[a习作temp] Argument53【0906G 文以载道三月四月作文小组】第二周第一作业 by Conceptal [复制链接]

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发表于 2009-1-18 23:23:19 |显示全部楼层

【标题】
Argument53
Thirteen years ago, researchers studied a group of 25 infants who showed signs of mild distress when exposed to unfamiliar stimuli such as an unusual odor or a tape recording of an unknown voice. They discovered that these infants were more likely than other infants to have been conceived in early autumn, a time when their mothers' production of melatonin-a hormone known to affect some brain functions-would naturally increase in response to decreased daylight. In a follow-up study conducted earlier this year, more than half of these children-now teenagers-who had shown signs of distress identified themselves as shy. Clearly, increased levels of melatonin before birth cause shyness during infancy and this shyness continues into later life.
13年前，研究者研究了一组在受到不熟悉的刺激比如不寻常的气味和未知声音的录音时表现出轻微紧张的25名婴儿。他们发现这些婴儿比其他婴儿更可能在早秋怀孕，而早秋是他们的母亲分泌的melatonin--一种已知会影响一些大脑功能的荷尔蒙--因日照的减少而增加的季节。在今年早些时候所作的跟踪调查中，这些表现出紧张迹象的儿童--现在已经是十几岁--有一半以上认为自己害羞。显然，出生前melatonin的增加导致婴儿期的羞涩并且这种羞涩将延续至生命更晚的阶段。

【提纲】
1.the author does not provide the background information of subjects-the infants
2.the author ignores other possible elements that might contribute to the level of shyness.
3.the author infers the shy infants were more likely than other infants to have been conceived in early autumn by the reverse relationship between melatonin and daylight. Then, how about those infants conceived in winter.
4. doubting the validity and reliability of the study by sample number and time duration

【正文】

In this argument, the author asserts that the shyness during infancy is caused by the increased level of melatonin-a kind of hormone-before birth and continues into one's later life. He supports this assertion by the observation and result of a 13-year study, which seems to be substantiated. However, some logical flaws can be revealed by careful scrutiny of the evidence showed, as discussed followed.

Firstly and basically, the author does not provide the background information of subjects-the infants. Are the infants female or male? There might be some causal relationship between gender and shyness. What are the nationalities of those infants? What's the family condition of the infants? Distinct genes, different languages and various education methods parents give to infants might also lead to different level of shyness.

Secondly, the author ignores other possible elements that might contribute to the level of shyness. Perhaps the high levels of other hormones existing in human body also contribute to the shyness. Or perhaps the infants have certain inherited diseases which might affect the level of shyness. The author does not provide abundant evidence to illustrate these. Even if we assume the increased levels of melatonin cause shyness, the author also fails to infer how the melatonin works and to what the degree of it works. And, does it work independently? Is the shyness a kind of synthetic symptom of the melatonin and other elements?

Thirdly, the author infers the shy infants were more likely than other infants to have been conceived in early autumn by the reverse relationship between melatonin and daylight. Then, how about those infants conceived in winter. According to the common sense, we could know that the daylight is much less in winter than in autumn. Then, are they the same or different as those sample infants? Are they shyer or less shy than those sample infants? The conclusion of author is unconvincing.

Moreover, the recommendation also fails to be persuasive since the sample is too limited. Can 25 infants stand for the whole group? Can we predict the continuous effects just by 13-year study? We can't help doubting the validity and reliability of the study.

In short, without ruling out the other possible affects and providing more sufficient evidence, the author can not reasonably get this conclusion.

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