Issue11 【Persistence 小组】第三次作业

小驴子UID: 2222683

11. "All nations should help support the development of a global university designed to engage students in the process of solving the world's most persistent social problems."

• We are living in a more complex society than people in the past time. Different countries have their special history and customs, thus their problems are not the same as one another. For example, some countries are still in trouble of poverty, some are influenced by war or some other are worried about lacking of natural resources. The speaker's broad assertion is magnificent in morality. However, how we can put it into reality and whether it is the best way to solve the world's most persistent social problems is still a question that should be discussed.
  
  I concede that the author is on the correct philosophical side of the issue. So many problems need to be settled in the world today. A global university mentioned by the author might be useful to research on the methods to solve these complicate social problems. If it is supported by all nations, it might gain more money and opportunities to work on the different issue and it might provide its students a broad vision to study more and have more chance to practise what they learn.
  
  
  The ultimate goal of the university is to cultivate student's ability to solve the problems. However, not all social problems can be solved by students because of the 2 reason listed following. First, students are so young that they might not consider affairs thoroughly. Sometimes they could just stop on the surface of the problem and cannot make a complex analysis. What's more, they are lack of experience and practice, therefore even if they could work out the solution; it might be not suitable for nations' different problems. Secondly, many special research institutions already exist and work on the different social issue, whose people are working on in this area for a long time. They might have more experience and background to solve the social problems.
  
  
  Still, to set up such an university would not be an easy job. Numerous problems would barricade not only the found of the university but also its development. For example, which kind of language should be adopted by the leader of the university. It might have students from different places and might solve the problem from different countries. Under this circumstance, learning how many kinds of languages would be enough. Besides, to settle the curriculum of the university is difficult. Because the destination of the university foundation is to solve the social questions which we don't know the answers, setup of the curriculum should be suitable to the development of the students and can help them solving the social issue, both of which are not easy to reach. Even if we can handle all of these problems, we might have wasted a lot money and time which could be used in solving these persistent social issues.
  
  
  Just as what I mentioned above, there are still several other special research institutions and excellent universities which already do a lot of work on these social issue and they have made so much contribution. We also have the United Union which have the authority and power that a university might not have. They might be more useful on handling these persistent social issues.
  
  
  In sum, the solution for the world's most persistent social problems mentioned by the author might be idealistic. So many problems should be first solved to set up such an university. Moreover, there are hundreds of institutions and organizations to do the job in this area, which might have more realistic significance. Therefore， I cannot have the same opinion with the author’s assertion.
  
  

  
  时间90min 字数591 限时进步中

[ 本帖最后由 小驴子 于 2007-2-3 19:56 编辑 ]

欣馨之火UID: 2183210

We are living in a more complex society than people in the past time. Different countries have their special history and customs, thus their problems are not the same as one another. For example, some countries are still in trouble of poverty, some are influenced by war or some other are worried about lacking of natural resources. The speaker's broad assertion is magnificent in morality.（这句话用得好，似乎是改编了北美的，改得好！） However, how we can put it into reality and whether it is the best way to solve the world's most persistent social problems is still a question that should be discussed.

I concede that the author is on the correct philosophical side of the issue. （很棒！北美范文的经典原句，我就背不下来。）So many problems need to be settled in the world today. A global university mentioned by the author might be useful to research on the methods to solve these complicate social problems. If it is supported by all nations, it might gain more money and opportunities to work on the different issue  （issues会不会更好？不是已经有different了吗？但我忘了issue是不是集合名词，有没有复数形式。另：仔细读到你后面，也用了issues，看来俺记忆没错，嘿嘿。） and it might provide its students a broad vision to study more and have more chance to practise  （这个是微软不认，不管它，应该是对的。只是不知道老美是不是习惯了practice） what they learn.


The ultimate goal of the university is to cultivate student's ability to solve the problems. However, not all social problems can be solved by students because of the 2 reason listed following. First, students are so young that they might not consider affairs thoroughly. Sometimes they could just stop on the surface of the problem and cannot make a complex analysis. What's more, they are lack of experience and practice, therefore even if they could work out the solution; it might be not suitable for nations' different problems.  （First这点我自己写的时候也考虑过，用的表达方式是：怎么能期望一个学校培养点儿学生就解决？大致如此。后来自我感觉是不是有点偏题而放弃。我当时的思路是，这样可能不具有说服力。任何一个学校的任何学生，对任何领域来说，都可能存在这样的情况，所以，很具有普遍性，不能光放到global university上来说事儿吧？这点还可以交流。） Secondly, many special research institutions already exist and work on the different social issue, whose people are working on in this area for a long time. They might have more experience and background to solve the social problems.（这里是不是可以适当举例呢？不过，考虑到你的字数大大的够，例不例无所谓啦。我自己把UN放到比较前，呵呵，不过论述方式不一样。）



Still, to set up such an  （a） university would not be an easy job. Numerous problems would barricade not only the found of the university but also its development. For example, which kind of language should be adopted by the leader of the university.  （这儿得用“？”吧？）  It might have students from different places and might solve the problem from different countries. Under this circumstance, learning how many kinds of languages would be enough. （个人认为，语言这个例子似乎论证力度不够，UN就承认5种官方语言呢！建议可以从leader的遴选制度来说，或者从管理体系、管理风格的确定来说。）Besides, to settle the curriculum of the university is difficult. Because the destination of the university foundation is to solve the social questions  （坦白说，这个我在写作的时候好像也想过，不过又是因为不能完全说服自己而放弃。我的疑问是，从题目本身来看，它是engage学生致力于解难领域，那么，这么来说建立这个大学的目的就是要解决难题，似乎有点牵强。不过，我感觉自己的疑问也牵强。值得商榷。） which we don't know the answers, setup of the curriculum should be suitable to the development of the students and can help them solving the social issue, both of which are not easy to reach. Even if we can handle all of these problems, we might have wasted a lot money and time which could be used in solving these persistent social issues.


Just as what I mentioned above, there are still several other special research institutions and excellent universities which already do a lot of work on these social issue and they have made so much contribution. We also have the United Union （UU，不知道什么组织诶。你是想说联合国吗？那应该是United Nations，即UN啊，免费送你一个联合国安理会，嘿嘿，UNSC，SC表示Security Council）which have the authority and power that a university might not have. （实际上，个人认为，UN似乎也没什么authority and power，一天到晚negotiation无数，resolution无数，顶用的没有。呵呵，纯粹个人观点。） They might be more useful on handling these persistent social issues.


In sum, the solution for the world's most persistent social problems mentioned by the author might be idealistic. So many problems should be first solved to set up such an (a) university. Moreover, there are hundreds of institutions and organizations to do the job in this area, which might have more realistic significance. Therefore， I cannot have the same opinion with the author’s  （微软老说标点错误，这个我也没明白，我试过用半角的撇号，好像还不行。错在哪儿了？） assertion.

1.       总得来说，很棒！采取了“平衡”观点，思路清晰。TS明显。
2.       从思想性来说，能够说服人，文章结构性也不错。在具体展开论述时，各段有些值得商榷的地方，已经在文中给出。
3.       语言上，很棒了！如果既没有查字典，也没用word先改过到这样的水平，我拜你为师吧！一般我让word检查，通常拼写错误在5个左右，语法错误也平均有2、3个。这还不包括我很多把握不了而舍弃的词语和句式，为了避免多范错，弄得我的语言很幼稚诶。
4. 加油，加油！A ZA！

[ 本帖最后由 欣馨之火 于 2007-2-4 13:16 编辑 ]