for endangered animals, or pay penalty. The penalty is undesirable. 主题很明确，结构很清晰，论证很有说服力，遣词造句也很和谐，简直大牛一个，鉴定完毕！！只有一些小细节需要注意下，加油！ 楼主有时间了也去看看我的吧，给我留下宝贵的建议，非常想知道作者是如何积累这些词汇，短语和句型的，太丰富，太出神入化，还是希望能更多了知道你的方法，因为这方面是我的大弱项之一。 另外一定要注意保护身体，那是本钱，要吃好睡好身体好，才能学习好。 恩，楼主痛并幸福着

hustzwjUID: 203387

It is more important to use land for human need than to save land for endangered animals.
不同意this statement；
1. 保护动物，就是保护人类自己，保护脆弱的生态环境；* ~" T1 \3 f, I2 z% C! Z7 M
2. 从文化角度说，熊猫是中国的符号，猎鹰是美国的象征；* n+ H7 I' ^5 c0 n, m6 E- J7 a* L

红色 错
In recent decades, our planet's population is growing exponentially, as a result, more and more croplands复数？, houses, factories and high-way have been built up. On the contrary, the land for wild animals is shrinking rapidly, most of them are become endangered animals, and some animals were extinct forever. It is the very time,that we should consider to protect those endangered animals rather than to expand our human race's footprints [我想加一个to their territory（home，habitat）].

Firstly, our ecological system is likely to be unstable, if the number of human and animal lose balance(这里怪怪的，虽然我知道你的意思，但是有点不好说). Animals and plants play important roles to our vital life-support （厉害，学习一下）system. It is obvious that if one of them, like honeybee, is extinct; predictably, the other s will be impaired severely, because major of plants are unable to reproduce or multiply without honeybee. Consequently, we, human race,（重复，真没必要，新东方学的吧，哈哈） will never harvest enough food; even we plunder every inch land from wild animals and change them to croplands. Therefore, we must share this only habitable planet, the earth, with animals and other species, or all of us will die.

In addition, if we could consider this issuse from the cultural perspective, as we all know, some animals are the symbols of countries. Without those animals, many countries will lose their cultural image or even their identify. In fact, one animal not only is the symbol, but also represents the culture of a country. For instance, people associate the panda with China and its long history, understand the innovation and power of the United States form the falcon, and know the exotic and unique native culture of Australian from the kangaroo. Without those precious and also endangered animals, our country and even our culture would be overshadowed. 这段写的蛮好！！

In conclusion, for our planet cannot lose wild animals, and we could not survive without animals help, we must protect them, and stop abuse our planet's vital and limited land resource. What is more, once some endangered animals are extinct forever, our culture will vanish consequently. Thus, we must save some land for endangered animals, or pay penalty. The penalty is undesirable

整体上结构很好，而且立意很新，我觉得，我觉得你细节比我写的好，赞一下，小毛病看下就行了，也不见得都对，只是个人习惯而已，呵呵

kuaruUID: 2657291

In recent decades, our planet's population(可以这样说的么？？？) is growing exponentially, as a result, more and more croplands, houses, factories and high-way have been built up. On the contrary, the land for wild animals is shrinking rapidly, most of them are become endangered animals, and even some animals were extinct forever. It is the very time,（不知道这里comma合适否？？） we should consider to protect those endangered animals rather than to expand our human race's footprints. (偶觉得开头很好！！)0 {  F2 L, O/ @7 l$ d  Q8 x3 y: i2 c$ j

* g. |' ?2 v  EFirstly, our ecological system is likely to be unstable, if the number of （between）human and animal lose balance. Animals and plants play important roles to（play role in） our vital life-support system. It is obvious that if one of them, like honeybee, is extinct; predictably, the other will be impaired severely, because major of plants are unable to reproduce or multiply without honeybee. Consequently, we, human race, will never harvest enough food; （例子很好，但和这句话似乎联系牵强）even （if）we plunder every inch land from wild animals and change them to croplands. Therefore, we must share this only habitable planet, the earth, with animals and other species, or all of us will die.
8 A4 n; M/ b2 w2 ]0 ]1 c. T3 |% F' a% M4 H/ xfd
In addition, if we could consider this issuse from the cultural perspective, as we all know, some animals are the symbols of countries. （感觉这句话没说完。结构不完整）Without those animals, many countries will lose their cultural image or even their identify. In fact, one animal not only is the symbol, but also represents the culture of a country. For instance, people associate the（去掉） panda with China and its long history, understand the innovation and power of the United States form the falcon, and know the exotic and unique native culture of Australian from the kangaroo. Without those precious and also endangered animals, our country and even our culture would be overshadowed. （觉得fade away更合适一些）（这一段观点很新颖， ）# v2（） \! Z  R! _- s/ _" D7 }$ m# a

% l6 e( O. M6 ]& }3 EIn conclusion, for our planet cannot lose wild animals, and we could not survive without animals help, we must protect them, and stop abusing our planet's vital and limited land resource. What is more, once some endangered animals are extinct forever, our culture will vanish consequently. Thus, we must save some land for endangered animals, or pay penalty. The penalty is undesirable. （觉得comma用的过多，导致句子不仅凑）看的出来，lz驾驭文字的能力是很强滴，有时间的话希望能得到lz赐教…………) a( S,


看的出来，lz驾驭c4 K! H; b/ L" n  `" F! v6 [